Chapter Forty-Three

Audrey saw home in the distance. Her big white ranch house with two stories, wrap around porches and a balcony on the back where the master bedroom was located. Hanging baskets of flowers, large barns and corrals full of horses she had bred and raised. Audrey had missed this place. 

And despite her worries of what would become of it during her absence, Audrey saw that Pete, Jake, Elliot and Anna had kept the place running smooth. Audrey should have known they would but she'd always been a bit controlling and certain that things would fall apart without her. 

"Damn..." Ance mumbled behind her. "That's a house." 

"Mama and pa bought it when they got married," Penelope informed him. "I love it here! There's lots of animals."

"It was little more than a ramshackle cabin when we moved here." Audrey smiled at the memory. "We built the bigger house after selling a couple good horses before Penelope was born." 

"You sure ain't hurting for money, are you?" Ance grumbled. 

"Ya got ya a rich one, Ansel!" Irish laughed jovially. "I wish I could have gotten her to fall for my charms before she fell for ya." 

Audrey laughed lightly as Ance glared at the Irishman. Irish had insisted on coming with them, though he swore it was only because he needed to head in that direction to start up his new business venture--selling household wares door to door--and then of course relieving home owners of a few of their own belongings while he was there--without their knowledge. 

It had taken them nearly a month get here. A month of traveling, stopping from town to town, sleeping in Ance's arms each night and waking up in his arms each morning. A month of falling more in love with him, of watching her daughter fall more in love with him, of growing more and more attached to the idea of a family. 

But soon Ance would be leaving.... He hadn't mentioned wanting to stay and Audrey would not ask him to. She had told him she would never ask him for commitment beyond faithfulness and she meant that. She wouldn't ask him for more and be the one to push him away. 

That was the one thing that made her homecoming less than perfect. 

"Ance! Come to the barn, Ance! I can show you my favorite pony!" Penelope exclaimed from where she rode with Ance on his mare. 

"We'll all go to the barn," Audrey assured her. "I'd like to speak to Elliot about how things have been going around here and I can see him at the main barn." 

"Ms. Reynolds!" Jake cried when he saw them approaching. "Penelope!" Jake was a nice boy. Only seventeen but strong and smart and saving up a bit of money to pay for good schooling back east. He came running to them as they approached the corral and then paused as he took in the sight of Ance. 

Audrey knew Ance painted an intimidating picture, especially  with the protective way he was glaring at Pete with his arm wrapped securely around Penelope's middle. "Pete, is blacky and sunshine okay?" Penelope asked happily. 

"Yeah." Pete pulled off his hat and ran his hand through his shaggy brown hair. "Yeah, they're doing just great, Penelope. They've missed you something awful though. It sure is good to see you back in one piece." 

"I suppose I have a few introductions to make," Audrey finally cut in. "Pete this is Irish," she announced pointing at the man who bowed deeply in his cart seat. "And that is Ance. Without the help of these men, I never would have gotten Penelope back." 

"What exactly happened to her, Ms. Reynolds? And where's Marshall York?" 

Audrey felt her body stiffen at mention of that name. She shook her head and fixed Pete with a stern glare. "We'll discuss all of that later." 

He nodded quickly but he was clearly confused. "Sure..." 

"If you'll excuse me, I'd like to go speak with Elliot." Audrey dismounted and headed for the barn. She knew that Ance and Irish would see to Penelope and honestly, this ranch meant a lot to Audrey. She was eager to hear about how it had been doing during her long absence. 

"You sure are a sight for sore eyes," Elliot announced when Audrey came to stand beside him at the barn door. 

"So are you," she assured him and the dusty, sun wrinkled, work-hardened old man wrapped her in a tight hug. "It sure is good to have you home. Anna was getting mighty worried." 

Audrey pictured the man's wife in her mind. Her wrinkled face, tight bun and white hair contrasted with the warmth of her blue eyes and the brightness of her smile. "We're back safe and sound thanks to some friends I made along the way," Audrey assured him. "I've a long story to tell you, though I'd rather only tell it once to everyone and have it be without Penelope's ears around to hear." 

