Edited ✔️

Sweetheart nudged Icetail. "Hey," she mewed to him. He looked at the medicine cat, expecting Vinetail for a brief moment, before making out the former medicine cat apprentice's silhouette.

"Hi, Sweetheart," said Icetail. "Is there something you need?"

Sweetheart shook her head. "Not really. Since it's leaf-fall already, I wanted to go stalk up on supplies . . . but you know that I can't go by myself."

Icetail nodded. "Sure, I'll come." He remembered the time he collected herbs with Vinetail as an apprentice and sighed sadly at the memory. He shook it away. I can't live in the past . . . I learned my lesson.

"We have to take one more cat with us, though," Sweetheart meowed. "Should I take an apprentice?" She tilted her head and Icetail shrugged. "I'll be right back," she said.

It's been a a quarter-moon since Dewfang had been exiled from MoonClan, and things for Icetail haven't been the same since. Day by day, Icetail was depressed. He had lost almost everything, all thanks to the darkness. Every single night he would dread what would be the next step for the prophecy, but he never got answers since that night he dreamt of Dewfang being the leader of a Clan.

He would never stop thinking about it, and would always take into consideration to talk to someone just like Silverpaw suggested he'd do, but Icetail couldn't bring himself up for dumping his problems on other cats. He felt that his scars were burning, that his battle wounds were re-opening, and he felt fearful that Dewfang would come out of the shadows to strike. He was scared to go near the borders of DarkClan. Nothing good ever came from that Clan. And worst of all, Icetail was upset about his destiny. I was destined to suffer, he thought bitterly. Nothing I do will make me better. Everything good I have is just taken away. I can't stand it!

Even in the midst of a Clan, Icetail felt fully responsible for a lot of things his Clanmates did not know of. He felt responsible to keep them safe, to keep them away from this darkness. He wanted to protect his Clanmates forever, and carry all their burdens so no one else can experience what he was feeling right now. That's why he was so depressed and so alone. Everything he did was a huge bargain.

Sweetheart returned with Silverpaw at her heels, cutting off Icetail's train of thought. "I asked Grayfur if Silverpaw should come with us, and she agreed," meowed the medicine cat. "Let's leave now that the sun is still high."

Icetail sighed and nodded. "Yeah, let's go."

He led them outside the entrance, and began making his way towards where the herb patch was. "You know where it is, right?" Sweetheart asked.

"I do," Icetail responded. "I've been there a few times as an apprentice." He kept on leading them. Icetail's ears pricked as he overheard Silverpaw's and Sweetheart's conversation. For once, Icetail wished that he did not have good senses.

"Is he okay?" Silverpaw whispered to Sweetheart.

"I don't know. He's been like that for such a long time. It reminds me of him when he was an apprentice and his mother was killed in battle," responded Sweetheart.

"I remember that time . . . it's faint, but it's near the time where Ripplefur died, too," Silverpaw responded. "He charged out of camp, and no one knew where he went for a long time, until he came back to camp unconscious. Nobody told me what happened. All the warriors were so secretive."

Icetail looked back to the two of them, causing them to stop their conversation. "What happened that day was the beginning of this war," he told her. "I was the one who started it."

Silverpaw looked embarrassed that he overhead her, but Sweetheart thought otherwise.

"Nonsense," said the medicine cat sympathetically. "DarkClan has always been like that. None of this has ever been your fault."

Icetail's head snapped back once more, and his eyes felt blurry and wet. "Ever since that day, nothing was right! Everything became worse and worse. The battle started because I killed Fallentail, and MoonClan never found peace because of my existence. It's been like this since I was apprenticed. It'll always be like this!"

"Icetail—"gasped Silverpaw.

Sweetheart's eyes were wide. "What's wrong, Icetail?" she whispered.

Icetail's claws dug the ground. "I can't take this anymore. All I want is my Clanmates to be happy, but nothing good is coming out for me."

"Icetail, stop this!" demanded Sweetheart. "I-I don't understand what you're talking about!"

Icetail looked up at the medicine cat. She had no cures for uncontrollable feelings. She couldn't possibly understand what he was going through right now. There's nothing that's going to stop the way he felt about the past recent events.

"I just want to die," whispered Icetail, his pelt shaking with agony. "I-I . . . I can't stand it anymore. I just want this all to be over with already!"

Sweetheart's eyes widened once more. "Please, don't talk like this, Icetail. Trust me, whatever you're saying is not true. Please, Icetail."

Silverpaw was speechless.

Icetail turned away from them, and pelted through the forest, hoping that they wouldn't follow him. He was engulfed with grief over his brother, and hatred was filling his heart. I just want to be alone. If I never show my face in MoonClan again, then every cat will have peace in their lives. I'm sure of it!

He didn't turn back at all as he disappeared in the forest. This made him feel even worse. He was running away from his problems, and he was being a coward. Nothing good was coming out of his actions, for what's done was done.

