15: First loves

We arrived at Pinkberry and I ordered cake batter and Kendall got plain vanilla, I made fun of him for being so boring.


Of course I was ready to pay, but Kendall beat me to it, handing the clerk his credit card.


"I still can't believe your butt was caught on camera." I laugh.


"I know, I'm still not over it either. Minnesota is wild." He chuckles, shaking his head.


"How did you get the camera guys to delete the footage?"


"I have my ways. And by that I mean, just old school blackmail." He says and I scoff.


"Wow, brownie points go to blondy." I say and he smirks at me.


"Enough about me. How have you been?"


"I've been okay, last night was pretty rough though." I say, pushing some hair behind my ear.


"What happened to your face? Did Jackson do that?" He asks and and I take the spoon out of mouth, swallowing my frozen yogurt slowly.


"Amber, you can tell me. I promise I won't lash out again." He says.


"I was walking back from the pool last night and Jackson was standing outside my apartment. He asked if I knew anything about Gustavo not signing him anymore. I told Gustavo everything that morning so I lied and said I didn't know. He believed me and proceeded to ask me out on a date. I declined and he got mad so uh, he gave me this." I say, pointing to the bruise on my cheek.


He opens his mouth to say something but closes it, instead tracing my cheek.


I whimper and turn my head away from him.


"I'm fine. I just don't want you to see me like this." I say, still with my head turned away.


"I don't care if your whole face is fucked up. You'd still manage to look gorgeous." He says and I turn my head back to him.


"You're sweet for trying to make me feel better." I scoff, sniffling.


"No, I really mean what I said." He states.


"Okay, I'll accept that compliment but that doesn't make me any less mad at you still."


"What?! You forgave me and came here with me."


"No, I didn't forgive you. I accepted your apology. And I haven't eaten anything all day."


"Rude." He pouts and I laugh.


"Please forgive me. I'm sorry. I was just afraid of what Jackson'a intentions were."


"But Kendall, what happened between Jackson and I, is my business. And it wasn't your battle to fight."


"But it was. You said you took boxing class for a year to defend yourself, but you didn't even fight back when he smacked you." He states.


"Did it ever occur to you that maybe he was my first love and I would never hurt him, even if he hurt me?" I ask.


"Was Jo your first love?"


"This isn't about Jo-"


"Kendall, just answer the question."


"Yeah, she was." He sighs, scratching his head.


"The you should understand how love works." I huff.


"But that's still not an excuse for him to abuse you." He sighs.


"Like I said, it's my problem." I say, standing up and throwing my empty frozen yogurt cup in the garbage.


"I gotta go. I'll see you and the guys tomorrow at the studio." I say, turning on my heels to reach the door.


"Walking away from your problem again, I see." He states and I stop dead in my tracks.


"You're the one to talk. You ran away from your problem for two days! At least I stayed at the Palm Woods." I exclaim, shaking my head as I walk out.


"That's different!" His voice echoes as he speeds infront of me.


"Really? Because I think they're the same thing." I scoff.


"You know what? If you don't want me to care anymore, so be it!" He exclaims.


"Fine. I never asked you to in the first place!" I shout back.


"Good!"


"Good!" I mock him.


"You know, you are such an as-" I'm cut off as he roughly pulls me closer to him and he kisses me.


"You can't keep kissing me just because you're angry." I say, pulling away from him.


"I know. But your kisses keep me sane." He huffs, running his fingers through his hair.


"Look Kendall, whatever this is, it needs to stop. I'm not Jo, so stop thinking I am. We agreed on being friends. You can't just change your mood whenever you feel like it." I huff.


"I know, I know. But it's not just about Jo." He says.


"Then what is then? Tell me what's going on." I huff with a frown.


"Nothing, nothing. You wouldn't understand."


"How do I know if you won't tell me? I'm not a fucking mind reader." I scoff.


"Can we just forget this ever happened, go back to being friends and let me walk you home?" He cringes.


"I'm not agreeing on anything until you tell me what's going on with you." I state, turning on my heels.


I said what I said because I care.

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