The Aftermath of Happiness

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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING MY STORY~~~


Apologies for the late update cause I had several issues with this part as some part were deleted by mistake and there were several errors encountered which made me lose some edited parts as well but anyways, here is the update.


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**** TEAM'S POV ****


I was trying to focus on what the Professor is discussing in front but my phone kept on vibrating on my pocket.


I tried to ignore it at first cause basically there are only few people who know my number so I don't think it will be that important but the caller kept on calling me.


FATHER


3 Missed Calls


My heart suddenly palpitated so hard.


I trembled more when I get flooded messages from him soon after.


"Why are you not answering my calls?!"


"Don't you dare try to avoid my calls, you bastard kid."


"Call me back A-S-A-P!"


I was petrified.


I can only just stare at his messages.


"DON'T MAKE ME WAIT TOO LONG, TEAM."


"DON'T DARE TEST MY PATIENCE!"


Why does he still have the same effect on me although he is nowhere near me now?! He can't do anything to me thru text messages or calls but why do I still feel this scared of him!?


I decided to reply to him but it took me while before I was able to type the message cause my hands were shaking uncontrollably.


"I'm in class. I'll callback once I'm free."


I was hyperventilating while waiting for his response.


"Okay. Make sure to call me soon."


"Just to remind you, if I don't receive a callback until tomorrow, you better prepare yourself for a prize!!"


I was still shaking. What is this time that he want? I know he can't hurt me now cause basically he is far away from me but I know very well what he can do if I disappoint him again. I think he have his own way to check up on me here cause he knew about my ranking during the tryout and he was so angry at me that time that he told me that I better have good results sooner or later or else he will come to get me.


DAMN!! I think the call this time will be about the incoming competition. I bet he will threaten me again that I have to be the school representative and that I have to get the gold medal no matter what.


ARGH!! He can't physically hurt me but he can still torture me very well. I feel so freaking frustrated at my self and at the same time feeling really nervous.


"Hey Team, what happened to you?! Are you alright?" Manaow who is sitting beside me suddenly asked.


"I-im okay." I lied but she doesn't seem convinced cause she is still giving me a weird look.


"Are you sure you are okay? You are shaking.." she said as he tried to reach out to my hands which I moved further away cause she doesn't need to know how cold my hands are right now.


"It's nothing important. I just received an annoying message. You don't need to worry." I again lied then turned off my cellphone.


"O-okay... If you say so." Manaow said but I can still sense that she is trying to check me out while pretending she is convinced that I am okay.


I tried hard to act normal and make it look like I was focusing on the lecture although my mind have already been clouded by random thoughts.


Luckily, Manaow didn't interrogate me about the message I received earlier until all our classes ended.


"Team, you still have swimming practice tonight right?" Manaow suddenly asked and I just nodded wearily as response.


"Then let's go eat early dinner before your practice!" she suggested.


"I can't. I have to go to the club right away." I declined cause I kind of feel like she is just trying to corner me.


"Please?! Let's just eat fast. Just like the old times?" she pleaded.


"Manaow is right, we haven't done it for how many days already." Pharm added trying to show a sad face.


"Sorry guys, I really can't. We have strict training due to the incoming competition. I really have to go now." I said as I hurriedly pack up my things.


Even without glancing at them I can sense that Manaow is trying to signal something to Pharm. I knew it! They are trying to corner me. Manaow must have told Pharm that there is something wrong with me.


"Can't you just tell P'Win that you will be a little late? Please?" Pharm suddenly said as I carry my backpack.


"I really can't besides I don't even know Hia's number or even P'Pruk. I'm going now. See you tomorrow. Bye~" I said and walked away as fast as I can, not giving them a chance to argue back.


As soon as I got out of the room, I let out a long sigh before I ran towards the direction of the swimming club.


