━。゜✿ฺ✿ฺ゜。━

❝ and now that your weight's come off my shoulders,
i realize that I can fly,
i needed to find me (now i know),
the key was inside of me all along. ❞

- levanter, stray kids.

━。゜✿ฺ✿ฺ゜。━

Seeing nothing, only darkness - a little lightened by the sun beaming down on their face. The hair on their neck stood up, goosebumps on their right arm. In a blink of an eye, their right arm blocked the fist about to attack them. Moving quickly, they manoeuvred their body around the attacker, the feeling of cold stone becoming more apparent.

'Moon Breathing: First Form: Dark Moon, Evening Palace.'

Striking the bokken horizontally, hitting the target straight through their body, not letting up for a second, the attacker used the moment after the strike to attack themselves. Y/N felt the goosebumps on their left arm,  the bokken coming toward them, they moved themselves, blocking the attack with their own bokken. Pushing back, and feeling their muscles tense under the pressure. Gritting their teeth, they used their foot to hit the attacker in the stomach, pushing them back.

'Moon Breathing: Third Form: Loathsome Moon, Chains.'

Moving at the speed of light, boosted by their concentration breathing, they swung their bokken in two giant swings in quick succession, then one smaller swing, crescent moons left in the midst of the quick slashes. The ground's dust kicking up with how quick the form was, the moons creating a bit of destruction in their wake. The attacker blocks the attacks, overwhelmed by the power, but the attacker uses their speed to start attacking Y/N, hitting their sides which were left vulnerable.

Y/N falls to the ground, with a 'oof' leaving their lips, sighing in discontent. The student unwrapped the cloth that was around their eyes, looking at the hand held out to them, which they take.

"You lasted the longest you have. Good job, little moon." Gyomei spoke, patting their shoulder, smiling at them.

Y/N nodded in thanks, wiping their forehead with their arm. "Are we done for today, Gyomei-sensei?"

After a few seconds of no response, Y/N looked back at Gyomei who was standing looking at them in thought, "Gyomei-sensei?" They asked.

Gyomei hummed, "No, there's one more thing I would like for you to try to do today, if within the next week." He motioned for Y/N to follow him, "I would like you to move a boulder through the forest, I have marked where you need to move it to." They stopped in front of the boulder, which was almost two times the size of Y/N in height, not to mention the width, no trees surrounding for a couple of miles.

Y/N deadpanned at Gyomei, looking like they got struct with lightning, "You want me," they pointed at themselves, "to move that boulder," they pointed to the boulder, "through the forest?"

Gyomei laughed, "Yes, little moon." He calmed down and smiled at them, "If you move this boulder, you can go to the Final Selection and finally become a real demon slayer." He left it at that and begun walking away towards his estate, pausing just outside of the area with no trees, then turned back to Y/N just to say, "I know you'll be able to do it. Just remember all the training we have done. Namu Amid Butsu."

Y/N watched him leave, then turned their gaze towards the boulder, the back at the retreating Gyomei, then back at the boulder.

"How the fuck?" Y/N exclaimed, look at their arms. Sure, they've gained muscle but how the hell would you move a whole damn boulder?

They put their hands against the boulder and pushed, the boulder only moving slightly. "Well, this is just great." Y/N crossed their arms and squinted at the boulder. They knew Gyomei only gave them this test because he knew they would pass, and they knew it was more than strength at play here, they needed to combine everything they had learned and use it.

The sun was still up, even though it was lowering slowly with the sky getting darker. Y/N decided they would try to at least figure out how to move the boulder, even slightly. They got into a meditative position and took a deep breath, allowing them to focus on their mind.

For the first time that day, Y/N allowed them to think about the past year. It had been exactly a year since Kocho Kanae had died, and it was a rough first few months, although Y/N had done as Kanae asked – looking after her sisters, they begun to overwork themselves with training. Gyomei – in kind works, sucked at training unless it was physical spars, they relied on Kanae's observation skills to know what they did wrong and how to correct it, but with her gone, Y/N had to work on their own to correct their own mistakes. Gyomei became a big part of Y/N training, as although he could not see (and he sucked at teaching), he performed the actions that they should be doing, and with the observational skills that learned from Kanae, was able to pick apart what they were doing different to Gyomei.

Along with still meeting Kagaya every now and then, Y/N also stopped by the butterfly estate frequently (they take the wish of Kanae very seriously). They normally stayed for a whole day and left during the night now that they had enough training. Throughout the year, they were able to completely finish and master their Moon Breathing forms, the ones that Y/N was able to remember. Y/N was correct when they realised they needed a longer sword for some of the forms, but it also worked with a normal nichirin sword as Y/N was able to make up for the lack of longe-range with their speed. That's where Gyomei decided to adopt the nickname 'little moon' for them, not that they minded, it caught on to Kagaya too. The Stone Hashira was the first one to call them that, and they felt warm when Gyomei decided to use that nickname too.

Another thing Y/N learned was that they could sense battle spirits – not that of auras, but when being attacked by someone, they could feel their attack coming and defend accordingly, they remembered it quite early on into their training after Kanae died, and it happened when they had a blurry memory come back during a spar between them and Gyomei.

