Y/n stayed at Jamison's all of Sunday, being fussed over by the boys to the point of feeling suffocated. She insisted time and time again that all she wanted, all she needed, was them to be there for her. After all, the girl planned to take the trauma inducing event and file it away until it disappeared from existence.

It was the perfect plan.

David was having none of that, instead forcing her to talk through it more times than she wanted to count. She'd recite it then cry then watch a movie. It was like clockwork all day until she finally told the story without crying. It was low budget therapy, but got the job done for now. Y/n suppose the constant build it this moment almost made it easier, as awful as that sounded. So did the fact that Donatello showed up out of nowhere to save her. The idea of having someone available to step in filled her chest with comfort.

She was still shaky, Y/n was willing to admit that much, but she didn't want to stop her life because of this. Fa and Ito were lowly scum of the earth, she decided, someone that miserable would not ruin her life. So, when she woke up one Monday morning with an invasion to get lunch for Karai, she pried herself out of David's arms and abandoned the men in the living room so she could get ready.

Life would go on; she would go on. She would note herself as the girl who broke a wanna be rapist's arm, not a victim, a fighter. The label filled Y/n with pride. It made her feel stronger than she was, braver than she saw herself, almost unstoppable. Gathering the feeling she made herself look presentable. Digging through Jamison's closet for the small bag of clothes she left with him, and beaming when she found a cute yet casual top and jeans waiting for her.

Changing fact, Y/n brushed and styled her hair, smiling in the mirror before leaving the bedroom. Rushing back to the living room she called out a goodbye as well as where she was going before either of the men could object. Purse thrown over her shoulder, Y/n almost ran down the hall to the elevator, afraid that her friends might chase her. She wanted out of the apartment. She was more than capable of going to lunch. She was strong damnit!

And she felt that way until she left the crowded streets of Jamison's black towards a quiet street that would take her straight to her and Karai's favorite lunch spot. The fastest way to get there was to rush through a three-block stretch in a sketchier part of the city. On a good day, this stretch made her nervous, but today the moment she passed the first alleyway, Y/n froze.

Her head turned to look down the dimly lit passage. A fire escape on the right, with a dumpster below it. Two side doors, one per building, and a dead end in the back. Near the entrance of the alley was a manhole cover that was slightly off kilter. Y/n's eyes locked on the metal circle for a few moments as her mind scrambled.

Why did I stop? She asked herself while trying to will herself on. Why can't I move?

That's when it hit her. She was afraid. Of what? There was nothing there. That alley was empty. It was just a dark alley. It was just a... A pain shot up her back. If left like she was getting slammed against one of those brick walls, but she wasn't near them. What the hell! This was ridiculous. Y/n looked down at her hand. She was shaking. She was afraid of the stupid alleyway.

Y/n wanted to groan in frustration, but she couldn't. No. The fear was too much. She needed to move.

The girl dug within herself for the confidence she had found previously and used it to press on. She was almost at the restaurant. Almost somewhere with people and artificial light and most importantly, her friend. Y/n all but ran. Only two blocks left. Two blocks that felt like two miles. By the time she arrived at the restaurant, her lungs burned. That shouldn't have been as strenuous as it was, but there was nothing she could do about it now. So, she chose an action she knew she could do. With a breath, Y/n forced a while and approached the host to acquire a table for two.

Not long after finding her seat, Y/n heard the bell of the door sing. Instantly she looked up. Strangers. Cute strangers, two women dressed in matching dresses giggling together. Y/n wonders if they are friends going out together like she and Karai are going to do. Except, she and Karai would never wear the same outfit. She was into more comfortable, lightly colored pieces while Karai was all tight fighting and edgy. Not that she was complaining. Karai gave her scary dog privileges. It made her wonder if walking past alleyways would be as hard with Karai by her side.

Y/n was still flustered by that. She wasn't that scared of anything the first time. Was she?

Closing her eyes, Y/n tried to think back to the time after Fa assaulted her the first time in her dressing room. She tries to think of when she felt scared afterwards. When she was alone her anxieties would peak, especially in her dressing room. She remembers the weeks of calling Karai or Jamie, or even David who was next door and just leaving them on speaker while she got ready for shows. That had long worn off though. And she was never frozen in fear. That first night, when it happened and a few after David stayed over, holding her, just like he and Jamie had done the past two nights. And just then, the same as before she already felt as if she could curl up alone in her bed and be safe.

She heard the door again, breaking her thoughts.