"I understand. I see that the Marshall isn't with you. I never did care for him... did you learn not to trust that devil?" 

"Yes, I did." Audrey chewed her lip and fought off her own regrets about the way she had trusted such a rotten man. "How has the ranch been?" 

"Running smooth. We've had a bit of trouble with some fences falling down but that just needed a bit of love and care... it'd been a while since we'd fixed 'em real good. Pete got bit by a rattler out in the woodshed shortly after you left but he healed up fine from it. That mare you bred to Lightning had a colt and let me tell you, he's his daddy's son through and through--or shows promise of it with that temper." 

Audrey head spun at the onslaught of information. "That's real good." 

She saw Penelope leading Ance by the hand to the pony corral. Ance's gaze kept coming to her but Audrey avoided it. She wasn't at all sure how she would handle it when the man finally decided to say goodbye. So instead of thinking about that, she turned her attention back to her horses and hearing about all the goings on at the ranch in the last few months. 

***

Audrey was thoroughly exhausted when the time finally came that night that Penelope fell asleep and the ranch became quiet. She had sent Anna, Pete, Elliot and Jake to town so they could have a few days off after working nonstop while she'd been away. Ance and Irish were playing poker in the den and, so,  Audrey slipped quietly out the back door with a lantern and made her way up the small hill behind the house to the single grave resting beneath a large oak. 

She sat down in the long grass, folding her legs beneath her and stared at the arched stone with Alexander's name carved deep within it. Guilt ripped at Audrey's heart. 

"I found our daughter, Alexander. I trusted a man I shouldn't have trusted and he nearly caused her death--or worse. But she's back now, she's healthy and happy and the man is dead. I learned just before I killed him that he was your murderer." Audrey chewed at her lip as tears gathered in her eyes. "Alexander, I'm so sorry I didn't see it! I invited that man into our home time and again. He sat at our kitchen table and dined with Penelope and I and the entire time it was him who killed you! Him who took you away from us! I should have known.. I should have seen..." 

"If your husband would blame you for that then I'd say he wasn't a very good man," Ance's deep voice was gentle as it floated up behind her. "And since I know what a strong, smart woman you are, I know that Alexander couldn't have been a bad man because you wouldn't have loved him." 

Audrey rose quickly and swiped at her face. "What are you doing out here?!" she demanded, embarrassed to have been caught speaking to her long dead spouse. 

Ance shrugged. "I heard you come out and I was worried. It's dark and, well hell, I'm a bit over protective. Given the short time we've known one another and the hell we've been through, you can't really blame me I don't think." 

"No, I don't guess I can," Audrey admitted. She rubbed at her arms and Ance reached out and grabbed hold of her hand. He pulled her to him and she willingly fell against his chest, breathing in his comforting scent and feeling safe and cherished in his strong embrace. 

Ance sighed and kissed her hair. "You can't blame yourself for what happened, Audrey. Not to Penny and not to her father. Bad people live in this world right along with the good and those bad people, they're relentless and cruel. All that matters now is that you're safe, Penny's safe and Alexander would be happy knowing that." 

"He would have hated you, you know," Audrey laughed lightly. "You would have been Alexander's worst nightmare of a man. He was a very law abiding, right and wrong, black and white kind of man."

Ance chuckled. "Given the way I'm holding you, if I were in his shoes, I'd hate me too." 

"He was a good man, Ance," Audrey whispered. "And so are you." 

Ance's voice was so quiet that Audrey had to strain to make out his words when he replied. "I'm better with you and Penny." 

Audrey's breath caught. Was he saying what it sounded as if he were saying? Did she dare let herself hope that he wanted to stay? "Ance..."

Before she could finish speaking the horses began crying out and kicking up a fuss in the main barn. "What's going on?" Audrey exclaimed. Yipping and growling soon answered her question. 

"Coyotes," Ance growled. "Get to the house, Audrey." 

"I don't think I will," Audrey snapped. "This is my ranch." 

"Yeah and I'm the only one out here with a gun, now get your ass to the house." 

