Manchester, United Kingdom.
November, Autumn 2014

..

I never really did like cold. Though I live in Europe, I wish I can live somewhere warmer. Maybe tropical. Like Indonesia or Brazil. Cold is not really my thing.

I walk through the busy life of Manchester, wanting to walk from the training ground to wherever my feet are dragging me.

I left my bag in my car, which again I left on the training ground.

I feel like walking, needing to be alone and away from everything.

I actually know this park not far from the training ground, I guess that's where I'm heading to.

As I walk, I observe this perticular, bizzare world.

Wherever you look, you'll find yourself staring at someone who has their phone stuck to their face. Have gadgets really invaded this world?

Teenagers who then socialize with each other are now talking through their phone.

Couples who then only hold each other's hands are now sucking each other's face on the street.

What a nonsesical life we have.

I shake my head as I walk pass an 8 year old kid who was playing Candy Crush on his iPad.

Modern gadgets these days.

When a familiar park come to a view, I grin.

There are actually children here still playing with their friends and not busy with gadgets.

I find my usual bench occupied by a young Asian lady, who looks remarkably familiar and quite spot on if you ask me, but I decide to sit on it because it's my favourite spot to sit.

She's reading a book with earplugs on, busy in her own world and I with my own.

I feel my phone vibrates in my pocket. I sigh. Can't I have a quiet alone time for just a moment?

I fish out my phone and see that I got a text from Jovetić.

Even though he's Montenegrin and me being Bosnian, we are actually a close friends.

STEVAN: Where the hell are you?
EDIN: Somewhere
STEVAN: But your car is still here!
EDIN: I walk, so what?
STEVAN: You scared me there. . I thought you were kinapped or somethin'
EDIN: Well I can assure you that I am pefectly fine and not being kidnap by some lunatic.
STEVAN: Good. Where are you then?
EDIN: I told you.
EDIN: Somewhere.
STEVAN: And where is this 'somewhere'?
EDIN: It's in where I want to be alone place.
STEVAN: Are you still mad that Nastasić got that new receptionist's attention?
EDIN: What? No! I just want to be alone, that's all.
STEVAN: Hmmhmm, keep telling yourself that, Džeko.
EDIN: Whatever. . Just don't disturb me. I'm on my 'Edin Džeko' time.
STEVAN: There is no 'Edin Džeko' time
EDIN: Yes, there is. For me. Just hush and let me be.
STEVAN: Fine

I lock my phone and put back inside my pocket.

Then I realize that there's an additional person on my bench.

He (yes he) is talking to the young woman.

"― just saying that you should talk to him." The guy says, his tone is somehow persistence.

"No, Sam," The young woman says with a stern tone yet has manage to add some gentleness into it. "I don't want to. I think I'm falling for him and I'm afraid."

"You're always afraid of falling in love, why?" My God, I know it's wrong to eavesdrop but it's just hard not to when it's starting to change into an argument.

"I don't want the same thing to happen just like what happened to him and I―"

"Who? Džeko?"

Now my ears are all strain and perk, cautiously hearing everthing they were talking about. The guy just said my name, for the love of God. Now I'm really eavesdropping on them.

"Yes."

Maybe it's. . Is she? Is it her? Could it be her?

I crain my neck just enough to look at her face and yes. It's her. Iliana Sperbund. The used to be sixteen year old who left me with broken heart.

The used to be sixteen year old who was my everything.

"It's been a long time," The guy says, a clear annoyance is in his tone. "Juan loves you."

Juan as in Juan Mata? What the hell is happening?

"But I can't," Iliana's tone is shaky and I hate to admit this but I am on the edge of puching the guy to shut up and leave her alone.

"Did you tell Juan that it's just a 'dare', just like you said to every guy ever dated?"

"Y-yes," She stutters, avoiding eye contact with the guy.

She's afraid of falling in love?

"Iliana, you broke too many poor deluled souls. It's time to change that and be happy with someone."

"But," She stutters again, turning quickly to look at the guy, "I'm still in love with Edin!"

My heart seems to stop for a while as I register what she had just said.

She's still in love with me?

"Forget him!" The guy suddenly exclaims, startling both Iliana and me. And how dare he? Who does he think he is? Forgetting Edin Džeko? That's impossible. "It's been, like, 9 years?"

"So?" Iliana asks incredulously, slamming her book shut with a surprising hard power.

"So," The guy says, matching his tone as hers, "Forget him, move on. Juan freakin' Mata is freakin' in love with you. And don't you dare object it, I know you're falling for him too."

Is this even real? Really? Juan Mata?

"But―"

"Just go to him," The guy's tone suddenly turns gentle, "He needs you. You need him."

There's a pause, where I can hear my own heart beat accelerating and hear Iliana's hitched breaths.

"Fine!" She blurts out, waving her hands in the air then drops them back on her lap. "Fine."

"Go," The guy insits, nodding towards the exit.

Iliana stands up and half jogs towards the exit when she stops suddenly and turns to her friend and says, "Thank you, Sam."

"You're welcome!" He shouts back and I bet you that my ear drum is going to explode if he shouts again.

She turns around and presume on walking, exiting the park and out of my view.

I stay there, sitting, engulf with my thoughts, not even realizing that the Sam guy is walking away.

And once again, I am left alone.

So was my love for her a blunder or was it the fact that I let her go that's a blunder?

_____________________

[not edited]

another story finished

yes..

which left me with 'Polaroid Pictures' (it's on hold) and 'Winter in London' (my new fic, which is a poldi fic so check it out :D)

i'll try to finish both stories

thanks for reading this fic, i really appreciate it :)

(sorry for the shitty ending)

au revoir

- Maria