I still have more than an hour before the training will start but since I really have nowhere to go and I have no other friends, therefore the pool is all I have now. Besides, I really need to let out my frustration and at the same time I know I have to exert more effort in improving for me to be selected as the representative in the competition so all I can really do now is to push my self again and continue training.


I quickly changed into swimming attire, did some little stretching before I jumped down on the pool. I sat down on the floor of the pool for a while, holding my breath for as long as I can, trying to calm myself. This has been one of the best remedy to calm my self as I temporarily forget all the pain in my body or in my heart whenever I can I see and feel the calmness of the water at the bottom of the pool.


I've done it for three times already but somehow I still feel bothered about my father's messages but I still don't want to call him back. I don't know why but I really feel scared right now. I feel like my heart is about to explode and it's so hard to breathe. I haven't talk to him through phone call since I left our house and I never texted him first as I usually just reply to his messages.


Basically, I am not used to doing the 'talk' with him cause I don't really like talking to him at all and most of the time he is the one doing the talk or more or less the nagging while beating me up. My father loves alcohol a lot to the point that he drinks every freaking single night. He also enjoys kicking, punching, pinching and other physical ways of hurting my body while he keep on telling me how I am a big disappointment to him, how much he hates me, how much he hates my mother, how much be blame me for all the bad things that have happened in his life.


I tried and tried to make my self busy and to not be bothered by his messages but I just end up thinking about it more and more. I kept swimming and swimming aimlessly like how a fish just keep on swimming like it's usual routine inside an aquarium. I will just stop for some time whenever it feels so hard to breathe already or if I feel tired but will just resume again swimming back and forth.


It felt like I was the only person in the world, like there is nothing else existing at the moment aside from me and the water in the pool. I feel pain all over my body but I don't give too much attention as I still keep on swimming. My mind went completely blank already that I didn't realize that there are already other people in the pool area.


**** THIRD PERSON'S POV ****


Few members of the club have already arrived and they can't do anything but watch Team swimming like a robot as the guy seem to can't hear them calling his name.


"N'Pond, what's wrong with Team? Why is he acting like that?" Win who just arrived immediately noticed Team and his weird action.


"Sawadee, P'Win. We don't know what's going on with him. We have been trying to get his attention but it seems like he can't hear us." Pond answered the senior.


"What?! How long have you seen him doing that?!" Win asked sternly making the juniors feel a little scared.


 "I don't know, 'P  cause he have already been doing that when we arrived which is more or less 30 minutes ago already." Pond answered.


"What the hell is that kid thinking?!?" Win said angrily before he rushed to get the megaphone to get Team's attention.


"Nong Team, what do you think you are doing right now?!?" the senior said thru the megaphone.


Fortunately, Team recognized Win's voice over the megaphone calling his name and telling him to take a break which made him stop swimming and only then he realized that some of their club members were already there watching him. He felt embarrassed for himself and felt way too uncomfortable with all the attention but he still tried to show a normal reaction.


"What's wrong, Hia? I'm just enjoying swimming." Team shouted with a blank expression.


"Is that enjoying for you?! What the actual fuck!?" Win fired back angrily.


Team felt weak like he is about to collapse but he doesn't want to show any emotion especially since there are a lot of people around. He was still almost at the middle of the pool so he swam slowly towards the direction where Win is standing basically to hide his reaction and to make him be able to attempt to control his expression first.


"What?! Am I not allowed to enjoy swimming before the training?" Team asked smiling as he stopped at the end of the pool.


"Oii! You are crazy, Ai'Team! You made us worry over nothing!" Pond said as he leave and asked the others to go with him to change into swimming attires already.


"You are more crazy, Ai'Pond!" Team shouted at Pond then laughed a little.


Although Team's face look happy, Win is sure that his eyes were not. He can clearly see that there is something wrong with Team but he also know that he cannot just confront him right now about it. Apparently, Win can understand some of Team's action cause he can see himself in him especially the part that Team is so much just like him who shows a poker face whenever he want to appear strong and unbothered no matter how weak or fragile or broken he feel inside. 


