A.N. Make sure you read the authors note down below, I have a challenge with a prize for y'all!

When I hear the door shut behind me I somehow mange the courage to not cry. Even though my husband, the man I'm in love with, just threw me out of his room. Instead of breaking all over again, I make my way towards an old friend, or at least someone I could call an ally. Room number 35 holds the woman with the most spunk of all.

Joanna Mason

However, when I reach her door, my hand pauses on the doorknob; fear stopping me from going in. I'm afraid of what I'll see. Johanna Mason seemed to carry an air of invincibility. So much fire and determination. It is hard to believe that I might find her broken.

Finding courage, I twist the knob and step into the room. Immediately, chocolate brown eyes lock on me, analyzing my every feature. So critical is her gaze, that I don't know whether to be embarrassed or afraid. I slowly walk further into the room, and Johanna's gaze never falters in its intensity. When I'm a few feet from the bed, I stop.

Johanna looks tiny, the small hospital bed threatens to swallow her. She's wrapped in a cocoon of blankets, but she's still shivering. Her short brown hair is gone, having been shaved off by the Capitol. Her cheeks are hollow and her lips are chapped. Her eyes are sunken and red.

"You look awful."

"You're so fat, you could be mistaken for a whale."

For a second neither of us so much as breathes . . . and then the corners of Johanna's lips twitch upward in a smile. "Never thought I'd say it, but it's good to see you."

"Likewise," I reply as I pull up a chair to sit down. "I won't ask you how you are. We both know the answer to that already."

"Good, skip the pleasantries. I always thought they were a waste of time."

It's the perfect opening to begin my questioning, but I can't make myself take it. Johanna just escaped Capitol torture. The last thing she probably wants to do is talk about it. However, before I can think of something else to say, Johanna beats me to it.

"How's Golden Boy?" she asks. "You seen him yet?"

I drop my gaze to the floor and my shoulders slouch. "I've seen him."

She looks at me with a scowl and an attitude towards my response. "You've seen him?" She replies sarcastically. "Honestly I expected more from you, fire ball. I really thought you would be jumping up and down now that your star crossed lover is back."

I shake my head and frown. "He doesn't want me around, Joanna. The Peeta that I fell in love with, he's gone. And I don't know what they did to y'all in the Capitol, but I do know that the man in the hospital bed door next door is not the person I married."

She laughs and for a second I think the old Joanna has returned, but then her eyes go dark almost as if she is reliving her nightmares. "They did things unimaginable to us, things you don't want to know about. And I don't know what type of love you and lover boy share, but I do know that when he was yelling for you every night, that had to of meant something. That has to fall in to you're crazy idea of what love is." I stare at her and she smirks before showing me her missing teeth.

"They really messed you up in there." I comment and she stares me in the eyes.

"More than you could ever know."

Dr. Hodgens is waiting for me in the hallway when I close Joanna's door behind me. "We need to talk."

We need to talk. Those words are ones you never really want to hear, you spend your whole life trying to avoid them because we all know they only bring bad things. Never good.

I don't respond, I simply stand and stare at him, I can feel my glued together heart breaking again.

"Hey rosy posey," Rye and Haymitch walk towards me but Rye's smiling face drops when he sees me. "What's going on?"

"I was just about to tell, Katniss how Peeta is." Dr. Hodgens motions to a few chairs in the waiting room and I slowly take the one furthest from him. "He was tortured for more than month," Dr. Hodgens says bluntly. "His mind is far from okay." He returns his gaze to me.

"Why are you telling me this, I already know that my husband isn't the same?" My voice cracks when it comes out and he frowns.

"The man you love is still there, but right now he's too hurt to be all that he once was. Katniss, there are repercussions to the kind of trauma Peeta received. Have you ever heard of PTSD? Post-traumatic stress disorder?"

