(a/n: I write this chapter with the heaviest heart. I'm one of those people that say they're gonna let someone go and never do, I make excuses for them. But today I let go of the girl I could've sworn I loved.. And it hurts.. Also don't hate me, please)

Clarke sat in her bed, with her knees pressed against her chest, angry tears streaming down her face. She couldn't believe it, not only was the man she loved cheating on her the entire time but her best friend tried to keep it from
her.

Sobs raked her entire body and the light in her phone wouldn't stop going off.

Lexa, Octavia, Lexa, Octavia, octavia , octavia octavia.

The missed calls wouldn't stop appearing on her phone.. She let them all ring out.

Her mind wasn't with her Body. Her soul managed to float above her. She wasn't herself. The anger didn't allow her to be. Months crying over her father, but mostly over Finn. She let him die, she was so focused on saving her father that was already dead.. She ignored the cries of Finn. She beat herself up for months. But now, a side of her was so glad, so glad she let him rot.

Her phone rung once more, Lexa... She threw the phone towards the wall, smashing it. She knew it wasn't her fault, but she wasn't thinking clearly..

Clarke changed out of her clothes and went to pour herself a glass of wine. Something told her to turn on the tv.

A documentary was on, and Clarke wanted to take her mind off of her anger.. Sitting down in front of the tv she took small sip.

Octavia was always there for her, but Clarke always protected her, not the other way around. Octavia was a sheltered girl who barely knew the harsh ways of the world before she met Clarke. And she tried to keep her that way. So maybe she couldn't blame Octavia for thinking keeping this from her was a better idea. But it still hurt that she rather her live with that pain, the other.

Clarke's shattered phone lit up once more, and as she got up, finally deciding she would answer.. The documentary was interrupted by a news segment.

Famous author and screenwriter Lexa Woods and veterinarian Doctor Raven Reyes were in a car accident on the George Washington bridge. Details yet to be disclosed but it seems to be a one party crash, more information coming to you tonight.

Clarke's face paled. All anger no longer with her.. Lexa, Raven, car accident.

The only words her brain processed and the ones that hit her hardest. Why were they out driving this late. Where they coming to see Clarke. Questions filled her alcohol consumed mind as she searched for her broken phone to call a taxi. She slipped the first pair of shoes that she found and made her way down the steps of her apartment.

Her mind, numb.. Her legs moved aimlessly. She hopped in the taxi and almost forgot to tell him the address.

All she could think about was how she would never forgive herself if something happened to them. Something about the situation pushed a sense of guilt into her vulnerable mind.

If Clarke had never left, maybe they wouldn't of either. If Clarke hadn't of left maybe she could have stopped them. Every scenario she ran through made her feel guiltier.

They were fine, they were great 10 hours ago.. And now all of this.. An earthquake of pain and guilt shook the foundation of their new found friendship. But that was because they were all damaged goods in their own way. Each girl had their own piece of the past they couldn't let go of..

The thought of Lexa and Raven in trouble shook Clarke out of her anger so easily.. Because she'd already been through this.. The pain of hoping your love will awake from the harsh impact of the car ahead. The hoping it's all a dream and that you'll wake up next to the love of your life.

In the short time they new each other Clarke felt something for Lexa she's never felt before. She felt something she didn't have with Finn. And that was a sense of peace, of security, safety. She couldn't loose that just yet.

Clarke reached the hospital and despite her need to know how the girls were, politely asked the lady at the front desk.. She didn't want to make a scene and she didn't want to be kicked out, but she'd lie and say she was family if she had to.

Luckily it didn't come to that. "They are both in floor 8, no one is allowed to see them yet, but you can wait in the waiting room like everyone else" the secretary said.. And only then did Clarke remember their family was here as well.

The elevator ride felt like an eternity, Clarke prepared herself for the dirty looks she'd get from Lexa's family, for Lexa wrapped in bandages, frail, broken.

But the elevator doors opened and Lexa was by the waiting room. Being restrained by 2 doctors, thrashing around demanding to see her best friend. Her clothes were covered in blood and she had a gaping scratch on the side of her head...

"Let me go! That's my sister in there! LET ME GO! I need to see her, I HAVE TO!" Lexa yelled. Her uncle standing behind her, trying to take her away by the waist.

