Present Day

It was the hottest day in August, ever. Okay, I don't know that for a fact, but it was stifling, and if it wasn't the hottest day, it was damn close. I knew it was going to be hot today before I even left the house. I mean it was August and that means heat, but I didn't think it was going to be like this. And it didn't help that I was surrounded by foliage deep in a forest that, at the moment, felt more like a jungle.

When I first got to the forest, I was elated to see all the trees. The trees were going to allow me to walk the whole way in shade, and shade was good, right? Of course, it was. But what I didn't know was with this glorious thick canopy of trees sheltering me from the overbearing sun came a not-so-glorious downside, in the way of blocking any sort of breeze. The air around me was still, humid, and thick. I could look up and see the tops of the trees move ever so slightly, but that lovely breeze never made its way down to me no matter how much I begged and pleaded.

My shirt had long ago soaked through and clung to my body like a second skin because my sweat refused to evaporate. I was in the middle of pulling it away from my skin and fanning it out to try to cool myself when I stumbled on a root. I was able to catch myself on a stump and decided now would be a good time to take another break. It wasn't my first break of the hike, but I was hoping it would be my last.

It's so hot. Came an interruption to my thoughts.

I just shook my head, and looked at my watch. I'd been hiking for an hour now, and while I didn't know exactly how long the hike was supposed to take, I knew I had to be getting close.

Why do you have to do this, Matty? Came the interruption again.

I ignored it, wiped my brow to try to stop the sweat from dripping into my eyes, and took a look around. It took me a few seconds, but I noticed a sharp incline not too far away. It represented the backside of the cliff, which was my true destination.

With the cliff being so close and knowing I was about to have to climb, I decided I could take a longer break. I walked over to a fallen tree of some kind and sat down. I know some people could tell you what kind of tree it was, but to be honest, I didn't care. I wasn't really here to enjoy the forest. To me, they were just trees that happened to be between the cliff and me.

I slid my camel pack off my back and sat it beside me on the trunk. At the beginning of the hike, it was heavy and weighed me down, but now, I was hoping to get another few good swallows from it before it ran dry. I was doing my best to stay hydrated because all I needed was a cramp out here in the middle of nowhere and have to hobble the rest of the way. I debated saving it for a few seconds and then thought to Hell with it and took a deep drink. And as I held it in my mouth to enjoy it, the interruption started again.

I hope you're happy, Matty. I really do. Damnit, stop ignoring me. Look at us. We're out here sweating our ass off. Why? So you can get rid of me for a few days. This is stupid, even for you.

I swallowed the mouth full and sighed in aggravation. "Why can't you ever just shut up, Spence?" I said.

Because you ignore me all the damn time. Maybe if you listened to me once in a while, I wouldn't have to keep talking.

"Listen to you? You're crazy. Why would I listen to you?"

I'm crazy? You're the one sitting in the middle of a forest, having a conversation with the voice in your head. You should take a hard look into a mirror before you start calling other people crazy.

"You aren't 'other people', dumbass. You're a voice in my head. But you're right. I am crazy. That is why I'm doing this. I just want you gone, and this is the only way I've found that will get rid of you. At least for a little while."

I heard him sigh, and start rambling on again. I just ignored him. Hell, I knew he was right. I wasn't exactly sane. Well, I didn't think I was, but didn't insane people think they were sane? So if I knew I was crazy, didn't that make me not crazy. I could really drive myself crazy thinking in these circles.

STOP IGNORING ME!

I just shook my head, stretched out my kinks, and sent a silent prayer for a breeze that I was denied. So with a deep breath, I set off again. By the time I made it to the incline, I was starting to breathe harder again. I looked up, and let out a long sigh. It was about a thirty meters climb, but the good news was, it wasn't straight up. The climb was angled upwards with small trees and roots weaving their way to the top like a forest-made ladder. Before I grabbed the first root, I knew this climb was going to be Hell because I wasn't in the greatest shape. I wasn't fat or skinny nor was I tall or short. I guess the best way to describe myself physically would be average. I fell more solidly in the geek category and that suited me just fine when it came to my normal hobbies of reading and playing video games. But when it came to physical activities, I could be found lacking.

I told you we should have been hitting the gym, but no. You wanted to play video games and read. Kind of pathetic. You should just give up and go home.