When she looked up this time, her heart melted. It was two young looking college students. A boy and a girl, both dressed a little too nice for the establishment. They looked beyond nervous and kept exchanging short glances. Y/n even though she saw the boy reach out for the girl's hand when they were escorted to the table only to pull away at the last minute. What a cute first date. He's afraid to even touch her that little bit.

In that context being afraid of touch was just adorable. Her mind began to wander. That was something else that came from her first assault. Y/n backed away from everyone except for David and Karai. She wouldn't even let Jamie's touch her shoulder for months. Part of her wondered if that feeling would return as well. Holding knot David and Jamie felt easy enough, as did being helped by Donatello, a person... turtle, that she didn't even know. He did save her though. Y/n wondered if she would be ok with someone she didn't know at all, or not as well, who wasn't there, if they would be able to touch her. Or would it be like last time where her stomach curled with nausea.

The bell again. She looks up. It's just Karai.

Wait.

Karai! Standing from her chair, Y/n lifted her hand in the air, waving it just enough to catch her friend's attention. The other woman turned to her with a relieved smile and swiftly walked to the table. Stepping out into the walkway, Y/n met her friend with a tight hug.

"Hey," Karai mumbled into her hair before pushing Y/n back just enough to scan her face. "I heard what happened, are you okay?"

"I'm fine Karai, I swear." Y/n managed to force a burst of laughter as she shrugged off the girl's worry. "Seriously! You should have seen the other guy."

"I heard." her friend smiled, thought it was small and almost teasing. "You broke his arm? Where did that pepper come from?"

"What can I say? I'm a certified badass." Y/n replied, a genuine smile stretching her cheeks. Karai laughed at this, giving Y/n an opportunity to step out of her arms and sit back down. "Now can we please talk about literally anything else. The past day and a half I have been being babied by the boys. I need some grown up girl bonding time."

Following her leave, the older girl sat in the empty chair across from her, resting her elbows on the table so she could create a support for her chin with her hands. "Grown up girl bonding time? That sounds like a porno title."

Y/n laughed so loudly that she worried she was disturbing other patrons. It seemed as if Karai was taking the request to talk about anything other than her weekend seriously. When she finally managed to calm herself, Y/n's cheeks were tinted pink with embarrassment, a quick glance around let her know that a few people were indeed looking at her as if she was crazy. Still, it was worth it, and Karai was inclined to agree. She liked seeing Y/n happy and made it her mission to keep her that way until the last minute when she would have to execute her part of the deal with the turtles.

Today was the day Karai had to tell Y/n what she knew and the danger she was in. She needed to get Y/n to call the turtle's friend.

But not yet.

She wanted this a bit longer. After all, Karai knew that for Y/n to fall off the map, she needed nothing keeping her there. That included Karai herself. This was their last lunch together for the foreseeable future. The last time the pair would be together. The last time she would see her best friend. And damn it, she wanted to remember her with that smile, laughing at a throw away joke.

So, as they ordered, waited for their food, and ate, the girls stayed on light topics of conversation. Anything that they could smile or laugh about. Karai rambled about a new sword, Y/n a pair of earrings she saw at a boutique. They talked about the boys, Jamie's latest show he got cast in (Book of Mormon) , David's attempts at learning string instruments (he's crashing and burning), even stray cats that live outside of Karai's apartment (She named him Neko, which Y/n said was lazy since that means she named the cat Cat.). It was easy. It was happy. It was damn near perfect.

Until Y/n looked down at her phone while laughing, making note of a new text that came in.

Davyboy: Have Karai walk you to your apartment after lunch, I have a surprise and some big news ❤️

"Walk me home?" Y/n suddenly asked, a smile still present.

"Of course," Karai smiled. "You're still at Jamison's right?" God she hoped the answer was yes, because if it wasn't that means her time is up.

"Well, actually, David just texted saying he has a surprise for me at our apartment." The younger girl said with a smile, but Karai's expression dropped as her whole body tenses.

Y/n saw the shift in Karai's mood in real time, causing her smile to stop. Silently, she tried to read the other girl's mind, but got nowhere. Karai was far too busy formulating how she wanted to address this. She started by storing out the known variables.

If David went back to Happen tower, he must have seen the note on Y/n's door letting her know that the renovations and repairs were done making it safe enough for her to move back in. On top of that David was supposed to be contacted this morning about his promotion. No doubt he will be talking to Y/n about that when they see each other. It was now or never.

