Year 2008

In this story Jojo or Lina don't exist.

My boyfriend and I have been together for three years now he's just joined CFL and my engineering course is going as planned, life was good at least that's what I thought!!

Until one evening, he came home late looking defeated and all cried out.

"Joe are you ok??" I ran to him as he slid down on the door until he was fully sat down now full on crying.

"Babe are you OK??" He cried some more as I held onto him closely as he cried hurtfully.

"We are f*cked... We are f*cked Baby...." He said sobbing loudly a sound that broke my heart.

"What happened?"

"I have not been feeling well for some time now, I decided to go get checked up and I just found out that I have leukemia

That left me speechless, tears cascaded my face lowly as well.

"And....And as if that wasn't enough, the CFL have released me, I don't know what to do I have no job and I need money to treat this disease, I need money to pay for our bills here and for food!!! What am I gonna do??"

The world came crumbling down for us. Joe was a good guy, a kind one, an intelligent one and most especially a loving one, he didn't deserve this. Nobody did, he really worked hard to be where he was, this was unfair.

Year 2009

Everything has been hard for us since he lost his job, we were now relying on my part time job at one of our local cafés here at Tampa.

It's what put food on our table. The savings he had, all went to his medical bills and on the brighter side he was in remission so that wasn't too bad. My engineering course was still going on so I had to make time for both my studies and job and it was difficult. I was finding it difficult to support us and especially him.

One Saturday, my parents asked me to go see them according to them, they wanted to talk to me about something, it sounded serious and I was hoping they were OK.

I drove for three hours to Miami, that's where we resided at and parked at our parking lot as my mom came out and embraced me first followed by my dad who gave me a literal bearhug that I thought was gonna break my bones.

We got in the house and sat at the breakfast bar as mum served us coffee.

"Y/n how are you sweetheart, how have you been doing especially now that Joe lost his job."

"Everything has been difficult, Joe has gone into depression, he doesn't care about his health anymore, and I have a job that I have to juggle with my studies so that we don't go hungry" I said as I finally broke down Infront of my parents who were at both of my sides comforting me.

"That's exactly what we called you here about, we know you love him so much, but love isn't always enough, you've done so much for that boy, you've almost sacrificed your studies for him, you even feed him. I'm not saying that's bad but there's a limit to everything, your relationship is now becoming toxic and I feel like you should just call it off with him so that you can concentrate on your studies and upcoming final exams. We paid tonnes of money so that you could follow that field. The boys are a lot you can always get another one that doesn't have a baggage, no disrespect to Joe, you know I love that kid and I respect him for how he always treated you like a queen especially when he had money and a job but now it'll also be good for him to go and focus on his mental health and how to get back his life in order."

"No dad, noo... I can't end it with Joe, I love him he means the world to me, he helped me a lot, he helped pay for my studies, he gave me everything, I can't leave him now that he doesn't have anything that would be bad on my part. I'll break his heart and I don't want that."

"Y/n listen to your dad, he has a point you two need a break from each other so that you can put your lives in order in the future when y'all are stable, you can always rekindle that relationship nobody's gonna stop you but now y'all have to let each other go.

"I'm not leaving Joe and that's FINAL!!!" I took my handbag and drove away.

"How could they even suggest that are they crazy??"

I drove with force until I reached home where I found Joe with a huge grin.

"Hey princess, I've got good news" he kissed me softly

"Tell me." I got anxious to hear what he had to say.

"Having lost my chance with CFL and NFL, I decided to go into the footsteps of my father, WWE accepted me and now I'll report to their developmental wing FCW in Orlando on January next year to start training, I'm going to hold onto this one and I promise you I'm going to go back on my feet in no time who knows, I might be the next face that runs the place (no puns intended)"

I was not impressed by that news, he was going to start training in January?? We are in June that's far far along. He's gonna spend two years or so training before he gets to the mainshows. How long was I gonna take this, my parents words started to echo through my head, I had heard enough of this, I need to focus on my studies, my main exam was coming in November. My parents promised to cater for all my needs until I finished college late this year so I had nothing to worry about so all I had to do was call it off with Joe and I didn't know how. I loved him surebut love is not everything , I was drained and I had a whole lotta life ahead of me so I wasn't going to let my 3 year old relationship ruin it."

So on Friday afternoon that week after my classes, I found him sleeping on the couch and that bothered me a lot

"Joe WAKE UP!!!"

He jolted up quickly looking around in panic.

"Are you OK??" He came closer to me but I moved away.

"No I'm not OK and I can't hide this anymore so I'm gonna come straight with it, I think we need to break up."

"What... Why.. what did I do??" His voice broke.

"Nothing I'm just tired and completely drained by this relationship. I can't keep doing this, I'm straining to provide for us while schooling."

"Don't do this, I'm getting into WWE we will get out of these situation baby I promise. I'll treat you like the queen you are when I get money because I know I'm going to get good coins when I join the brand!!"

"And that will be like 2 years from now and I no longer have patience, please it's time for us to say goodbye it will be good for both of us so that we can now focus on our own paths."

"Is it because I'm no captain of my team and no longer make cash as I used to?? Is it because you got a hotter guy who has money and a great physique??"(Remember Joe was on the heavier side here)

He held me from behind

"Please don't do this y/n, I love you"

"Well love is not gonna feed us, I'm sorry but I have already made up my mind, Pack your bags and leave my apartment"

Tears flowed down his cheeks as he looked defeated as he left to go get his things I broke down.  "Did I make the right decision about this??" Was the question lingering in my mind as he took all his belongings and left. If only I knew I had made the worst decision in my life.

Present day:

I always reflect on that day. I let the love of my life go and my biggest regret ever.
He kept his word though, he really became the face of WWE, the main event and the hottest thing in his industry now and I let that go because of selfishness.

He's hotter now way hot than the men I've dated and the one I married.

And the worst part is he's moved on with a very hot woman and they even have three beautiful kids and he looks way happier now.

It hurts to know that woman could have been me, If I didn't let other people in on our relationship and selfishness take over my heart.

He proved everyone wrong, he really was a diamond in the mud and Instead of taking that diamond and polishing it, I just buried it even more in the mud and left it there but somebody picked it up, polished it and now gets to have it for good.

I'm now married to Derrick (made that up) who was Joe's friend and colleague from his cfl days, whom I regretfully used to have an affair with behind Joe's back when he went into depression, who now cheats on me every chance he gets. Crazy enough is I didn't even finish school, my engineering dream didn't push through because I got pregnant for him.

Everytime I just cry while looking at Joe and Is photos knowing things would have been different if I didn't do what I did.

I keep wishing that I stood by my word and stood by him through thick and thin and didn't sleep with his friend or listen to my parents because I still very much loved him but then the truth was that I was never gonna be with him.

My life has become difficult since I let Joe go.
But then there was nobody to blame but me and my wandering hands.