one month later

"No wayyy you're cheating!!"

"You're just jealous that I'm beating your ass! Ha! Take that 'Mr. boss of a dance studio'! Who would have thought your employee would be better than you at dance dance revolution!"

Jungkook laughed like there was no tomorrow, jumping around and making a fool out of himself at the arcade, but he didn't care, he felt so free.

Him and Hoseok have been getting on very well together, he's been living with him for about a month now and he had no complains whatsoever.

"Okay fine you win this time, but I will definitely beat you at bowling later! You just watch!" Hoseok pointed a threatening finger at him and squinted his eyes while both males made their way to a cash machine.

"Sure thing, I'd like to see you try." Jungkook giggled cutely. Intoxicated with the couple of drinks they had at the bar, he stared at the older as he took out some more change from the machine.

"Okay where to next? We still need approximately: two hundred and fifty-six tickets until we can get you that big plushie that you've wanted."

__________

Later that evening the two boys were walking around town hand in hand, Jungkook was smiling ear to ear as he hugged the insanely huge plushie close to him. It was so soft! Totally worth spending every penny.

The sky was getting dark so they decided to make their way back to Hoseok's apartment after some time. It was much bigger than the one he and Taehyung had, he did live closer to the centre of Seoul after all. The big city was still lively at this hour, but it felt like it was just the two of them in the world at that moment.

"I had a lot of fun today. Thank you for taking me out." Jungkook glanced over at the older to find him already staring back, it made his heart skip a beat; but.. did he feel the spark? He wasn't sure.

Hoseok squeezed his hand slightly in response. "I had fun too, I'm glad we were able to do this. You know what this reminds me of? The old days. Remember how you said you wanted for us to be able to go out and hold hands one day? Well.. we are finally doing it!" He smiled sheepishly and looked down at his feet.

Jungkook's lips slightly tugged down for some reason. Don't get him wrong, he felt extremely grateful to have Hoseok in his life and he couldn't be happier that they were still getting along after all those years. Of course he liked him and he wanted this ever since he was a young boy, so why did he feel hesitant to take their relationship that one step further? Why did it feel so wrong when he was having so much fun with him?

He guessed a lot has happened and he changed massively throughout the years, so he just didn't know if he was able to love him the same way he did all those years ago. The main reason for this was obvious though, but Jungkook was trying his best to ignore it.

"Yeah.. it feels surreal." He whispered. Thankfully Hoseok didn't feel the slight shift in atmosphere and kept strutting forward with a big smile plastered on his face.

Once they got back, Jungkook took a long and hot shower while the other prepared them something to eat. He took that time to have a moment to think. He thought back to the day he left his and Taehyung's shared apartment. The older spammed his phone non stop after that and Jungkook eventually blocked him. This wasn't his initial plan and he really wanted to fix things with him, but the more time passed, the less he thought about it and just wanted to escape from reality.

He hasn't even checked up on Taehyung which did leave him feeling extremely guilty. Above all, they were still friends before any of this, so it was a shitty move on his part to not even see if his best friend was doing okay.

Once he got out of the shower — barely even having time to wipe his hands — Jungkook launched himself onto his phone and texted Jimin right away. He just had to at least make sure that Taehyung was okay and Jimin was his only source. He knew it was quite late and that he most likely wouldn't answer him until the next morning, but he had to get it off his chest.

Jungkook:
hey jimin i'm sorry for texting u so late i know ur probably already sleeping but is it okay if i ask u for a favour?

Jungkook:
can you please check up on tae and how he's doing? i feel like an asshole for blocking him and never actually speaking a single word to him for an entire month..

Jungkook:
if he did something to himself jimin i.. i don't know if i could ever forgive myself, especially as a friend of many years that's just a shitty thing to do..

Jungkook:
oh and say hi to yoongi from me, i will try to visit u guys soon, i'm sorry i've been away even tho i still see you at work it's not the same.. :( goodnight

Jungkook put down his phone and sighed. Well that's done, all he has to do now is wait patiently for a response. He just hopes that Taehyung is taking care of himself at least. The thing is, he would check up on him on his own, but he just feels like it would be very weird to pop up out of nowhere and start acting like he cared again. He always cared.. obviously, but he doesn't know how Taehyung would react to it.

"Hey Jungkook you okay in there? The food is ready and I picked a movie for us to watch if you're down." Hoseok knocked on the door gently and pulled him back to reality. Jungkook was almost completely dry without even using a towel due to standing there for so long.

"Yeah sorry I will be out in a minute! Sure we can watch something, thanks Hobi hyung!" He answered while starting to dry his hair in super speed, fluffing it up and making it messy in the process.

"Alright." With that Hoseok walked away from the door but not without catching himself smiling at the old nickname. Eventually Jungkook got dressed in pyjamas before joining him on the couch.

__________

After finishing off their food, both males were cuddled up on the couch halfway through a movie, when Jungkook initiated the first move and started kissing Hoseok's neck and jawline.

"Ahh Jungkook.. where did that come from?" Hoseok chuckled at the way his soft hair tickled the side of his face.

Jungkook hummed in response before moving up to meet him eye to eye and bit his lip. "I don't know.. just felt like it." He slowly closed off the gap between them and kissed him. The older grabbed his face into his hands and deepened the kiss without hesitation.

They have done this a couple times in the span of that month and even slept with each other. The older knew how to take care of him well and always did it in a way that made him feel wanted. Jungkook knew that Hoseok genuinely liked him.

It did feel weird at times though, no matter how much he tried to keep Taehyung out of his head, he would still creep up at the back of his mind in the worst moments. It was exhausting and he felt so bad for Hoseok because he was always clueless about it. The guilt was definitely there.