Audrey glared at him but raised up her skirts and ran toward the house. She grabbed her rifle from inside the back door just as gunshots rang out and she heard coyotes crying out in pain. Howls and yips echoed off the plains and began to fade into the distance. 

Penelope began to scream from her room and Irish ran onto the porch. "What's all the fuss about?" he demanded. 

"Coyotes," Audrey replied. She put the rifle in his hands. "Go help Ance. I need to see to Penelope." 

Without waiting for Irish to respond, Audrey ran up the stairs to her daughters room which was just beside the main bedroom. Penelope was sitting up in bed with her kerosene lamp glowing beside her and big tears rolling down her red cheeks. 

"Who's sh..shooting?" she managed to gasp as she drew in deep, stuttering breaths of air between sobs. "Is it more b..bad men who want to k..kill us?" 

Audrey's heart broke for her daughter. She shook her head quickly and climbed into bed, pulling Penelope into her chest. "No, baby girl. It's not bad men. Those bad men are all gone. It's just Ance shooting at some coyotes that were after the horses." 

Penelope sniffed loudly and looked up at Audrey with tearful, brown eyes. "Are you sure?" 

"Yes, I'm sure. I was out there when they showed up." 

"Why were you outside after dark?" Penelope questioned. 

Audrey sighed. "I was talking to your pa's headstone." 

Penelope giggled, the sound thick through her clogged throat. "It's rock, mama. It can't hear you." 

"No, but I like to think he can." 

Penelope was quiet a moment. "I don't remember him, mama." 

"No, I know you don't," Audrey agreed softly, stroking Penelope's hair as she laid down and pulled her daughter against her on the pillow. 

"Ance is like a pa, isn't he? He takes care of me and we have fun together. I love him mama and he loves me." 

Audrey nodded, though she couldn't speak for fear that the tears she was desperately fighting back would fall. She knew that Penelope desperately needed a father. The men that worked on the ranch didn't fill that void. While they certainly cared about Penelope and would help her and protect her if need be, they had no interest in playing with her, talking with her, teaching her or being a friend. 

"Do you think he'd be my pa, mama?" Penelope continued. "He loves you and you love him, I've heard you say it. Couldn't you get married and then he could stay here with us and we could be a family." The excitement in Penelope's tired voice broke Audrey's heart. 

"Penelope, we can't force him to do those things. Ance wasn't looking for a family when we came along and he wasn't looking to have a house and a ranch and be rooted down. He loves us both but some men just aren't cut out to live on ranches. Ance likes the open sky and freedom." 

"Better than he likes us?" Penelope whispered sadly. 

Audrey cursed under her breath. She prayed that Ance wouldn't hurt her daughter by leaving but knew she would never try to force him to stay. A wild stallion was meant to be wild. Tying ropes around him and locking him up would only break his spirit and kill his soul. Audrey wouldn't be the one to do that to Ance. 

"Not better than us, Penelope, and I have no doubt that he'll come see us often, but he's wild and meant to be free--kind of like that baby bunny you tried to rescue last year. Do you remember?" 

Penelope nodded, her eyelids clearly getting heavier than she could manage to keep open. "I sure wish we could turn him into a tamed bunny, mama." 

Audrey couldn't help but smile at the image of Ance as a bunny with a twitching nose, whiskers and furry tail. She kissed her daughter's messy hair and sighed. "Me too, baby girl. Me too."

Audrey lay there in the low lamplight on Penelope's bed for a long while. Penelope was sound asleep and Audrey was beginning to doze when a light knock rapped against the open door. Audrey's eyes opened quickly and she Irish standing in the doorway with the ghost of a smile on his face. "Ansel wanted me to tell ya that the problem is taken care of for tonight. He says there weren't no real damage done to the livestock and for ya to get ya some sleep. He's gonna stay on the porch to make sure the beasts don't come back." 

Audrey could only nod as she fought back the wave of disappointment, nausea and pain that slammed into her. Irish walked away and if he'd said anything else Audrey had no idea. All she could think of was that this was the end. This was it. Ance was distancing himself and soon he would be gone.