CHAPTER 13: FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS

Whitmore College

Unlike Elena, Natalie had decided to trust Stefan in the hands of Damon (even if she was worrying so much she just couldn't think about anything else) so she went back to college, used so much of her freetime studying with Caroline that she had read a most of her school books at least twice. Yeah, she was proud. But when she chose to study with someone who actually was in the Applied Microbiology class, she knew just the guy.

But when she was talking with Elena, she was expressing the same worry that had taken over her and caused her to mostly bury herself in studies. "But you never know what they might be doing. I mean, it's not uncommon for patients with retrograde amnesia or other traumatic brain injuries to turn volatile."

She could basically feel Elena's disbelief at her expressing her knowledge on the subject. "Okay, Dr. Saltzman. Since when do you know so much about amnesia?"

Natalie shook her head and sighed with a small smile as she walked closer to where she had intended to go. "After I studied up on my chem, biochem, applied microbio, molecular bio, and I had a Grey's Anatomy marathon with Caroline."

"You did all that for Stefan?" Elena asked in complete shock from the other line.

"No, I did all that to impress Dr. Maxfield. That it can help with Stefan is only a happy accident that I'm glad happened. If I'd known what was going to happen to Stefan, I'd have looked at a long time ago. But I'm mostly trying to get into Dr. Maxfield's class so I can find out why he covered up the death of our roommate. And after Caroline got sick of me, I got a study buddy," Natalie entered Maxfield's lab, where Jesse was standing with the blonde professor. "Hi, Dr. Maxfield. Jesse, you ready to go?"

Elena let out a sharp breath in surprise, having only noticed Natalie rejecting him, but was pleasantly surprised. "Jesse? Dr. Maxfield's incredibly hot, funny, and miraculously single lab assistant?"

Natalie sighed at how happy Elena sounded with the two hanging out together even if it wasn't that big of a deal. "That's the one. I'm taking him to the weirdest Mystic Falls event yet. The graveyard bell-ringing thingy."

"As in creepy first date?" the older twin asked suggestively.

The reincarnated brunette rolled her eyes as she watched Jesse say goodbye to Dr. Maxfield. "As in creepy study date. You could come, and bring Stefan maybe. Since it happens to be called Remembrance Day and he could use some of that."

Elena didn't even bother on commenting on Natalie changing the subject because she was getting tired of Elena constantly trying to tell her to be with Jesse or whatever. "I hope so, I really do. It just depends on how Stefan's handling the whole download of his dark and stormy past."

Jesse then walked over to Natalie with a smile in greeting and she sent him a small smile back. "Hi," she whispered to him before talking to Elena once again. "Gotta go. Love you."

"Love you too."

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Mystic Falls Cemetery

Natalie and Jesse tried to ignore everyone around them as Natalie sat on a picnic blanket, facing Jesse who was sitting on a chair with a textbook on his lap as he kept asking her questions, waiting for her to answer so he could see if she had actually studied as much as she said she did.

"Togavirus. Go." he gave her the first term he was waiting for her to explain the best she could, because that was so much harder than simple questions that could be answered.

"Togavirus causes congenital rubella." the brunette vampire answered with a small smirk, raising her eyebrows as if she was asking him to do worse, like it was too easy with that simple thing.

He chuckled at what seemed like competitive spirit in the pretty girl who he had been interested in for a while, and always just seemed to get better and better in his eyes with everything she did or said. "Okay, hot shot. Red Queen Theory."

She simply tilted her head as if she was disappointed of the lack of hard questions he was asking as she threw out her answer casually. "A theory often used to explain the contradictory relationship between predator and prey."

He took what seemed like another challenge to challenge her more and continued the question in search for one thing she actually had to think about. "And why does the supposedly weaker species always stay one step ahead?"

"Fear of extinction," she answered with a shrug before elaborating. "Like, a rabbit is able to outrun a fox because of fear of extinction, because if they get caught, they know they'll die. But a  fox is simply chasing its next meal."

"Damn. If Maxfield doesn't let you in, you can have my spot," he said, seeming almost in awe at how good she had become in such a short notice, remembering her not knowing a thing when they were in class, causing her to chuckle. "How did you learn all that so quickly?"