Win looked around to see if there are other people before he decided to to talk to Team without using the megaphone.


"Team, are you trying to get yourself killed?!" Win asked in a low but still firm voice sending shivers to Team's body.


"What are you saying, Hia!? Haha. I was really just having fun." Team answered back with a little laugh but he cannot look at Win directly.


Win crouched down to face Team more closely but the junior averted his gaze. That action just made him believe that he is right, there must really be something wrong with him but he is showing signs that he doesn't want to talk about it or to make others see how he really feels.


"You were basically torturing your body and exhausting your muscles earlier. What if you suddenly got cramps? You could've drowned! And what if no one was around to save you, huh?" Win asked in a very soft yet serious tone which made Team feel something weird within him.


"You are overreacting, Hia. You are so funny, you are making me laugh." Team said before he laughed out cause he is not sure if the senior is showing real concern over him and it kind of scares him a little.


Win suddenly held his chin and made him look at his face directly. Team felt like his heart stopped beating the second his eyes met the senior's eyes.


"I don't know what you are thinking or what is happening to you but for fuck's sake, don't ever do this again. PLEASE DON'T." Win said in a very calm tone but putting a little stress on his last sentence.


Team wasn't able to answer back cause his mind still can't absorb the fact that the senior is indeed showing genuine concern over him with the way he sounded and because of the worried look on his face. Team strangely felt lost in the senior's eyes.


Win saw the sudden change in Team's facial expression. He can feel that the junior felt the sincerity of his words and that is more than enough for him already cause he really just wanted him to realize that he truly cares for him.


Team's eyes suddenly showed a different emotion but for some reason Win cannot seem to identify them. He is unsure if it was sadness, fear, anger or anxiety that he saw. Team might have realized that the senior is trying to read his eyes so he immediately looked away.


"Get up and take a break for a while. I just have to do something first before we proceed with the training." Win said then lightly patted the junior's head.


Before Team was able to react, Win have already walked away from him so he was left stunned as he stared at the back of the senior.


Team got up from the pool and sat down at a bench in the corner, away from the rest of the swimmers. He is still thinking about what have just happened and he can still feel that weird feeling he felt within him earlier. He don't know if it was because it feels like the senior's little gesture have somehow made him feel comforted or he just really feel weird because he thinks the action doesn't seem natural to him.


He is very much confused with what he is feeling at the moment though being scared of his father's action is never new to him but the feeling of being comforted is the one that is kind of new to him. He used to have only his mother who died more than four years ago due to Leukemia or his Granny Lamai who he haven't seen as well for the last three years. Granny is not blood-related to Team but she have been the best grandmother figure to him that's why they called her Granny, she was her mother's babysitter when she was young and when his parents got married, they took her with them and treated her as part of the family. 


He was still lost in his thoughts when Win went to him so he wasn't able to notice the presence of the senior. Win stared at him for a while trying to read the expression he is unconsciously showing.


Team was startled when someone suddenly patted his shoulder and as he looked up to the person standing beside him, he saw Win and the worried look on his face again. He got tensed and felt conscious that the senior seems to be able to see through him. He doesn't want anyone to know about his weak personality and that's one of the reason why he decided to study somewhere far from his hometown cause he no longer want to meet anyone who knows anything about his sad past. He have been bullied, beaten, made fun, tortured, criticized and pitied over and over again in the past and he doesn't want any of those to happen again.


He looked at the warm hand on his shoulder as he wanted to shove it away but strangely he can't seem to make his hand move to push it away from him. He almost panicked when Win suddenly raised his hand up towards his head so he closed his eyes tight cause he thought the senior will hurt him only to realize that he just patted his head. He immediately opened his eyes and saw the senior's small but sincere smile directed at him.


"Hia Win..." Team said almost in a whisper.


"Let's go and start the training, N'Team." Win told him softly and he just nodded as answer.


