Escape


The wings of shadow on my back swarmed me, absorbing my body whole, as though a magnet was drawing them out from the air. Once I was entirely consumed by shadow, as they pulled me through the fabric of space, swerving between molecules and magic and pneuma, before making me reappear back into the chaotic air of the council hall. I let them swarm around me for a moment, enjoying the way they rippled around me like a whirling current, tracing my fingers through the smokey essence, before allowing them to disappear completely.

With a flick of my hands, I dropped them, scattering them off my body and back into the darkness. I appeared in front of the remaining council members, standing amongst the rubble and debris of what remained of the glorious council hall. My smile widened viciously at the sight of them, battered and bruised, their blood painting the floor and the ridiculous thrones they once sat upon.

My mother was panting, her near-white hair falling into her face, undone from the tight knot she usually held it in at the back of her neck. One of her legs was dragging behind her, her white pant leg painted a shade of vibrant, lively red. It seems she had not been able to avoid the destruction. The sight of her was pathetic.

This was the woman I had been terrified of for all these years. This was the woman who I could not breathe around, the mere sight of her sending me into hysteria, my mind convulsing simply at the memory of her. This weakling of a witch.

My childhood terror had clouded my judgement, unable to see that the all-powerful monster who was once responsible for my childhood torments, was no longer. Back then, in her prime, she was vicious. Now she was simply weak. Or maybe she had always been weak, and it just did not seem so in the mind of child who could not fight back.

"Hello, mother" I called out to her, my eyes wide and smile even wider, wickedly delighted by the recent turn of events and shift of power. Wilhemine was grey, as if she had been painted in a cloud of debris, her electric blue eyes shocked.

"You" She growled at me, the singular word holding years worth of resentment and hatred. The shaking of the building stilled for a moment, tense.

"Yes. Me" I laughed maniacally. The sound was loud and garish in the now silent council hall. I suddenly choked on my breath, the laugh caught halfway between my throat as a wave of pain slammed into me, so violent that it nearly toppled me over. The raw smell of winter rapids, so cold that it burned my nostrils, hit me.

Ah. My mother wanted to play with magic.

The blood in my veins burned like acid, and I could almost feel the grinding of my bones beneath my skin, crushing to smithereens under an unfathomable weight. The pain did not sting, like the way my mothers magic usually felt; precise and venomous. Instead, this pain was simply aggressive and masculine, thudding into me like the feeling of a bruise. Wilhemine was becoming sloppy. She was weakened, no longer having the mental stability to launch her methodical attacks, so elaborate that they were inherently female.

I whispered the first counter spell I could think of, and felt as cool rushed my veins, the intense, forceful pain ending just as quickly as it had come. She was definitely weak. I should not have been able to subdue her so quickly.

"You think pain will stop me, mother?" I cackled at her, my eyes wild, "You think that one weak curse of yours will be enough to stop me?"

My shadows unwound the bloodied bandage from my disremembered pointer finger, dropping it to the floor. It fluttered through the air like a delicate ribbon, before revealing the mangled mess of my finger. I smiled at my mother as I lifted it up to her, displaying it proudly.

"You think I am afraid of pain? I cut through my own finger to free myself, mother. I gnawed through bone" I told her, revealing the finger as bloody proof. Her eyes flickered from the finger, to me, looking horrified. I could not decipher whether it was at the sight of my bloody digit, or at the sight of my deranged expression.

"No, mother" I cackled, "I embrace pain. Pain is liberation. Only through pain can one find freedom. It has to be earned" I seethed at her. She had not earned freedom. She had not suffered enough to deserve it yet.

Her mouth moved rapidly, her words inaudible. Again, she threw a curse at me. Something sharp and acidic. I could feel the sting of it move through the air, splattering droplets onto my skin and burning tiny dots of my flesh red, before my shadows successfully intercepted the attack. If the full weight of the hex hit me, my skin would have peeled off my muscle. I knew the hex well.

