note: this is self-indulgent! updates may and will be slow, jokes are jokes, they are not serious and meant to offend others. if it does offend you, please send me a dm :) chapters may be short depending on the plotline (maximum will probably be around 1k), places will be fictional (i might not even base it off of a real place at all),  anddd! drop a follow 😎 /j

i haven't written fanfiction nor have i caught up with blue lock since june so if there's anything i don't know or if ever i make a mistake please tell me 😭

intro: this is probably just a bunch of chapters about most of the blue lock cast if they were all neighbors in the same subdivision. kind of inspired by reply 1988 except it's in modern day and there isn't much romance. just their everyday lives so the chapter length depends on the plot designated for the chapter. 

🎞️

there's a subdivision in the small city of utashinai, hokkaido, with a painstakingly blue ass wall that surrounds it.  

it also has a tricky ass lock. 

and it also has the most problematic ass kids. 

let me walk you through the neighborhood. 

"ISAGI FUCKING YOICHI GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE YOU PLUMHEADED SHIT!" 

world pause! that's rin itoshi. he's a dog. not just any dog, he's a dog that's gone wild after you let go of it's leash. and man, does he have a temper. 

"OH MY GOD I'M ON IT!" 

that's isagi yoichi. he must have woken up late today. well, he wakes up late on all days. he's your average background character except he has a bad case of overthinking and it's the intellectual overthinking, not the anxious type. 

"i believe that it doesn't serve much justice to the other people living in this subdivision for all of you to be making that much noise at 8AM in the morning." 

"you're too ginger to be acting like superman. at least have your underwear out!" 

your friendly neighborhood, kunigami rensuke, the type of boy you'd want your daughter to marry. even if he's the green flag justice seeking dude, justice never seems to serve him right. 

and there's bachira, don't even try to get on his bad side. despite him lacking in physical attributes (such as his weight and height), you'd know better than to start a fight with him. 

"you losers it's only 6AM! don't tell me you all messed with each other's alarm clocks again.." 

and that's probably the most normal out of all of them, chigiri hyoma. oh, did i tell you he could totally pass off as a girl? 

rin's face only evolves into a more angrier look once hearing chigiri. kunigami immediately looks at bachira, who is smirking, and isagi's too busy trying to find where he put his trousers to even notice the sudden silence. 

"ISAGI FUCKING YOICHI I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!" 

"bachira you made me wake up at 6 in the morning for what? for your own pleasure?" 

"yes, it's my pleasure indeed." 

A pink haired boy who's hair seems like it's been cut by cavemen who used whatever devices they used to cut enters the view, he's a few feet away from the four arguing men and he looks like he's absolutely tired of their shit. 

"i'm sae itoshi and this is blue lock. this morning isn't actually a special morning. it's a saturday morning- so the boys find it funny to prank each other by messing up each other's alarm clocks, not knowing that they all messed up each other's alarm clocks. thus, all of them waking up three to four hours before their supposed 'time'." 

once again, zoom into the boys, who are now joined by chigiri hyoma, who has the most haggard expression, in his dinosaur pajamas, and his hair seems like it can slay mother gothel. 

"YOU ARE ALL FU-" 

"chigiri was not affected by the alarm prank, however, his residence is situated in the very middle of all four arguing boys' houses. also, we don't censor swear words here, i just wanted it to seem like we do for the tv show effect." sae spoke. 

"ah, and bachira really isn't affected at all, despite setting kunigami's alarm two hours earlier. he just wants to see everything unfold. and, kunigami really wouldn't have the balls to do it. let's continue." 

"-CKING BASTARDS ASSHOLE SONS OF THE UGLIEST MEN ON EARTH." 

"RIN YOU'RE TOO EMO THAT WE AREN'T EVEN LAUGHING AND WE'RE MORE CONCERNED." 

"what?" 

" ISAGI, IF YOU WANT TO BE THE MAIN CHARACTER, FEEL FREE TO WALK OUT BECAUSE EVERYONE HERE THINKS THEY'RE Y/N POTENTIAL AND YOU'RE TOO BORING." 

"what?! no! guys, he's lying!"

"BACHIRA, I CAN HEAR YOU QUOTING HARRY STYLES FANFICTION. YOUR EYES ONLY HOLD MONSTERS, NOT THE GODDAMN UNIVERSE."

"shut up i'm short!" 

" AND FINALLY, KUNIGAMI. YOU COLLECT MORE MY LITTLE PONY DOLLS THAN DC ACTION FIGURES THAT SOMETIMES I WONDER IF YOU WANT TO SHOOT RAINBOWS FROM YOUR EYES AND HANDS RATHER THAN BE THE  MAN OF STEEL."

"how did you- i mean, no!" 

sae, again appears while applauding, causing all the boys to look at him. "i must applause chigiri for bottling all that up all these years and suddenly just twisting the cap to the bottle and spilling it all. all four men seem to be too awestruck-" 

"brother you're so lukewarm stop it!" 

"sae who the hell are you talking to?" 

"don't worry, my brother's going through things." 

"how does that help?" 

sae coughs, making the boys stop arguing and deadpan at him. he ignores their pierc "all four men seem to be too awestruck by how much time chigiri has kept these thoughts, and of the intensity of the insults- or facts, may i say. now, i myself have not fallen victim to this 'alarm clock' dilemma, but i can tell, by their haggard expressions every weekend, that this is not just a simple prank. much more ironic since they themselves cause this havoc." 

"thanks so much for informing us, sae. now let's settle this the blue balls way." isagi thanked sae while pushing the aloof boy away. 

"have we really decided on blue balls as our name?" chigiri cringed, while bachira was on the floor laughing. "i suggested it as a joke but it seems isagi took it seriously! HAHAHAHA"  

rin sighed and face palmed. 

"guys! if we want to stop waking up at 3, 4, 5, or 6AM in the morning, we have to stop doing it. please, i keep falling asleep while rin tutors me!" isagi whined a bit too loudly. 

"i fall asleep while tutoring isagi." 

isagi deadpanned. "see? this is why i still don't know how to work with radical expressions." 

"don't bring math into this. you all know how shit we all are." chigiri bickered. 

"yeah, at this point it's natural for all of us to attempt to study math together to no avail." kunigami agreed. 

"i really don't see where this is going." rin commented. causing everyone to look at him. "of course you don't. you're the only one here who's actually good at math!" isagi complained. 

kunigami sighed dejectedly. "you know what, i'm going back to bed. i have to meet up with my groupmates for a video project later." then, looking around, he realized there was someone missing. "hey where's bachira." 

chigiri looked around as well, "he probably went home while we were arguing." this statement caused isagi to chuckle.

"he's sleeping on the floor." 

"wait. he's sleeping on the floor!" 

the four awake boys panicked and carried bachira from all four limbs and rushed him to his house. sae once again came into view with the boys in the background. "for a little bit of context, bachira's mom absolutely hates when bachira comes home dirty for no valid reason at all. the last time the boys let bachira sleep on the hard, rough, cement. they- and bachira, had faced quite a scolding from her. i'm too sure that they had been traumatized because they all put in the effort to keep the boy clean." 

"RIN OPEN THE DOOR!" 

"i'm literally holding bachira's back and hand, you do it, plumhead." 

sae glanced at the boys, "well, since after this, they'll probably just sleep, i have no reason to stay here. trauma won't be knocking on their door today, but i pray for the day that it does." 

-