(Author's note, sorry I am not familiar with swimming training and the like so I really can't put any specific details nor can I explain some things.. please bear me with on this.. I just tried to make sense as much as I can hehe. Sorry and peace out!)


The two then immediately started their routine training and fortunately though Team's mind was still clouded with thoughts, he can still do the routine without a fail at first. Win have been trying to give consideration to Team cause he understands that the junior is trying to act like normal as best as he can however after several pointers and specific instructions given to him, Team seem to cannot absorb anything he was saying.


Win have repeatedly told Team to emphasize or put more effort on his second kick for more power and speed but the junior seem to keep putting less and less force on the kick which frustrates the senior. He have also noticed that Team is not following the breathing technique closely that's why he is having a hard time breathing.


(*second kick - the kick they do after reaching the other side of the pool before going back to the starting position)


Win made him stop for a while and got up from the pool as he talk to him more but Team was still way too distracted to listen. He kept on sighing due to feeling more and more frustrated towards the junior but he cannot let out his anger at the moment.


Out of the blue, Team showed a pained expression on his face as he clutched on his chest and Win felt so freaking scared that it took him a minute or two before he was able to react. He grabbed Team on his arms to support him cause he look like he can no longer stand straight then asked him what is he feeling but Team suddenly freaked out instead.


"DON'T TOUCH ME!!" Team shouted at the senior as he forcefully shoved his hands away.


Win was unable to grasp the situation as he cannot understand why Team will freak out when he was just trying to help him. 


"DON'T COME NEAR ME!!" Team shouted again as he tried to get close to him. He showed an expression which seems like he is scared and angry at the same time.


"What is wrong with you?! I am just trying to help you!!" Win said looking hurt with the way Team reacted to him.


As soon as Team saw the pain in Win's eyes, he felt guilty cause he know he is the one at fault and the senior is actually not doing anything bad to him.


"H-h-hia Win... I'm sorry." Team stuttered almost like a whisper.


"I'm sorry for getting mad too." Win answered back before he slowly walk towards Team.


"Are you okay? Do you want me to bring you to the clinic?" Win asked softly.


"No need... I'm okay..." Team answered as he lowered his head to avoid Win's eyes.


He is sure Team is not okay but he cannot force him at all if he doesn't want to let him know what is going on with him. He used to do whatever he wants to do to others without even asking for their consent and the others will have no other option but to follow what he wants but with Team, he can't do it to him thinking that he might hurt the fragile junior more. Win let out a sigh feeling defeated.


"Win, what's happening here?" Dean suddenly appeared.


Both Team and Win just realized that the attention of the other swimmers were already on them. Win glanced at Team worriedly.


"What's wrong, N'Team?" Dean asked Team before Win was able to answer.


Win felt a light tugging on his jacket so he looked at Team and the junior seem to be asking for his help to get away with Dean's interrogation. 


"Nothing's wrong, Dean." Win then answered but Dean doesn't seem convinced.


"Shut up, Win. I am asking Team." Dean said firmly which kind of scared Team so he slightly moved towards Win's back to hide a little.


"Aww~ We are just barking at each other just like how we used to." Win said trying to cover up something. It is a fact that Win and Team usually bickers a lot but the shouting earlier seems way too serious to be considered as normal teasing.


Dean crossed his arms obviously not convinced.


"We are just really fooling around each other. Right, Team?" Win suddenly asked smiling as he put his arm on Team's shoulder before pulling him closer.


"Yes, P'Dean. We are just annoying each other. Hehe." Team said  as he finally able to get the courage to answer.


"Whatever! I don't believe you both. You two have just made a scene and disturbed everyone's training and now you are telling me you were just having fun..?" Dean said then raised his eyebrows then soon after shook his head. He is clearly not convinced but he opted not to interrogate more cause he know Win will never back down easily so he just left and walked towards the center of the pool area.