"But you have not earned it, mother. You have not earned liberation. You have not felt enough pain" I continued at her, approaching her slowly. Her eyes were wide and furious, and I allowed myself a moment to simply look at her. To simply observe the creature that had brought me into this world. The creature who was supposed to be my mother.

I observed her icy blue eyes, her pale, near-white, blonde hair, bone straight and long. I observed the way her hands shook in fury, and the way her pale skin nearly matched my shade of sickly grey. I observed the rage in her face, so familiar, so inherently mine, that It was as though I was staring into a looking glass. For a fleeting moment, I felt pity. I felt pity and rage, at would she could have been. At what I could have been, if not for her.

"Why did you do it?" I asked her suddenly, my voice having gone quiet, "Why did you choose me? Why did you give me away?"

Something victorious glimmered in her icy eyes, as a cruel, satisfied smile cut onto her lips. I could see her thoughts plainly on her face; she was proud that she at least had that over me. That I would never be able to shake that part of my past off of me, no matter how much power I gained, no matter how much I grew out of the child I once used to be.

"Truthfully?" She asked me, her expression vicious, "Because that was your purpose. Because you were created and brought into this world with the sole intention of being gifted to him"

I stumbled back, my eyes wide at her confession, but Wilhemine continued speaking, "Do you really believe I would have given him one of my true daughters? The ones I nurtured and raised and cared for, weaning them off my own body? Why would I do such a thing when I could simply give him a new one—one I had no emotional connection to. One created solely for that purpose, and that purpose only"

My stomach reeled on itself, a vicious cold seeping into my skin, burning my bones. I had heard of such things being done; spare daughters, created solely to give their spare parts to their sick siblings, but I have never imagined that this was why I was created. I had never imagined that my purpose in this world was so inconsequential, reduced to such a horrific intention.

My mother was nothing without her elixirs. My mother was truly nothing but a savage animal, desperate for another dose of power, never satiated.

"Is that the answer you wished for, Eulalia? Is that what you wished to hear?" She cackled at me loudly, the noise jarring and violent.

My eyes lifted themselves from the floor, and I observed my mother for several seconds, the silence stretching out longer and longer, till my mothers rabid laughter finally died down. She could not stay still, twitching from her overindulgence in elixirs.

My uncharacteristic calmness did not seem to amuse Wilhelmine, visibly unnerved by it her after several seconds of waiting for a reaction from me. I had always been violent and impulsive, never calm. My unpredictability scared her. I waited for her to cease her laughing, and when she did, I simply smiled at her. It was a cold, ruthless thing.

"Yes, mother. That is exactly what I needed to hear" I called out to her, my voice gentle.

Then I observed her terror, as I opened up a shadow portal behind me, great and swirling, and beckoned Chuda out of the inky, infinite darkness. I observed her face pale even further, when my expression went glassy again, any familiarity gone with my emotion. My shadows drained me numb, as I whispered out to her.

"You will earn your liberation now, mother. I will liberate you of your life" I said to her peacefully. She had sealed her fate with the confession. If only she had accepted me. If only she had accepted that I was her copy. That I was her daughter; a mirror of herself. Now we were both monsters.

Chuda stood behind me like an Aldrich horror, growling and looming over me. I reached up, petting her leathery side, feeling the rough, unnatural texture catch on my skin. Chuda ran a long tongue over her rows and rows of teeth, her mouth split open to display them proudly. I scratched her under her jaw, inches away from the razor sharp fangs.

"What have you done, Eulalia?" Wilhemine whispered out to me in horror, mouth ajar and twisted in terror as she stared at the beast beside me. Gone was her victorious expression. Gone was her pride. Her hands came up defensively, as she attempted to back away. One more desperate hex she threw my way. One more hex I destroyed with just a flick of my wrist.

"What you couldn't, mother" I smiled at her peacefully, before turning my back on her. Chuda moved forward, growing and emitting hellish noises from the deep of her throat. I screwed my eyes shut when the screaming began.