Echoes eyes caught Clarke's as she walked closer to her. "Dad" she tried to get Gustus's attention.

He turned around, a restless Lexa still moving away from his hold, to see Clarke, tears streaming down her face, worried.

"Clarke, help me, please" he said just as Lexa through her leg back and it collided with one of his knees.

Clarke rushed over, to get in the girls line of sight, she'd never seen the girl like this. Her face contorted into one of pure anger. Trying to get out of the grasp of her uncle and the 2 security guards.

"If you don't relax were gonna have to ask you to leave" one of the security guards declared. Lexa wouldn't stop trying to evade their hold.

Clarke moved closer, putting one hand on each side of the girls face.. Making her look at her.

"Lexa.." Clarke tried to get her attention.

But the anger wasn't letting Lexa see Clarke, the distance between her and her dying best friend was causing her to loose focus. She needed to be with her. She had to be with her or else she wouldn't forgive her for putting them in this mess in the first place.

"Lexa.. Please. Look at me, see me" Clarke tried again. The girls eyes bore holes into Clarke's blue eyes.. But nothing. Clarke couldn't see the light the girl usually carried.

"You guys can let her go, me and her uncle got this.. She won't be a problem anymore, I'm sorry" Clarke said to the guards. They nodded and slowly let her go.

Lexa tried to dash towards Ravens room but Clarke held the girl in her arms tightly. "Lexa it's me Clarke.. I'm here. Please calm down"

The door to Ravens room opened as her doctor came out and Lexa caught a glimpse of her best friend, with tubes down her throat, both legs held up but straps.

Lexa's legs gave out, her features softened at the sight before her. Clarke tried to support Lexa but they both ended up kneeling on the ground. The brunettes tears streamed down her face freely.

Clarke moved the girls hair from her face, trying to soothe her. "It's okay, I'm here, everything's gonna be okay" Clarke said but she didn't even believe herself.

"It's my fault it-it's all my fault she tried to warn me, she told me the car was coming and I just-" sobs shook her thin frame and she dug her head into the crook of Clarke neck.

"Shh, let it out" Clarke comforted her, with tears of her own falling down her face.

They were like this for a while, till Lexa's head began to hurt.

They moved to a couch, beside uncle Gustus, Clarke sat and Lexa layer her head atop the girls lap.

Clarke ran her fingers through the girls hair as she stared at a blank wall.

"We're gonna need to get that checked out you know" she said, looking at the scar on the girls gash on the girls face and neck.
"I refused treatment till they told me what was happening with Raven" Lexa mumbled. Clarke nodded, knowing the girl was set In her ways and there was nothing she was gonna be able to do, to get her help.
"Wanna tell me what happened" Clarke asked, because the details of how they ended up in a hospital after such a big fight, still weren't adding up.

Lexa turned her head to look up at Clarke. "When we fight, we like to go out for a drive.. And I guess I thought it was a good idea. I made a wrong turn onto the highway, and didn't even realize until it was too late, I was so mad at her i didn't even let her talk, she was trying to warn me we were about the other car, but i didn't see it till last minute. I just ignored her, I thought she was trying to make excuses-" Clarke cut her off. "Lexa don't blame yourself"she started to say but Lexa wouldn't accept it.

"No Clarke, it is my fault, I wasn't in my right mind and I took her out for a drive and I ignored her when she warned me.. The other car got away without a scratch! And my best friend is here dying on a hospital bed, while I'm fine! It's not fair! " she explained, her head pounding with every word she yelled.

An idea, a very bad one at that, came to Clarke's mind. "I'll fix this okay, just.. Please don't blame yourself yet.

Clarke took off her jacket and handed it to Lexa, who was getting dizzy from the lack of blood.

She needed to do something fast, so she dialed the one person.. She knew could help.

"Mommy?" She said when she head the click on the other side of the phone. She knew she sounded like a lost child but that's exactly what she felt like.. She didn't know what to do, all she could think about was running into the arms of the woman/doctor who birthed her.

"C-Clarke?" Her mothers shocked tone was evident. The if it wasn't under such horrible circumstances she would of laughed.
"'Mom I need your help" she explained. And that's all Abby Griffin needed to hear, to run to her estranged daughters rescue.

(I know this ones short, I'm sorry!)