"You need to practice, focus on that intense feeling that you feel when you're about to be attacked, your body will already realise it's being targeting and give you signs. Listen to them." The pink aura spoke, his voice calm and steady. Y/N felt a cloth being wrapped around their eyes, constricting their eyesight, the persons fingers cold, but tighened the cloth on their face gently, "I'm not going to hit you, but your body will think I will. Focus on it, listen to its warnings."

That's all Y/N remembered, but it was enough for them to figure out what the voice was talking about, and that was the start of when they used a blindfold when sparring against Gyomei, and within a few months they were able to use it to their advantage, although they hadn't mastered it.

The last thing Gyomei taught them (or well, showed), was the use of 'repetitive actions'. The use of pre-existing actions, and the importance of his chant of 'Namu Amid Butsu'. Opening up all five senses at the same time, using painful and angry memories kept in the back of your mind as repetitive actions. Y/N didn't think much of it, but it would probably be important in moving the boulder.

Y/N shivered, making them open their eyes only to see the moon already peeking out from the horizon. Deciding to just go home for the night, they could try again the next day.

-

Standing in front of the boulder the next day after doing their usual workout routine – although it had changed slightly to only doing their workout, consisting of moving the logs, which now was four logs instead of three, and doing strength training. They didn't run down the mountain, nor drown themselves in the freezing cold water anymore. The waterfall became a painful place to visit for Y/N, rather than a calming place where they would go to wind down.

Putting their hands on the boulder, they grit their teeth. They began thinking about their parents, even though they couldn't remember them, it was painful to know they had been killed. They remembered their warm blood splattering their face, how cold they felt in that moment when the demon slowly crept towards them.

They thought about how angry they felt when the news of Kanae hit them, the red piping hot anger was ready to consume them when they laid in the snow. How cold they felt – how similar it was to that feeling when their parents died.

Without even realising it, the boulder had moved quite a bit, about a meter. Y/N's throat felt dry, a bamboo shoot filled with water already waiting for them, they internally thanked Gyomei.

At least they knew what they needed to do to pass the test, they knew they'd pass within the next few days, but it was if they could bring out the painful memories they tried to repress. Y/N sighed, putting the bamboo shoot down, now half empty. They crossed their arms, feeling their muscles tense – they were quite muscular now. All that hard work paid off.

Realising the sun was coming down, nearing the evening, they decided they would go back to the estate and have some food and meditate for a bit. They were still a bit off as recalling those painful memories was still a bit of a sore spot.

The next day, Y/N stood in front of the boulder, and it seemed to have moved back in place. They knew it was Gyomei – he wanted them to move it all the way in one go. Y/N cursed him in their mind, but still knowing he did it with good reason (totally not because he didn't want to send them to Final Selection because he was scared of losing them – of course not!) so they did it properly.

They knew they would be able to do it today, it would just be painful. Very painful.

Y/N took a sip of water, placing it down out of the way. They put their hands on the boulder, gritting their teeth. "Namu Amid Butsu."

"Such tasty flesh," A grotesque voice sounded out, giggling in glee, "I will be having a feast tonight." The demon slashed at the already dead man, ignoring the crying child that was holding their mother. The demon licked his lips in content, grinning wildly.

The child held their mother, whimpering, "Please okaa-san," they kept nudging her, their tears sliding down their face and onto their mother's face, who only smiled gently at her child. The mother looked at the demon, seeing it slowly turn towards them, the grin somehow widening, seeing such a (in the demon's eyes) pathetic scene had it cackling.

The mother lifted her hand to the child's cheek, wiping the blood that fell from the claw mark that went across their eye, "Run, my child." The child glancing at the demon who crept forward at an agonisingly slow pace. "Run, before it gets you too. Leave me."

The child held their mother's hand to their cheek tightly, staining it red with their mother's own blood. Their clothes clung to their skin, drenched in sweat and blood, "I'm not leaving you!" They yelled. They grabbed the closest thing they could that could act as a weapon, but their mother stopped the child before they could grab anything.

"Run, Y/N!" The mother exclaimed, pushing the child up as best as she could in the position she was in.

Now standing up, Y/N had no choice but to back away from the ever-growing closer demon, its eyes filled to the brim with hunger and malice. They backed into a corner, realising that the demon was blocking the exit, watching as the demon stopped at their dying mother, its eyes looking over her up and down, "A marechi? How rare. I will feast on you later."

In the blink of an eye, the demon had stuck its razor-sharp claws, ripping their mothers chest in half, a pool of blood now staining the wooden floor. Y/N yelped when the demons eyes focused on them, curling into themselves in the corner, not wanting to watch the demon grow closer.

Just as the demon had his hand up, ready to kill them, they closed their eyes. The next thing they heard was the sound of flesh ripping off and a rough, "Despicable. How weak."

Y/N opened their eyes, and all they could see before they were brought into a hug was pink hair, the smell of blood, the feeling of their clothes sticking to them and the tears rolling down their face, and most of all, the fear that had taken over their whole body. The person stood frozen for a moment, as if only just realising Y/N was there and seemed to be deciding on something. A few moments later, they walked towards the frozen child slowly, like walking towards a rabid angry animal.

