Chapter 41

"How are you feeling?" Jason asked as he contemplated at Alison who was curled up on the couch with the tea cupped in her hands.

"Better. Thank you and... I'm sorry for... the whole scene back then." She said sheepishly.

"Don't be. Obviously, something happened. Want to talk about it?" He placed his hand on hers.

"I guess. I just miss my friend, you know. Sorry." She shook her head looking anywhere but him, she could not look him in the eyes and lied, the guilt was building from within. How could she hide the truth any longer when all he offers was comfort and compassion?

"I'll stay with you till your mom comes back. I won't be leaving you alone in the house." He asserted when she gave a questioning look. He grabbed the television remote control and sat back to the couch beside her. Wrapped his arms around her shoulder and she scooted to cuddle closer laying her head on the crook of his neck, taking his familiar scent and wrapped her arms around his chest. He made her feel safe, made her feel needed, made her feel that everything will be alright. Closing her eyes, her mind could not help but wonder at the terrible secret she kept from him. She felt selfish. But can I just be selfish and have this moment of peace?

Jason left as soon as he had dinner with the family after Mrs. Brooke's constant pestering asking him to stay for dinner. Later that night, Alison was turning the wheels in her mind trying to figure out who would place the sick letter in her locker. Worst, who and how did that person know about her secret past. The thought alone made her heart beat racing and was startled as her phone suddenly buzzed. She opened the message with cold hands.

Ally,

I'll be in town next week. Meet me?

-Liam-

Liam? He's here? When did he return? Why would he come here? She had not seen him since the funeral and was wondering how he knew where she had moved to and how she will face him again. She felt terrified and worried.

Okay.

-Ally-

She could not possibly decline but only hope that he might actually change his mind and decide not meet her. Hiding her face on her knees, she tried to catch her breath.

The next day, Alison was walking alone to the cafeteria with her eyes staring blankly in front of her while her thoughts were lost and scattered when she bumped into someone, dropping some of the books she was carrying. Tried to recollect herself, she shook her daze away and quickly bent down to collect her things on the floor.

"Sorry, I wasn't- Cole?" She finally lifted her head to see the person whom she bumped on accident or was it an accident?

"Daydreaming much, Red?" He teased helping her picked up some of the books which she snatched back and stood up at once.

"Jason told me everything and with that being said, I don't think we should be friends anymore. If you ever really were my friend in the first place." She said flatly, walking away from him before he caught her elbow turning her to face him.

"Did he really tell you... everything? Including how he humiliated her? How he basically made her leave town? Or the endless list of girls he screws just to get over her." He revolted letting go of her elbow as she paused.

"So, you really are using me to get back at him. Finally, you admit it. Now, stay away from me." She stated with disdain trying to pretend that what he said about Jason had not stirred anything.

"I wasn't... using you. I didn't even know you were with Jason, initially." He sounded guilty but it was difficult to believe any of his words now.

"Stay away." She seethed stomping away from him.

"I'm sorry!" She was already walking towards the cafeteria door when she heard him shouted but decided to ignore it. What did he do? He humiliated her? How? Why? She continued walking towards Layla and Zoe who was already sitting at the table.

"Hey what took you so long?" Zoe asked, pushing the food tray towards her.

"Thanks. Bumped and dropped my things by accident." She replied opening the wrapped egg sandwich, took a big bite of it.

"Are the boys still having practice? Don't they get lunch break or something. After those workouts and they don't get food? That's torture!" Zoe crunching on her carrot like a rabbit.

"Of course, they have lunch break, Zee. Just after practice. Anyway, how are you doing, Al? I feel so distant from you nowadays. Are you still working at the studio? What exactly do you do there?" Layla bombarded.

"We just went out together last weekend, Lay. And yeah, I still am working... as an assistant, or more like a helper, I guess." She replied hesitantly.

"Of what? Like administration stuff?"

"No. I help as an assistant teacher handling young kids." She said sheepishly.