I could not bring myself to turn around and observe as my mother was being ripped to death. I knew this memory would haunt me. I knew I would come back to this moment many times in the future; in the form of nightmares, flashbacks, hallucinations, examining every detail from every angle. The worst memories always came back. But I knew I could not bear seeing it over and over again. It was the only way I could protect my mind from any further destruction.

As I walked away, the building collapsed around me. This time, there would be no recovery for this infrastructure. It would be destroyed completely. Nobody, and nothing would be recovered from it.

I had lied to my mother. Her death would not be long. It would not be particularly painful even, if not only for the few moments where Chuda would sink her teeth into her slender arm and rip it off her body. Wilhemine would die quickly, Chuda ripping her apart with deadly efficiency, the same way Aline Merengue died. I did not have the energy to release something worse on her. Something that would drag out her death. Something that would not lunge instantly for her throat and end her misery. I wanted the job simply done with, so I would never have to see her again. I needed that closure. I had earned it.

I knew my mother would not have given me the same courtesy. She didn't. She had planned on burning me alive. I would have suffered for a very long time, till sweet Death finally came to collect me, and she would have watched. She would have relished in my pain, my screams music to her ears—her harbingers of peace. But I could not bring myself to do it. I simply wanted her gone forever, so she may never again inflict pain upon me.

As the building collapsed around me, and the last of the screams ended, I pulled Chuda back out into a shadow pocket. My feet dragged on the floor as I limped out, my eyes offset as I stared into the distance, the sole survivor of the tragedy that occurred in this building. Blood would stain the earth here for a very long time. Rain would not wash it away. Behind me, chunks of ceiling fell to the floor, splitting open the earth after each step I took.

There was no other way. Wilhemine would not have let me live peacefully. She would have spent the last of her days hunting me down, unable to rest knowing that I was still out there somewhere in the world. Eulalia The Bane. Eulalia the Evil. The despicable, vicious chid that had been the destruction of her life. That was all I did; destroy. She was obsessive in her hatred of me because I was her. I wore the cruelty she did so well to hide proudly.

The building fully caved in on itself only after I had exited it. I did not stop walking as the crunch of forest floor was under my bare feet, stumbling on twigs and unearthed roots, wet from the snow. The sky was a heavy grey, as dusk settled over the horizon. The freezing, winter air did not register against my bare skin, though it turned my limbs blue. The blood on my clothing had frozen the fabric stiff. My hair, drenched in deep red, had stuck to the back of my neck and shoulders.

There was  just enough receding light left to illuminate the looming outlines of the black trees around me. Smudges of shadows moved between the darkness of the trees, where the light no longer reached, providing more and more domain to my darkness. The icy air stung my nostrils as I inhaled the crisp oxygen. Something alive was writhing within the shadows. I continued walking, eyes dull, following in the direction of where I sensed my ring.

A great, heaving crash resounded in the distance, the earth shaking below my feet from the impact. The council hall had collapsed completely. I did not know how long it would take mages to unearth the destruction. They would never find my mother, nor me. My shadows ensured it. They would believe that we both perished in the collapse. It was the only solution.

Finally, after an eternity of walking, I broke through the brush into a clearing by the road, and found the source of my magic; Paris standing with the twins, Luca, and Ibet, the ring with my magical signature on his ring finger. Paris' eyes were red, and so was his nose, though the latter was from the cold. A cut was on his upper lips, deep enough that I was afraid it would scar. His hair was an overgrown, disheveled mess of curls, as the wind tussled them aggressively.

Ibet looked grim, her lips pursed. Clair had deficiently been crying, though he had the decency not to be drunk this time, and I could not read Cesarie's stoic expression, as the wind blew her black hair around her face. Her gold eyes were hazy. I could not bring myself to even look at Luca. At my brother. I could not bring myself to confront what damage I had done already, in our new life as siblings.

