*3 am*

It was a cool and dark morning. Great for patrolling the streets. And inside a car on the side of the road were two cops. Sipping coffee and eating doughnuts. 

Then a car sped past them.

One of the officers used their quirk to tell how fast the car was going while the other used his to see who was in the car. 

"Woah! Yuya, did you see that?! 65 on a 40! Just who does this manic person think they are!?" They grilled.

The other cop snorted,  "Relax Sora, it's just Shoto Todoroki. My best guess is that he's on his way to annoy Bakugou again." Sora settled down and chuckled, "It's like three in the morning. Does Todoroki have a death wish or something?" Yuya took another sip of his coffee and shrugged.

Then another car sped past them.

"80 on a 40!! A Speed Demon!!" Sora growled. "More like a rushing peacekeeper. It's just Eijiro Kirishima. He's probably trying to make it to Bakugou's before Todoroki." Yuya grinned.

The two cops just looked at each other and sighed.

"They haven't changed since U.A.

…………….…………….…………….……
…………….…………….…………….……

*Time skip to Baku's place*

Kirishima pulls up to his best friend's house. "Yes! I got here before Todoroki did." He sighed. He walked to the door and immediately started banging. "Yo! Bakugou! Open up, bro!" Kiri called out. Then the door swung open, followed by a "WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU YELLING IDIOT?!" Generously given from the one and only Katsuki Bakugou. 
Just then another car recklessly turned into the driveway. And by recklessly I mean almost driving into Katsuki's garage. 

"The Hell?! What's Icyhot doing here!?!" The spiky blond yelled.

Todoroki made haste to get out of the car. A little too much haste for he fell tripping over the seat. "How'd Kirishima get here before me?" He mumbled to himself, still on the ground.

'It's three in the morning, a shitty-haired moron is standing next to me, and a heterochromatic idiot is laying in my front yard….. How did my life end up like this?' Katsuki silently thought to himself. He turned to his redheaded friend and finally asked "Oi! Shitty hair, what the actual fuck is this about?"

Kirishima averted his eyes and scratched the back of his neck. "Well….." But before he could even start. His face was kissing the ground as Todoroki pushed him out of the way.

"HEYYYY BESTIE!!" Shoto screams, pulling Katsuki in for a hug. 

"Get the fuck off me! I'm not your fucking bestie you Icyhot bastard!" Hissed the blond. He struggled to get out of the idiot's grasp.

Todoroki nodded his head vigorously. "Yes, you are. You said so yourself." Katsuki's eyes twitched in confusion. "When the ever-burning hell did I say that?!" This was seriously pissing him off.

"You said it during our first year of high school," Kirishima answers, standing up and brushing himself off. "And OW DUDE! THAT WAS NOT MANLY!" Kiri cried out.

Todoroki gave a small grin. "Don't worry, my best friend Katsuki will make you some food as an apology." The other shook his head. "NO, I WON'T! AND STOP CALLING ME YOUR 'BEST FRIEND'!! I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU AS A PERSON!!! DID YOU COME HERE JUST TO ANNOY ME?! I'LL KILL YOU!!!" The blond threatened, making small explosions in his palms.

Todoroki gave a smug look and swung his arm over his best friend's shoulder, leading them inside the house. "Chill out Bestie-gou. Can't I just come over once in a while to see my best friend?" He asked with a smile. Bakugou wanted nothing more than to blow it off his face. "Yeah but no, we actually have a valid reason for being here," Kirishima stated. "We've got a kid in the car. Said his mom got kidnapped and has nowhere else to go….." he trailed off. "Well…. Nowhere but his dad." Todoroki finished.

Katsuki cocked his brow in confusion, “So? What the fuck does that have to do with me? Are you two pro heroes so incompetent that you can’t find the brat’s father and search for his mother? How did you idiots get past the first day of U.A?” he scolded.

“Easy. Aizawa said he was lying about expelling us. And he loves us.” shrugged Todo. “And we did find the kid’s father,” Kiri added. Bakugou blankly stared at the two men. They were giving extremely vague information and Katsuki was sick of it. “Okay ANNNNDDDD- where is the bastard?” 

Kirishima made serious eye contact with Todoroki before nodding and walking to the car. Todo then turned to Katsuki, “His father’s address is XXXX-XXXX street.” he informed. Bakugou tilted his head in annoyance, “That's my address, you dipshit.” “I know…” Shoto replied in his monotone voice.

The blond hero stared at the other beside him, trying to connect whatever pieces were given to him. “What the fuck are you trying to say? ......That I’m that kid’s father. That’s absolute bullshit! Look, I’ll help look for the brat’s mom, but I am no one’s, old man.” He concluded. The walking frosted strawberry sighed “Oh how I wish my shitty father would disown me like you. That would be great.” Bakugou facepalms in annoyance. It was way too early for this.

Just then, Kirishima came in with the young teen. Everyone went silent.

The two blonds had a very intense staring contest. The tension between them was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Finally, without looking away from the young blond, he asks “Kirishima, who’s the brat?” But before Kiri could answer, the boy spoke, “I’m your son.”

Katsuki shook his head in denial, “No, you’re not.”
Haru aruged, “Yes, I am.” 
K- “No, you’re not.”
H- “Yes, I am.”
K- “No.”
H- “Yes.”
K- “No.”
H- “Yes.”
K- “No.”
H- “Yes.”
K- “No.”
H- “Yes.”
K- “No.”
H- “Yes.”
K- “No.”
H- “No.”
K- “Yes.”
H- “No.”
K- “Yes.”
H- “No.”
K- “Yes.”
H- “No!”
K- “Yes!”
H- “No!”
K- “Yes!”
H- “No, I Am Not!”
K- “Yes, You Are!”
H- “NO, I AM NOT YOUR SON!!”
K- “YES, YOU ARE MY SON- oh you sneaky little shit.”

“Well, I guess that settled that. Now on to the next issue.” Todoroki intervened. He grabbed Katsuki by the arms and started shaking him rapidly, “WHY THE FUCK DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU HAD A CHILD?!! YOU KNOW SECRET LOVE CHILDREN ARE MY THING!!!” he screamed.

Kirishima ran his fingers through his hair in bewilderment, “Wow, I can’t believe Katsuki Bakugou is a father.” “I'm NOT a father! Are you bastards that stupid? He’s like 6 years old.” the other growled. “I’m 13, you jackass.” snapped Haru. “Okay and I’m 26. That makes you half my age. Which means I’d have to be like 14 to be your father.” Katsuki stated, putting his hand on his hip. Haru rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, “You were 15, but go off I guess.” “Alright, what complete idiot would have the patience to be with me, especially as an asshole teenager. Not to brag but people quaked in their boots when I walked by. No one dared look me in the eye. Nobody was that stupid. Katsuki smirked with pride. “Weird flex but okay.” shrugged the spiky redhead. 

“My mom said he used to stare at you all the time,” Haru added. The older blond scoffed, “And who is your mother?” “Deku.” Haru blankly stated.

Katsuki.exe has stopped working.

“I thought you said your mom’s name is Izuku?” Shoto questions. The boy turns to Todoroki, “He knows exactly who I’m talking about.” he said before slowly turning back to the other blond with sickenly sweet eyes and a smile, “Right, Kacchan?"

Katsuki Bakugou is experiencing some technical difficulties, please stand by. We are now rebooting and processing.

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Processing Complete. Now uploading Katsuki Bakugou.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

A/N: Guess who's back? Back again? I am Back! Tell a friend. (ಡωಡ)♡♡