Lauren was lounged sleepily on the sofa when there was a knock on her door.

She huffed, knowing her parents were out and she'd have to answer the door. She opened the door and before she could react there was a set of arms wrapped around her waist.

"Camila?" Lauren mumbled in confusion, bringing one hand up to wrap around Camila's shoulder and the other move to stroke her hair as Camila hid her face in Lauren's neck. "Sweetheart, what's the matter?"

"I can't handle it anymore."

"What? What can't you handle?"

"I don't wanna be sad anymore. I wanna take this feeling that you make me feel and go with it but there's that voice in the back of my mind telling me that I don't deserve to be happy because my mom doesn't have that chance anymore."

"Baby, you're mom dying wasn't your fault." Lauren stressed, her chest tightening when Camila sobbed against her neck. "You're weren't driving, ok? You were fourteen and she was trapped in a three thousand pound car, there was nothing you could've done."

"I should've tried harder."

"You think this is what your mom would've wanted?" Lauren asked, pulling back and cupping Camila's face with her hands. "She wouldn't want you to be doing this to yourself or this." Lauren rolled up Camila's sleeve, tears springing to her eyes when she noticed a fresh wound. "She would want you to be happy." Lauren said, her voice cracking slightly.

"I can't be happy. I don't deserve to be."

"Of course you do." Lauren said, pulling Camila back into another hug. "Please believe me when I say you deserve to be happy. You deserve everything you've ever wanted and I might not be able to give you that but someone will."

"Why are you crying?" Camila whispered against Lauren's neck.

"I hate seeing you hurt yourself." Lauren croaked, lightly closing the door with her foot. "I hate that you think you don't deserve happiness."

"Can I please stay here tonight? I can't deal with everyone in my house right now. I need you, I need your stupid sense of humor and the fact that you don't think about what you say around me."

"Of course you can, sweetheart." Lauren whispered against the side of Camila's head. "I'll need to text Ally, though. Tell her you're here."

"I know."

Lauren nodded, pulling back and looking down at Camila.

"I'm sorry." Camila mumbled quietly, using the pad of her thumb to wipe the tears from Lauren's cheeks. "The last thing I wanted was to make you sad."

"You make me happy." Lauren corrected. "I'm just sad about how you treat yourself."

"I make you happy?" Camila asked with a frown.

Lauren nodded. "Really happy, actually."

"You make me happy too, happier than those pills do."

"Are you comparing me to pills, wow, you know how to make a girl feel special."

"Just call me Casanova."

Lauren laughed, nodding to the sofa where she had created her own fortress of pillows and a duvet. "Would you like to enter my castle, me lady?"

"You're a loser." Camila said as she followed Lauren over to the sofa and sat down.

"Get comfortable, we're watching Friday the Thirteenth."

"Love these movies." Camila said.

Lauren held up the covers to Camila, the younger girl took them and settled into Lauren's side.

Lauren pressed play on the DVD player and slid down in her seat just enough to be at the right lever for Camila to rest her head to her shoulder if she wanted too.

It took Camila about ten minutes to finally working up the courage to lean her head in Lauren's shoulder. "I heard you on Saturday." Camila whispered.

"Doing what?" Lauren mumbled, turning her head towards Camila but her eyes remained on the TV.

"Arguing with Ally."

"Ah, yeah she's crazy sometimes. Sorry."

"Did you mean what you said?"

"Which part?"

"Well, you told her I mean a lot to you. Did you mean it?"

"Of course." Lauren answered softly, looking down at Camila. "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't."

Camila nodded, turning her eyes back to the TV.

"Why? Do you want to mean a lot to me?"

"Well it would only be fair since you mean so much to me." Camila muttered, keeping her eyes on the TV.

Lauren smiled, picking up her phone and typing out a text to Ally.

'Camila showed up here, she's spending the night. I'll bring her home before school tomorrow.'

'Thank you.'

Lauren threw her phone onto the sofa next to her and got more comfortable. She leant her head on top of Camila's and lightly grabbed into her arms, slipping her thumb under the sleeve and running over the fresh cut.

"How long have you been doing it?"

"I started about six months after my mom died."

"And you just do it here?" Lauren asked, sliding Camila's sleeve up and looking over her arm.

"You're full of questions today, huh?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just curious, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"You're not I'm just not used to people asked me this kind of stuff."

"So you don't mind?"

"No."

"Is this the only place?"

"No," Camila whispered. "On my stomach and thighs too."

"Can I see the ones on your stomach?"

"No. They're disgusting."

"That's not true." Lauren argued, pulling back to look down at Camila. "You're beautiful, scars and all."

"You're just saying that."

"I'm not." Lauren assured. "When I first met you I thought you were the most beautiful person I'd ever seen and now I still think you're the most beautiful, and now bravest, person I've ever met."

"Brave?" Camila huffed like it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. "I do this to myself, how is that brave."

"But you're still here today and I'm proud of you for that."

Camila stared up at Lauren like she was about to burst into tears, and she did, wrapping her arms around Lauren's neck and crying against her shoulder.

"Jesus shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't."