I did not ward my mind as the last of my thoughts faded through my mind, and watched as the twins eyes lit up in shock, the gold within them involuntarily glowing at the acquired information. The specks of golden light swirled in their irises for a moment, before settling back to the way they were moments before. Clair's face crumpled even further, and Cesarie's bottom lip quivered, despite how hard she pursed them and tried to keep her head lifted high, refusing to look me in my eyes.

They were all dressed in heavy clothing, appropriate for the blistering cold weather outside. Ibet had a wool scarf wrapped around her head, an unruly curl falling into her face. My bare limbs ached, still in my cotton shorts and tank-top, my feet bare. Paris was the first one to react.

"Eulalia" Paris gasped out, an immeasurable amount of relief audible in his voice. He ran to me, embracing me in his arms tightly, lifting me off the ground. His frozen zipper stung my skin as he pressed me to his chest. I did not reciprocate. I did not move at all, for I found that I could not do so even if I wanted to. I could not lift my arms.

I wanted to collapse into Paris' chest. I wanted to break down, knowing that he would hold me together as I unraveled. But I could not move. Inside I was screaming. Sobbing. Wailing. Beating my fists against his chest. In the real world, I was paralyzed. I could not speak. I could only stand there, as Paris tried to elicit some kind of reaction from me.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, it processed to me that I was free and that I was with Paris again. I realized that this should be a significant revelation. I was trying to get outside. I was trying to get free. I knew this, and yet I did not have spirit to rejoice. I couldn't focus on anything but the emptiness coursing though my numb body.

I cringed as Paris suddenly dropped down, and picked up a red back pack off the forest floor, the bottom soaked through from the snow. He placed something cold over my head, allowing it to fall to my chest. I glanced down and saw a black, leather cord, a clear pain-relief crystal attached to it. It was one of mine, from my collection of healing properties. The same collection that had been destroyed.

I looked up at him curiously.

How? Everything from my supply was ruined, burned to ash by Legion soldiers. Where did he find it? Understanding glinted in his eyes.

"It's the one you gave me when I got hurt" Paris quickly clarified for me, rubbing his hands up and down my arms to increase circulation, "After you got subdued by the soldiers with their staffs, I got scared and went back for a medical kit. Obviously Fate was warning me on what was waiting for me inside the cell" he cringed at me, shrugging off his jacket and laying it over my shoulders.

My hand erupted in pain at the mention of my finger, bringing my attention back to it. I suddenly remembered my finger was now uncovered, having unwound the bandage in front of my mother, and felt violated by the cold air against it, though the crystal muted the pain quickly enough. It was efficient and worked wonderfully because it was mine. So much of my talent had been wasted, destroyed in that fire. My heart ached with an unbearable weight.

"If I had known you would do that to yourself, I swear I would have come for you first, besides going back for the kit" Paris' voice broke. I closed my eyes, lifting a hand and resting it on his forearm in an attempt to stop him. I attempted to give him a comforting squeeze, but realized my hands were immobile, so I simply rested it on his arm limply. It wasn't his fault. Nobody was responsible for any of this besides me.

I shook my head at him. It didn't matter now, either way. Nothing mattered anymore.

Ibet walked up to us, her footsteps crunching in the snow, before planting herself right in front of me. Her mouth was set into a firm line, as she bent down to meet my eyes, her green ones flickering from eye to eye. My gaze unfocused, unable to keep my sight from hazing over, and Ibet grabbed my face to keep my attention on her, holding me gently. She eyed me from head to toe, observing all my wounds with a grim seriousness.

"Oh, Eulalia" she whispered to me, looking over me and my missing finger tip, "I am sorry. I am so so sorry. You deserved so much better" she whispered to me, her eyes glassy. Her expression did not change; it was as stoic as always, yet I could not miss the water brimming her lash line. We stared at each other for a long moment, understanding passing between us as she pressed our foreheads together.

After a moment of attempting to collect her composure, she straightened up and snapped in the twins direction, "You two. Come here and help her speak"

Her words were once again strong and authoritative when she spoke to them. The twins jerked forward at her command, as though tugged by string like little puppet soldiers. While they made their way over to me, Ibet unwound the thick, wool headscarf from her head. The boys shied their eyes away respectfully, finding the sky or ground eternally more interesting than the sight before them.

