Watching a One Direction concert from backstage is probably not the ideal location to get the full experience, but it was exactly where I wanted to be that night. The unlimited, free, alcoholic beverages certainly helped, and by the end I was singing along with every song, making up the words as I went.
"You must be Harry's girl?" The Irish one asked as he came off stage when the show ended and gave me a high five.
"His girl?" I giggled, starting to feel my cheeks go numb after the alcohol. "I guess so."
"I'm Niall," he introduced himself.
"Thanks." I smiled, and he looked at me oddly before walking away to put his guitar away. 'Why did I thank him??' I thought, and waited for Harry. He and Louis exited the stage a few minutes later. Seeing me, Harry's face lit up into a smile made of actual rainbows.
"Ellie!" He opened his arms to welcome me into a hug.
"Harry...you're drenched?" I stepped away, and he looked down at his soaked shirt.
"Oh, yeah, Louis threw his water bottle at me," he gave Louis a nudge as we walked to the dressing room. "So, what did you think?"
"Great! A lot of energy. Your fans really love you guys," I answered. "I'm happy that you sound better than before, at the bookstore. I was worried this was going to suck major balls."
Harry and I both laughed, but Louis looked confused. "You sang to her?"
"Just for fun, I was trying to sound bad, don't worry about it," Harry answered quickly.
"What was your favorite song?" Louis asked.
"Ummm," my mind suddenly went blank. "Well, I don't really know any of the names of your songs, but... there was one, like, 'The Best Dog Ever' or something?"
They both snickered, and even Niall, still putting his guitar away, laughed. "It's actually, 'The Best Song Ever'." Harry corrected.
"Well, if that's how you feel... That's a little conceited, don't you think?" I teased.
"No, that's the title. It's 'Song' not 'Dog.' But that would be a good song, maybe on our next album," Harry added and Louis nodded.
"We should write more songs about dogs. Speaking of which, did you see that dildo someone threw on stage?" Louis asked me. "It was massive!" He held up his hands to indicate the size.
I shrugged. "Eh, it wasn't too big." They both stared at me in shock, a little smile forming on Harry's lips. "I'm just kidding!"
"How did dogs make you think of that?" Harry asked him and scrunched his nose in distaste.
"They both began with 'd' don't be gross," Louis defended and gave Harry a light shove.
"Is that kind of thing normal?" I asked once they'd settled down.
They shrugged. "We've had worse. Usually it's bras and stuff like that."
"Worse?" I didn't even want to know.
"Tampons," Louis whispered.
"Eww!!" I shrieked. "Like, uh, new ones, I hope?"
"New?" Harry and Louis both looked confused, and I didn't want to elaborate what that meant.
"They were not used, if that's what you're asking," Liam clarified. "And, we've got to bounce." He put his hand on Louis' shoulder.
"Right, that thing." Louis replied and started to follow him. "See you, Ellie!"
"Looks like we're all alone now," I said, and from behind Harry somewhere, Niall shouted, "No, I'm still here! Don't have sex yet!" as he quickly put his guitar away.
I think Harry might have blushed, but it was hard to tell in the dim lighting. "I wasn't planning on having sex in the dressing room, but if you insist, Niall..." Harry called back to him and pretended to unbutton his already half unbuttoned shirt.
"Stop, not here," I laughed and put my hand on his. He had a glint in his eye I hadn't seen before, and maybe it was from the adrenaline from performing, or maybe it was something else, but his demeanor changed.
"Really?" He asked quietly, and whether he intentionally bit his lip or not, I'm not sure, but it was all I needed.
"Or, maybe here?" I asked and raised my eyebrow.
"Yup, I'll lock the door on my way out," Niall announced as he made his way to the door.
As the door clicked shut I felt his hands at the clasp of my bra, my shirt already on the floor. My fumbling hands got the last few buttons of his wet shirt undone and then got started on his tight black pants.
"Harry," I said as I tugged them off him. "I just want you to know that I consent, 100%, even though I have had a bit to drink."
He laughed, and helped me get his pants off. "Thanks, that's good to know. I wasn't worried, but I appreciate the clarification."