I let out a frustrated growl. "Shut up! I don't need your shit right now." I moved forward quickly, and grabbed a root and started half climbing and half hiking my way up the incline. The whole way he wouldn't shut up. He kept on and on. Every time I slipped or stumbled, he was telling me I wasn't going to make it, or that I should just give up before I got us hurt. He didn't care about that. He just wanted me to stop because he knew when I made it to the top I was going to get rid of him. I'd been planning this trip for over a month and there was no way I was giving up now. He might have thought he was discouraging me, but in all actuality, every time he said something, it just gave me the push to keep going.

It took me nearly fifteen minutes to get to the top, but I made it. I could see the sunlight up ahead where the trees stopped to give way to a rocky outcrop. I pushed the branches out of my way, and stumbled out into the sunlight. It took a few moments for my eyes to adjust to the sudden brightness, but when they did, what I saw took my breath away. Even Spence shut up for a few seconds. I stood atop a cliff, and all I could see was forest. It was stunningly beautiful. There was no sign of civilization, only a sea made of a mixture of green that moved and danced along the wind. The view stretched across the horizon where it met the sky in a stark contrast of dark green on light blue. The sky was filled with giant white clouds that moved lazily and seemed to climb to the Heavens. As I was taking in the view, a big breeze swept across the rocky outcrop, causing chills to run all over my body. I closed my eyes and let out a contented sigh. "Yeah, this had been worth it." I said with a smile. My body was suddenly re-energized, and I was given a second wind that I used to jump around and yell in celebration. I made my way over to the cliff's edge, and as looked down, I felt the thrill surge through my body. "This is going to be a great one."

You can still change your mind, Matt. You don't have to do this. You can turn around and we can just go home. I'll even be quiet on the whole trip home, I promise.

"Nice try, Spence. But I'm doing this, and I can have quiet for days." I was actually here for two reasons. One, as you know, was to get rid of Spence, but the second was to celebrate my graduation from high school and my last day at home. I wanted to do it right so I had to find a destination that was close enough to home to drive, and not so far into the forest that I would have to camp or be there all day. After a couple weeks of searching, I stumbled upon this little known cliff. The location was perfect. It was about an hour drive from my house, and had a little cemetery at the edge of the forest for me to leave my car. I had driven to the cemetery a couple of times and took short walks into the forest. The brief trips helped me get familiar with hiking in the woods in general. The biggest obstacle was keeping this from my parents and friends. I didn't want anyone to know what I was doing in the forest beforehand because it would lead to questions about why I suddenly wanted to take a hike in some random forest. But it wasn't the hiking or even the location that mattered; the only thing that mattered about this trip was the end of it.

I sat down on the edge of the cliff with my feet dangling into the open air. I wanted to relax for a little while and I wasn't going to let Spence ruin this moment for me. I finished off the water in my camel pack and took it off my back. I looked at it and for the first time, wondered if it would survive the trip. I knew my clothes would because they always did, but I had never done this with a backpack of any kind. I shrugged to myself and set it on the ground. It would or it wouldn't.

I stared out into the horizon and watched the clouds drift slowly, and watched any birds that flew within my view. I could feel Spence going on and on, but I had gotten pretty good at ignoring him when I was relaxed. It was like the more stressed or agitated I was, the harder it was to ignore him. Right then, I was very relaxed so he was a little more than a small buzz. It pissed him off, and if I wasn't about to get rid of him, I would hear about it later. I just didn't care right then so I let him get pissed.

I sat there until the sun made it unbearable even with the breeze. I stood up and put my pack back on. I took a couple of steps back and readied myself.

Matty, seriously. Don't do this. We can work something out.

He did this every time. He always pleaded right before. I never listened. I jumped up and down a couple of times with my arms swinging around me while taking deep breaths.

MATT! STOP! DAMNIT! DON'T DO THIS AGAIN! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO GO AWAY! PLEASE DON'T DO THIS TO ME AGAIN!

On my third deep breath, I shot forward, and on the second stride jumped over the edge.

FUCK YOU, MATT! I HATE YOU! I'M GOING TO GET YOU BACK FOR ALL THESE TIMES! WHEN I GET BACK, I'M GOING TO MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING HELL! YOU JUST WAIT!

The wind rushed by my ears. I kept my eyes open even though the wind dried them instantly. This was my favorite part. The part where I let go and there is nothing left for me to do. No turning back. Everything was set in motion. I felt the adrenaline surge through my body as my fight or flight response kicked in. The trees at the base were growing larger, and figured I was only seconds away from breaking through those trees and slamming into the ground.