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Third Person

It was many years after the incident. Leslie was a reminder to everyone that ads were among us. That they were sentient.

Leslie was actually programmed alongside another ad.

Y/N.

They were designed as...sisters.

Y/N was a student at South Park just like Leslie, though they never hanged out.

They just...acknowledged each other.

That was until PC Principal caught Leslie chatting with her friends.

Y/N felt anger, but not that sisterly love. She didn't feel vengeance. She only felt...like she was now the only one rather than losing a family member.

She had one target: Jimmy Valmer.

One of the few who could distinguish ads alongside PC Principal.

Ever since PC Principal killed a bunch of ads in a random bar, Y/N was very careful of what she said.

So much so, she dared tried being human.

Emotions over voice cues.
Friendship over advertisement.
She tried believing it wasn't blue nano bots, but red blood flowing under her skin.
Her skin, not her carapace shell.

As a beta model, she gained self-awareness and became independent, unlike the state of the art ads of now where companies have direct control.
This made Y/N question who she truly was.
After years of using school to distract herself, her mental conditioning on her programming made it possible to defy her instinctual orders. Which is funny...who ordered Y/N?

South Park High

"H-H-Hey Y/N."

"Hey Jimmy," Y/N greeted.

"L-Look, the n-n-news paper business has gone swell. But now, i-it seems a-as if I need some h-help," Jimmy and his stutters. Like Tweek without the shouting.

"Okay. What do you need help with?" Y/N wonders.

"I w-was w-w-wondering what p-policy I should go over at o-our school."

"Maybe the student council, or some fundraiser or something. Maybe where a third party is involved."

"G-Great thinking Y/N. Say, w-wanna hang out s-s-some time?" Jimmy and his bobbing head.

"What time suits both of us best?" Y/N said while getting my phone out.

"I'm free this whole w-week, actually."

"Cool, guess I can just come over anytime?" Y/N suggests.

"Great! See you later Y/N! See you s-s-soon," Jimmy's crutches and their metallic sound slowly goes out of hearing range.

Y/N sighs. Her human attitude has bought her more time.

"HEY Y/N!" A loud masculine voice shakes the lockers.

"MY OFFICE, NOW!" PC Principal stands at the opposite end of the hallway.

Office

"Alright Y/N, know why I brought you in here?"

Y/N imitated a scared tone.

"No..?"

"You remember Leslie, bro?" PC Principal takes off his sunglasses and puts them hanging on the back of his head.

Shit goes down.

"Yeah. Black-haired girl. Usually wore yellow...what about her?"

"You see, Y/N. Her species took PC and gave it a bad name," Principal stood from his desk and walked around the borders of the office.

Y/N stayed silent.

"You don't think I know your game, Y/N?"

Y/N looked at PC Principal with a scared impression, for a shocked look would throw a bunch of red flags.

"You've been a good student, Y/N. I've always wondered what exactly is your relationship with...," PC Principal turns his back to Y/N.
"Jimmy Valmer?"

"We're friends..." Y/N twiddled her thumbs.

"Good friends?"

"Yeah."

("Do you...live together?

Are you her(his) little...*cough*...bed bug?")

"I see. Because as you should already know, I have been in some tough times several years back. Jimmy was...part of it."

Y/N stayed silent. One wrong move and her existence is over.

"Get me some info on this kid, kid. He knows something I don't. I must understand his secrets."

"What secrets, Principal?"

"His ability to distinguish ads from people! Ever since the incident at the gun show, I've devoted my life into hunting down ads," PC Principal starts walking to his shelved weapon collection.

"I know I can't get rid of ads alone. I need support. You'd understand right? I know your tired of ads and just want regular ol' news right?" His hand rests on his blue-goo-stained pickaxe.

"Of course, PC Principal," Y/N gulps with fear.

"I can't ask him myself. I've got to be hunting down by...ummm...I shouldn't say too much. This secret is between you and me. Got it? Also, I'll fill out your race/ethnicity on your character sheet whenever you play superheroes."

That last part didn't really matter to Y/N but whatever.

Y/N dared not ask why it was her responsibility. But she also realized that not asking why it was her job could signal inhumane action. Instead, she found a brilliant source.

"May I be excused now?"

"Of course, Y/N."

Y/N internally sighs relief and starts making her way home.

Jimmy's House

"H-Hey Y/N! Nice of you t-to come-come on over," Jimmy smiles with redness in his face as Y/N stood before him.

"Oh hey Jimmy," Y/N tried acting cute by turning her head one way and placing her hair behind her ear said side. (Remember to look down too.)

"W-W-Well come on in," Jimmy got out of the way so that Y/N could enter in.

"What should we do?" Jimmy asked.

No way Y/N could ask how Jimmy uses his communication skills to define ads from people now.

"Let's go to your room. Somewhere private. I want to say some words to you."

"Sorry, what was that?" Jimmy looks up from his phone.

"Really Jimmy? I'm right here."

"S-Sorry Y/N. My p-parents are c-coming soon," Jimmy stands embarrassed.

"Oh, okay."

"W-W-Will you be staying for dinner?" Jimmy asks with a smile.

"Sure! I'd love to stay!"

Bad mistake. What kind of word choice was that?

"Uh..Y/N?"

"I m-meant to s-say that I'd enjoy your hospitality. But I wonder if your parents would be cool with that," Y/N hoped for the best.