"Y/n I have to tell you something important." Karai spoke, her tone suddenly becoming serious. Without warning she reached across the table and grabbed Y/n's hand in her own, the way she always does when she wants to provide comfort. "You know I love you and I would never lie to you..."

Y/n eyebrows pinched together with concern. "Karai what's going on?"

"The investigation is over; they know you helped Leonardo escape."

The other girl's eyes widened as her mind froze. Panic rang in her ears like a dull buzz making it impossible to form anything more impressive then, "What? How?"

"I don't know. But it gets worse." Her friend replied, caressing the skin of her hand with her thumbs. This was for the best, she reminded herself, as she forced out her warning. "I was contacted after what happened last Saturday from the hospital. Fa told me what went down, including that a turtle came to save you."

"Donatello..." Y/n whispered.

"My father and his associates now know the turtles are protecting you. They are like my father's worst enemy. It won't be long before someone is sent to hunt you down. I'll try my damndest to keep you safe, but you need to help me out here. Do you have somewhere you can run?"

"I...I..." she panics before looking at their purse. "I just might."

The silence that followed was heavy, but brief since the waiter soon appeared with the check. Karai was fast to grab it, pulling out enough cash to cover the meals and tip before standing and offering a hand to Y/n. She stayed seated, staring at it for a moment before reaching out herself. She let Karai pull her from her seat, and out of the restaurant.

They walked home in silence, but with every alley they passed, Y/n found herself pressing closer to Karai until their arms were linked and Y/n was all but hugging Karai to her chest. She had to admit it to herself. She was terrified. Even more now than before. Was it because she was walking slower? Because they were passing more? Or was it just compounded due to what she knows now. Someone is hunting her down. She's on a time limit. Either run and hide herself away or suffer an unknown fate by the end of the week. They passed another alley. Y/n buried her face against Karai's shoulder.

Her friend raised her free hand to Y/n's hair, soothing her as they moved. Soon enough, they were outside of Happen tower. The transition to a hug was simple. Karai simply turned her body and trapped Y/n in her arms. It was the longest, tightest embrace the pair had ever shared. Y/n could feel what it was as pain shot through her chest. This was a goodbye. Karai was leaving her. Like her mother, like her father, like Francoeur. Y/n pulled the other girl impossibly closer. When they finally lessened their grip, the girls lingered at arm's length, hands still on each other's skin.

"Get out of here as soon as you can. They plan to get you Saturday after work." Karai explained in a whisper. Worried that it's her last time she'll ever see the girl, she cups y/n cheek and pulls her forward. She wants to kiss her but changes her mind at the last minute and instead presses a kiss on her cheek though the corners of their mouths graze, the proof of it shown in the mark left by Karai's lipstick. "Promise me you'll stay safe."

"I promise Karai, thank you for everything."

A final squeeze of their hands was the final goodbye before Y/n entered the apartment complex and rushed to the elevators. He bounced on her toes the entire ride, trying to shake away her anxieties enough to force a smile for David. She needed to pretend to be ok, to leave him out of this until the last minute. She loved him too much to let him get involved. He thought the man made her heart clench harder. He would be the hardest to leave. After all, David was her only family left. Without him, she would officially be alone.

The thought caused her body to stiffen and ultimately freeze. It was like the alley all over again. She was afraid. Afraid of being alone.

Before that thought could settle too deeply in her mind, the elevator doors slid open. David was waiting right outside the life with a large smile stretching his cheeks. Without a word he grabbed Y/n's wrist, yanking her into the hall before going behind her and covering the girl's eyes. With simply prompting, she began to follow his lead, walking down the hall, the familiar way to their apartment doors. Patiently she waited silently as David rearranged himself to cover her eye with an arm as he reached for something. She heard a buzz followed by a cheerful ding, then David's arm moved away from y/n's eyes.

She inhaled sharply as she saw herself staring into her apartment, perfectly cleaned, and organized as if she had never left in the first place. Complete with the throw blanket she brought to David's tossed over the back of her couch. The repairs were done. It was ready for her to move back in. She knew where she was, this was her space. Yet it felt like a different planet.

"Ta-da! A completely fixed apartment!" David beamed then led Y/n into the place she previously called home. "Best part! All you gotta do is call and I'll be right over. My thumb print is already in the new keypad!"

Y/n giggled a bit at his excitement. "Why call? I can literally just cross the hall."

