I don't go inside. I pull up to her place and sit, staring at my hands gripping the wheel. All rational thought escapes me as scenarios fly through my head. Elle leaving, Elle telling me she hates me, Elle breaking up with me. I shudder at the thought of her and Spencer together, though the voice of reason in the back of my head tells me that wouldn't happen. Still, I can't bear that thought.

I startle as a knock sounds on my window. Elle peers in, looking confused as my heart races. I take a deep breath and pop my door open, Elle moving out of the way as I step out of my car.

"Hi." I say and she stares at me for a second before wrapping her arms around my waist, completely taking me by surprise. Her shoulders shake as I hug her, breathing in the scent of her perfume.

"Elle." I whisper after a minute. "Let's go inside. It's cold." I'm in my shorts and a tanktop, not exactly ideal for the chilly night. Elle pulls back and I follow her inside.

"I have a lot to say." I say as I shut the door.

"I know. I know." She says, sitting on the couch. "But before you do, I have to say some things."

"Okay." My mouth goes dry as I sit beside her, praying that she doesn't tell me she can't do it anymore.

"I know it wasn't your fault. I know you think it's your fault, but it's not, and you can't blame yourself." I stare at her and she laces her fingers through mine. "You were trying to protect us, not hurt Spencer."

"And yet, I still did."

"Not as much as I think you think you did."

"I didn't want any of this to happen."

"I know." She says and I groan.

"We're never doing this again."

"What?"

"Ignoring each other." I say and her lips quirk up into a smile.

"Absolutely not." She wraps her arms around me and I press my face into her shoulder. "I missed you, Soy."

"I love you." I say and she hums.

"I love you too." We pull away and discuss what we're going to do. At least the tension is gone, even though there's so much uncertainty in the situation. We decide to try and speak to Spencer, and get him to understand that we couldn't say anything. Then we set a day to tell Strauss. It's inevitable, her finding out, and we'd rather it come from us.

We give ourselves a week. A week to fix things with Spencer and tell Strauss. Once our discussion is done, we head back to my apartment. A good part of Elle's stuff is there, and we're used to being there anyway.

"I haven't been sleeping well." Elle admits as I unlock my door.

"Me either." I say and she smiles softly. I send a text to Morgan as we start making dinner, thanking him for forcing me to stop moping around.

Elle is recounting the argument with Spencer when someone knocks on my door.

"Oh, what now?" I mutter, standing up to answer. I freeze when my eyes meet Hotch's.

"Hotch?" What is it with my coworkers showing up at my apartment?

"Hello, Sawyer." He says, his eyes moving past me, clearly falling on Elle. "Elle."

"Hi." I hear her say slowly, getting up from the table. Oh god, he has to know. There's no way he doesn't know.

"May I come in?" He asks.

"Uh, sure." I let him in and trade confused looks with Elle as I shut the door.

"Is everything okay, sir?" I ask and he turns to face me, sighing.

"You're being reassigned." He says and I stare at him.

"Excuse me?" This feels eerily similar to the conversation I'd had with Morris, the one that had upended my entire life.

"White Collar would like you back."

"What the hell, Hotch?"

"I did not choose this."

"You cannot just fuck with my career like this!" I say. "Are you even going to bother telling me why?"

"Strauss received a report of a relationship." He says, glancing pointedly at Elle. "Relationships, as you know, are prohibited, unless properly disclosed."

"We're going to disclose it."

"It's already become a problem." He says. "You have the option to return to your old position at the New York office or take a new position at Quantico."

"Hotch, you cannot be serious!" Elle interjects.

"This is above my head." I seriously hate that phrase.

"Did you even try to stop it? All that bullshit you said about me being a valuable part of the team?"

"Agent Vanderbilt,-"

"Look me in the eye and tell me that you made an effort to stop this." He looks at me, hesitating. "Thought so. Get out of my apartment, please."

"Sawyer-" He looks almost apologetic, but anger clouds my mind.

"I said get out." He pauses but complies, the door shutting and leaving us in silence.

"We can fight this." Elle breaks the silence.

"I don't care. I don't even care. I'm not staying on a team that doesn't want me there." I clench my hands, shaking. "This is fucked."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"This absolutely wasn't your fault." I say. "Don't ever think that." I pause and get even angrier as I think of Hotch's words.

"He said someone filed a report." I say slowly. "Spencer."

"Oh my god." Elle says. "He wouldn't. He said he wouldn't."

"Who else would have done it?" I feel tears come to my eyes.

"I'm sure he-"

"I don't even care. I really can't. I-He can have it his way. I'm off the team, he's got his wish." Elle has tears swimming in her eyes and I feel bad about how angry I am. But Spencer screwing with my career because he can't get what he wants? Of all the childish and immature things he could have done, this is the worst.

"Sawyer?" Elle asks after a minute.

"Yeah?"

"Are you...are you going to go back to New York." My eyes snap to hers.

"No. No." I say. "I-I'm not leaving you."

"I mean, I understand if you do, you loved that job, and your family is there."

"Elle, listen." I grab her hand. "I'm not going anywhere. You're pretty stuck with me."

"But what about your job?"

"DC White Collar is the second best. I loved New York, but I love you more. And it's a good division."

"I don't want you to lose your career for me." She sounds distraught, her voice breaking my heart. Maybe I was right, I'm destined to be unhappy. And to make everyone around me unhappy.

"I'm not. I'll have a new job, I'll have you. Best of both worlds." She sighs and I reach up, brushing a tear off her cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Elle." I say and she frowns.

"Why?"

"This is a mess for you too. And I'm screwing with the team."

"You are part of the team. You aren't screwing us up, you are part of the team."

"Not anymore." I huff out a bitter laugh. "Not after this."

laugh out loud- sasha<3