"S-Sure," Jimmy says with narrow eyes.

"Truth is, I've been having my eye on you for some time," Y/N changes topics, but smoothly.

"R-Really? Y-You know I've been thinking about you and me together," Jimmy blushes.

"But there's something you should know about me," Y/N says in a gloomy tone.

"I am an..."

"Hello Jimmy!" Mr. Valmer and his wife enters in.

"H-Hey Mom and Dad!"

"Oh, is this the girl you keep mentioning us about?" Mrs. Valmer holds her hands in a sweet way.

"C-Come on Mom! Don't be saying that! You're embarrassing me!"

Y/N giggled at the commotion. Maybe she'll tell him later.

Dinner

"I really like Y/N! She's a ver-"

"Jimmy," Mr. Valmer spoke. "You're thinking with your dick."

"I am not!" Jimmy retaliates. "Y/N is very loving and-"

"Put your dick down Jimmy."

"I am not talking with my dick!"

"Put it down Jimmy. Put it down."

Jimmy scoffs and gives up in anger.

....

....

"So Y/N, you like Jimmy?" Mr. Valmer asks Y/N.

"I really do like him. He-"

("PUT YOUR DICK DOWN Y/N. PUT IT DOWN.")

"Okay then Jimmy, I guess you weren't talking with your dick."

"See Dad! Me and Y/N like each other," Jimmy smiles.

I smile back.

"How cute!" Mrs. Valmer squeals.

"Personal question Jimmy," Y/N asks.

"What is it, Y/N?" Jimmy responds.

"How'd you get crippl- I mean, handicapped?"

"Mom and Dad made fun of handicapped kids in school. So God taught them a lesson."

"Really?" Y/N said in disbelief.

"It's true," Mr. Valmer secures Jimmy's answer.

"Damn..."

Later

"This is my room! I don't get visitors often, so it's a bit messy," Jimmy closes the door behind Y/N once they both got in.

"Nice place," Y/N looked around.

Then, Y/N heard a click sound.

Y/N turned around.

"Jimmy?" Y/N asked.

"Okay, Y/N. Drop the act."

"What are you talking about Jimmy?" Y/N sweats.

"I know you're an ad," Jimmy gets to the point.

"An ad?" Y/N bluffed. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me Y/N. You and I both know who you truly a-are."

Jimmy continues.

"Y/N...you're an advertiseme me-me-me...

An advertismeeeeeeee

Meeeeee

Mememe

You're an advertiseme-e-e-e-e-e---

Mee mee meeeee meeeee

.....

.....

.....

....

You're an advertisemeeee-meeeee

An advertisemeeeeee

An advertiseme me me me...

Meeeeee!

You're an advertisemee-eeeeee

Eeeeeeeeee

An advertiseme-me-me-me....

Meeeeeeeee

You're an advertiseme....

....

You're an ad-ad-dvertiseme-ment!"

"Jimmy please! I love you!" Y/N pleaded.

"That's what exactly what an Ad would say."

"So you were talking with your dick..."

"You'll re-regret that," Jimmy came closer as Y/N kept stepping back.

"Well...what are you going to do? Kill me!?"

"No actually...I'll get PC Principal to do so," Jimmy threatens.

"Does he know now?"

"No. But I'm certain that once I'm through with you, I'll spread the news out."

"Please Jimmy. Don't do this," Y/N started crying.

"Those aren't real tears," Jimmy disgustingly looks at Y/N.

Y/N looked at her stained shirt and saw drops of a glowing blue.

"You're an older model huh? It's pretty easy to find out. It's get-getting harder for me to find out where the ads are," Jimmy thumps his canes in intimidation.

"Please Jimmy! You have to believe me! I've changed! Ever since Leslie's death, I've gain control over myself!" Y/N falls to her knees.

"Not going to work, Y/N. Now I got some questions for you. Then our work here is done."

"How long have you've known?"

"Ever since Leslie actually. I've talked to everyone. Not too hard now I've gotten good at it.

Who made you?"

Y/N started to speak.

"The same ones who made Leslie. I was her sister."

Jimmy took notes on a sketchbook.

"Why aren't you trying to escape right now?"

"I love you Jimmy."

Jimmy looked down at the rug. He hesitated.

"What can I do to prove myself?" Y/N shouted.

"I'm not like those other ads. I know I can help. I've changed. My self-conscious has grown much stronger than that of my mental conditioning. Please! You have to believe in me!"

"Not...all ads are bad..." Jimmy whispered to himself.

He laughed.

"My dick is telling me to spare you."

Y/N laughed through the choking tears.

"Joking at a time like this, Jim-Jim?"

"But how can I trust you? I was heartbroken to realize you're an ad. It much easier to find out since gen 1 ads don't have blood, tears, or any bodily fluid. Yet you're still capable of eating."

"Jimmy," Y/N stood up.

"I hate my dick right now."

"Jimmy. I love you. Don't you forget it," Y/N walked towards Jimmy.

Jimmy didn't say anything. He was looking at his phone.

"Tell PC Principal, tell all the kids at school, tell everyone that I'm an ad."

Jimmy looked up.

"But I just request..."

Y/N stepped closer till they were inches apart.

"A kiss."

Jimmy growled and through his phone to the bed after turning it off.

"Jim?"

"We're done."