Deva woke with a dry sickening rawness in her upper throat that burned with each movement she stirred. Her eyelids felt like steel plates holding her vision captive. A few minutes after gaining consciousness Deva forced her heavy eyes open. Only the small flickers of light emanating from the few candles lit the cave cell. She bit her tongue to keep the pain of her aching muscles at bay as she forced herself up. Gentle hands quickly halted her pathetic attempt. Adamarius hovered above her. 

Deva for the briefest second shut her eyes. "What happened?" She couldn't remember much. It was all a big enormous blur. She could still feel the treacherous pain thou. It was burned in the muscles, skin, and throat. 

"You blacked out. Sometimes the pain is too much and it takes over." His deep sorrow voice caught her off guard. 

Deva raised her gaze but wasn't prepared to see his bruised and scared face. There were claw marks running from his forehead to chin. When she drew her hand up to trace his wounds Adamarius turned away. 

She felt ashamed. "Did I do this to you?" 

"Yes." 

"Why aren't you healing?" 

He gave her a weak smile. "During the curse it's harder for us to heal. I believe were meant to feel the pain as we slowly creep to our deaths. It's easier to kill a lycan while under the Relic Moon." 

Deva straightened her back against the cold stone wall, the shackles dangling beside her. She couldn't believe she lost control. Now she extremely grateful she was nowhere near her husband and child. She didn't want to image what she would have woken up if she was.

Adamarius fiddled with her chains and finally released her from their hold. Freedom never tasted so sweet. Adamarius sat back down and sighed. The dark circles under his eyes made her feel guilty.

"How'd you sleep?" 

He grinned with a slight wince. "Like a baby. Can't you tell?" 

Footsteps were heard down the dark damp hall of the cave. From the corner entrance a petite girl with her blonde hair tied up approached Adamarius. She carried a bucket of water and clothes in her hands. She set them down and frowned before rushing to Adamarius' side.  

"Adam your wounds are really bad." 

"Yes I know." But he wasn't trying to sooth her worries. 

The way she was cooing over him made Deva think there was some sort of crush on him. The blonde, who looked no older then 19, pressed her hand to his face. He jerked away from her touch. 

"Thank you Mia. You can go now." 

It was obvious the girl didn't want to get up. Like a sick obeying love puppy the blonde did as he said and disappeared into the shadows. 

"She's cute..." He gave her a skeptical look. "And probably still in diapers." 

He grinned. "Yup I was waiting for it." Adamarius took a rag and dipped it into the water but before he could apply it to his face Deva took it from his hands. Then she gently pressed the rag upon his torn skin. He grinded his teeth to keep from screaming. 

"You look like hell." She hated that she was the cause of it. 

"Then you should look in a mirror." 

She shook her head to stop herself from laughing. The deep cuts on his face were deep and looked extremely painful. "You really shouldn't piss off a she-lycan." 

"I'll keep that in mind next time you want to claw your eyes out." 

She frowned. "I'm sorry I did this to you." 

Adamarius placed his hands over hers. "Don't be. I'll heal...eventually." 

She was too bitter with grief to agree. She should have had control. Beating herself up now wasn't going to help her but it would make her think twice. 

"Come," he took her hand and led her to the exit. "Let’s check on the others." 

Deva was a bit surprised to see so many lycans struggling with the curse like she was. They were released from their chains and gathering whatever food they could to fill their beasts before the moon arrived again. The majority of people bowed in respects to her. They still acknowledged her as their one and only alpha queen even though she was not technically with their alpha Adamarius. Deva felt calm among them. She didn't have to pretend or hide who she was around them. 

Mia, the blonde who gave Adamarius the bandages earlier, came to check on him once she spotted him across the room. She traced her fingers over his covered cuts and he let her. He flinched and she hesitantly pulled away. 

"I'll get you medicine for the pain." 

"That's not necessary. I'll be fine." Adamarius had lived centuries with worse pain. This was just salt added to his wounds. 

"Adam you need-" 

"I don't need anything." He cut her off with a command. "Go help the others." 

Turning Deva didn't miss the sharp daggered stare the blonde threw her. "Does she do tricks too? Or does she only do those for you in private?" 

Adamarius barked a laugh. "Wouldn't you like to know?" 

Deva swallowed the uneasy lump in her throat. She wanted Adamarius happy. She wanted him to move on. "She'll probably make a good alpha's mate." 

Mia made her way through the crowd, stopping and helping all those who looked like they needed it. Her behavior reminded Deva of her way with the vampire race. She wished she was more comfortable and endearing with the lycans. 

Adamarius pulled her out of her thoughts when she felt him squeeze her hand. "Mia is a great help but there is only one queen for me and I can never have her." 

Deva smiled. "That shouldn't keep you from moving on with someone else." 

His green eyes were radiating with sadness and renewal. "Is that what you really want?" 

How would she feel with him sharing his life with someone else? Would she be able to watch him be happy with someone? Was she okay with him loving someone else?  It had been ten years since they were together, romantically. Then why did it feel like only yesterday? She could still remember what it felt like to love and be loved by him. 

"Adamarius we need you to verify the conditions for the next moon." A tall built man hovered above them waiting for Adamarius to follow him. 

