A loud voice blares across the athletic track, counting down. My heart beats in my throat, and all my muscles tighten. 3, 1, 1, start! Immediately I start running, with everything that's in me. This is what I'm good at; it shouldn't be deadly. Two people are running in front of me, and I want to win. Still, I have more to gain in the long run if I don't waste all my energy now. The first lap is done, and with my teeth clenched I run on. Lap two and three go effortlessly, and I begin the fourth lap. I'm about halfway through. My breath sounds louder and louder, overruling the music in my earbuds. Cramping sets in in my right foot, but I absolutely cannot stop. Instead of slowing down, I speed up.

Halfway through the fifth lap, stabbing pains comes into my stomach, and my body screams for a break. I cannot stop, I must not stop. As I start the sixth lap, the ground beneath me gets hot. I catch up to the girl ahead of me, and run as fast as I can away from the flames. Behind me, the track is on fire. The only way out of here is the finish line. I must finish this lap, then I will be safe. Panic swirls through my body, and I fly down the course. I run faster than I've ever run before, leaving the others far behind me. My lower abdomen stings, and my calves burn.

I force myself to take even bigger steps, or I will get burned. A loud scream cuts through the air; the fire has overtaken our group. I refuse to look back, and run on. Another 400 meters, then I am safe. There I can finally rest. I fly down the track, tripping over my feet. A scorching pain shoots through my ankle, and I sink to the ground. Panicked, I push myself up, hobbling as fast as I can to the finish line. The ground is blistering hot, and the fire approaches at lightning speed. Bloodcurdling screams reverberate across the track. Four people catch up to me, and they run across the finish line. Shit, only ten people are allowed to finish in total, and five people have already finished.

Screaming, I step on my ankle, and run as fast as I can. It feels like a monster is gnawing at my ankle, and tears stream down my cheeks. I cannot give up, or I will die. Left and right I am overtaken, and see people finish. Through my tears, I see nine vague figures standing at the line. Only one more person may finish. Screaming, I run on, and see in the corner of my eye the fire approaching. Pure agony drives me, and I run through all the pain, toward the end. Then someone surges past me, running the last ten meters to the finish. "No!" I scream, forcing my tormented body to keep running. It doesn't matter, as soon as the boy steps over the line, the fire flares up at the finish line. I can't get past.

Frightened, I stand still, and spin around panicked. I am surrounded by a wall of fire. People fall to the ground screaming, pulling at their burning clothes and hair. The fire is everywhere. Sobbing, I sink to the ground, clutching my ankle. It's done, I've lost in a race I should have easily won. Almost curiously, I look at the fire nibbling at my clothes. This doesn't hurt so much. Then it touches my skin, and I scream. I set off running, away from the pain. But the pain doesn't go away, and follows me everywhere I go. Screaming, I stagger, and fall into the fire.

I bolt upright, and my chest rises and falls rapidly. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in that I'm in bed, and not burned. I had a nightmare, just a nightmare. I knock the sweaty blanket off me, and sit up. With my arms wrapped around my knees, I rock back and forth. The panic I felt so clearly a moment ago slowly ebbs away. The dream seemed so real. Mira turns around. 'Are you okay?' she mumbles sleepily, squeezing her eyes shut. 'Yeah, just had a nightmare, that's all,' I mutter, leaning my head on my knees. She rubs her eyes, and sits up. The red marks on her skin are gone, only the scratches caused by her nails show.

'What was it about?' I shrug. She looks at me inquiringly. 'Fire, something about games, and fire.' She frowns, and puts her hand on my knee. It remains silent for a few minutes. 'Are we going to die?' she whispers then. How am I supposed to answer that. We probably are, but that's the least calming fact I can tell. 'No, of course not sweetie. We've still have each other, right? I'm going to protect you, and Levi is going to help you as well. And you'll help him back, that way we're a team. And you know what they say about a team, right?' Mira nods. 'You're stronger together than alone,' she murmurs. 