Natalie shrugged, knowing that if she had tried finding out about all of this before the summer, she'd probably fail, as she'd be too caught up with her inital failure before learning it completely, but she had tried her best to grow. "If people have low opinions of me, I like proving them wrong."

Jesse hummed, finding it to be a good philosophy, but had another question for her, wanting to know more about what she thought when it came to other people's thoughts"What about people with high opinions of you?"

She smiled and straightened up, seeming even smugger than before as she spoke. "I like proving them right."

And as the sound of another bell rang through the air, and Jesse spoke up once again. "I think that guy is doing a keg-stand on his grandad's grave," Natalie raised her eyebrows at him as if she had to be sure and he nodded, and she turned to look at the guy who was actually doing a keg-stand on a grave. 

She was about to turn back to face Jesse, only to find him closer than before. Close enough to make their lips touch. Natalie was frozen in place for a moment as he kissed her. But then she finally pulled away and he looked at her apologetically. "Uh, sorry. I've just kind of wanted to do that since move-in day."

"Ehm... it's okay. But you can probably study with Caroline, she's around here somewhere. She's been watching a lot of Grey's Anatomy. As for me, I'm just..." she trailed off awkwardly, meeting his disappointed eyes. "Gonna go."

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Elena had sent Natalie a text telling her where her, Damon and Stefan were in case she wanted to find them when she was done studying with Jesse, and she was so happy that her sister did that so she could find somebody who she knew that wasn't perhaps studying with the guy she was trying to avoid.

She had nodded at Damon as he walked out of the Salvatore tomb, and saw Elena and Stefan staring at her with questioning eyes, wondering why she was here. She smiled at them awkwardly. "I need sanctuary. I'm hiding."

"Well, you've come to the right place," Elena smiled at her sweetly, before glancing between her and Stefan. "But I've gotta go so you guys have fun. But not too much."

She walked away from Stefan, and as she passed Natalie, she sent her a wink, making Natalie tilt her head in confusion about who her sister actually wanted her to date. She kept saying that she should go out with Jesse but then she did the wink and leave alone thing with Stefan. Natalie narrowed her eyes at her. "You're giving me mixed signals."

Elena chuckled as she left the two alone, leaving Natalie to give Stefan this wide-eyed stare as he smiled at her in amusement because of the way she acted. "Natalie Saltzman. The love of my life."

If Natalie's eyes weren't widened already, they were definitely widened after he said that. "The what of the what now? The love- life- life- love of life? What?"

He chuckled at her obvious surprise at being surprised at the way he described her and how awkward of a person she seemed when she was surprised in that way. He thought it was cute. "I kept asking Damon about you and that's all he'd tell me."

"Damon, of course," she sighed in embarrassment as she pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to avoid meeting Stefan's eyes. "I really want to punch him. But, I'll try to punch his face but I always miss by, like, punching him in throat and I'll have to keep punching him until I reach the face," she muttered, and his eyes widened in surprise. She suddenly smiled sweetly at him. "So... what were you guys talking about?"

"Oh, eh... The unfortunate history of my loss of family members," he smiled suddenly, just rolling with her sudden change of mood. "I certainly hope your family history was happier than mine."

Natalie hummed, pursing her lips together before answering. "Well, let's see... First my mom died, but then it turned out that she had only been turned into a vampire and she came back, but then she died again. Then my kinda-aunt, Jenna, died. My biological father died at the same time as her. Uh, then my adoptive dad died but then it turned out that he turned into a vampire before dying again. Then my brother, but actually biological cousin, Jeremy, died but he was brought back to life so it's cool."

Stefan had been standing and looking shocked before hearing about her brother but actually biological cousin and remembering meeting someone of the same name. "Wait, Jeremy that lives in our house?"

Natalie smiled at how that was the only thing he questioned and nodded. "The one and only. But he only lives there because Elena and I both had a breakdown where I stopped her from burning our house down before I burned our house down," she explained, and then she saw him smiling at her weirdly. "What?"

He shrugged as he looked at her in wonder. "How do I not remember you? I mean, you're smart, you're pretty, you're funny. Obviously, you're the strongest woman in the world if you managed to figure out a way to get through all that."

