Part 21

As Jungkook opened the door of Tae's room, he felt all life leaving his body at the sight that he met with.


On the bed was sitting Tae. He was holding a razor in his right hand & placing the Sharp edge of it on his left hand's vein.


"Tae.." Jungkook rushed in & snatched razor from Tae's hand.


"Give it back" Tae said emotionlessly.


"No"


"Give the damn razor back" Tae said this time in raged voice. Stood up & tried to take the razor from Jungkook's hand.


"I'm not giving it back" saying this Jungkook threw the Sharp object somewhere in the room.



"Why did you throw it huh" Tae said hitting Jungkook's chest with his little fists "Get it back. I need it. I need that razor. I need to die. I want to die. I have to die. I have to die then only everyone can live in peace. Everyone is suffering because of me.  Appa is lying in hospital because of me. I'm making everyone's life miserable. I'm bad. I'm a bad horrible person. I need to go. I need to die. Bring that razor back I want to die. I have to"



Jungkook's eyes widened hearing these words.



"Tae listen to me. Tae you need to calm down" he said holding Tae's shoulders. But Tae was listening to him. He kept hitting him & saying "I need to die. I have to die. I want to die. I'm horrible. I want to die"



"TAEHYUNG..." Jungkook shouted loudly shaking Tae's shoulders.



This finally brought Tae back from his trance. This is the first time Jungkook had shouted on him. He looked at Jungkook's face only to find it red in anger.



Tae had never seen Jungkook this angry. At least not on himself. No matter what he did Jungkook never got angry, never shouted at him. But today it seems like he finally snapped.



"What did you say? you want to die! You need to die!" Jungkook started "everyone can live peacefully if you die. Care telling me who this 'everyone' exactly is? Your Eomma? your appa? Me? Tell me who you are talking about? Do you think your Eomma will live peacefully if his precious son is gone? How do think your appa will feel when he'll woke up only to find his only son gone?


And me? What about me" he added in a sad voice, his eyes having a heartbroken look "tell me Tae did you ever think about me? Did you ever think how I would've felt if you really died? Did you have any idea how scared I was that day when you were standing in front of the truck, you fainted on the road. I felt like a failure. Time & again I promised your parents that I will take care of you, I will protect you yet I failed to do it. Today again you're going to take your life. Did you for once thought about me? Did you ever considered my feeling? Do you hate me so much that you are going punish me like this, by snatching the only family I had after years" a tear rolled down Jungkook's eye.



Tae felt his heart breaking seeing that tear. He shook his head saying "no no Jungkook please don't say like this. Please don't cry. I don't hate you. I don't want to punish you. I never want to hurt you ever." He slid down kneeling on the floor & continued to cry "I..I just don't know what to do. It hurts, it hurts so much. A..appa is lying there because of m..me. I..I hurt him so much that h..he ended up like that. I said him that I h...hate him. I..I didn't talk to h..him. I didn't even l..look at him w..when I came here after our marriage. Even after that too he h..hugged me tightly everytime we m..met but I didn't hug him b..back. I saw how s..sad, h..heartbroken he was, still I stayed angry on him. And I did it all for w..whom? For a person to whom I was just a m..money machine. Who just wanted have my money, my b...body. Who never loved me . Forget about love who may be never even have cared for me. Yet I kept h..hurting everyone for him. I hurt Y..You so much too. I did horrible things to you, said horrible w..words to you. I am a bad person Jungkook very bad." Tae kept saying all these while crying & hiccuping.



Jungkook saw Tae almost getting breathless because of too much crying & talking. He couldn't bear to see the younger like that. All his anger turned into sadness seeing Tae crying & hearing his words.



He sat in front of the kneeling boy & pulled him on his lap. He held Tae in his embrace, hugging him & rubbing his back soothingly.


"Shh.. baby, stop crying. Please baby don't cry." He kept saying in gentle voice "you are not bad, never. I know it everyone knows it. You were in love that's why you did all those things. It's not your fault, it's that guy's fault. He's a bad person not you baby. Please baby trust me"


Tae looked innocently at his face "I.. I'm n..not b..bad" he said hiccuping.


"No baby you are not bad." Jungkook told him while wiping his tears slowly. "Your appa too will tell you the same."


"Y.. you t..think so Kookie? W..will he f..forgive me?" Tae asked looking at Jungkook's eyes searching for some reassurance.


"Yes baby your appa will forgive you. He loves you so much. Tomorrow we will go & meet him. You say sorry to him then." Jungkook told him reassuringly.


Tae hid his face in Jungkook's chest & asked sniffing "and you? Will you forgive me too?"


"Yes baby. I was never angry on you to begin with. I just became sad thinking I couldn't take care of you." The older replied sadly.


"No Kookie" Tae shook his head that was still buried in Jungkook's chest  "please don't think like that. You didn't fail. You always take care of me. Please Kookie forgive me I made you think like that." He started crying again.


"Baby please don't cry hmm. Just, just promise me you'll never try to anything like what you tried to do today" Jungkook told him.


"I..I p..promise" Tae said hiccuping.



"Okay then I forgive you. Now please stop crying" Jungkook said to the crying boy in his arms.



Jungkook started to rock gently with the boy in his arm, saying sweet nothings in his ears.



After some time Jungkook heard slow but steady breathing of the boy, indicating he's finally asleep.



Jungkook picked Tae up & took him to the bed. He gently laid the sleeping boy on the bed. Then he too laid beside Tae.



There is no way he's going to leave Tae alone in the room. He felt Tae cuddling up to him. He too hugged the younger boy & let sleep take over him.


______________


Thanks for reading. Hope you like it.

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