His body was cold, but he held Y/N so gently.

"It's okay, you're fine now. He's dead."

Y/N's breath hitched briefly, nearly messing up their steps, but pushed forward. Gyomei watched from the side, proud of his student. Seeing them push the boulder, almost halfway there, hearing them whisper the chant they had learned from him.

"I wish I could live a normal life." The black-haired woman said, her green and pink clips fluttering slightly in the wind. "Wouldn't that be nice? Not knowing demons existed, living in ignorance."

"That is not our life, Kanae-san, we have to focus on the presence." Y/N deadpanned, ever the realist.

Kanae laughed, she adored the younger one, "Yes, but we humans like to imagine, no? Say... what would you like to be doing if you weren't training to be a slayer right now?"

Y/N looked at their friend weirdly, but sighed, deciding to indulge the older one, "I don't know. I can't remember anything from the age of 10, I woke up in a home – I don't even know if it was mine, and ever since then I had been journeying and trying to remember until Gyomei-sensei found me."

"Hmm, I wish you find something or someone you can love and find comfort in one day." Kanae smiled gently at them, putting her arm around their shoulder. They were sat on the log in front of the river that at the waterfall – their usual place to sit and talk. "When demons no longer roam, if there ever comes a day, I want my sisters to live a normal life and keep the smile on their faces."

"That's nice." Y/N whispered, putting their head on her shoulder, basking in the warmth Kanae radiated. They could feel their eyes slip, feeling quite sleepy after the day they had – even more intense training than usual.

Kanae noticed this and let them use her shoulder as a pillow, smiling even more softly than usual, watching as the sun let the moon shine for the time being. Not realising that Y/N was still awake at the time, Kanae whispered something that stayed with them:

"Let your heart bloom into a flower, little moon."

Y/N chanted 'Namu Amid Butsu' one last time before screaming in pain – not physical pain, but the once held pain and grief that they held in their heart. They didn't realise they stopped pushing the boulder until they felt a hand on their shoulder.

"You did it, little moon." Gyomei whispered, not wanting to startle them, "You did it."

Gyomei brought them into a warm hug, something they needed in that moment. Y/N wrapped their arms around his tall figure, needing the warmth and love Gyomei seemed to radiate for them. In that moment, they couldn't be more grateful for him. When Y/N let out that scream, it was almost like they let out all of their feelings they had been bottling up and they felt freer than before, like they weren't weighted down by anything. Gyomei unwrapped his arms around them and held their shoulders with his hands, bending down to them.

"Y/N-san, my student, you will go to the Final Selection and become a demon slayer." He stated, "You have trained for this, and I have all my faith in you that you will become a great slayer."

Y/N nodded at his words, letting a smile grow on their face. Gyomei nodded back and started leading them back to his (and now Y/N's) estate, he pat their head, ruffling their hair, "I will hope to see you at a pillar meeting one day. You will meet the other pillars for the first time. Funnily enough, although they don't show it, they are quite intrigued by you." He let out a small laugh, "They want to meet the person who was trained under me, and not just that," He paused for a second, "they want to meet the person Kanae kept raving and praising about." He furrowed his eyebrows for a moment, before a teasing smile crept on his face, "As the Sound Pillar would say, 'I want to meet this flamboyant person!'"

Y/N laughed at Gyomei, really questioning his ability to mimic the other pillars. This was out of character for Gyomei as usually he never teased, or really talked as much, as he would rather let the others do the talking, but they knew he wanted to spend as much time with them before they went off to Final Selection. Y/N doesn't think the other pillars would believe them either if they told them that Gyomei had decided to mock one of them.

-

Y/N had just finished eating, their nichirin blade strapped to their waist, their buttoned up shirt tucked into their hakama pants. They decided to leave their black and purple nagagi kimono here, in case it got ripped. They had a spare yellow haori with white lines at the ends, the same as Gyomei's except it had no writing on the white parts.

The sheath was the usual nichirin blade sheath, except it had a small pink and green butterfly clip strapped to it, it dangled slightly, swaying with the movement. Y/N knew they would take it with them and ask for the Uyubashiki kids (Y/N must remember to visit the family soon – it had been too long since their last visit) to ask them to see if the swordsmiths could customise it for them.

"Do you have everything?"

Y/N nodded to Gyomei's question, now both standing on the engawa on his estate. They would miss this place for the week they were away.

Gyomei messed around with uniform – they won't ask why, but it was probably to do with the fact he was nervous, not that he would admit it.

"I should go, Gyomei-sensei." Y/N said, slowly backing away from the estate.

"Yes, I would say be careful, but I know you'll have no trouble there," He smiled.

Y/N turned around and started their journey, Gyomei waiting until he couldn't hear their footsteps anymore, and walked back into his estate, not knowing what to do now that he was alone, once more.

Until a squawk was heard, "Mission for Stone Pillar, head southwest! Southwest!"

Well, at least he knew what he could do, now.