"Then why are you crying, numbnuts?" Lauren teased, pulling back and placing her hands on Camila's cheeks.

"I just- I didn't think anyone would ever say stuff like that to me, with me being crazy and all, but you just say all the right things."

"You're not crazy and I'm just telling you what I see. These," Lauren took a hold of Camila's arm and nodded down at the scars. "Are not horrible or disgusting, understand?"

"But..."

"No buts or what if or anything!" Lauren demanded, bringing Camila's arm up to her lips and kissing her scared skins.

As Lauren looked back up at Camila the younger girl placing her hand on Lauren's cheek and pulled her into a kiss.

At first Lauren was shocked, who wouldn't be? It came out of nowhere, and was about to kiss back when Camila pulled back, shaking her head lightly. "Sorry, I shouldn't have..." Camila mumbled, getting off the sofa and mumbled to herself as she walked towards the door.

"Hey, stop. Where are you going?"

"I shouldn't have done that. Of course you don't like me that way, who would? I mean I would just bring you down. Make you depressed." Camila rambled quickly, more like she was talking to herself instead of Lauren.

Lauren got up and lightly held onto Camila's waist, backing her up until her back was against the door. "Tell me how someone who makes me incredible happy could ever make me depressed?"

"You don't have stick around just because you think I'll have a break down or something."

Lauren sighed, leaning forward and taking Camila's bottom lip between hers. "That's not why I'm here." Lauren whispered against Camila's lips. "I'm here because I like you, a lot, I enjoy spending time with you and if this is what you want then that's great."

"You mean us?"

"I mean me being able to do this," Lauren placed a kiss on Camila's nose making her scrunch up her nose and smile. "Whenever I want. You're perfect, I would be lucky to have you."

"What would Ally say?"

"I don't care." Lauren assured. "I want to take you out on a date, if that's what you want."

"It is." Camila agreed and Lauren smiled.

"Great. Awesome, I'll sort that you but, for now, let's go finish watching the movie and then go to bed."

Camila nodded, following Lauren back over to sofa.

Both girls sat down on the sofa, Lauren pulling Camila towards her and wrapping both arms around her.

Camila jumped when the front door opened but Lauren didn't react, she knew her parents were due home soon.

"Hey, Lauren. You didn't say you were having a friend over."

"Yeah, it was kind of last minute, dad. This is Camila. Camila this is mom and dad."

"Nice to meet you, Camila."

"You too sir. Ma'am." Camila muttered quietly.

"We're going to bed, don't be up to late, you both have school tomorrow."

"Sure thing, mom."

"Night girls."

"Goodnight." Lauren mumbled, lightly running her fingertips up and down Camila's arm.

"I forgot it was a school night. Sorry."

"It doesn't matter if it's a school night or not. I'm here for you any day, any hour." Lauren whispered, looking down at Camila.

Camila smiled, resting her head against Lauren's shoulder.

The girls finished watching the movie and Lauren turned off the TV, grabbing the duvet and pillows before fumbling up the stairs.

"I'll get you something to wear." Lauren said, turning to her dresser and pulling out a Miami Dolphins jersey that would be way too large for Camila and a pair of sleep shorts.

She handed Camila the clothes but stopped short when she remember what Camila had said about her thighs. "You want sweats?"

"No, you've already saw my arms, what difference could it really make?" Camila mumbled and began walking into Lauren's joined bathroom.

Lauren quickly got changed and fixed her bed before sitting down and waiting for Camila.

After about five minutes Lauren got restless and stood up, walking over to the bathroom door. "Cam, you alright?"

"Uh, c-can I actually get a pair of sweats?"

Lauren leant her head against the door. "Can I come in?"

"I-I..."

"It's ok. I just want to see it you're ok, I won't look if you don't want me too."

"O-ok."

Lauren slowly opened the door and slid inside, looking Camila, who was leaning against the counter, square in the eye.

"What's the matter, baby?" Lauren asked, walking over to Camila and standing directly in front of her, her face a few inches from Camila's.

"I just- I don't like it. It's just horrible."

Lauren cupped Camila's cheeks with her hands. "Can I?" Lauren nodded down towards Camila's legs.

Camila looked unsure at first but nodded after a couple of seconds and Lauren stepped back half a step and look down at Camila's thighs.

Only about half of her thigh was visible but Lauren could see the scars there.

"You actually have really nice legs." Lauren said as she rolled her eyes down the rest of Camila's legs. "You don't have to hide anything from me, alright? Nothing will ever change how I feel about you. You know, unless you're a Cowboys fan then, yes, please keep that to yourself."

"They just make me feel disgusting. Ugly."

"I really wish you could see yourself how I see you." Lauren mumbled, looking down at Camila. "How unbelievable beautiful you are. How brave and amazing you are. It doesn't matter to me that you've cut yourself or that you're on medication, you're perfect to me."

"You have to stop."

"Stop what?" Lauren frowned in confusion, wrapping her arms around Camila's waist.

Camila sighed, gripping on Lauren's shirt and leaning her ear against Lauren's chest. "I don't want to end up needing you, if you get me?"

"Why not?" Lauren asked, resting her chin on Camila's head.

