While also somewhat hoping it never came.
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The morning came just as fast as ennoshita had fallen asleep. But what didn't leave was the sick feeling that came with what he had done only two hours ago.

"Chikara!!" His mother shouted from down the hall, "it's time to get up!"

Ennoshita forced his eyes open, but they stayed lidded as he was too tired to  fully open them. His hand wasn't as sticky as it was before he fell asleep, but it still felt sickening.

He sat up, going to rub his eyes before stopping. He looked down at his hands, and then used his other to rub his eyes. He slowly stretched out, letting out a slow yawn as he attempted to fully wake up.

"Chikara!" Shouted his mother once more.

Ennoshita let out a groan in response, trying to make it loud enough for his mom to hear. He scanned his room, then noticing his underwear still on his floor.

He gets up, gently picking up his underwear, slowly sliding them up his legs, letting the oversized shirt fall over. He brushed his shirt a little, staring down at the little bit of design he could see. It was still his dad's, a band shirt from his day.

The door to his room suddenly opened, making him jump and look over at the door. He grabbed the side of his shirt, and hid his hand with his shirt. His mom stepped into his room, glaring at ennoshita.

"Chikara, I've been yelling at you for ten minutes." She says, sounding annoyed, but more frustrated than anything.

Ennoshita quietly nodded, staring down at the ground before gagging a little. "Mom, I don't feel too well.." he said quietly, playing with the rem of his shirt.

"What's wrong?" She asked, getting concerned and moving towards him. She stopped for a second, taking a look at him. Ennoshita was already flustered, making his lie just slightly more believable.

"Do you think you need to stay home?" She asked, almost a little annoyed as she assumed what the answer would be. As much as she cared for her child's health, she cared for his education. But, as much as she does, one is clearly more important than the other.

Ennoshita quietly nodded, trying to look as sick as possible. His mother sighed, and nodded along with him.

"Okay.." she said quietly, before turning to the door. "I'll call in, but you'll have to stay home by yourself, I don't have any sick days left!" She called out as she made her way down the hall, leaving ennoshita in his room.

He stood still for a while, feeling awkward and not sure what to do. He eventually walked over to his bed, and sat back down on his bed. He didn't have to go to school, but then what was he supposed to do? He didn't really miss school that often, despite how he acted. He was still average, despite all his efforts not to be.

The house was rather quiet, despite the soft sounds of shuffling downstairs coming from his mom. His dad was already at work, so it was only his mom. He heard the door open, and a quick "rest up!" from his mom, and the door shut.

He was completely alone again. It felt worse than being around so many people who ignored him. It was a whole other level of lonely, one that stung even more.

He grabbed his phone, laying back down in his bed, too tired to care about the mess from earlier that morning. Too tired to feel grossed out. He laid still for a long time, what felt like hours. He was just lonely, bored, tired.

There was nothing to do but lay,

and cry.

He could feel his eyes tightening, the tears starting to come back, flooding over him with the force of a semi truck. He let out a breath, and he reached for his phone, but then stopped. He looked down at his hand, which was now dry. He almost gagged as the disgust returned ten full.

He immediately got up, needing to wash this revolting feeling away that instant. He left his room, walking down the hall to the bathroom. He flicked on the lights, walking over to the sink and turning it on. He put his hand under the cold water, which made his hands stiff, almost frozen, but he persisted. He used soap, so much soap he used up the little they had left in the tube.

He scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed, his hand turned a bright rose red, and only when it started to sting did he stop. He was so overwhelmed with nausea, and a hideous feeling, he couldn't stop scrubbing. Not until it physically hurt.

He turned off the tap, letting the water drain down into the drain of the sink. He looked up in the mirror, squinting a little at his reflection. His hair was slightly messy, and there were bags under his eyes. He grabbed a towel, and gently patted down his wet hands.

He went back to the mirror, examining his face and features. He didn't feel ugly, he felt worse. Normal.

He didn't look abnormally ugly. He didn't have any acne, but he didn't have a smooth face. His teeth weren't really outstandingly yellow, just unclean. His hair was messy, but it held its shape. For anybody else, this could be a bless, a graceful experience, but ennoshita was simply bitter. He knocked a few things off the shelf, but when they landed in the still soapy kitchen sink, he regretted it.

"Shit.." he grumbled, picking them up and placing them onto a towel. He shut the cabinet door and stormed out of the bathroom. Now he was just pissed.

He made his way out of the bathroom, not even bothering to shut the door. He knew he'd be alone now, normally something that was chilling, and a struggle. He made his way back into his room. He was too distracted to fully feel lonely.

To feel lonely, he had to lay down, and to lay down, he needed to clean. He was still frustrated, and just wanted to lay down in a depressing rot. But he couldn't.

He shoved everything off hid bed, taking his sheets off his bed. He tossed them aside, by his laundry hamper. He was annoyed, and now he had to do laundry.

'Why can't I just have one day? One!'

Next, laundry. He pulled the laundry all the way to the little closet room where the machines were. He poured as much as he could fit in, not really caring to sort them
He searched the dresser in the room for the soap, and then he quickly poured what he deemed a reasonable amount, and turned it on.

