A/N: I'm sorry I've been away for nearly a month. I'm currently dealing with an array of life issues that are causing me to feel unproductive, unmotivated and lose all senses of creativity and happiness. For this, I apologise for the lack of updates. Whilst this is all happening in this crazy head of mine, I hold a small amount of happiness in letting you know that I have a will to write today and so I will provide you with another chapter that is (hopefully) not full of shit. Sorry for being sad and stuff. I hope you are well. Thank you for reading.

I'm lying on the edge of a single bed when I wake up. Despite the size of Eliza and Alex's home, the room is lit with natural sunlight. I look to the side where the window is built into the wall, something I didn't notice the night before when I helped Matty stumble into the room, a little more drunk off his face and placing small kisses on my cheeks. My body tenses and my stomach flips and my first thought is: boy, do I miss him. I turn around and he is there, yet to disappear from my side. His back faces me but I can still tell his hair has fallen in his face and will surely irritate his nose when he wakes. The sleeves of the jumper I picked up from the van are too long for my small arms and I am sure I picked it up from Matty's side by mistake. I watch Matty's bare chest lift the sheets covering his torso up and down. I count the rhythms because I have nothing better to do, and because - leading on from last night's conversation - I care a lot more than I'm willing to let on. He stirs beside me and I close my eyes, pretending to be waking up at the same time. I bring my hands to my face and rub my eyes. Even though I'm faking it, the notion makes me tired and I think about closing my eyes and just drifting off.

But Matty's face is in front of me now. He's not smiling or speaking or making any sound, or movement for that matter. I think he has died with his eyes open for a moment, before he licks his lips.

I say: "As long as we don't die, this is gonna be one hell of a story."

"Good morning." He replies. He now rubs his temples, as if my words have made him remember all feeling. I furrow my eyebrows and crease my forehead, feeling the pain in my own.

"I regret stealing your drinks." I tell him.

He smiles, "I'd be feeling much worse if you hadn't."

"You're welcome."

His smile that had fallen is back on his lips quickly, a polite gesture before he gets up and leaves the room, returning approximately a minute and a few cupboards closing later. He has two glasses of water and two painkiller tablets each. He climbs back under the covers, placing his empty glass on the floor beside the bed.

"What I said last night was stupid." He says, facing me now.

"What are you talking about?"

"Saying you saved my life."

I nod, "I know what you meant."

"It's just," He twists around to lie on his back, "How long is this really going to last?"

"What?"

"My visa will run out and in a month I'll be back on a plane to England-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I raise my voice, barely thinking about the fact that there are four other sleeping somewhere in the house as well.

"What do you want me to say?" He sits up and I follow suite.

"Anything but this! Are you high or just fucking stupid?"

He straightens his back at this point and without another word gets out of bed, searches for his jeans, pulls them over his legs and stumbles out of the bedroom with his shirt halfway over his head. All while I sit up in bed, confused, wondering whether I said something wrong or he did. My head is spinning with everything happening so fast I don't manage to get out of bed before the front door slams and his foot steps aren't audible any longer. I grab a pair of pants at the side of the bed that I assume are mine and run out the door. When I close the door behind me, he's not there anymore and it's pouring down with rain. I'd been so distracted with Matty I barely noticed the weather outside was a nightmare.

I curse myself and turn back into the house. Eliza is up and standing in the hallway leading to the kitchen.

"Is everything alright?"

I shake my head and move past her, back into mine and Matty's temporary room. I slam the door behind me, this time not thinking at all about waking up the others. Matty's tantrum would have already woken them up by now. I cover myself with the bed sheets, crying as I do so. The tears are endless and my sobbing chokes through the bed sheets, clearly audible to the rest of the house as there's a dip in the mattress and a soft hand on my side. At first I think it's Matty, but the voice is too deep and I know it's Xavier. I pull the covers down to my neck, revealing my surely swollen eyes, pink lips and tear stained cheeks.

"What happened?"

"I don't know why I'm so upset." I say.

"Was Matty being a dick?" I nod.

It takes a while of silence but I eventually say: "He told me this wasn't going to be forever."

"You and him?" Xavier is taken aback by the remark, as surprised as I was.

"Yeah," I say softly, remembering what happened only fifteen minutes ago, "I don't know where he went, I tried running after him but he turned a corner or something."

"He'll be fine."

"I have a bad feeling."

"Why?" He asks me.

"I don't know. I think Matty's in trouble."

"So now you have psychic abilities?" Xavier's attempt to lighten the mood is made to no avail. I pout my lips, my stomach churning and feeling ultimately as heavy as my chest and arms. "I think you're hungry."

Xavier pulls the covers from over me and pushes them to the end of the bed. He helps me to the bathroom, my body is shaking slightly from anxiety and stress and I wish I wasn't so vulnerable but I am. Matty's words were quick but they hurt and as much as I tried not to think about it, I'm afraid I got too close to him before I could realise what was happening. I wash my face in the bathroom and Xavier is waiting for me just beside the door with a worried look on his face. It disappears when he sees me, and replaces the worry with a smile. It is sympathetic but it hurts less. I sit down at the table and talk to Alex as if nothing had happened. While I'm trying to forget and force the tears back, Ben and Xavier are having a quiet discussion at the doorway. Ben has disappeared through the front door multiple times now. I look over to them and catch Xavier's eye. They say something and walk back into the kitchen, carrying on my act and speaking as if everything is fine.

I lose my appetite at this point. I'm no longer hungry and what I need is some comfort but the only warmth I can think of right now is Matty's chest but he's not here: he walked out the front door without an explanation. As I'm leaving to get up I catch Ben speaking to Alex, he says: "We can't reach Matty's phone."

"You can't find him?" I spin around, catching them all off guard.

Ben and Xavier look at each other, deciding on who's going to say what next.

"I'm sure he'll pick up eventually. He's probably just sitting down somewhere-"

"Yeah fucking right," I cut in, "when it's pissing down with rain and he hasn't got a jacket. Why the fuck are we still sitting in here?"

A sudden panic washes over me as I run into the bedroom and grab my phone off the sheets, pulling Matty's jacket of the floor and sliding my own over my shoulders as I race to the front door.

"Where are you going?"

"For a walk! Where do you think?" I don't look into the kitchen as I pass it.

Xavier grabs my arm before I can leave the house.

"We don't know where Matty is, but we have a better chance of finding him all together than you do alone. Just wait thirty seconds so we can grab our jackets and we'll help you. All you have to do is ask, Desireé." I can feel myself welling up at his words so I just nod, keeping the door open and letting the cool air calm the overwhelming sensation in my bones.

Eliza appears at the door: "Matty sure is a whole lot of trouble." she says, her accent thick.

"He's worth it." I speak casually but her next words anger me.

"Is he really?" They are harsh and dictating and incredibly rude: "I heard what he said to you. He doesn't sound like a-"

"You don't shit about him Eliza. You met him twelve hours ago." I stand my ground, "Leave him the fuck alone."

"No need to get bitter." She says sweetly as Xavier and Ben return, looking at her as they rush to my side.

I walk out without another word, followed by Matty's two friends. I don't know where we're going even though I'm walking ahead of the two people who have a vague idea of where he might be. I continuously look behind me to make sure I'm going the right way. My hands are in my pockets and my eyes are scanning every corner, every alley and every possible place Matty could be hiding out.

"We need to look in every bar." Ben announces. I look back and he's nodding over at a shabby wooden bar that looks more like a run down cabin than anything else. I don't question him, I let him lead and I follow because I honestly don't know much about Matty - at least not enough to know where he'd be in a situation like this.