"I don't think that I was ever trying to kill myself, but I knew that if I'd gone too far, I wouldn't care." -Demi Lovato

I suppose I should probably introduce myself. My name is Leah Alexandria Davis, but everyone just calls me Alex. I'm 19 years old, and I share an apartment in New York City with my best friend. Rebekah Marie Johnson and I have been best friends since we were 15 years old. We moved into this apartment together after graduating high school a few months ago. It was a surprise to everyone in our hometown of Nashville, Tennessee that we were moving to New York.

I never had a good life at home, but I wasn't abused. Physically, anyway. My dad was never around and my mother made it completely obvious I was never good enough. Rebekah was the only person who could go from making me laugh to having the most serious conversation with me in a heartbeat, and that's what I love most about her.

Anyway, we moved here from Tennessee, like I said before, to go to a photography school. And when I say my mother had a major overreaction, that's only an understatement. She went on a total rampage.

"What do you mean you're moving to New York?!" she yelled.

I replied calmly, like I always do when she starts yelling at me, "Photography school."

"You'll never be good enough! Do you have any idea how much this is going to cost?!" she was still yelling and she didn't show signs of stopping any time soon.

"I got a full four-year scholarship. They obviously think I'm good enough," I said.

I didn't let her respond. I ran to my room, locked my door, and stuffed my earbuds into my ears and turned my music up as loud as it would go. I didn't know what life would be like in New York, but I knew it had to be better than the hell I was living in now.

But enough about my background and all these sappy feelings about things you really don't care about. You're probably still wondering what the quote up there means. Don't worry, I'm getting to that.

It all started with a boy.

Now, before you jump ahead and think that this is like every other stupid teenage love story you've ever read, which it will more than likely end up being, let me explain.

This boy, Jamie Christian Follese, is the love of my life. Okay, so maybe he's never been the love of my life, but he might as well be. See, he completely shattered my heart, and he doesn't even know I exist. Stupid, right?

He's in one of those typical high school bands you always here about, though most of them don't make it big. His band, however, did. That doesn't happen until later though, but it did break my heart even more. It's not that I wasn't happy for them, I just get jealous easily. And if there's one thing I know about girls, it's that they love eye candy. And Jamie is definitely one of those people.

Ryan, Jamie's older brother, is one of my closest friends. Which, when you think about it, is weird considering the fact that his brother doesn't even know I'm alive. Ryan had pretty much figured out that I was in love with his brother from the moment I saw him.

"Leah Alexandria." I hate when Ryan does that.

"Must you call me that?"

"Only when you don't tell me you're in love with my brother!"

My eyes widened as I stumbled on my words, "What... What are you talking about? I am not in love with your brother. I don't even know him!"

"Alex, I may be a guy, but I know that look. You're in love with Jamie."

"And you're on crack! I'm not! I don't know him! He doesn't know I'm alive! Moving on now!"

I moved my eyes to something other than Ryan, which just screams 'I'm totally lying right now!'. But I couldn't help it. It was a bad habit, and he could tell.

I heard Ryan sigh, "So, you're coming to our show tonight, aren't you?"

"I wouldn't miss it as long as I get in free and front row center."

He laughed, "Don't you always?"

"Yes, I suppose I do," I smiled back at him.