That night, Anju sees nothing but Shuka. She's spring after all, bright and golden, an ever-shining star, both on and off stage. They lie together, whispers of dreams and truths and the unspoken, but ever-present ache of love and sorrow between them. They would lie like this in Anju's fantasies, cuddled close and holding tight, never once did she think that those fantasies would come true.

And it was almost like fear, the way longing fills Anju, in how swift it comes. Everything she knew about being an idol screams at her to push Shuka away, to suppress the thoughts currently filling her head, to dismiss the soft, rosey curve of Shuka's lips, to ignore the soothing feeling of the hands rubbing circles into her back.

The air is heavy and in her struggle Anju feels as if she might drown, drown in Shuka's sheer being. And when their eyes meet, there is a moment where it's just the two of them; all of the anxieties melt away, the unimportant fades and, in that moment, Anju decides to be selfish.

It's a clumsy kiss - neither of them quite knew how. They've read the stories, seen the films and they try their best to copy, but the films didn't make every nerve in her body tingle and her hands shake as she tries brushing Shuka's hair out of her face. This was scarier than the films, better than the films. Shuka moans in the space between their lips as they pull back. "Anju." Her whisper echoing in the air like the ending note to a symphony as they both come to the sudden realization of what they had just done. Where do they go from here? What if the others find out? This is it. It's over. Anju's chance to be idol gone because she couldn't control herself. Stupid! And what about Shuka? Taking advantage of the the younger girl like that, Anju is ashamed, she didn't even take Shuka's own feelings into consideration. How could she be so impulsive? Ruining something so good, Shuka is never going t-

All these thoughts come to a screeching halt when Anju is met with the intense force of dilated eyes, so wide and so deep she feels her own stomach churn. She suddenly realizes how close the two of them are and the soft way Shuka's foot strokes her calf as their legs intermingle together.

"Was that okay?" Anju asks, quietly, almost begging. And Shuka knows that she should say 'no', for both of their sakes but she finds herself nodding and leaning in again. She wants to kiss Anju, she wants to kiss her so bad. It's like Anju's a magnetic field, pulling Shuka closer with every passing moment.

"We can't tell anyone else about this." But Anju can't imagine how this could possibly be secret, not with her chest pounding so loudly and her heart feeling set to burst. How could anyone not see 'this' with a glance? But Shuka just smiles and laughs, her face like the sun. She gently nudges their noses together and repeats, "Anju." 

She kisses her. Again, it's uncoordinated and clumsy but Anju feels free in a way she can't find the words to express.  All the doubts grow dull and when Shuka begins to suck on her lower lip, Anju makes a noise she didn't even know she could produce and her brain all but shuts off. She feels as if she's drowning in Shuka, for the second time. No, that's not it. It's different this time, stronger. 

She floating. Shuka's making her feel so feather light and warm and Anju doesn't want it to stop. Shuka's hands are rubbing up her sides and Anju's hands are brushing through Shuka's hair. There is an unmistakable warmth growing in Anju's stomach that's becoming increasingly hard to ignore and-

"-Wait," Shuka pulls back, catching Anju off guard and making her feel slightly disappointed for a reason she doesn't want to admit to herself. "I like you." 

Anju scrunches her eyebrows together, tilts her head (in an endearingly cute way) and bites her, now swollen, bottom lip. Noticing her confusion, Shuka tries her best to clarify, words tumbling out of her mouth, "It's just that, we never actually said it, you just kinda kissed me-"

"Oh, Sorry!"

"No, no, no! It's fine. I wanted to tell you that. . ." Shuka moves closer, takes a moment and with eyes looking up at her like saucers she whispers, "I like you." All the while, smiling one of those megawatt smiles that never fails to makes Anju's heart skip.    

Anju laughs, blowing air out of her nose. Her lips curl into a smile of her own, "I like you too." 

"Yay!" Shuka proclaims, pumping her fist before wrapping it round Anju's neck. They lie there for a moment, enjoy each other's company. Anju feels herself grow sleepy, safe.

"Were gonna have to have a talk about all of this, aren't we?"

"Yep."

Authors Note!

Ayyyyy look at me back with another kissing fic! Sorry this isn't the long one I was talking about last time, I'm still working on that hehhehe, as you may see, I kinda got distracted

I'm not the biggest fan of anshuka angst cause I don't think they deserve it but I thought I should give it a try. Idols can't date and if Anju and Shuka are in love, that might pose a big problem. This started after reading a tumblr prompt but since took kinda a life of its own ^o^

Aw geez, I don't really know what to write here, uhhhhh, hope you enjoy? And if there are any errors let me know, I'll fix 'em!

Word Count: 827