Jungkook was about to climb onto Hoseok's lap when he was gently pushed away, he fluttered open his eyes in confusion. "Wait I need to tell you something." The older took a deep breath and sighed before pushing his fingers through his hair.

"I don't think we should keep doing this." Hoseok said after a moment of silence.

"Oh.." Jungkook swallowed thickly and looked away. Did he do something wrong? Was he not interested in him after all? Was it all in his head?

"And before you say anything, no it has nothing to do with feelings because I'm sure you already know that I've always been into you. Think I've always made it a bit obvious." He chuckled to himself while scratching his arm awkwardly, he finally turned his body towards him and got a little more serious.

"I kind of realised that you lost interest in me a long time ago, and so I stopped trying to pursue a relationship with you, even though we were on good terms. I really enjoyed this month so far and you are welcome to stay here for as long as you need, but I think it's best if we keep this uh.. thing between us — strictly platonic. As much as I like you Jungkook, I know that your heart longs for someone else, it's very apparent and I just think it's a little unfair to the both of us if we keep this going."

Jungkook didn't know what to say. He was right. It was selfish of him to do this. Hoseok was trying to say it in the nicest way possible but he knew it must definitely be hard for him. He never saw him as a tool to get back at Taehyung, he could never even imagine that, but it probably felt that way for Hoseok. It was very wrong of him to get involved while having feelings for someone else, he knew that very well; yet he still did it.

"I'm sorry Hobi.. you're right. Despite our past we just kind of went separate ways and lost contact for a couple of years. I always kind of kept you at the back of my head but yeah.. eventually I did lose feelings. When I joined your company I was so happy to have you back in my life again, but it wasn't the same anymore. I'm sorry if I led you on, it wasn't right of me." Jungkook's eyes wandered all over the room while talking, finding it hard to keep eye contact as he felt embarrassed and ashamed for his actions.

"I understand, you were allowed to start having feelings for other people, I really don't blame you because we did lose contact anyway. To be honest, when you first called me up that night to come to your house I felt hesitant. I was always convinced that you and Taehyung were dating, so when you said that you weren't, I was so confused. Ever since I saw you guys together at that party I did my best to move on, but hearing that you were single that night made me a bit selfishly happy. Guess I was wrong though, because I can tell you still have feelings for him, right?"

Jungkook was a little confused because he never really talked to him about Taehyung, so what could have possibly made him think that they were dating?

"Wait what party are you talking about?"

Hoseok tilted his head to the side and looked at him as if he expected him to be joking. "Oh.. that's a genuine question? Uh, y'know how there was this huge graduation party on your and Taehyung's last year of college? Maybe you don't remember, but I was there too and we talked briefly and that's how we got to exchange phone numbers again. But you were very drunk that night so I don't blame you if you forgot. Well anyway.. I saw you and Taehyung making out, so from then on I knew it was too late—"

"Wait what?!" Jungkook paused for a few seconds, his eyes furrowed in thought and shock. "Oh my god— I don't remember this.. can you give me some more details? Are you s-sure that was us?" Jungkook was so confused and did his best to reach back with his memory, but he had no recollection of anything like that ever happening. Sure, he remembers the party now that the older mentioned it — but kissing Taehyung? That's impossible! He wasn't sure if he even had feelings for him at that point yet.

"Jungkook, I'm sure of it. I had my eyes on you that entire evening.. not in a creepy way of course just.. agh you know what I mean." Hoseok paused and threaded his fingers through his hair nervously.

"You drank a lot that night and at some point I saw you and Taehyung both fall into the pool and just start making out I guess. Maybe you hit your head on the way or something? Or maybe you were just that black out drunk. I honestly don't know what to tell you.."

Jungkook was at a loss of words. Did Taehyung know about this? That was the only thing he could think of. Did both of them just simply forget such a thing ever happening? And if Taehyung did remember it, then why would he keep it away from him all this time? Why did it happen in the first place if Jungkook didn't even know about his feelings towards him yet at that point? Or was this just a spur of the moment thing that they did in their drunken and impulsive state with no reason at all??

He tried going to bed with a cloudy head that night. All those questions floated around his brain and wouldn't let him sleep. He didn't know what to make of this, he was convinced that it was impossible for something like this to happen.

So, as any person would in that position, Jungkook decided to find proof. The sleep deprived boy went to the living room quietly and booted up his laptop while getting comfy on the couch. He didn't want to wake Hoseok up and worry him, but he needed to know more and he needed it NOW.

He logged into his facebook account that he hasn't touched in years, among other social medias he used to have back in his college days. His goal was to find any traces of that night, whether it be messages or posts that were made around that time, even the smallest amount of information could go a long way.

After staying up most of the night, Jungkook was at the verge of giving up and falling asleep, but then he found a photo that made his heart skip a beat. It was posted by a random person from their college that he has never even seen before. In the photo, there was a couple standing together and smiling into the camera, but what caught Jungkook's eye in particular was the big pool behind them, or rather, what was inside it.

If he zoomed in enough, he could make out two figures with their arms wrapped around each other, so the faces were covered. To his luck, Jungkook could recognise his own hair from a mile away, giving the fact he had bright red hair at the time. Nothing could convince him otherwise that this wasn't him, and that was all the proof he needed.

Finally after finding what he's been looking for, he was able to go to sleep with some sort of reassurance. But of course, he still had tons of unanswered questions. After saving the photo and transferring it to his phone, he decided to just stay on the couch for the rest of the night and passed out almost immediately.

Slipping away into dreamland in oblivious bliss, nothing could have prepared him for the message that he received the next morning.

Jimin:
jungkook i don't know how to tell you this but.. taehyung left a note saying that he's leaving the country