Adamarius broke their deep penetrating stare once he got to his feet. He followed the other man through the crowd not even bothering to look back. Deva stayed only a few more minutes before returning to her cell and shackles. The uninviting atmosphere was almost choking her. Why was she here? Questioning herself Deva slumped to the cold floor. 

How did she even get there? Her whole life was a disaster from the beginning. It was always one obstacle, one hardship after another. Did it really have to be? Was it too much to ask for just a normal life? 

Footsteps were heard in the dark but she knew whose they belonged to. 

"Try not to worry pet. I won't let you get anymore easy shots to my face."

Deva shook her head. He was ridiculous. "I hated that nickname." 

"Just as much as I loved you calling me mutt." 

"You were a huge jerk that tried to chomp off my head." She justified herself. 

"And you were a brat." 

She studied his face but it only brought back chills of the past. She wished all those feelings for him would just stay in the past. 

"How did you do it? How did you escape?" No, that was the wrong question. He had persuasive abilities. He could have escaped the day he was thrown into that cell. "Why did you wait? It was five years when you finally broke out." 

Adamarius ran his nails through his scalp, debating whether to tell her. "I needed to think. That cell was mighty peaceful." 

"Why else?" She pushed on. Something was itching at her to know. 

"It doesn't matter now," he exhaled. 

"What made you finally leave?" Every fiber in her body was telling her to drop the subject. The answer was going to be more than she could handle. 

"The weather." He dismissed her curiosity as if it was a joke. 

Deva flashed in front of him. He was forced to take her seriously when she jabbed her palm against his chest. He hissed from her not so gentle approach. 

"I dare you to try that again princess." She was still the little brat who had to have things her way. 

"It's queen now, dog." She inched closer. He could feel her breath through his thin shirt. "Tell me what happened. I know there was more motive to your departure." 

His green eyes morphed into a deep rich gold. "You really can't handle the truth right now." 

She took a deep breath to sort her thoughts. "I need to know." 

His right hand came up and combed back her hair. He was looking past her knowing there was no way to avoid this. "You. Deva, you helped me leave." 

Her eyes narrowed. "What?" There was a double meaning to his explanation. 

"You came for me five years ago. You helped me escape." 

She took a step back. "That's impossible. You're lying." She would never betray Darius. 

"I took that memory away from you." He confessed. 

Deva suddenly felt her lungs get caved in by her ribs. They were tightening, closing in. It was getting harder and harder for her to breath once she detected no lie in his voice. He wasn't lying. 

"You were weakening. We both were. Our bond was breaking and dragging us down with it. No matter how hard Darius tried to fill the void it just didn't work. It was starting to feel like hell on earth for both of us." Adamarius could still feel the twinge of his heart bleeding out. 

"I came for you," Deva panted. 

Adamarius nodded. He understood how hard it was for her to grasp the idea and accept it. "It was the middle of the night and to be honest I never expected you to come. Once I had you in my arms everything felt whole again." 

Deva fell back against the wall. She was barely holding herself together. How could she do that to Darius? She wanted it to be a lie. She needed it to be a lie. Fear. Hate. Deception. Regret. Was it fate? Destiny? It was all a horrible game of chance and choice. 

"You were fighting yourself just like you are now. It felt right being with me again yet life for you without Darius was not a life worth living for anymore. You were too attached to him by the time you came for me." Adamarius was never selfish when it came to Deva. He often wondered what his life would be like now if he was. "You were dying inside. Your heart was splitting in two and you didn't want to give up. You didn't want to let go of either of us." 

Deva felt her heart drumming with anxiety. 

"I couldn't make you choose from a fated chance to a destined path. Your life was already set. I made the choice for you so you wouldn't have to." 

Tears trickled down her face involuntarily. "Marius..." the words were caught in her throat. "I have to go." She had to get out of there. The air was thickening. Adamarius couldn't stop her once she sprinted to the exit. 

Her head was more than spinning. It was pounding harder than a hammer hitting a nail into stone. She legs were moving on their own. Her destination was unclear until the second she spotted the kingdom. She needed to see Darius. It was like a magnetic pull navigating her towards him. Deva made it past the thousands of rooms and guards without being seen. She found him in their room staring out to the setting sun. He tensed and shifted once he heard someone enter. 

He blue eyes glossed with relief and confusion. She didn't care. Deva raced into his arms and held on for dear life. How could she betray him? How could she even think about leaving him? It was possible. She couldn't even breathe without him. 

"Deva," he pulled back and examined her face. "What's happened? Are you alright?" 

She shook her head not able to control the massive flow of tears. She was an emotional train wreck and she would like to think it was from the Relic curse.

"I'm sorry," she trembled. "I'm sorry." 

Darius pulled her closer into the embrace, confused as hell. Wasn't he supposed to be the sorry one? "For what my darling? You've done nothing wrong. You're perfect." 

"I'm a horrible person." Would he hate her forever or hold it against her if she told him? "I'm a terrible wife." 

Darius couldn't take the suspense any longer. She was acting more hysterical than usual.

"Deva, my love, what are you talking about?"