Yet she doesn't seem convinced. 'And what if you are not there? Am I going to die then? You weren't there in the locker room, and couldn't help me. I was all on my own Ash.' Her lip quivers, and she turns her face away from me. I fall silent. I can't promise her I'll always be there. There's a big possibility that I'll be dead this week. Still, I have to reassure her. 'There will always be people to help you. And you will be able to do a lot yourself.' She grimaces. 'Not enough apparently. Otherwise I wouldn't have to play that game today.'

Startled, I look at her. 'How do you know that? You were asleep during the announcement, weren't you?' She shakes her head. 'I woke up to someone bumping her head, and very happy to be in the top twenty. From then on I watched the announcement. I'm not surprised to be in the bottom twenty.'

I suppress a smile. 'That girl is Li, you'll meet her later. I think you'll like her.' Mira shrugs, and gets back under the blanket. 'Would you miss me if I die today?' With wide eyes, I look at the back of her head. From surprise I can hardly say anything. 'Of course Mira, I love you so much. I could lose everything, really fucking everything. But not you. That's why you're not going to die in that game later. You know I love you right.'

She hums a little, then turns around. 'You know it doesn't work like that.' I suppress any guilt. 'It does now, I promise.' There are tears in her big blue eyes. 'I'm scared, Ash. I don't want to die yet.' I shake my head, and lie down next to her. 'You won't die tomorrow, I promise.' She closes her eyes, and smiles briefly. 'You make a lot of promises that you cannot keep. I'll kill you if you lie.' Laughing softly, I pull the blanket further over us. 'You realize you'll be dead by then, right?' Mira frowns. 'Then I'll come haunt you.' 'It's a deal.' It remains silent for a few minutes. 'I love you, too, Ash,' she then whispers. The corners of my mouth curl up, and I stare at the empty bed above me.

After ten minutes, I hear her snoring softly, and am sure she's asleep. I can only hope she won't die today. The only positive thing is that she is with bottom twenty there, and so hopefully not too dangerous people. At the idea that she will die today my chest tightens. Hopefully Levi will help her, but I can't assume that. They haven't known each other that long. The first game is often based on chance. I can only hope that fate will favor her. I don't want to lose her, I wouldn't know what to do without her. She is my little sister, and I want to be able to tease her for a very long time.

I must and will get her back home safely. I promised Dad to bring her back, and I promised her to bake pancakes at home. She can't die yet. She is far too young. Still, in a few hours she will have to participate in a deadly game. I turn my head, studying her. Her face is relaxed. Her blond hair falls past her head. It is bizarre to think of us lying here, in this dormitory. Last night we were still in our own beds, and I threw a pillow at her head because she snored.

Her mouth hangs open a little, and her lips are dry. Her eyes closed, with long eyelashes clinging together. The small freckle above her left eyebrow. Her bottom lip slightly larger than her top lip. Her little button nose, and the little hairs between her eyebrows. I save every little detail of her face while I still can. What if she's gone tomorrow, then I'll never be able to see her again. Then her chest will never again rise and fall quietly, and all the blush will be gone from her cheeks.

A tear falls from the corner of my eye, and I let it. The first time I saw her, she had just been born. I ran toward her crib, but was too small to see into it. Rose lifted me up, and curiously I looked inside. A tiny crumpled baby lay sleeping quietly. That's all I can remember of it; I was too young to remember more. I was three, and Rose seven. We were all little kids.

The corners of my mouth curl up at the thought of the time she swallowed a battery. Together with Mom we went to the doctor, and she clasped my hand really hard, so afraid for the docter. It's just a stupid memory, but it makes me feel warm inside. Smiling, I let the memories pass by. When she managed to ride her bike for the first time, she swung in all directions. She named her bike Rebel, and pretended her bike was a horse. Our first real fight, when she destroyed my favorite toy. At the end of the day, she had a drawing tucked under my pillow, with a drawing of my stuffed animal on it. When we had made a cake for Mother's Day, but had accidentally switched the sugar with salt. That was the worst cake I have ever tasted.

Or when I had my first boyfriend, and Mira caught my first kiss. Oh, I wanted to kill her at the time. When she came to me crying because we were feeding ducks and a goose had bitten her. When we had decided together to cut our hair with the blunt kitchen scissors. I have never seen Mom so angry.