With steady, calm hands, Ibet wove the warm fabric around my shaking body. I was considerably smaller and shorter than her, so the fabric drowned me, swaddling me from my head, wrapping around my shoulders and down my torso, like a cloak. Instantly, I could feel the warmth sinking into my limbs, enchanted in some way or another to keep the wearer warm. When she was done covering my body, Ibet threw her own hood up, tucking her hair into her sweatshirt.

Only after she was done, did the twins, linked in arms, attempting to keep each other strong and standing as a united front, appear beside her. Clair's jacket was unzipped, and I sighed, pulling forward and zipping it up for him.  Cesarie's watery eyes were raised to the sky, her deep, bruised eye bags stark against her pale skin.

'It's okay, Cesarie' I sighed out mentally, attempting to comfort her. Cesa shook her head, refusing to listen to my thoughts. Clair met my eyes instead, and my legs buckled. Still gripping his jacket in my fists,  I sunk down on to my knees, finding that I could no longer hold my body weight up. A spell of dizziness hit my head. Cold snow and pointy twigs dug into my bare, scraped raw knees. Clair sunk down with me, holding me stable.

His mental presence was gentle in my mind, 'Ignore her. She's not doing well'

He cringed suddenly, obviously being lashed at by his sister. Whether or not Cesarie wanted to, she would have to hear my thoughts. Her resolve would always be unmaintainable if her twin was not standing with her.

Clair pulled back and met my eyes nervously, his expression twisting into something pained, 'We...we heard your thoughts. When you first came out of the forest and dropped your wards. It was...intense. It hit her harder than me"

I nodded at him. It made sense. Cesarie always bore more mental weight out of the two of them. She always had more influence, and her powers always affected her more intensely than Clair, because she had access to more of them. Cesarie took the blunt load for him, and now could not look me in my eyes because just that singular glimpse into my mind had been enough to horrify her.

'I'm avoiding your eyes because I don't want to hurt you further by invading your mind, Eules. Not because I'm scared of the pain' Cesarie suddenly barged in, interrupting my thoughts with her presence so loudly, that it was as though she had shouted into my ear. I startled, jerking backwards.

She shot a withering look at Clair, before turning back to me, 'Being in your head just now, was like standing in that crowd when they were forcing out your memories, your pain amplified into every one of their screaming minds. It was the equivalent of feeling everyone's misery all at once, hearing their wailing all around us, and being unable to do anything to block it out. Why would I want to add more pain to that, knowing how much you have already endured and hold within you?'

She sent an infuriated look at Clairmont, golden eyes raging and looking all the more severe under the precise line of her black bangs, cut just above her arched eyebrows, 'And forgive me for over estimating the capabilities of my moron younger brother to be decent for once and stay OUT of your mind. Common decency is sadly not common enough. Just wait till we get home, Clair'

She seethed, smacking him upside the head, standing over us. He stumbled up, looking shocked at her outburst, as if he could not read her mind and feel her violent intentions.

"What is she saying?" Luca asked out, breaking the thick silence around us. I realized that as the twins and I were conversing back and forth, a heavy quietness had settled in the air. The twins were now glaring at each other, leaving me excluded from their mental stand-down.

"We would know if they gave her a chance to speak" Ibet replied, her voice unamused. They twins stopped their mental bickering—a sight that Ibet and I had grown accustomed to observing for many years—and looked back at her sheepishly. Of course she could recognize that they were arguing. She knew us all well enough.

Luca came up to me, and I observed his expensive sneakers crunch through the thick snow, ruining them. He leaned down and offered me a hand, helping me back up to my feet, as my head spun and his shoes duplicated in my eyes. Four pairs, then six, then two once more.

"You alright?" He asked me, holding me up. I nodded wordlessly, attempting to catch my breath. I leaned into his warmth, as he held my arm tight. After a few moments, I unwound myself form him, stepping back.