He laid against the dyer, his back aching from hauling around his laundry. He was so tired, and he still had to get new sheets. He was too tired to be doing this.

'..what if I just laid down..?'

Maybe he could just lay on his bare bed, he didn't need sheets did he? He was too tired to get up now though, and he debated just sleeping in the laundry room.

Ennoshita continued to sit alone in the laundry room for another few minutes, nearly falling asleep. But it was uncomfortable, and the washer was loud.

'Why can't I just have one thing?'

He thought again. He groaned and got up, kicking his hamper on his way out of the laundry room. He was pissed off now, too angry to sleep, so he decided on changing his sheet. So by the time he was done, he'd be able to sleep in his bed.

He walked to the bathroom where the extra sheets and pillow cases were stored.

He went to grab a sheet, but even looking at one made him feel sick.

'God.. why am I like this?'

He thought, feeling ashamed for what he had done the night before. He pulled away, covering his mouth as he bent over. Now he was going to throw up? He was so disgusting.

He crouched down onto the floor and continued to try and hold in whatever was threatening to come up.

He hated when he got like this, he hated everything. Even being negative was annoying, and revolting.

The feeling finally disappeared and he slowly got up, uncovering his mouth, but this disgusted feeling didn't.

He quickly grabbed a sheet before he had a chance to almost vomit again. He walked to his room, and tossed the sheet on. He spent the next five minutes struggling with the bed attempting to get his sheets on. It was always difficult for him to put the sheets on, he got too tired.

He finally got it on, and laid down on his bed with a sigh. He was so tired. He was about to fall asleep when he realized the absent of a certain sound, the washer.

'Finished already?'

He asked in his head, getting up and off his bed. He walked down from his bedroom to the laundry room, checking the washer, and indeed it was done. He groaned and picked up the wet clothes, bit by bit shoving them into the dryer. He grabbed a dry sheet and tossed it in as well, before turning the dial to 60 and pressing the button.

He laid on the now vibrating dryer, slightly shaking with it. He started to sleep, as the vibrations reminded him of such of a massage chair, or maybe a hot tub, or maybe..

He quickly stood up, feeling repulsed that he would even think of such things. He didn't want to lay on it anymore.

He quickly walked out of the laundry room, unable to get the thought of the certain object the vibrations of the dryer reminded him of. He felt so disgusting.

He quickly made his way to the kitchen, hopefully food would take his mind off of it. He searched the pantry for something to eat, or really anything to distract himself.

He searched and searched, tossing things around and making a mess of the kitchen. He eventually settled on some crackers, grabbing the whole box as he sat down on the floor and started eating.

'God this is such a small box'

He thought as he shoved cracker after cracker into his mouth. It just settled in his mind how hungry he was.

He was starving.

He pushed crackers into his mouth, nearly swallowing some whole. He was so hungry. He kept shoving and chewing and swallowing. He never realized how hungry he truly was.

He had forgotten about anything besides eating now, everything else was irrelevant, not important, all there was was eat.

Eat and never stop, he had to eat. He wasn't even hungry anymore, he just needed food.

He got up and grabbed whatever he could, a box of granola bars, and he ate it. He continued to stuff his mouth, unwrapping as many as he could and shoving them into his mouth. Crumbs spilled everywhere but he didn't care, it wasn't as important as eating.

One after the other he got fuller and fuller but he didn't stop, he couldn't stop. Not now, not ever. He got up, rushing to the pantry and grabbing something off the floor. A small package of pepperoni sticks.

It was already opened and mostly finished, and now ennoshita had fully finished it. But he still needed more. It was like a pit emptied his stomach every time he put something in his mouth. He just needed to fill it. Feed the pit.
Feed himself.

He rummaged around the pantry for a while, grabbing out anything that could satisfy his hunger.

He finished at least five boxes of random stuff, and was now laying on the ground, sick out of his mind as he tried to hold down everything he ate.

The hunger hadn't gone away, but if he ate anymore he'd surely throw up. Now he was just stuck between a feeling of sickness and hunger. They wouldn't go away. He needed to eat more but he couldn't.

How could he eat more if he was going to end up throwing it all up?

'Unless..?'

He quickly got up, grabbing as much as he could of the remaining food and he ran to the bathroom. He tossed the food to the side, getting on his knees and leaning before the toilet. Two fingers went down his throat as be began to gag. With all the food already filling him it didn't take long for it to come back up.

He hated vomiting, but he needed more space for food. So out went the old and in came the new.

He flushed the toilet before hurling himself towards the food he had tossed, and started to devour more.

Chips, fruit, soda, crackers, leftovers. Anything that was easy to get was in his mouth and being chewed and swallowed.

It wasn't long until he ran into the same problem. Too hungry, not enough room. So he made room.

Two fingers down his throat again, but this time it took a lot more to get rid of it.

Tears welled in his eyes as he gagged, and eventually threw up. He was panting, and nearly crying, but he was still hungry.

He flushed the toilet, and back to eating it was.

He finally finished the food, and this time without any help, he threw up.