We were so young and innocent, and real life seemed so far away. Real life has now caught up with us, slapping us both in the face. I fear what is yet to come, and what already has happened. Even if Mira made it out of the race alive, would she want to live at all? Is it even possible to live after seeing and experiencing so many terrible things? She is already permanently damaged, and we haven't even been here for a full day. Worried, I slide further under the blanket. I need to try to sleep, or I'll be exhausted tomorrow, and tomorrow I need to be there for Mira.

After twenty minutes, I am fed up, and slide out from under the blanket. My bladder is screaming, and my head is wide awake. The floor is cold for my bare feet, so I put on my shoes. I walk down the hall, and push open the door to the girls' restroom. My pee splashes loudly in the silence, and then I flush. At the sinks, I wash my hands, startled by my reflection in the mirror. My makeup is smeared all over my face, and I have red marks around my eyes from crying. With wipes I scrub my face clean, until the last traces of mascara are gone. My whole face tingles.

With quiet steps, I walk down the hall. Everyone is asleep, the only noise is snoring, and here and there sobbing. I catch Rim's gaze, and look down shyly. He is sitting upright, leaning against his bed frame. Just before I reach my bed, I glance at him again. He gestures for me to come to him. Surprised, I point to myself. He nods. I hesitate, should I? Mira is afraid to be alone, and I like staying with her. On the other hand, I can't sleep anyway, and can still see her just fine from his bed. My curiosity about this boy wins out over doubt, and I walk over to his bunk, number 1. He smiles, and waves.

I climb the steps, until I end up by his bed. Uncomfortably, I sit down at the foot of the bed. He grins, and holds out his hand. Surprised, I take it, and shake it. His handshake feels warm and firm. 'Hi, I'm Rim. Nice to meet you.' I smile, feeling my cheeks redden under his friendly gaze. 'I'm Ashley, but everyone calls me Ash, also nice to meet you.' He nods slowly, studying me. 'Why are you still awake?' he asks, and sits up in a cross-legged position. I shrug. 'Couldn't sleep.'

He chuckles. 'Honestly, I don't understand how people can sleep in this place. You'd expect the lights to be off at night, but it looks like day here.' Surprised, I look at him, then see that he is joking. The light is indeed on all the time, but the reason we're both awake lies elsewhere. 'Indeed. I was just so looking forward to a good night's sleep, in this fantastic place.' Rim grins. 'There's such a nice atmosphere here, too. Everyone is so relaxed and cheerful, really enjoying themselves.' I relax a little, and smile. 'Then why can't you sleep?' His smile disappears, and he taps his knees with his fingers. 'Besides the light being too bright? Maybe the high probability of my death plays a small part.'

'Are you scared?' He shakes his head. 'Scared? No. I'm not scared, I'm never scared. But I do fear the future or something like that. You know?' I nod, wrapping my arms around my knees. I blow a fuzz off the sweatpants. 'You are the girl whose sister got drawn as well, aren't you?' he asks curiously, looking at me with inquisitive eyes. I grimace, and nod, 'Yep, that's me.' He whistles between his teeth. 'Then you sure hit the jackpot, jeez. You guys are so screwed.' Surprised, I look up, and chuckle. 'You can put it that way. But true, Mira and I aren't exactly lucky.'

'Does she have to compete tomorrow?' Boy, what a questions he asks. I sigh, and look in Mira's direction. She's still in bed, and seems deeply asleep. 'Yes, and so is the boy we're hanging out with. They're both 12, and it's honestly so sad. I've only just met Levi, but he really is a sweetheart. Mira is my sister, of course. They both don't deserve to die tomorrow.' Rim shakes his head, looking sympathetic. 'That's kinda the thing about this contest. Nobody here deserves to die.' 

'According to the mayor, it does,' I mutter. Rim laughs, shrugging his shoulders. 'So what? That man is insane. It's not okay to judge people, and throw them into a contest so that the weak citizens are eliminated, is it? What kind of sick person comes up with that.' Now it's my turn to shrug my shoulders. 'Well, can't do anything about it.' Rim rolls his eyes. 'Do you give up so easily?' I give him a side eye.