"So where do we go from here?" Paris asked, and everyone turned to me, waiting for my solution. I did not know if they did it purposefully or not, but I simply stared back at them, my expression blank. I did not have a solution for them. I was spent, my soul drained empty.

"We have safe houses" Cesarie pitched in, "She could go there till everything calmed down"

I shook my head at her, 'I can't hide forever. All long as the bureau of magic is concerned, I'm dead. My best solution is simply leaving for good'

"You can't just be on the run forever either!" Clair outraged shouting, "You can't just leave forever!"

I cringed back at his loud words and flailing arms. Instantly, Paris was beside me, allowing me to tuck myself into his side, shrinking into myself.

"Why won't she speak?" Luca asked the twins in a quiet voice. The twins looked at me expectantly, their movements synchronized, their epicene faces curious.

'My mother may have cursed me' I thought out to them, 'During my first trial, she took my ability to speak the truth away by destroying my memories. During this trial, she could not do that, so she may have simply cursed me to loose my speech, so I could not speak'

"She thinks her mother may have cursed her so she can no longer speak. She did something similar during her first trial, so Eules could not speak the truth" Cesarie spoke out.

'Or this is simply some form of a trauma reaction. I do not know yet' I thought out.

"Or she may be traumatized!" Clair announced to the entire ground, feeling satisfied with his contribution to the conversation. I closed my eyes, inhaling a deep breath. Ibet rubbed her temple, sensing an oncoming headache.

"Thank you, Clairmont. You have the sensitivity of a toad" I sighed out, my voice hoarse, "Curse over"

Luca choked out a startled laugh, almost unwillingly, and Paris exhaled a sigh of relief, practically deflating behind me.

I inhaled a lung full of oxygen, before beginning, "I have my own safe house that I can go to. I can't stay in yours, because I have two full grown demons on me that I need to be released into the wild. This experience has shown me that I can no longer care for them, when there are constant threats to my life. They will starve to death and perish if I can't feed them, and I cannot hold that on my conscious"

"Two?" Ibet asked me, her thick eyebrow arched. I nodded at her silently.

"I knew about the first one, but I didn't truly think you were responsible for the hell beast in the school" She stated. Paris and I stiffened at the same time.

"Of course you knew" I sighed out. Of course Ibet knew. Ibet knew everything, and observed far more than she let on. I was only surprised she managed to keep it to herself for so many years.

Everything was falling apart. All of the well kept lies, each one a tidbit of a different truth, meant  to keep my friends from putting together the entire picture, were now falling in place. There was no point in hiding anything any more. I could no longer protect them with plausible deniability, because everyone already knew about my demons now.

"I'm not responsible for the Chudovische that was in the school" I clarified for her, wrapping my shivering arms around myself and leaning back into Paris, winded from just standing in one spot, "But it is now under my control. I am containing it with my other beast"

There was a long heavy silence, dragging on for several awkward moments as my friends attempted to digest this information, before Cesarie outraged, "I knew this. And because I knew this, Clair obviously knew. And it turns out Ibet already knew about Beastly, and so did Paris, though he learned it relatively recently. So what about you?" She swiveled around and jutted a finger into Luca's chest, who was noticeably calmer then he should be, "Why are you not freaking out?"

Luca simply shrugged at her, "I once caught her stabbing Paris to death down In the necromancy halls. I came to terms with her being a murderer that night,  but then it had turned out to be a fully grown demon that she was simply disposing of. If she could summon monsters of that degree, and spent her free time doing that, then I knew there was lots more I did not know about her"

"And you were okay with it?" Ibet asked him in her serious tone, one eyebrow arched inquisitively. I was as much interested in his response as her.

Luca shrugged at her, pushing his tan hands into his pockets, "She's my sister. She's always been strange. Plus, I would rather her be a demon summoner than a murderer. There would less messes to clean up with the former"

He smirked an impish smile, looking far too pleased with himself and his reply. Ibet's eyes lit up in surprise, but she did not display any more emotion, her reaction limited. She must have known somehow. She must have noticed the resemblance between Luca and Bronwyn—one I was too blindsided by my hatred to see, and had her own suspicions.