She pursed her lips together as she did her best to not smile at his words, holding in a dreamy sigh. "Well... When you have people you love and they love you so much that they want to help you and stand by you, it always helps. You were definitely one of those people."

He chuckled, thinking about all he really knew about their relationship is they were very in love at one point and he had helped her through a whole lot of death in her life. "So, bonded by death? Please don't tell me that we met in a cemetery."

Natalie sighed awkwardly, knowing that she was not the one who met him in a cemetery. "No... I think that you and Elena did, though. We met someplace entirely different. You wanna see?"

"Yeah, sure."

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Mystic Falls High School

Natalie walked through the hall, all by herself as she glanced at the abandoned rooms to make sure they were still abandoned because she had no idea how Stefan might act if he actually were to talk to any humans or bump into them when he didn't remember how he was supposed to keep himself in control.

She kept walking, until she purposefully bumped into his chest, pushing herself away with a small smile, raising her eyebrows at him. "Anything?"

He sent her an apologetic look as he shrugged sadly. "No. Sorry."

She sighed, glancing at the way she looked, trying to recall the moment she first interacted with Stefan Salvatore himself, when she had no idea he was a vampire and frowned, before turning her head and looking behind her. "I think we're both going the wrong way, because I remember there was a weird poster about being generous on that board at the same time as I was talking about how I wasn't rich or giving. So if we switch..." he nodded and she grabbed his shoulders and turned them around. She quickly let go as she remembered when they would touch before. "So, this is where it happened. I'll just go and try again."

She started walking, but felt someone grab her wrist and turned around to meet his eyes, who were once again apologetic. "Hey, Natalie. As frustrating as it is for me not to have any memories, I really don't think that re-creating the time we met is magically gonna bring it all back."

Natalie sighed and shrugged, knowing that he was actually right but she wasn't just doing it for the hell of it. She wanted him to feel something other than blood lust, because she knew that it was probably the only thing that he had been able to focus on. "Yeah, I guess you're right. It's just... so weird to see you not know me."

He raised his eyebrows at her as if he was challenging her to a contest where they'd try to prove that the other one was weirder. "I'm weird? You're the one randomly running into people and talking about how you're not rich or giving!"

Natalie's mouth opened in surprise and mock offense, but the corners of her lips tugged up so it was obvious that she wasn't really offended. "It's not like I just run into people and yell I'm not rich or giving! I was worried that you had anything smash-able and that I might have smashed it because I wasn't rich or giving."

He chuckled, and Natalie quickly noticed how some football players were approaching a door to enter their corridor, and she also noticed how one of them had a not serious headwound but was still bleeding and she knew that she had to get Stefan out of there. "How about I show you the Falls? It's the most beautiful place in town and you can't really remember it... so? What you think?"

"Sure." he shrugged, and watched her smile and smiled just at seeing her dimples and her eyes brighten up as she started turning around and walking. He didn't even notice that he was standing still and staring after her for a while until she had almost reached the door. And then he hurried.

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The Quarry

Natalie smiled as the two had finally reached the Falls that ran into Steven's Quarry, even though nobody ever said that it was Steven's. She knew that if Stefan had his memories, he'd probably freak out a bit about living under there the whole summer, but she knew that without his memories, he just saw a beautiful place.

"How'd you become a vampire?" he then asked, frowning as he genuinely wanted to hear the story, knowing that a girl with such interesting history had to have a pretty interesting turning story.

Natalie shrugged as if her story was just her getting her neck snapped in a dark alley. "Your ex killed me, which doesn't say a lot because you've had a few of those... but still... I turned on an island as we were looking for the cure for vampirirsm. Ironic, I know. And your ex stabbed me with a branch and I died in your arms. But then I came back and I didn't want to turn. But Elena hid blood in my hot chocolate. You, on the other hand, was letting me make my own choice and letting me die as I pleased."

Stefan nodded as if he finally understood the meaning of life. "Ah. Got it. So, I'm an idiot."

Natalie snorted at how he was so quick to call himself an idiot and she smiled as she explained why he wasn't. "You're not an idiot. You have always been one of the most perfect people I have ever known. Except for when you were ripping people's heads' off. Then you were kind of a dick."