David suddenly went quiet as his grip around Y/n tightened. For a fleeting moment she could see his face before the man looked away, his expression made her stomach drop. She had seen this just minutes before. Karai had reacted this way at the restaurant.

David had bad news.

Y/n waited anxiously, staring at her friend, trying to prepare herself for whatever was to come. She was so focused on preparing herself, that she physically jumped when David spoke again.

"I... got a message today." He started, adjusting his grip to hold Y/n flat against his chest. A more secure grip that caused anxiety to shoot through her. From here, it would be difficult to run. "I'm getting promoted. Really, I'm not sure. It was a message directly from Mr. Okoru. He's sending me to attend a training camp I think. I um... leave Sunday morning."

Silence. That was the only reply he got. Y/n couldn't find any words. Her mind stopped, heart racing in her ears. The only family she had left... was leaving too. She was completely alone. Suddenly the arms she was being held in felt foreign. Nausea swam in her gut. She wanted to get away. She had to get away. Y/n didn't want him to touch her. Forcing her mind to focus she said the only words she could manage after struggling just enough for David to loosen his grip.

"Get out..." Y/n finally whispered while pushing out of his arms.

"y/n." David's voice was already broken. It only took two words. Or was it that fact that Y/n couldn't meet his eyes anymore.

"Get out." She said louder before falling into a crouch on the floor. Arms wrapped tightly around her middle while she screamed. "Get out! Get out! Get out of my house!"

"Wait Y/n, hold on a second." David tried to lower himself to her level, hand hovering over her shoulder as he tried to talk. "I know you're upset but..."

Y/n's head whipped up giving her friend a clear view of her reddened cheeks streaked with uncontrolled tears. "I said get out David! If you want to leave so badly then don't waste time wading around here. Just go!"

The man jumped back at what he saw. Y/n looked so broken. He wondered if this was really all because of him or if there was more going on. WAs the weight of Saturday night contributing? He couldn't tell, but he knew that he wouldn't make any ground with her in this state. So hesitantly he rose to his feet and backed towards the door.

"I'm sorry," David whispered as he finally left the apartment, shutting the door behind him.

In an instant, Y/n was on her feet and began to pace nails digging painfully into her arms. She was weak. She was scared. She was an orphan. She had no parents, no family, and now her friends were leaving one by one. She was alone. Y/n pulled at her hair, eyes clamping shut as she felt tears fall down her cheeks. This was too much. It's been too much. Working for the mafia! What was she thinking!? She should have left when she still could. She should have never accepted the gifts, any of them, especially not Leonardo. He was human, sorta, in a way. Not some little tank turtle, not that she would have been prepared to care for a tank turtle anyhow. What kinda crazy person just randomly buys pets for people, or kidnap in this case she supposed, but that was beside the point. It was irresponsible.

Almost as irresponsible as helping your pets run away into the night. But Leo wasn't a pet, he was a roommate. But should she really have let a roommate leave in the middle of the night through a fucking window? NO! But she did. Why? Well because when you love something you let it go, right? Did she love Leonardo? She had no fucking clue, but he was her friend, and she cared about his happiness, happiness that shouldn't have been found here. So, she should have never moped for letting him go! She should have never been upset about it to the point of threatening Fa, and definitely shouldn't have followed through.

Then again, Fa shouldn't have tried to assault her. Who was the real asshole here? HIM OBVIOUSLY! Jesus fucking Christ what was her point, Y/n huffed stopping her pacing as she tried to find where this started.

With TCRI. Losing that job, that explosion. Or was it farther back than that. Maybe when she was offered that job while signing the papers her father requested in his will. Papers that allowed TCRI to use his body for research. The man instantly invited her to work as an intern. Really inconsiderate timing, but she needed to keep busy, distract herself. That was where she messed up. All the way back in her senior year of college, nothing more than a dumb kid, hardly eighteen years old, mourning her father, wanting something, anything to keep her distracted. If she had chosen any other internship she could still be using her degree that she worked so hard for, still be making her father proud, living a normal life with no mafia, no goons, and no giant turtles taking over her mind.

Distraction! Her mind finally shouted at her. Y/n needed a distraction now! She was spiraling. Food, she decided. Was she hungry? No. Lunch was more than enough to hold her over, but God stress eating had some sort of magic she could really use right now. So, forcing herself towards the kitchen Y/n prayed that the repair guys had the common decency not to raid her cabinet. When she opened the first door however, she kind of wished they would have.