"You know bloody well I leave no messes to clean" I grumbled out at him defensively. I had been summoning demons since I was eight. My skill of leaving no traces was faultless, and he knew that. I never needed his help in cleaning up anything. His solution to such matters was just burning everything to a crisp with his powers.

"You could stay in the library, Eulalia" Ibet finally spoke up, her eyes stormy with the prospect, attempting to think the details through.

The Abbassid Archives were what was left of the Library of Alexandria. It was hundreds of feet underground, in a great sandstone cavern, locked up under their palace like a tomb. There would be plenty of places to hide in there.

"Time passes differently in the library" Ibet said, her voice low, "It is cursed to do so, to protect it from outsiders. You could spend a few days in the archives and years would have passed in the mortal world. By then, everyone would have stopped looking for you"

The hair on my arms stood up at the prospect. It would be heaven to remain tucked away in the library, with nobody coming in and nobody going out, isolated from the rest of the mortal world as I spent my days reading. Even if the Legion wanted to look in there, they would not be able to, for only the family members of the Abbassid Caliphate could enter the library. Which is exactly why I could not let Ibet take such a risk for me.

"Though the concept of being surrounded by books all day, and spending my days acquiring knowledge, sounds like heaven to me, Ibet, you know I can't. You are not allowed to bring outsiders in even for a visit, much less a harbor a criminal in it" I sighed out at her. It was the best hiding spot that any one could ever offer a person who needed to disappear, but it would condemn her. I do not even know what the punishment would be for violating her covens singular, biggest rule. Also, the prospect of being locked in there for years, with no way out, terrified me.

"Oh thank Gods" Paris sighed out from behind me. I shot him a look, one eyebrow raised. Paris had always been defensive of the library. He had been outraged at the possibility that Ibet could allow my Dark Practitioner self entry in, and let me wreak havoc with the knowledge I acquired In there.

"Don't worry, Paris. I won't get my grubby, heathen hands on the information in that library just yet" I said to him, partially mocking, partially attempting to comfort him. He blinked at me, surprised.

"Eulalia" He began in a serious tone, explaining to me slowly, "If you went into that library, you would not be able to come out for years. We would be separated for years. I don't think I'd be able to live like that"

Oh.  I stared up at him eyes wide, face hot, and eyes suddenly stinging, attempting to swallow the knot in my throat,  till one of the twins made a "bleh" sound, snickering with Luca. I snapped my head towards them, my expression twisting into fury, and eyes narrowed into slits.

Grabbing one of my shadows from mid-air, I slammed It against a pine tree, and watched as a heap of snow fell on them, sparing only Ibet, who was smiling slyly. Cesarie shrieked and jumped back, making my lips twist up into an evil grin.

"I can't go there, Ibet. Thank you" I looked into her eyes, reaching forward and grabbing one of her hands with both of mine. She gave me a solemn nod of the head, her lips pursing in concern.

I did not release her hand as I turned to the rest of the group, "I have a safe house with an old friend. One that changes locations periodically, designed to specifically evade Legion soldiers"

"It better not be that suspicious supplier of yours" Ibet interrupted, outraged at the fact that I would rather go to the slums of magical society besides staying in her infinitely safer, more secure library.

"Your Light Mage is showing" Clair said in a sing-song manner.

"You know it is not about that" She snapped at him, gesturing to me, "She comes back in bruises every time she goes on a excursion there. She would be safer with me"

"It's next to the Woods of Night" I said in a quick breath. My words silenced their bickering.

"What have you lost in the winter woods?" Luca asked me quietly, his amber eyes concerned.

I could understand his fear. You did not enter the forest of Nyx with more mortal blood than demon. This forest was not meant for humans. It was known. That was why the outcasts of mage society established Witch Salem there; most of them had too much demon in them to be accepted as even humanoid beings, and could not integrate into society. Those woods were their domain.