"Because it's not good to rely on people. They leave you and then you're left feeling lost."

"I'm not going to leave you. As long as you want me in your life I will be in your life, Camila."

"Can we just go to bed, I'm exhausted."

"Sure, love." Lauren agreed, leaving the bathroom and opening the bedroom window in an attempt to me the room a little less stuffy.

"It's so warm." Camila groaned, seemingly back to herself, as she laid down on her back on top on the duvet.

"I know." Lauren huffed, lying down on her side, probing her head up on her fist.

Camila let her head roll to the side, smiling up at Lauren.

Lauren smiled back, letting her eyes dance around Camila's face, taking in all of her features.

"What?" Camila asked when she noticed the look on Lauren's face.

"Nothing."

"You were staring at me like you want to have me for lunch."

"That would be a good lunch." Lauren agreed, nodding lightly.

"What're we going to do tomorrow?" Camila asked, lightly playing with Lauren's fingers.

"What do you wanna do?"

"Well, if you don't think Ally would mind us then maybe we should just come out."

"No, I don't think Ally would mind but I can come in to yours tomorrow morning and talk to her. I don't think she'd appreciate it if we just walked into school without telling her."

Camila nodded, looking down as if to see how much of her thighs were actually visible.

Lauren tentatively placed her hand on Camila's thigh, running her fingertips along the scars.

"I don't understand how you could touch them."

"I want you to know that I don't think they're repulsive or disgusting."

"They are, though."

Lauren shook her head. "If they were I wouldn't want to touch them, would I?" Lauren said, looking up at Camila. "Do you sleep much?"

"I try but every time I fall asleep it just all plays out in my head again. Like a movie, over and over and I can't stop it and I-I..."

"Hey, calm down." Lauren whispered softly, placing her hand on Camila's cheek and lightly rubbing her thumb along her cheekbone.

"I just want it to stop. I don't wanna see it anymore." Camila croaked, looking up at Lauren with the saddest eyes she'd ever seen which broke Lauren's heart.

"I know and I'd give anything to be able to help you but I don't know what to do other than tell you that I'm here to listen if you ever have to talk. I know that's not much but it's all I can give you."

"I know you can't do anything. It's me, I'm the one with the broken head, I just don't know how to fix it."

"First of all you have to realize that it wasn't your fault."

"But what if it was?"

"Alright. I haven't heard your side of the story, just Ally's, tell me how it was your fault, love?"

"I should've got her out of the car."

"Why couldn't you?"

"Because she was jammed! The dashboard was all bashed in and it had her pinned, I couldn't even reach the belt buckle."

"Ok, and when she was driving did you grab the wheel, were you bugging her or doing anything to hinder her driving ability?"

"No, I was reading."

"See, there you go. You didn't do anything to make her crash and you tried to help her out but she was stuck, you almost got yourself killed trying to save her, you done everything you could, sometimes that's just not good enough."

"But why wasn't it good enough?" Camila asked, sounding like a child.

Lauren shrugged, lightly running her fingertips along Camila's forehead and down her jawline. "I wish I had all the answers for you, sweetheart, but I just don't. Stuff like this happens and I know it isn't fair but there's nothing we can do about it."

"Have you ever thought about being a psychiatrist or something?"

"Nah, I'm gonna be an astronaut." Lauren said making Camila giggle. Lauren smiled at that, lightly frowning her eyebrows. "You laugh now but you'll be kicking yourself when you see the headlines 'Lauren Jauregui, first human being on the sun'."

"Ah, right, so that's your plan? Forget the fact that the sun is an incredibly hot ball of plasma."

Lauren scoffed, "You need to have a little faith, sweetheart."

"Ok, well, good luck with that."

"What did you wanna be when you were a kid?"

"A pirate." Camila said making Lauren laugh and rest her forehead against Camila's shoulder. "What? Don't you think I'd be a good pirate?"

"Yeah. No. I could totally see you in an eye patch and a parrot on your shoulder, sailing the seven seas in search of treasure."

"Damn straight. I'd have a golden tooth and everything."

"Well, when you become a pirate you'll have to call me while I'm working on my tan on the sun."

"Long distance calls are kinda expensive and I don't think the sun has good reception.

"True, there would be a lot of interference. I'll just have to wait until I'm back on earth."

"Damn, I was excited to talk to someone on the sun."

Lauren smiled, grabbing a hold of Camila's hand and playing with her fingers. "What you doing Saturday?"

"Nothing, why?"

"How about that date? I have a rough idea of where I wanna take you but it's a three hour drive so we'll have to leave early."

"Where?"

"I could tell you that but then I'd have to kill you. Sorry."

Camila rolled her eyes. "Saturday sounds good."

"Cool. It's a date."

"Can I have a hint?" Camila pouted.

"Fine. It's in Orlando, but that's all you're getting outta me, woman."

"Orlando, huh? I've not been there since I was a kid."

"Well, we're going Saturday." Lauren said, lying down on her back next to Camila and reached across to turn the light off. "Good night, love."

"Night." Camila replied and Lauren switched the light off before settling in to go to sleep.