I shake my head, and Dr. Hodgens  sighs. "It's a type of anxiety disorder that typically follows someone who has experienced a traumatic event," he explains. "This isn't going to be easy for him, Katniss. His wounds will heal, but I'm afraid his mind will take much longer."

"What's wrong?" I ask, but Dr. Hodgens shakes his head.

"There's not necessarily anything wrong," he says. "There's nothing that I can physically go in and fix. It's a psychological disorder . . . and I have a hunch that his case will be very bad."

"Because of the tracker jacker venom," Haymitch states more than asks, and Dr. Hodgens nods.

"Yes, I believe so," he says. "While the venom will leave his system in a few days, the effects, combined with what he has endured, I believe will be very detrimental to his symptoms, most specifically the flashbacks."

"Flashbacks?" Rye repeats worriedly.

"Yes, flashbacks." Dr. Hodgens purses his lips, as if deciding how best to explain all that he needs to. "Flashbacks are when the victim relives the event over and over. They can last seconds and then again they can last minutes. The flashbacks themselves can be triggered by anything. Anything that could remind him of something involving his torture. Running water, for example, may cause a flash back, since his lungs show evidence of water torture. Sudden noises, especially metallic. Any number of things could trigger a flashback, and sadly we'll just have to wait and see what his triggers are, bit by bit. When you left this morning, Peeta had a small flashback and while it wasn't terrible it showed us how bad of a place he is in right now. Katniss, I think that you might be a trigger."

"How could she be a trigger?" Rye asks and Dr. Hodgens replies easily.

"He wasn't here." He motions around and I don't understand what he means.

"I don't get it. What do you mean he wasn't here?"

"Peeta missed out on a lot of things during your pregnancy and he wasn't able to be here for you when you lost your son. The guilt of all that is weighing him down and he's unable to come back from it." He explains.

"And so when he sees me, it reminds him." I say slowly realizing everything he is saying.

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

"What are the other symptoms?" I ask tremulously.

"Nightmares, of course," Dr. Hodgens answers. "Emotionally, Peeta may be extremely distant or be so consumed with emotion that he lashes out, whether in anger or tears. He may avoid people, show less of his moods. He may be very detached from it all and show no interest in normal activity. He may also be hyper vigilant and startle easily."

"But, from what I know about Peeta, I'm anticipating more emotion, since it's such an big part of who he is," Dr. Hodgens continues. "That being said, that's also why I'm more worried. Flashbacks are riveting. They'll hold him in their grasp until he snaps out of it. He may believe that it's real and try to protect himself from whoever is in the room. While it may be a friend, all he will see is someone who will try to hurt him."

"And so he'll hurt them first," Haymitch says, and Dr. Riley nods.

"Also, random outbursts of irritation and anger are common. Say something simple, like tying a knot, causes him to become frustrated. Instead of taking a deep breath and trying again, like he normally would, instead he'll lash out."

"He would never hurt me." I tell them and Dr. Hodgens starts to speak before I cut him off. "No, he wouldn't. I know Peeta and even if he isn't in his right mind, he would never hurt me. Now can I see him?"

"Actually," Dr. Hodgens says, "I'd like to try something first."

"What do you mean?"

"I'd like to have Rye go in and talk to Peeta, I want to see his reaction when he sees his brother." He tells us and I look towards Rye.

"Yeah, of course, anything for Babe." He says and I smile just a little at the memories of Peeta and Rye telling me their nicknames.

"Babe here use to be called baby brother, but when he got into the 3rd grade he said it was "to young for him" so we had to shorten it down. Babe was the best name for him."

I'm drawn back from the memory when Haymitch and I stand in front of a two way mirror in Peeta's room, waiting for Rye to come in. He's sleeping peacefully and I wonder if they drugged him. I refocus my attention on Rye and Peeta. Rye is speaking softly so I only catch every other word, but it still doesn't make much sense. He must simply be rambling about nothing, merely filling the silence.