I inhaled a deep breath, "Somewhere in those woods is a portal to the Underrealm. The realm of Nyx. The Chudovische belongs there. I must release her back where she came from. I cannot care for her the way I believed I could. These recent events have proved that, when I was locked out of my magic"

"What about you?" Clair asked in a small voice, his eyes wide and mouth ajar, looking lost as he stared at me.

I gave him a small smile, "I'll manage. We've always known that I'm more demon than girl"

Ibet turned to me, an angry expression on her face as she hugged me tightly, squeezing my already hurt body.

In my ear she whispered to me, "I know I will not be able to convince you not to go, but please, know that I will be waiting for you to come back to me. There will always be a place for you and I in the archives"

She hugged me for a very long time, before finally drawing back, "Don't you dare go and get yourself killed and leave me waiting for you. I love you with all my soul. Please keep yourself safe"

When she released me, I felt dizzy and warm, and quickly realized what she had done. She had taken the opportunity to sink healing magic into my skin while holding me for those several long moments. I looked at my arm, and watched as the deep red wound stitched itself together, new, pink skin reaching forward over the gash in my flesh, and covering it slowly in scar tissue. My finger did not heal like my wound did, but I observed as magical bandage materialized and wrapped itself around it once more. I looked up at Ibet with warmth in my eyes. The rest of my friends had taken this as their cue to say their goodbyes.

Clair stepped up next, pushing everyone out of the way impatiently, with tears brimming his eyes, "Is this the last time I'll see you?"

I gave him a soft smile—half-hearted and weak. I did not know.

"You'll be alright" I said to him gently, brushing his black hair out of his face. Clair pulled me up into a hug, and I wrapped my arms around him, hiding my face in the crook of his neck. I held as tight as my wounded arm allowed myself too. Clair gave me a kiss to my temple, soft and gentle.

When he finally placed me down, Cesarie took her turn hugging me, though she did not say anything. Her lips were pursed and her red-rimmed eyes were watery.

I could tell she was doing everything she could to keep from openly crying. She did not say anything to me, only brushed a whisp of her magic—softer than anything I had ever felt before—against my wards as a farewell.

"You are my soul sister, and I will not be whole again without you" she whispered to me, before crumpling into herself and withdrawing.

Luca walked up to me next, his signature crooked smile on his lips, though this time it lacked conviction, "Well there goes our sibling bonding time"

I gave him a tired laugh, "We can make up for it later" I told him with a small grin. Only when he pulled me into a hug—the first in many years— did I feel my throat close up, tears brimming my eyes. He smelt of smoke and sandalwood and ash, with some tinges of singed hair from when he got too angry. His heat sunk into my body, through my clothes, making me radiate a toasty warmth even after he had placed me down to the ground. One last parting gift.

And then I turned to Paris, who was staring at me with his familiar green eyes. With a look in his gaze that I could not decipher.

"What? I'm coming with you" He told me after a long, dreadful moment of anticipation, and a heaving relief crashed into my chest. I should have told him no. I should have told him that a Light Mage has no business in the woods of Nyx, and that he should stay home. But I could not bring myself to. I chose to be selfish, because I could not bear the thought of going without him. I couldn't not bear the thought of separating myself from him ever again.

So I simply smiled at beautiful, selfless Paris, and said, "Good. I wouldn't have it any other way, my love"






A/N- Hey guys, sorry about the gorey chapters💀💀 I wrote them all when I was mentally ill and an in an extremely sad and dark place. Now I'm not so much, but I don't feel like changing it because I would have to change the entire plot (bc everything is connected) so I'm sitting here reading it like :((((. Im being traumatized right alongside y'all. Seventeen year old me really was something else💀💀💀 WHO EVEN THINKS OF THAT KIND OF STUFF?? Hello? Someone needed psychiatric HELP💀💀 LOL, love you guys tho💗💗 Thank you for reading!! -Amy

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