It has been two days and me and stokeley have had the best time together while Jah was away. Its the day he comes home from his trip. I couldn't wait to see him. Me and Stoke go pick him up from the nearest Walmart and Stoke drops me and Jah off at our house.

I was a little worried that Jah was still angry and depressed about Geneva. The car ride home was silent he didn't say a word. All he did was look out the window.

When we got home he just went straight upstairs. Closed his door and locked it. It was tuff seeing my brother like this. Whenever i felt sad, depressed, angry, or betrayed he helped me through it. It sucks that he wont let me help him.

A hour passes...

I was sitting on the couch watching the 3rd season of 'Riverdale' on netflix when Jah came downstairs and walked in the kitchen. He walked out with one of those vape things. he was about to walked upstairs when i stopped him.

"Jah," i said pausing the tv.

"What Jay?" he said slightly turning around.

"Jahseh, you havent talked to me since the whole Genev-

"DONT - SAY- THAT NAME IN THIS HOUSE!" Jahseh says dropping his phone running over to me and pointing in my face..

"Jahseh im just trying to help. I miss my brother. .. .

Where'd he go?" I say as a tear slowly comes down my face.

He notices my tears and relaxes a little. '*sighs' he sits down next to me.

"Im sorry Jay. Its just been alot Of shit going through my head" he says rubbing his dreads

"I-i know you trying to help and i love you for that.. but at this point i dont think i can be helped.. i cant be the person i was before." He pauses

"Im stuck in this sucken place and cant get out! Dont try to save me, because it will only cause you endless misery.. i cant be saved but you can.." he says getting up and looking for his phone

I couldnt face the fact that he was trying to get through this by himself. I noticed his phone under the table in the middle of our living room.

"If you talked about how you feel then you would feel a little better.." i say handing him his phone..
He jus stares at me, then runs upstairs.

"WHY THE FUXK ARE YOU SHUTTING ME OUT!? JAH I CAN HELP YOU!!" I scream angry at him for making his self miserable. He turns around and starts to turn red. As if he was holding his breath.

"JAYLA I CANT BE HELPED!" He screams back..

"CANT. OR DONT WANT TO BE?!" IM TIRED OF YOU NOT LETTING ME IN. I STILL NEED YOU AS A BROTHER IF YOU DIDNT NOTICE! JUST TELL ME WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH. YOU DONT HAVE TO BE ALONE!!" A storm of tears run down my face.

"WHAT IF IM MEANT TO BE ALONE JAYLA!? WHAT IF IM NOT MEANT TO BE CARED FOR OR LOVED?! I CANT TELL YOU WHAT I FEEL BECAUSE ITS A WHOLE FUCKING LOT!! I FEEL LIKE I DON'T WANT TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING. I FEEL UNLOVED, BETRAYED, SAD, ANGRY, HELPLESS, I- I- I- FEEK LIKE I WANT TO STAB MYSELF IN THE MIDDLE OF MY CHEST..
*sits on the steps.. crying his eyes out..
But at the crazy thing is that i still love her.." he says crying even harder..
I was so suprised he has never been this hurt. I go and sit next to him and hug him as he leans into my arms.

"She won't go away.. all i- thin- think about is... her" i could hear the pain in his voice.

"Jah, thats perfectly normal. It hurts but its normal. You cant un-do yall relationship. Its going to hurt, its going to burn, its going to probably be the worse feeling in the world! But you have to not punish yourself. "

"I Understand being Alone is the best thing or feels like the best thing you could do right now.. but your not supposed to be alone and hate yourself. You supposed to be alone and see things about yourself and change them." He looks up at me and laughs.

"Don't use my words against me" he says smirking..

"But there true.. and they helped me when i was going through the whole Mason situation.." we pull our hug apart.
We smile at each other. Just then his eyes starts to drift down from my face to my neck. He tilts his head in confusion.
All i could think was *UH SHIT🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️*
He slings by head to the side..
"Jayla."
"*clears throat* yes"
"Imma ask you one time and one time only.." he says looking at the ceiling..
"Were did you get these hickies from?"
I start to think about that night stokeley came over.. i knew i couldnt tell him stokeley did it.