'What did you have in mind then? That we could change the system?' He thinks for a moment, running his hand through his hair. 'Maybe, but we can also rebel on a small scale. Without immediate drastic changes and stuff.' Curious, I look at him. 'Well look, you understand that there's a deeper layer underneath these games, right?' I nod slowly. 'And that revolves entirely around control. The mayor controls all of us, by putting us in this game. He assumes we'll play everything by his rules, but when you don't, you disrupt control. That's how you can stand against him.' I frown, not quite following him. 'But how are you supposed to do that? Running in a different direction than everyone else won't change anything.'

Rim chuckles, shaking his head. 'No, that's right, but that's not what I mean either. I mean you shouldn't let the games change you. You have to keep your morals sharp, and keep believing in them, and keep acting on them. Because of those games, we will probably have to do terrible things, and because of that, the mayor has the chance to call us monsters, and therefore do the draw again next year, because the monsters haven't been eliminated yet. If you make sure you don't become monsters, he'll look more and more unbelievable with his games, and he'll have to quit eventually.'

Impressed, I look at Rim. 'You've thought this through.' He nods, and stretches. 'What's your moral?' I ask. His whole story is appealing, but unachievable. If you're forced into something, you can't escape your fate. Then just be a monster. 'I've never killed anyone, well, maybe a few flies, but besides that I'd like to keep it that way.' I crunch my fingers, resting my head on my knees. 'But that might be why you shouldn't want to survive this contest in the first place. Otherwise you will have ninety deaths on your hands,' he mutters. Surprised, I look at him.

'You realize it's not our fault we're here, right? We didn't choose to be drawn, and we don't choose to kill people. Yet in the future we may have to. To save yourself, or to save people you love. I would kill everyone in this room to protect Mira, but that doesn't make me a monster. That makes me human.' Rim remains silent for a long time, looking at me inquiringly. 'Wouldn't you feel guilt, at the end of the games?' he asks after a while. I shrug. 'You have the rest of your life to work on that guilt. I couldn't live with myself if Mira dies because I didn't protect her. I guess I could live if I removed all the obstacles that stand in the way of Mira's life.'

Rim laughs softly, shaking his head in disbelief. 'You're someone to watch out for, Ash. But I do admire that. At least you've got guts.' The corners of my mouth pull up, and I smile. 'You need to watch out, really. Almost everyone here in the room would kill you without a flinch. Not everyone believes in pretty stories, and happy endings.' Rim makes a protesting sound. 'My moral is not a pretty story, it gives me a life purpose.'

I look at him slanted. 'What good are morals if no one else believes in them?' Rim frowns. 'What kind of person are you if you start the game without morals? A monster, like the mayor wants you to be?' 'Human.' He raises his arms in the air, laughing. 'I don't think we're going to agree, but I don't care. I'll be a little careful, and not too gullible, if you don't murder the entire dormitory tonight.' I chuckle, and stretch my legs. They dangle over the edge of the bed. 'I promise.'

He pretends to wipe the sweat from his forehead. 'Phew, I was getting scared.' I look at him teasingly. 'Didn't you say half an hour ago that you were never scared?' He grins, shrugging his shoulders. 'You're pretty terrifying though. I'd be crazy not to be scared by that.' I smile, feeling my cheeks turn red. I look at the clock, startled. It's three in the morning. 'Maybe I should go back to bed, or I won't sleep at all tonight.' Rim nods in agreement, making room with his blanket by the stairs so I can reach it properly. 'Good to get to know you, Ash. Hope to see you soon.' 

I quickly climb down the ladder so he doesn't see my red face. 'See you soon.'  I skip the last step, and jump to the ground. Why did I say see you soon. Am I going to see him soon? Do I want to see him soon? And why do I like it that he wants to see me again? I rush to my bed, and slide under the blanket next to Mira. She moves around, and groans something unintelligible, then sleeps again. With an unexplainable smile on my face, I fall asleep.

Hiii, I'm sorry for being slow with the updates. I'm not home right now, and don't have access to my computer. As soon as I'm back, more chapters will follow.