* * *

Icetail kept on padding through the forest, his ears alert. MoonClan was a familiar territory to him, but he did not know where he was going. He felt lost, and he felt that he was being watched. He regretted having that outburst in front of Sweetheart, especially in front of Silverpaw. He knew better than to make his Clanmates worry.

What I did was wrong, he thought with guilt. I'm such an idiot! Icetail sighed and sat down by a tree, watching the red and yellow leaves slowly descend to the ground. He needed to learn to be smarter. He had to. Nothing good ever came out of his actions.

"I saw that little outburst there," said a voice that Icetail did not recognize. He burst up from his spot. He didn't recognize the voice, but he did recognize the scent. DarkClan. What are they doing so deep in MoonClan's territory?

"Show yourself!" growled Icetail.

A cat emerged from the undergrowth. How have I not scented him, let alone hear him? thought Icetail with surprise. It must've been because he'd been distracting himself so much with thoights.

"That wasn't smart, what you did back there," the cat went on. Icetail studied his appearance. He was a gray cat, but with lighter fur than Icetail's.

"Whoa are you?" he demanded.

"My name is Graysoul," meowed the DarkClan warrior.

Icetail's claws unsheathed and he stood taller. His fur bristled. "Leave this territory at once," he ordered, "or I will attack you." He inched closer to Graysoul, cautiously. Icetail's ears were drawn back and his tail lashed.

"You should reconsider that," said Graysoul.

"Why should I?"

"Or else that little silver apprentice is going to get a good killing," Graysoul said bluntly. "You didn't think that I'd come here without a plan, did you?"

Icetail froze in his spot. Kill Silverpaw? He means it! "Where is she?" demanded Icetail. He knew now that Graysoul wasn't alone. Whoever this other cat is, he was with Silverpaw right now. I shouldn't have left them! he thought with anger. One wrong move, and either Icetail's or her life could be taken away. And what about Sweetheart? Where was she? I'm such an idiot!

"Don't worry about her," sneered Graysoul, taking small steps forward. "She's okay. For now."

Icetail looked down to the ground, defeated. "What do you want?" he demanded. "Why would you do this?"

Graysoul shrugged. "I don't know. Why would we do this?" meowed the gray cat. "It's all in the paws of Sandstar. She orders you to go back to your camp, take as many herbs as you can from the medicine den, bring them to me, and destroy the supply before my very eyes."

Sandstar wants me to do that because she wants MoonClan's warriors to become weak, Icetail realized with fear. She wants us to be sick during leaf-bare. With no medicine, no cat can be cured!

"That's so cruel," Icetail whispered.

"And," Graysoul went on, "you will meet us by the herb patch. As soon as you get there, you will trample the growing herbs. Understood?"

"Why me?" Icetail growled.

"Sandstar probably wants to make you feel like you were responsible for your Clanmate's deaths in leaf-bare," Graysoul laughed. "She's a humorous cat, you see. Nothing can be done without meaning behind it."

Icetail snarled. "Do you realize that once you let me go, I can bring my Clanmates with me to attack you?"

Graysoul shook his head. "Do you realize that doing something that stupid will put Silverpaw's life on edge?" he asked. "Sure, if I die, I'm taking that little brat with me."

Icetail bristled. What am I going to do? he thought with dread, looking around his surroundings. Realization hit Icetail on the head, as if StarClan was answering his prayers. "There is one flaw to your plan," he said, standing taller. "You're all alone. There's nobody stopping me from attacking you right now!"

Graysoul growled. "You wouldn't dare."

Without warning, Icetail leaped at Graysoul, pinning him down. "For my Clanmates, I will!"

Graysoul snarled, pushing Icetail off of him. DarkClan isn't all that smart! Icetail thought with a sense of victory in his belly. Especially for picking a fight with me inside the heart of MoonClan's territory!

Feeling more at an advantage, Icetail leaped overhead on the branches, and crashed down onto Graysoul's back. Using his surroundings as a weapon, Icetail remembered the intense battle training he had with Brightstar. For Silverpaw's sake, he can't lose this fight!

Graysoul yowled as Icetail sunk his teeth in his neck. "DarkClan . . . will avenge . . . me," sputtered Graysoul as the fire died away from his eyes. When he stopped moving, Icetail released the warrior and let him fall to the ground. Climbing off the dead warrior, he observed Graysoul with no remorse. It was either him or Icetail's life, and in this situation, Icetail couldn't die unless he knew his friends were safe. He was going to have to inform Brightstar of what had happened. Right now, however, was not the time to drag Graysoul's dead body to camp to explain the fight. No, now was the time to find Silverpaw. He also wondered about Sweetheart. Did she wander somewhere else? Is she safe? The only MoonClan medicine cat couldn't die, especially with no other cat in MoonClan who knew the ways of medicine. Since DarkClan was targeting MoonClan's medicine supply, fear entered his heart.

They couldn't have possibly killed her, right? he thought with worry.

Icetail fled from his spot, finding his way to the herb patch. He had to be swift but he also had to be silent. Looking up to the sky, he realized that the sun was setting. Soon it would be dark, and the moon would be out.

Icetail had no time to waste.