"Wow. That's amazing, Al." "Ugh... the screaming, the whining, the yelling, the crying, the shouting. I can't imagine- But good for you, Al." Layla and Zoe said at the same time but after Layla gave her a sharp look, Zoe changed her comment from disgust to praises which made them all to laugh together.

The next few days, Alison was starting to become restless and apprehensive counting down the days she will be meeting Liam that afternoon. She already skipped school yesterday and this morning for being unable to calm her nerves and anxiety. She stared at herself in the mirror in her black skinny jeans and loose white t shirt, with her auburn hair pinned up. This was the first time she met someone from her past with this new look and it made her uneasy. Her phone buzzed and saw that Jason had called her, again.

"Hi... No, I'm fine, just need some rest I guess... No, it's fine, you don't have to come here. I just need more sleep and I'll be back on my feet by tomorrow... Thanks, I will. Alright, see you. Bye." She kept twisting the edge of her shirt, feeling terrible after she hung up the phone. Hiding things from him is one thing, lying to him is another thing, although it may all seemed the same nonetheless. She glanced one last look at herself in the mirror before walking out to face her past.

Deciding to clear any nervous nerves and mentally prepare herself, she chose to walk to where they would rendezvous. The walk took almost thirty minutes and she arrived at the cozy small café. Pushing the door open, scanned the room looking for the familiar tall blonde-haired guy but was nowhere to be seen. She ordered a hot chamomile tea hoping that it might help ease the agitation. The café was relatively quiet with very few customers, thus when the door opened, she snapped her head up quickly that might actually strained her neck. There stood the tall with high and tight haircut and familiar baby blue eyes looking straight back at her. He strode towards her as she slowly stood up, her heart pounding.

"Hey Ally." He said wrapping his arms around her, tears welled up in her eyes. She hugged him back, tears already streaming down her cheeks that she tried so hard to hold. They stood comfortably in each other's arms for a moment, seizing any consolation they could get and then finally letting go followed by studying each other's appearances.

"You look well. When did you get back?" She finally asked in a hoarse voice.

"Last week. I came back home to meet my parents and they told me that you moved here." He replied.

"Dad got a job offer here and he moved us all here. Said it might be good change." She shrugged.

"Is it... doing you any good?"

"I met a few friends. They're... nice. Of course, nobody could ever take her place, nobody is quite like her, you know. I miss her." Her eyes welled up again.

"Of course. I miss her too. But we have to move on, Ally. My sister would want you to move on and live your life." He added, wiping away the hot tear falling on her cheek.

"I miss her so much. And it's my..." She sighed.

"As much as I wanted to blame someone, it should be me. I should give much thought about her than just leave."

"You're defending the country, Liam. While I was there with her the whole time and yet..." She trailed unable to finish the sentence.

"That's enough. I'm not here to listen to your crap, blaming yourself. I came all the way wanting to know how you are doing." He managed to offer her a smile and they continued talking about her new life with her new friends and her relationship with Jason.

"I'm glad that you're moving on, Al. I know of all of us, you were closest to her. And I'm just glad to see you now. Do they know about what happened?"

"Of course not. It's difficult enough to move on. But having them knowing what I did... I can't..."

"Alison. I know it's hard... Trust me, there's not a day I didn't think of her." He insisted placing his hands on hers while giving it a little squeeze.

"Me too. I'm sorry for hiding my past but I just... am not ready. They can never know..." She said shakenly.

"I understand. When you're ready. I just hope that you'll learn to accept the truth, stop blaming yourself and it might help you deal with the PTSD. I'm sure your friends will understand. Especially listening to how Jason helped you calm your anxiety attack." He suggested. Liam had always been a brother to her like she was a sister to him.

"I know. I'll... try." She lied, knowing that she would rather keep it to herself about her past, knowing how he would judge her or worst, giving him another burden that might be too much for him to comprehend.

"And I noticed your new wardrobe, though it doesn't look that bad, it's something new." He teased.

"Yeah, something new, maybe new me."

"You'll always be Alison Brooke, with the wild auburn hair, the kind, caring, talented, beautiful and amazing girl that I always knew." He smiled.