He stayed down on the bathroom ground, surrounded by empty boxes and wrappers. He was still a but sick, but fortunately no longer hungry. He had no more energy to get up and move. So he stayed on the ground, closing his eyes.

The bathroom was quiet, and just a bit too bright. His face was scrunched up into a frown. He sighed, and got up. The floor was too uncomfortable for him to sleep. So he hauled his way onto his feet. He made his way up to his own room, not bothering to do anything besides flop down on his bed. He was so happy he had put sheets on his bed.

He felt horribly tired, and he just wanted to have a nap. So that's what he did. He laid down, and closed his eyes. He started to fade into a soft rest, his mouth slightly parted as he got further and further into sleep. It was so nice to finally get some rest. He was so tired.

Then he heard a buzz, it was his phone.

"..fuckk.." He groaned, but sat up anyway. He grabbed his phone unlocking it with a scowl. It was his mom, of course, telling him to do some work. He was so annoyed now. Work? He was sick! But his mom would kill him if she came home and he did nothing.

He tossed his phone to the bottom of his bed and got up. His feet pressed down on one of two pillows that were still on the floor, and he decided to pick those up now that he was up anyway. He grabbed one at a time and tossed them vaguely where they were supposed to go.

Then back down the stairs he went, to retrieve his bag. He sat down as he unzipped the main pocket, digging through until he pulled out a random binder, trying to find a good place to start. No science, or math. Those were too complicated for being this tired. Maybe an extra curricular, but his mom would still get upset with him. He finally settled on just giving in, and doing science. It wasn't math, so it'll have to do.

He got up, taking the small binder with him, which was already full of unfinished work. He hauled his way back up the stairs and into his bed.

He was about to start, but he knew he'd fall asleep sooner than later if he didn't have something else keeping his mind awake. So he grabbed his earbuds and turned on some music. He yawned as he opened the binder, grabbing a pencil and tapping it on the side of his binder as he decided which assignment to finish. He started playing through his liked songs, and prom dress came on. He let it play for a minute, but picked his phone up quickly and switched it.

He was too tired to pick one up, so he simply put it on shuffle and the perfect pair came on. He sighed, letting it play for a bit again as he tried to decide. But then that got boring as well. Was his music taste always this dull?

He clicked skip again and best part came on, but he quickly skipped a few more, and needs came on. He rested his head in his hand, listening for a few seconds before shrugging. He'd never get anything else done, and this was good enough, so back to science.

After a few more minutes of failure, he picked up his phone again and started to open random apps. He was so bored, but there was nothing to do. He opened pinterest, scrolled for a few seconds and then closed it. Opened messages, and then instagram, then tiktok, then messages again, then pinterest, and then messages again, then back to pinterest.

He ultimately put his phone down, and went back to homework. He sighed, eventually forcing himself to pick a chemistry project. He picked his pencil back up as he started working. Question after question, it took him an hour to finish the page. He hated school. Because he wasn't stupid, but he wasn't smart either. He was simply nothing to notice. At least he didn't think he was stupid. Maybe he was.

Maybe that was better.

But he got it done, and set it in his binder. He tossed them to the side, collapsing down onto his bed, and laying in the soft comfort of his pillows. He was unbelievably tired, and didn't care to do any more work than he already had. So sleep it was.

He finally started drifting off again, his mind fading into a fuzzy daze. He softly smiled, as he was finally able to rest.

He got a lot less rest than he was supposed to that day. The whole day was supposed to be for resting, but now it was 1 pm, and he had barely slept. What a hassle.

His body felt heavy, and his mind was going blank as he fell asleep.

When he woke up again, his mother was just entering the front door. The sound of the door closing, and all the shuffling down stairs had woken him up. He groaned, rubbing his eyes as he rolled over and reached to grab his phone.

'..8 pm...?'

He thought to himself. He had so many questions running through his head. He had been asleep for 8 hours? How was his mom only getting home now?

He had two questions. So he decided to get an answer.

He slowly got up, making his way down the stairs to his mother.

"Mom..?" He mumbled, rubbing his eyes some more as they were still a little fuzzy.

His mom turned towards him, giving him a small smile. "I see you're awake now," she said softly, "I hope you're not going to be restless all night now." She joked as well. She had a takeout box in hand, and set it down on the counter.

Ennoshita still looked, and was a little confused, so his mom decided to explain. "You were asleep, so I decided to go out for dinner, and bring you something back." She said softly. That made sense, and ennoshita nodded along. He waddled over, opening the takeout box to see what it was. There wasn't much left, so he assumed the rest was for him. He took it over to the microwave and started heating it up.

"Did you get some work done today?" His mother asked, and he nodded to her question. He wasn't feeling like speaking, so he held up one finger to signal he had gotten one assignment done. His mom sighed, a little frustrated with his silence, but she didn't want to push him away.

She nodded as well as the microwave sounded and ennoshita took out the takeout box. He sat down at the table and said his thanks before taking a few bites. His mom turned the light on, and sat across from him.

She attempted to smile, but she was so tired it was obvious she wasn't happy. Ennoshita remained silent, not wanting to make her more upset. So they say across from eachother, in silence as ennoshita ate his food.

It was a quiet rest of the night.