sobaniiruyo, twenty two.

❛  what are we ❜

[ 8:23 PM ]

Me:

Good evening.

Y/N:

when he texts you a lame ass 'good evening' after ignoring you for days 😍😍 #standards

Me:

Ah. You figured out it was me this time.

Y/N:

bitch i don't make the same mistake twice

why did you message me

Me:

You're still mad?

Y/N:

YES?????

DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO CONVINCE NILOU THAT YOU'RE NOT MY BOYFRIEND???

Me:

Oh. So that's what you're angry about.

Why did you try to convince her anyway?

Y/N:

why?

BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT MY BOYFRIEND ‼️‼️‼️

Me:

Hmm, who cares?

Y/N:

i care

Me:

You're quite repelled by a mere misunderstanding.

Y/N:

you'd probably print out flyers saying "I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RELATION WITH Y/N" in neon pink and throw them around if someone mistook me for your girlfriend

Me:

...

I won't waste my energy on something like this.

Y/N:

a murder is always planned in silence

Me:

You're not even smart enough to come up with an excuse on time, let alone murder me.

And tone down your rage. 🐹

Y/N:

oh????

i was there trying to comfort your colossal giant humongous ass because of a thunderstorm and when nilou barged in and asked if she was interrupting something because we were sitting next to each other holding hands your colossal giant humongous ass said YES

Me:

But she was interrupting.

Y/N:

WHAT WAS SJE INTERRIOPYMG

Me:

Isn't this the kind of thing romance authors write about?

Y/N:

you'd know

you write self insert fanfictions

Me:

... Please let that go.

Y/N:

i have one thing against you let me have this

oh sorry

i also have pictures of your abs 🙏🙏

Me:

Delete them.

The contract is over.

Y/N:

right... it's over....

what are we 🥺

Me:

Whatever you want us to be.

Y/N:

??????????

AL-HAITHAM

WHAT'S HAPPENING TO YOU

WHY DID YOU FLIRT BACK

Me:

Well. You said I wasn't expressive.

So now I'm being expressive, just like you wanted me to be.

Y/N:

bro stop i'll actually catch feelings 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Me:

Why are you so afraid of feelings?

Y/N:

mr. bigboobs when he doesn't have the testicles to spit out an apology but knows perfectly well how to criticise someone for being afraid of feelings

Me:

I have already apologised.

Y/N:

yeah but i haven't forgiven you losercose boytoy boyfailure 🫦

Me:

Then why are you talking to me?

Y/N:

... 😍

next question

Me:

Okay, next question.

How should I apologise?

Y/N:

didn't you gather all that when you were talking to me undercover 😐

Me:

Fifty-page long essay, serenading you by your dorm, squishmallows, and flowers. Am I missing something?

Y/N:

omg

will you really do all that for me 🥺

Me:

No.

Just wanted to show you that I remember.

Y/N:

kill yourself

Me:

🐹

Y/N:

and don't use this stupid emoji with me anymore

i thought it was an us thing

but you use it with your friends too

☹️☹️☹️

Me:

Does it really bother you so much?

Y/N:

yes

Me:

No wonder Nilou thought we were together.

Y/N:

EXCUSE ME

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN

Me:

You act like this and get surprised when people get the wrong idea.

Y/N:

bruh i was joking....

i've been bitchless for years 💔

the last time i went on a date with a man i watched the light in his eyes disappear when he realised i was funnier than him. he never contacted me again

Me:

How unfortunate.

Also, be careful while roaming around the campus.

One of the manhole covers has disappeared.

Someone as stupid as you might fall down.

Y/N:

"manhole cover" umm i think it's just called underwear lol

Me:

I'm calling the cops on you one day.

Y/N:

call the cops bitch i'll have sex with them

Me:

God help me.

Goodbye.

Y/N:

you are legally obligated to no longer seen zone me

Me:

Try me. I know the law.

Y/N:

i also know the law

and i'll win all the cases #bisexualcharm

Me:

How?

Y/N:

your honour, tbh, ngl, idgaf

Me:

How are you real.

Y/N:

baby are you complimenting me right now 🧌

Me:

It's no use.

Bye.

Y/N:

NO

I'LL SUE YOU

i swear to god if you leave me on seen...

You reacted with 🐹

seen (9:17 PM)

[ 11:32 PM ]

Dehya:

I should be a matchmaker

Cyno:

That's literally my job

Me:

All you guys have done is make me uncomfortable.

Cyno:

You get uncomfortable with everything

We don't care

Dehya:

tell me about everything that happened in the theatre club's room

like with raw details and shit

Me:

That's none of your business...?

Dehya:

HUH???

THE FUCK YOU MEAN NONE OF MY BUSINESS 🫥🫥🫥🫥 i planted you guys there

Cyno:

?

I did all the work

You were just there being an idiot

Me:

Ah.

I should have known.

Dehya:

did you guys make up

(and we're no longer having uno nights Cyno)

Me:

Yes.

Partially.

Cyno:

I'm sorry

☹️😭☹️😭

Uno nights are still on right?

@ Dehya

@ Dehya

@ Dehya

Uno?

Dehya:

omg???? partially?? why???

Cyno:

@ Dehya

Me:

...She wants me to apologise better.

Dehya:

then apologise better 🤨

Cyno:

@ Dehya

Sorry

If you ditch me I'll have to ask Y/N to play with me and she'll win 😭 Please

Me:

Don't cancel the Uno nights, Dehya.

Dehya:

so now you care....

one mention of Y/N and suddenly he's interested in the conversation

what kinda loser lmao.... 😹😹😹

Cyno:

He's always jealous of me

🤷🤷🤷

Anyway Dehya what about our Uno nights

Me:

Ugh.

I'm not.

Dehya:

enough of joking around

Cyno told me everything you did to that poor girl

a simple sorry isn't gonna cut it out dude 🫁 buy her a house or something idk

Me:

I don't need any advice, to be honest.

I know exactly what to do, but it's too much of a hassle.

Dehya:

keep up this attitude and no girl will ever like you...🫥🫥

Cyno:

Especially not Y/N

She likes her men pathetic

❤️

Me:

Umm...

Okay so...

Give me some help to write a fifty-page long essay.

2 people reacted with 🦶

seen by 2 people (12:35 AM)

hi mi amors... a quick update... kisses you all ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