Dean then called out everyone to gather because he have an announcement to make regarding an activity they will be having on the weekend, which is basically three days from now cause today is already Wednesday.


Apparently, it have been the tradition of their club to have a trip to the beach as a welcoming party for all the new members of the club. Everyone seem to be happy and excited with the announcement except for Team cause he doesn't like beaches at all.


Win again did not fail to notice the changes in Team's expressions. Team obviously became more bothered as soon as he heard that they will be going to the beach and Win can't help but watch over him from a far.


Soon after, Dean announced that they can all go home already. Every one was still happily talking as they look forward to the beach party adding more pressure to Team.


**** TEAM'S POV ****


"What should I do now? How can I tell them that I don't want to go with them to the beach?!" Team keep on asking himself as he take his time packing up his things.


"Team, why are you so slow today? I've been waiting for you outside." Win suddenly appeared out of nowhere.


"Why are you waiting for me?" I asked confused cause I don't remember asking him to wait for me.


"Arai wa!? Aren't we eating dinner together again?" he asked.


I forgot that we have been eating dinner together after training since he became my personal trainer.


"You can go eat by yourself, Hia. I'm not hungry." I said although my stomach feels empty cause I don't feel like eating.


"Aww~ I've waited for you for more than 15 minutes already. Now, you're telling me to just go without you?" he asked showing a disappointed look but I really have no energy left right now.


"Sorry Hia but I really feel too tired already and all I want is to sleep." I answered without looking at him.


"Let's just go home together then. You know I don't want to eat alone." he said sulking as he sat down at the chair.


I was about to close my locker when I noticed the paper bag that a random girl asked me to pass over to hia Win. 


"I almost forgot about this. A girl asked me to pass this to you this morning." I said as I handed the paper bag over to him.


He is so weird. He doesn't even smile or show any sign of appreciation with the gift. Or maybe because he is already so used of receiving random gifts from his fans?


I heard him sigh.


"Next time don't do this again, okay? Don't let them use you." He said.


"What do you mean Hia?" I asked curiously.


"I keep on telling them to stop giving me random things, I have even refused to accept some of it but ever since they realized that I can't refuse it if someone close to me will be the one to hand it over to me, they all tried to use my friends. And here, they did it to you as well. Sorry." he said with apologetic look.


"It's okay, hia. Let's go home now." I stated.


"Are you sure you don't want to eat first?" He asked again.


"I'm way too exhausted already. You can go eat of you want to. I can go home by myself, Hia." I told him as I walk out of the locker room.


"Okay fine. Let's go." he finally gave up.


I kind of regretted agreeing to go home with him after realizing that we came together this morning using his big bike which means that I will again have to ride it with him going back to the dorm.


He handed me the other helmet and even helped me lock it. I was still standing still as I try to muster up my courage to ride this dangerous thing again.


"What? Don't tell me you are still scared to ride my baby night?" he said teasingly.


I just smiled a little before I went to sit up on his bike.


"Please don't drive fast na, Hia." I requested softly and he just smiled at me before he nodded his head.


I shyly put my hands somewhere near his waist so I can hold on to him through his jacket but he grabbed my hands, pulled me closer then made me hug him instead.


I wanted to take my hands away but he threaten me that he'll go fast if I won't hold onto him that tight.


"Actually I'm kinda scared that I won't be able to notice if you fall asleep along the way so just keep hugging me tight so once you loosen your arm I will take it as you have fallen asleep. So I will know what to do, okay?" he said more like commanded so I just obliged.


The ride was unexpectedly very fun. The wind feels cold yet refreshing and the night view is a little mesmerizing. My heart was still beating irregularly and I still slightly feel the pain in it but somehow the ride made me calmed down a lot.


We were supposed to separate on the elevator but Hia insisted to walk me to my room cause he said he wanted to know my room number. We found out that my room, which is 808, is exactly just below his room, which is 908.


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