He nodded at the reminder that he was a ripper who enjoyed ripping because that's what rippers do. "Whatever monster I was capable of being, I could see why I was different around you."

"Being a monster has more to do with what you are rather than who you are. I once talked to you about how there's always a right path if you're willing to take it. I believe that we did, even after a few tries where we failed. The two of us chose to take the path where we believe that not all monsters do monstrous things." she said, using her most philosophical voice that was always saved away from when she'd stop being awkward for five seconds.

He smiled at how she was just rambling deep things and he chuckled. "I'm guessing you're one of those people who spout out deep pieces of advice every few seconds because you're so wise and experienced?"

Natalie laughed for a moment at how she could be one of those people who just walked around and were deep no matter what they did. "Depends on my mood. It can vary from what you just saw to me ranting about how America just couldn't accept that there was already a sport called football."

"It's working, you know?" he suddenly said, and Natalie's eyes widened as hope ran through her so quickly at the thought of something she was doing was working. Like, her reminding him how weird she was would help.

She allowed herself to smile widely, even if she was hoping a little too soon. "You're remembering?"

He hated the fact that the glow in her eyes that had started to come out had to be put out by him. "No. I mean, this, whatever we're doing, the distracting, the sublimating, whatever you wanna call it. The urge to feed has settled. I'm not, uh, hungry anymore."

Natalie tried to keep her smile up, but it was easy to see that it was fading and wasn't as genuine as when she thought he was actually remembering. "I was just trying to help you feed something but blood lust."

"I definitely did." he smiled at her, and she let out an awkward smile, knowing that just by that sentence she'd probably lose all her progress on moving on from him that she had worked so hard on the whole summer.

She noticed how his gaze quickly went to her lips, and she quickly remembered the last person to kiss her. And how she left him all alone afterwards and then totally forgot him. "Jesse," she whispered, and Stefan pulled away from where he had started leaning and frowned in confusion. "I'm sorry. But I came here with someone and I left him all alone because I left with you. I just have to find him. I'm really sorry."

Stefan clearly looked disappointed as he pursed his lips and hung his head and she bit her lip as she felt guilty for the way she was acting with those two guys. He finally looked up at her and nodded, as if he wasn't sad about it at all. Especially coming from the woman who's only description had been given was the love of his life. "Yeah, that's okay."

She nodded and sent him another apologetic look before walking off.

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Mystic Falls Cemetery

Natalie and Jesse had quickly regained touch and started talking again, trying to act as if the kiss never happened. And by night time, they were all good and had gotten some more studying done and the reincarnated brunette tried to shake this feeling of worry about Stefan away.

But when Natalie noticed Stefan standing in the cemetery full of people, and looking weirdly hungry for being Stefan. She excused herself to Jesse and asked him to meet her soon but she just needed to check in on him. "Hey, are you okay?"

Stefan nodded sarcastically and Natalie could easily tell that he had been drinking a lot, at least. He could've been drinking six kegs dry or something. "Well, if by okay you mean heavily spiraling into Ripper oblivion, then yes, I'm dandy."

Natalie tilted her head and looked at him worriedly, but then Jesse quickly ran up to them again, sensing the tension and walked up with two beers in hand. One for himself and one for Natalie. "Keg-stand guy passed out, so I stole these."

Natalie sighed, because she knew that it was bad timing with Stefan seeming a little unstable. "Jesse, would you mind giving us a moment or two?"

Stefan quickly recognized the name of the guy the supposed love of his life had gone there with and he suddenly felt his blood lust increase. "Yeah. It's probably a good idea because I can sense from here that you have a paper cut on the palm of your left hand, and I want to rip your entire arm off."

Natalie's eyes widened as she looked at Jesse looking really weirded out at Natalie's ex-boyfriend sensing a paper cut and wanting to rip his arm off. He had seen jealous exes but that was a whole new level. Natalie turned to her study date and allowed her pupils to dilate as she looked in his eyes, compelling him. "Leave, hide, I'll find you."

Jesse suddenly turned and walked away, not even being able to control his own actions for a moment as Natalie sighed and looked at the obviously hungry vampire in front of her. "What happened? You said that you didn't feel hungry anymore! And now you want to rip Jesse's arm off?"