After about five minutes, Rye laughs weakly before saying, "Hey, you want to hear a joke?" At Peeta's silence, he continues. "A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly. Suddenly, Lorraine dies. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, 'I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone.'" Rye chuckles. "Get it? It's funny." Peeta still doesn't wake. "When something's funny, one typically laughs."

"I'm laughing on the inside," Peeta murmurs with his eyes still closed, causing Rye to startle before his grin threatens to split his face in two.

"I knew you were faking," Rye says smartly.

"Yeah right."

"Why are your eyes still closed?"

"Because I don't want to see your ugly face." Peeta's eyes flutter open to look at his brother. "I'm in enough pain as it is."

Rye's smile falls a little. "Yeah, well you're not looking too hot either, Mr. Blonde, Buff, and Beautiful."

"Sorry," Peeta retorts. "Torture really doesn't promote good looks. The prep team they gave me really had a time fixing me up anytime I had to do an interview."

My breath catches in my throat at his blunt statement, but even more so the ease in which it was said. It's like the events don't bother him. It's almost like he thinks it's normal. In the other room, Rye looks just as shocked as I am.

"Everything that happened it's all my fault and I should have known that you can't just run towards a hovercraft and expect to not be punished. I should have been here with Katniss, being a husband and a father." He struggles to breathe. "But NO, I was in a cell in the bottom of the Capitol, rotting while everyone was here!" He begins to yell and his vitals spike.

"What's happening?" I ask Dr. Hodgens and he grabs my arm before I can run to Peeta.

"He's having a flashback and you can't go in there, it's too dangerous."

"I can't go in there, I can't go in there!" I yell at him. "I don't care what you say, that's my husband and I'm going in there." I rip my arm from his and pull the door open to his room. I carefully sit on the edge of Peeta's bed, laying a gentle hand on his chest. His open, sightless eyes stare ahead of him, and I fumble my words as I try to find something to say. "Peeta." No reaction. "Peeta, come back to me. You promised." Rye leaves the room, giving me space but I know everyone is simply on the other side of the mirror waiting to stick Peeta with a sedative.

Unfortunately, these words do not have the same effect as they did earlier. Peeta simply continues to stare.

"Peeta, you have to come back," I tell him softly. "I've been without you for too long. You can't leave me like this."

Still no reaction. Not even a twitch.

"Peeta!" I hiss in anger and despair. "Are you seriously going to do this? Are you really going to give in, now? After all that you've gone through? Don't take the easy way out, Peeta. Don't do it!"

Nothing.

"Come on." I'm pleading now. I caress his bruised cheekbone. Sweep the some of his curls out of his eyes. Gently, I take his hand and place it on my stomach, and talk to him softly. "Come back to me."

My words hang suspended in the air, hovering over us, as if they're slowly penetrating Peeta's subconscious. I wait with bated breath, my heart hammering in my chest as I clutch the tenuous hope floating within me. Seconds tick by as Peeta remains in this catatonic state, and just as I feel myself begin to despair . . . Peeta blinks.

"Katniss?" he questions confused. "What happened? What—"

I watch as the memory slowly comes back to him. I watch as he retreats into himself once more, forcing himself not to feel the emotion raging inside of him. "Peeta," I begin, but he cuts me off.

"You were never supposed to hear that," he says. "You were never supposed to know."

"It doesn't matter—"

"Yes, it does."

"All that matters is that you're here," I say firmly. "You're with me."

"Then why do I feel as if that part of myself died in that cell?"

I don't have an answer.

A.N. Aww Peeta baby it'll be okay. He is in such a dark place and it's killing me guys! But anyways thought I might do something a little fun and have a challenge for y'all! So whoever comments first will get a shoutout in the next 3 chapters AND I'll read one of their stories. Whoever comments second will get a shoutout in the next 2 chapters. And you've probably guessed this already but whoever comments third will get a shoutout in the next chapter! HAVE FUN! Also leave me some ideas of how I should maybe end the book. Happy ending or sad ending?