"Well, I didn't want you to think you were using me?" I explained as he worked on removing the rest of my clothes. "I know this is your last night, and I'd understand if you wanted to have a one-night-stand kind of thing before you left town, and I don't want you to feel guilty about it given my condition."
He stopped removing my sock and sat down on the couch next to me, clad only in his underpants. "Ellie, that's not how I see this at all," he looked a little sad, so I looked away. "I have really enjoyed the past few days with you, and I don't want it to end just because I'm leaving Canada. I kind of hoped you felt the same way..."
I bit my lip as I tried to figure out how to fix this. I'd hurt his feelings, that was the opposite of what I'd meant to do. "I do feel the same way, I just didn't want you to think I was trying to hook up with you because you're, you know, Harry Styles."
He gave me a funny look, and the hint of a smile appeared on his lips. "I mean, that is why I like you. Because you're you." I corrected. "See, this is what I mean-- I've been drinking, but I know what I'm doing, I swear!"
He nodded. "Alright, now that that's cleared up, shall we..."
"Start where we left off?" I nodded. "I have condoms in my purse if you need one. I always carry them, I wasn't planning for this. I just like to be prepared." He laughed as I pulled one out and tossed it to him.
He looked it over and laughed. "Has it been a while, perhaps? It's expired." He got up to throw it away and rifled through some stuff on a table. "No worries, I think there's a box of some around here somewhere."
I'm not sure why they keep condoms in their dressing room, perhaps this happened often? That thought did not cross my mind, honestly, there was not much happening in my head--not with what Harry was doing to me.
* * *
"Is this a butterfly?" I peeled my face off his chest once we'd caught our breath to get a better look at it. I had been a bit distracted before and didn't really notice all the tattoos. I traced my finger around the edges of the butterfly and smiled. "I love butterflies," I added quietly.
"That tickles," he replied sleepily. I looked up and his eyes were fluttering shut.
"Perhaps we should get you back to your hotel room." I started to get up, but he pulled me back.
"Just a few more minutes. We head out around 3."
I checked my phone, and it was almost 2:00 AM. "Okay," I replied and tucked my head back into the nook between his collarbone and jaw. We'd only known each other for a few days, but this felt so right, so comfortable, and I didn't want it to end.
* * *
When we finally made it to the tour bus everyone was waiting for Harry.
"If you want, I can leave you my hair brush in case you get lonely," he teased with a smirk.
'Damn Louis!' I thought. "That won't be necessary, I'll just use my fingers!" I teasingly waved my hands at him, but he looked confused.
"What?" He cocked his head to the side and his hair flopped over his forehead.
"Sorry, I thought Louis told you about... nevermind." I saw Louis coming over and I shut up.
"I thought I heard my name. Did you get your hair sorted out?" He teasingly asked me.
"Yes." I nodded. "And thanks for not telling Harry the whole story about his hair brush." I added sarcastically.
"I'm still confused about it myself," Louis shrugged.
"I was running my hands through my hair to brush it! Nevermind," they were both laughing at me, so I gave up. Louis was called over to the tour bus, and Harry and I stood quietly for a moment.
"So, I guess this is goodbye?" I looked up at him, and he had the same sadness in his eyes as I did.
"For now," he tried to smile. "I know we've only known each other a couple days, but I really think there's something here, not to sound too cliche."
I shrugged and wrapped my arms around myself. We said we'd talk, but what more could really happen between us? A guy like him doesn't even keep girls like me on the side, let alone actual dating. It had been a fun few days, and I was starting to accept that this was it. Despite my attempts not to touch him and further this connection, he leaned in to hug me goodbye. My arms unwillingly found themselves wrapped around him.
'Okay, but no kissing, Ellie. That would be too much'.
But, his hands slowly embraced my face gently, and after a moment of looking into each other's eyes, our lips connected. And damn it was awesome. I didn't want it to end, but the tour bus was waiting and Louis stuck his head out to yell at Harry.
He pulled a way and we laughed at Louis, but our smiles melted. "I'll see you later."
And with that he was off, only taking a look back to wave as he climbed on the bus.