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when jayson was ten years old, his mom got into a car accident.


she went out one night for a girls night to get away from the family. paramedics say she was found inside of an upside down car, and it was a miracle she survived based off of how intoxicated she was.


miracles don't last forever.


jayson held her hand as she layed there in the hospital bed, his dad and brother out to get a cup of coffee from the cafeteria. when the machine next to him starting beeping and the green line that was once zig zagged went straight, he didn't know what to do.


he didn't know what was going on, either, but he knew it wasn't good.


naturally, he started to cry. then the senses kicked in and he called out and screamed for a nurse to come. for anyone to come.


he never let go of her hand.


jayson was pried away from his mother when nurses came running into the room. it wasn't a pretty sight to see a ten year old being pulled away from his dead mom.


he stood in the hallway, crying as he stared in the window frame. he was alone. there was no one there to comfort him, no one there to tell him everything would be okay. just him.


the death of his mother was the downfall of that family.


jayson never saw his brother much again after that. he often locked himself away in his room, only coming out for food every now and then. jayson could've sworn he hadn't seen him for a full week once.


his dad had teenage girls over in the middle of the night a lot. jayson would sit at his bedroom window that looked down at the front yard and wait for them to come. he would take in their appearances, and used them to create a checklist in his head of what to look for and what not to look for in a girl.


these women...these girls repulsed him. sleeping with his dad, leaving right after he finished. not having a clue the trouble they were doing, but being so stupid and such little whores at the same time.


he would hear his dad moaning at night, and he knew his brother heard it, too. a lot of the times, it caused him to have breakdowns and try to suffocate his head into his pillows and the mattress, hoping the noises would go away.


they never did.


he doesn't talk to his dad as much as he used to. the girls stopped coming over, but jayson never forgot about them. how could he?


his brother left for college when jayson was a sophomore, and he knew then that unless he moved out, he'd be stuck with his dad and the memories of everything.


the father and son were friendly, but they didn't have a normal relationship. not after his mom, or the sex, or his brother moving out. they were just kind of..there.


olivia was his only escape.


he knew he was controlling, and he knew he couldn't help how easily he got turned on. but, at the same time, he was a teenage boy that had been through a lot.


and olivia still loved him through it.


out of everyone he knew, jayson loved olivia most in the world. whether it was because he loved too hard or there was genuinely no one else there for him, he didn't question it. he loved her, and she loved him.


she used to love him.


and that's why, even after they broke up, he wanted...needed her to be the best version of herself she could be.


this didn't include fezco.


jayson showed up at the hostpital the night nate had to go when fezco beat him up. no one knew he was going to be there besides mckay, who had texted him maddy, cassie, liv and him were there. olivia didn't find out until she walked out into the parking lot and saw jayson's truck parked next to mckay's car.


she froze, and maddy grabbed her hand to show any kind of support she could. cassie stood there in her own little world, and mckay looked back at liv.


"you should talk to him." he said.


a.k.a. i'm not giving you a ride home because he's here, so your only option is getting in the fucking truck.


liv climbed into the truck without saying anything. jayson looked at her, but she stared straight ahead.


"you wanna talk?" he asked. she sighed, playing with her nails in her lap and staring at her legs, which were covered in nate's blood.


"no. we broke up. you gave my nudes to nate fucking jacobs. i want you to shut up and take me home so i can clean up after last night." she said.


there was no tone in her voice. there were only words.


the two of them heard mckay start up his car and drive away. they could feel the people in the car next to them staring at the two as they drove off, but neither of them looked over.


they didn't move.


"yeah. i gave your nudes to nate one night, and i fucked up bad. olivia, i am so fucking sorry." he apologized. still, liv didn't look up from her lap.


"take me home." she repeated.


so he did. he put his keys into the ignition, started the truck, and the two were silent the entire way. they ignored the questioning look finnegan gave them as they pulled up to the jackson residence, jayson parking his truck in the driveway.


almost as soon as he did, liv tried to open the door. it was locked.


"wait, wait." jayson said. he wanted to put his hand on liv's shoulder, but instead he hovered it above her, not wanting to scare her.


"let me out." she tried. he ignored her attempts at almost breaking the door handle and pulled his phone out of his pocket, opening up his my eyes only on snapchat.


"i have to show you something." he told her. she stopped trying at the handle and looked over, giving up.


he didn't hand her his phone right away. instead, he gave olivia a look of remorse and pity that scared the shit out of her.


"what is it?" she asked.


"nate sent me this video a little while ago. he figured it'd be best if i showed you and instead of him." jay informed.


don't do it.


"what is it?" liv asked again.


"it's from the night of the carnival. and, liv, i just wanna say again that i am so fucking sorry, but i think it's finally time you see this."


don't. fucking. do it.


"just fucking show me." olivia continued.


hesitantly, jayson handed her the phone.


fuck.


immedietly, olivia started to tear up. her chest felt heavy and she felt like she couldn't hold her head up anymore. she looked up at jayson, looking for any sign that this was fake or that it was one of his twisted games.


"i'm so sorry, olivia." he repeated, shaking his head.


now, jayson hated seeing liv cry. absolutely fucking dreaded it. but he knew the first step in getting her back was to get her to move on.


the video was a girl recording, riding fezco in his bedroom. you could hear both of their moans through the screen, and it made liv feel sick to her stomach.


"this isn't real. i...i was with him the night of the carnival. we...um..." she stammered, trying to hand jay his phone back. he wouldn't take it.


"you were with him all night?" he asked.


she wasn't with him all night, and she felt dizzy as the memories started coming back. she had gone to the carnival with bb because her and fez were in a fight. even though they made up that night, she didn't know what he had done before they met up.


liv knew better than to trust jayson. but, right now when she was emotional, she didn't know what to believe.


"how do you even have this? he wouldn't do that to me." she said. once the video restarted, jay took the phone back from her hands, turned it off and shoved it in his pocket.


"that girl is nate's brother's ex girlfriend. she sent it to his brother, who sent it to nate, who sent it to me." jayson informed.


olivia cried some more. things started to become blurry; half from the tears, and half from how much distress she was in.


"liv, it disgusts me to see you like this and to watch that. let me help you." he pleaded, trying to grab her hands. she pulled them away immedietly and started pulling at the door handle again. when it didn't open, she banged at the window.


"let me out of the fucking truck! let me out!" she yelled.


jayson unlocked the truck, and liv practically fell out of it. she ran up to her front door and unlocked it, slamming it behind her and letting her back slide down as she sobbed.


she was in an empty house with no one but herself there to help her. she sat there for a while, hugging her body at any attempt to comfort herself as best she could.


but she couldn't.


she was cold, sad, and alone.

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