Deva couldn't bring herself to say it. Every time she opened her mouth nothing would come out. Darius searched her beautifully pained eyes for some kind of answers. And in them he feared and saw the worst. Anguish. Torture. Betrayal. His vision turned red with blood and vengeance. 

"Adamarius..." the name slipped through his lips like a toxic poison.

Deva blinked back a few tears, enough to see Darius' true vindicated rage. "It's not what you think." There was no reasonable side to it. 

Darius gripped her shoulders with enough force to cage a gorilla. There was no way he was letting her go. "What do you mean?" 

Deva dropped her head and let sobs rock her body. How could she bring herself to tell him?

"I...I am the reason Adamarius escaped, five years ago." She raised her tarnished gaze back up to him. "I was the one who set him free." 

Darius' grip instantly loosened. He felt a blow to the face and his heart. How could she do it to him? "Why?" His voice was haunted with deception. 

"I tried." Her voice cracked. "I tried so hard to suppress it, to suppress him from my mind and my life. I couldn't hold it down because the more I pushed it to the back of my mind the stronger it got. You helped." She traced his features. "I could block it when you're around, when you're there to hold me." 

Darius couldn't help but feel it was partially his fault. He should have tried harder to keep her. 

"There was nothing that could have stopped it. I think Adamarius was right from the beginning. Him and I were made for each other. We were destined to be."

Darius could feel her tearing his heart out. Was she trying to kill him? 

"But then you happened. Darius, you took my heart without me even realizing it and soon you became my air. You're the life that kept me living." 

Her words of endearment were clouding his judgment. She betrayed him. "You went to him. You ran to him because I wasn't enough for you!" 

It was the deadly tip of the dagger slowly plunging into her heart. There was nothing she could say to sooth his anger. "I could not help it." 

The air around them was silent and all that could be heard was the tears rolling down both their cheeks. 

"You would have left me," the realization hit him. 

Deva shook her head. "No. No Darius." But he could see the unsure tension in her eyes. 

Darius clinched his jaw rock hard and bit down his tongue. Blood flew down his throat. "If you want him so badly why are you here?" 

Deva couldn't believe what she was hearing. He was hurt that much was certain but was he already giving up? 

"I won't stand in your way any longer." He turned his back on her. 

Deva felt her body crumble to the floor and electric currents burning from within inside. "Please Darius please don't..." a surge of pain shot up through her spin. Could she really loose him? 

"That's why I wanted to kill him from the beginning. We wouldn't be here right now. He wouldn't be a problem!" Darius gripped the banister. "But I was afraid. I was afraid that once he was gone a part of you would die with him." Darius didn't want to hurt her or even take a chance on it. 

"I wish it wasn't like this. I'd rather die than hurt you." It was the truth. "But he's in my blood too. I can't erase him." 

"Then don't." Darius said through clinched teeth. "Go to him. It's what you need, right?" He was implying she didn't need him anymore. 

She shook her head. She needed him to understand but couldn't open her mouth when a jolt of burning fire flared up her whole body. The excruciating anguish froze her in place. The sun was nearly gone and darkness was replacing its wake. She was running out of time. 

"I tried so hard to free you from him. I thought it was enough. I thought I was enough." His rambling was just a result of his broken heart. 

"Ahhhh," sirens were going off inside her head. They were so loud and prestige, exploding every brain cell she had left. She could also feel the pulsing beast trying to make its way out. She willed herself to stand. 

Darius quickly rushed to her. "Deva," he whispered in concern. 

She couldn't respond. She pushed him back and ran for the door. The blur in her vision forced her to rely on her memory and other senses. The thick essence of woods filled her nostrils and the purple moon made its appearance into the darkness. The drum beats of her heart were threatening to bust out of her chest. The pain was beyond overwhelming. Every fiber in her body was morphing and convincing her to go back and devour Darius with her teeth. The warm blood pulsing through his body was all she could register. The feeling was taking over and Deva took one step towards the castle.  The mouthwatering sensation of vampire blood was the ultimate sin to die for. 

She didn't get to take another step once rough arms engulfed her. "Deva focus," Adamarius soothed. 

She couldn't shake it out. It was burning like hell. "No, no," she chanted. 

Adamarius held her hands and pressed her back against his chest more securely.  "Embrace it Deva. Embrace what you are. Embrace the pain and it will all go away." 

How could that be? The rumbling fire was like acid boiling through her organs. Blotches of her skin was turning into deep blue bruises. The thirst for blood was more intoxicating than life itself. Deva's body rocked with terrible trembles. Adamarius held her as still as he could, locking her with his arms. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep it up. 

"Deva breathe. Let it go. Embrace it. Don't fight it. Let it become a part of you." 

Deva bit her tongue and tasted blood. That was all she wanted. The blood went down like silk. Adamarius yanked her face towards him. He couldn't let her drink herself dry of blood.

"Deva, look at me." Her hunger was strong but she willed her eyes up to his fearful face. "Think of Alcide, think of Darius. They need you." 

Deva shut her thoughts and swallowed the truth. She couldn't be weak. She had to control her urges. Her claws dug into his back and she began to sob. All the pain, all the suffering was finally coming out.