He let out a shaky breath, as if he was almost angry at the mention of Jesse's name, even without remembering Natalie and the reason they broke up. He just felt like there was this natural instinct to be jealous of the love of his life going out with someone else. "Yeah, well, something changed. But do you have blood bags, at least?"

"Yeah, in the car. Follow me." Natalie nodded and turned to walk past him towards her car, only to hear the familiar woosh sound of a vampire speeding away. She turned back to look for him, but she didn't see anyone there.

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Natalie had spent a few minutes searching for sounds that could sound like Stefan, Jesse or a vampire feeding, because if it got out of hand, there could be some disgusting sounds. But when Natalie finally heard Stefan speaking, she knew it couldn't be good. Especially as she heard what he said.

"I have no memories because my brain was fried. The supposed love of my life is going out with you! So you tell me... what's the point of being good." Natalie heard him say, before making a hissing sound that she knew he was making right before he sunk his fangs into Jesse's neck.

Natalie used her vampire speed to end up right in front of the Salvatore crypt before rushing inside and seeing Stefan with his fangs deep in Jesse's neck. "Stefan!" she quickly grabbed him and pushed him off of Jesse, barely noticing how he was falling to the ground because she was too busy with Stefan. "What are you doing? You can't... you're not this person, not anymore. Not when you chose differently."

Stefan simply sighed and shook his head, although seeming apologetic about the whole thing as he looked at Natalie, and he was so sorry for how he seemed to get out of control when she just told him that she was there with someone else and he didn't even remember her. "I have to go."

"What?" Natalie asked, not expecting him to just leave like that.

He quickly sent her another apologetic look and shook his head in shame as he glanced towards where Jesse was lying on the ground with blood seeping out of his neck. "I have to leave."

"Stefan..." Natalie trailed off, seeming apologetic about everything, having heard what he said before she came, but he still walked out and Natalie glanced behind her and seemed to just remember Jesse. "Oh my god, Jesse! I blanked!" she ran towards him and allowed veins to grow under her eyes as her two of her teeth became fangs and she lifted her wrist and bit it before shoving it in Jesse's mouth. "I'm so sorry. I'm just so sorry."

▹▹▹

The next day, Natalie had gotten to hear some pretty awful news. She had cried and fallen apart and just felt all that she had worked on when it came to herself crumble at these simple news that had seemingly been a reality for months.

But she knew that if she had one responsibility before going where she was supposed to go with her black dress and sad eyes, it was to check on Stefan. She knew that she wasn't really helping him all that much the previous day. And she found him in the Salvatore crypt, sitting on a bench. "Hey. How you feeling?"

"Hmm. I'm feeling better, which in my world means I haven't committed a homicide since I last saw you. I've been doing a lot of thinking today, a lot of wandering around, and this seemed like the most appropriate place to come," he then noticed the devastated look on her face and frowned in concern. "What's wrong?"

Natalie shrugged, wrapping her arms around her own waist as a way to comfort herself with physical contact. "It's my friend, or rather, our friend, Bonnie. I've been trying to contact her for months only that I now found out that she's been dead all along."

He hesitated for a moment as he wondered what he was supposed to answer with. He couldn't remember Bonnie, much less know how to comfort someone over her death. "Uh... What- what happened?"

Natalie unwrapped her arms from her waist and placed herself next to him on the bench with a sigh. "Don't ask, please. Because I can't think about it. I don't wanna think about it. Because after I lose someone I love and I actually think about it right afterwards, it never ends well."

He looked to the side and saw the brunette vampire who was obviously very vulnerable and devastated over the loss of one of her best friends and he didn't know what to say. "I'm sorry. I... I wish that I could remember her."

Natalie met his gaze and shrugged. "Be glad you don't. I wish I couldn't. It isn't the fact that you loved someone that makes it hard to let them go, it's remembering loving them and everything it gave you. And I just really want to be able to let people go."

He still had no idea what to say to make her feel better. "It's okay."

Natalie pursed her lips together as she felt the back of her eyes burn, knowing that her body wanted her to cry even when she didn't. "No, it isn't! It's nowhere near okay! I was trying so hard to become better and to let myself work through everything that I find hard, like letting go. And I was closer than I've ever been only for another person that I love to end up gone and now I'm just left with my abandonment issues, a whole lot of anger and sadness I don't know what to with because I'm sick of crying. And it's like I'm back to having no one."