Right in the front of the cabinet were two opened boxes of tea bags. Y/n hated tea. No matter how many times people insisted she had some, claiming they could make it in a way she would enjoy the girl never did. This tea was Leonardo's. He added it to her shopping list the first time they sent it out. Green tea for the day, chamomile for the night. Reaching out she picked up the box of green tea and scowled. A voice in the back of her mind wanted her to cradle the box of teabags to her chest like a stuffed toy. It tried to convince her that the smell would bring the same comfort sitting beside Leonardo on the couch provided. No, she argued with herself, that's too sad.

If she wanted Leo, she would reach out to the one person who could help her get in contact with him. Help her escape the hell of her own making. Placing the box on the counter, Y/n fished her phone from her back pocket while rushing back to where her purse was thrown on the coffee table. Frantically she dug around until she found the index card Donatello gave her. Wasting no time Y/n dialed the number, bringing the device to her ear, listening to it ring.

And ring

And ring

And "Hello?" Her eyes widened when the dull tone was interrupted by the curious voice of a young woman.

"Um...hi, is this?" Y/n glanced down at the card in her hand, squinting to read the hastily written name on the top corner. "A-April?"

"Yes?" the woman, April, asked in response. "May I ask who's calling."

"Oh! Right! I'm Y/n." the other woman answered fast. That wasn't really an explanation though, so taking a breath the singer prepared to elaborate. "Um...Francoeur's, no wait, Leonardo's..."

Before she could finish her thought, April interrupted her with a newfound energy. "Holy Shit! Your Leo's Y/n?!"

She blushes at the idea of being Leo's but managed to respond. "He um... talks about me?"

There was a moment of silence before the woman relaxed a bout of uncomfortable laughter. "Well... he's kinda sketchy about it but he has told a lot about you." She explained quickly only to loudly clear her throat. "Anyway... how did you get my number"

"Donatello gave it to me. He told me to call you when I was... um..." Great, this girl seemed completely in the dark. Y/n was really hoping that one of the turtles would have at least mentioned that they had given her April's number, but apparently not. The singer tried to formulate a good way to explain without being overbearing, after all she's never met this woman. Biting the bullet, she chose a short and sweet explanation. "When I was ready to leave."

"Oh? Oh..." there was a glimmer of understanding in April's tone which gave Y/n hope. Maybe the turtles hadn't kept her completely in the dark. "Ok. Operation 'Leaving the Nest' is a go!"

Or she wasn't in the dark at all. "You have a code name for this?" Y/n asked.

April all but snorted. "Of course, we have to plan in advance with this crowd. Don't worry you'll adjust fast."

Together, the girls went over the plan. Tomorrow Y/n and April will meet up for lunch, Y/n should bring something small that has important items to her in it. Pictures or music or anything like that. A small bag they can pass off without looking suspicious. It would also give them a chance to meet.

By Wednesday she would need a large cardboard box packed full of anything else she wants. Aprils said she'd send another friend, some guy, to meet her outside a donation center. Y/n will bring that box to him, and he'll bring it to the turtle's lair as she was calling it. It will look like a large donation to her apartment's cameras. Hopefully, the two steps will be enough to get everything she might need out.

Y/n was prompted to leave on Thursday, but she instead asked to have until Friday. If David was being sent away, she wanted at least one more performance with him. April was hesitant, but the extra push to have time for Yn's personal affairs, specifically sorting out her money situation, helped her case. April agreed to Friday. She would pick her up from the club after work with at least one turtle, if not more. After that, she will be off the map, off the grid. Her phone will be broken, and Y/n would disappear into the night.

In total Y/n would have to pack up her life in a small bag, two if she felt like she could bring one with her to work without raising any eyebrows, and one box. It would certainly be downsizing, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. After all, she had nothing to lose, and her life to protect. This is important.

April said she'd fill the boys in so that they are prepared for her arrival, then hung up the phone with a final promise to meet her at a noodle shop in Chinatown tomorrow afternoon. The line went dead before Y/n could move her cell from ear. This was it. Her life was changing forever and there was only one thing on her mind.

She needed to apologize to David for shouting and kicking him out. Stealing her nerve, she crossed the hall to do just that. Tying the first loose end of her life so that when Friday comes she will be ready.

***

A/N

Y/n this chapter: If you have anxiety just throw it out the window

Self-Hatred, Out the window

That thing that reminds you of the traumatic thing that happened only two days ago, OUT THE WINDOW!