"There not hickies" i said looking down.
I could tell he was getting angry.
He picks up his phone and turns on the flash. He points it to my neck moving my head roughly.
"So.. you telling me these not hickies?!" He says still holding my head to the side..
"There not.." i reassure him
"There big enough to be bruses though.. as if some one hitting on you" he says. Then looks up like a lightbulb just went off in his head. Then he starts to look madder then ever.

He runs upstairs and i try to grab his leg to stop what ever he was about to do. But i failed🤦‍♀️😐 he runs back downstairs with his car keys. I knew what ever he was about to do somebody was about to get the shit leaked🤦‍♀️🤢
He pulls me to car. I manage to get out his grip.

"Jah what the fuck are you about to do?" I say trying to grab the keys

"If those are bruses, then somebody had to hurt you. Stokeley was the only one with you all this time.. or was supposed to be.." he says trying to grab me again

"What you do mean supposed be" i said confused as hell😐

He sighs and leans on the side of his car. "i was worried about you being by yourself so i told stoke to stay with you.." he said with his hand over his face.

Just then stokeley pulls up out of no where?!😧 he gets out the car and Jah runs full speed to him and rams him into his car.. stokeley is too confused to fight back.
😐😥😧 stokeley stops jah from punching him. I go and break them up..

"WHAT THE FXCK?!" Stoke yells confused.

"What the fuck you mean 'WhAT ThE fUcK' nigga you abusing my sister. What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Jahseh screams

Stokeley looks at me confused "You told him that?!" He ask
I couldn't even say nothing.

"Nigga look at her neck.. she said these aint hickies.. so these got to be bruses." Jah explains

It was silent stoke was confused, jah was angry, i was scared and wishing that he didn't see what he saw..

Stokeley looked at me like 'are u gunna tell him' i couldnt.. he just rolls his eyes and gets in his car and drives off..
Later that day i tell my friend to pick me up to go see a movie or something.. i just needed to get out the house .. and think about what i was gunna do and how i was gunna fix this..

Later that night she drops me off at home. Jahs car wasn't there, i didnt think to much about it. I go in the house and just watched some netflix in the living room.
*2 or 3 hours pass by
The door knob start to shake i assume it was jah. He walks in but with stoke following behind him.

He walks over to me and grabs the remote to turn the tv off. He sits in the chair in front of me. Stokeley sits beside me.
I felt very attacked.. i dont know what the fuck came over me but i had to get the fuck outta there..
My dumbass got up and tried to run but stokeley ended up catching me. And throwing me back on the couch. 🤦‍♀️😧
*silence..

"Jayla imma ask you this one time and one time only.. and i swear ta god dont lie to me! Are those hickies on your neck" He says staring straight through my soul.

"Yes, the- they are.." i say scared of what was about to happen next.

"That's all you had to say" jahseh says turning on the tv, like it didn't bother him at all.
I look at Stokeley and he was just as confused as I was.

"Y- You not mad?" I ask in confusion.

"Nah" Jahseh says shrugging his shoulders.

"Me and your bestfriend?! Your bestfriend for as long as you can remember?! You see these all over my neck and chest yeah, he did that." I say trying to get a understanding of everything.

he starts laughing at my reaction.. " i already knew. I'm your bother. I know everything. You think all these years I didnt know my younger sister had a crush on my best friend. Im not gunna stop you from living your life.. ''YoU Do yOu BoO" he says in a girly voice..

"So why would make that whole scene earlier?"

"Cuz u didnt tell the truth.. thats all you had to do.." Jah  said taking a sip of his Hennessey

I was so stuck and suprised that i just bust out laughing and couldnt stop. They look at me like i was crazy then just ignored me..

We were just watching movies and eating snacks for the rest of the night..

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