"Me. You have me. Look, you were there for me last night even after what happened. Sounds like you're always there for me," he had finally found something to say that he meant and was so sure that he could do right as he placed his hand over hers. "So let me be there for you, okay?"

Natalie didn't really know how to respond, but she glanced down on his hand on top of hers and lifted her head to meet his gaze and let out a really small smile, but it was probably the most meaningful smile she'd smiled in a while.

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The Woods

They were having a small funeral for Bonnie, with only her friends who cared about her that actually were in town... and Damon. Jeremy had chosen the place so they wouldn't be interrupted. And he had a picture of Bonnie placed on a tree stump, where everyone had brought a memory of the witch they could leave.

Natalie had promised herself not to cry anymore, but the moment she saw Caroline leaving Bonnie her pom-pom on the tree stump, the thing she brought felt so much heavier. Followed by Matt leaving his lifeguard whistle, Elena releasing white feathers before bursting into tears and hugging Caroline and Damon leaving her grimoire.

Natalie was next as she met the sad eyes of her brother, a tear went down her cheek as she placed a teddy bear on the stump. The same teddy bear that she had given Bonnie that they called Mr. Cuddles that would be there for the late witch when Natalie couldn't, but it turned out that Bonnie was the one who couldn't.

Natalie left another tear to slip as she quietly walked back to Damon, Elena, Caroline and Matt. She stood next to the blonde boy and grabbed his hand in comfort, knowing that Caroline and Elena were holding onto each other and Damon was only really there for Elena.

But then Jeremy picked up a bell and rang it. "We ring this bell in honor of Bonnie, in remembrance for her. I'm not sure what else to say," he said as he put the bell down on the stump before looking to his side, making Natalie cry even more as she knew Bonnie was there with them. "She says that she's not going anywhere, that she has been here all along. Bonnie has watched you have the summer of your life."

Jeremy looked at a crying Elena with sadness in his eyes, but repeated words that Bonnie told him towards her. "And she saw you happy, and she knows you think now that you can't have a normal life that you have to be there for everyone, but you don't. Everyone will find their way, so you are gonna repack your things, you're gonna go back to college, and you're gonna live it up."

Bonnie moved on to Matt, who was trying his best to hold it together at the funeral, but he knew that he was too only moments away from a breakdown and tears kept slipping. "You didn't do anything wrong, Matt. You know she would have sent you three hundred e-mails back if she could. She misses you."

Jeremy then looked over at Natalie, who didn't seem ready to have Bonnie speak to her through Jeremy as she rested her head on Matt's shoulder as she cried. "Natalie, she wants you to know that she doesn't want this to bring you down. All summer, she watched you grow and fight to be who you want and get over your fears. She doesn't want to ruin that by dying. She wants you to keep growing." Natalie let out a sob as Matt wrapped his arm around her shoulder comfortingly and she cried into his chest as he was able to keep a few tears from falling. 

"Caroline, she watched you decorate that dorm room like your life depended on it!" his exclaimed as cheerfully as he could in the sad circumstances as Caroline let out a laugh through her tears. "And she knows that college isn't everything you expected and that you feel like something's missing, but... Tyler..."

The blonde vampire turned around and saw her hybrid boyfriend in a black suit walking up behind them and smiled slightly as she cried, running into his arms as quickly as she could in search for the comfort of the man she loved. Afterwards, he walked to the stump with all the things on and placed a single white rose on top.

Elena cried as she held onto Damon, Natalie cried into Matt's chest as he tried to keep himself from crying as much as usual as Caroline and Tyler held onto one another thankfully.

As for Jeremy, he was grasping Bonnie's hand, even if he couldn't feel it, he knew that her hand was wrapped around his as she spoke about how everyone needed it and she was glad to give it to them now that she was dead.

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A/N: I'm unfortunately starting school again on Monday so updates won't happen nearly as much as they did in the summer. All those updates were mostly just showing how I have no life and nothing to do during the summer. But I'll still update, but not as much.

Votes and comments are greatly appreciated.