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Are you sure you want to unblock the contact "Dickhead"?


Yes.


...


Shouto has created a new chat.


The chat has been renamed to "What The Hell Is Wrong With This Family?".


Fuyumi has been added.


Natsuo has been added.


Keigo has been added.


Izuku has been added.


Katsuki has been added.


...


Are you sure you want to proceed?


Yes.


...


Shouto has deleted the chat.


...


Are you sure you want to block the contact "Dickhead"?


Yes.


...


New Message.


Izuku: Shouto, this has been going on for months now


Izuku: Are you sure you're okay?


Izuku: Even Kacchan's worried about you


Izuku: Shouto???


Shouto: Sorry, Izuku.  I've just had a lot on my mind.


Izuku: I know.  But now that we're on winter break, don't you think we can resolve it with a nice warm cup of hot cocoa?


Shouto: That would be nice


Izuku: Okay!  I'll be at your dorm in a bit!  Love you, Sho <3


Shouto: Love you too, Zu


Izuku: Where's my heart </3


Shouto: Sorry <3


Izuku: Thank youuu <3


New Message.


Fuyumi: Hey Shouto!  I hope you're having a good break!  I just wanted to let you know that on Christmas, Natsuo and I are going to have a get together and we would like to invite you, Midoriya, and Bakugou!  And I promise, it's entirely Endeavor-free!


Shouto: Okay, I'll be there


New Message.


Katsuki: I'm not going to your dumb Christmas party


Katsuki: How many times do I gotta tell you that I'm not a part of your fucking family!?


Shouto: But Fuyumi said it was Endeavor-free


Katsuki: And?  The fuck's that got to do with anything!?


Shouto: It means that it's Endeavor-free and you should come


Katsuki: No, fuck off


Shouto: Yes


Katsuki: No


Shouto: Yes


Katsuki: No


Shouto: Yes


Katsuki: No


Shouto: Yes


Katsuki: No


Shouto: Fuyumi will give you the recipe to the Mapo Tofu


Katsuki: You're fucking annoying


Shouto: Is that a yes?


Read 11:09


Fuyumi has created a new chat.


Micro Penis has been added.


Natsuo has been added.


Keigo has been added.


Izuku has been added.


Katsuki has been added.


Your Mom has been added.


Fuyumi: Here we can discuss what to get Mom for Christmas


Micro Penis: Why would you add mom then 🧍‍♂️


Natsuo: That's not Mom, that's YOUR MOM


Micro Penis: Is that not the same thing


Natsuo: Of course not


Micro Penis: Am I... adopted...?


Natsuo: Yes Shouto, sorry that you had to find out this way.  I know it must be hard


Micro Penis: At least now I know Endeavor's not my biological father


Natsuo: Nah, he just so happens to be your sperm donner


Fuyumi: Natsu, shut up


Natsuo: But he doesn't get the your mom joke 😐


Micro Penis: What the fuck's a your mom joke


Natsuo: Your mom


Micro Penis: WHAT ABOUT HER???


Your Mom: You called???


Natsuo: Omg look it's your mom, say hi


Micro Penis: Hi??


Your Mom: Hey dumbshit ;333


Natsuo: Your mom, be nicer to your son


Your Mom: You gonna pay me?  I could really use a car, after all, my husband seems to not wanna fly me places even though he literally has the luxury to do so


Micro Penis: Is your husband a pilot?


Your Mom: Um yes


Micro Penis: What's his name?


Your Mom: Your Dad


Micro Penis: My dad's your husband?


Your Mom: No, YOUR DAD'S my husband


Micro Penis: YES I UNDERSTAND THAT BUT ENDEAVOR SEEMS TO HAVE A WIFE ALREADY


Your Mom: WHO SAID IT WAS ENDEAVOR???


Micro Penis: NATSUO JUST SAID HE WAS MY DAD


Your Mom: THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING


Micro Penis: YES IT FUCKING DOES


Natsuo: HEY, CAN YOU GUYS KEEP IT DOWN PLEASE 👺👺👺


Micro Penis: BUT WHO THE FUCK IS THIS


Your Mom: I COULD ASK THE SAME THING TO YOU UNDER THE NAME "Micro Penis"


Micro Penis: MY NAME IS SAVED AS MICRO PENIS???


Your Mom: WITH AN ATTITUDE LIKE THAT YOU PROBABLY HAVE ONE TOO


Micro Penis: WHATEVER YOU SAY BABY DICK


Your Mom: CALL ME BABY DICK ONE MORE TIME I FUCKING DARE YOU


Micro Penis: BABY


Micro Penis: DICK


Your Mom: THAT'S IT, ARSON TIME


Keigo: Ladies, calm yourselves.  You're not yourself when you're hungry, have some fried chicken


Natsuo: You're the type of person to eat the kitkat without breaking it, aren't you?


Keigo: What does that have to do with anything????


Natsuo: That explains a lot


Your Mom: oi, Yumi, Micro Penis stinks like the shit I just took, kick him off


Izuku: Don't talk about Micro Penis like that, it's not nice 😤


Micro Penis: Debating whether or not you're joking


Izuku: It's okay Micro Penis, I'll protect you from Your Mom <3


Micro Penis: Oh yeah he definitely knows what he's doing


Izuku: My heart?


Micro Penis: What about your heart


Izuku: Where's my heart >:(


Micro Penis: As always, you're incompetent <3


Izuku: Better <3


Your Mom: Oi, Micro Penis, stop flirting with the broccoli, he has two boyfriends already


Katsuki has silenced the chat.


Micro Penis: But I am his boyfriend


Your Mom: Damn how many dicks are you getting, broccoli boy?


Izuku: One?


Your Mom: Sure you are


Izuku: ????


Your Mom: But why would you chose Micro Penis over here?  Isn't Shouto bad enough?


Izuku: ????????????


Micro Penis: Says baby dick


Micro Penis: How'd you get a husband anyway you can't even please him


Your Mom: I DON'T HAVE A BABY DICK AND I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT KEIGO IS VERY SATISFIED WITH ME IN BED


Micro Penis: AND YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH THE NUMBER 2 HERO???


Your Mom: NO I JUST SAID HE'S MY HUSBAND


Natsuo: Oh, so they are that stupid


Fuyumi: At this point, I'm not even surprised


Micro Penis: WHY WOULD HE HAVE TWO HUSBANDS??


Your Mom: FIRST OF ALL, UZUI HAS THREE WIVES SO WHY NOT


Micro Penis: It's a CLAN PRACTICE


Your Mom: SECOND OF ALL WHO IS THIS OTHER HUSBAND


Micro Penis: MY BITCH OF A BROTHER TOUYA TODOROKI


Your Mom: I KNOW BUT WHO ELSE??


Micro Penis: I JUST SAID WHO ELSE


Your Mom: NO YOU DIDN'T


Micro Penis: YES I DID


Natsuo: OMG Y'ALL ARE FUCKING STUPID


Natsuo: 



Natsuo:



Micro Penis: I don't get it


Your Mom: 



Fuyumi: Yeah I quit


Miro Penis: Also why am I labeled as Micro Penis I clearly don't have one


Your Mom: HAHAHAHAH LOSER


Your Mom: 



Micro Penis:



Katsuki has unmuted the chat.


Katsuki: Fucking dumbasses


Katsuki: I'm only doing this for the Tofu recipe


Katsuki has changed Micro Penis's name to Shouto.


Katsuki has changed Your Mom's name to Touya.


Touya: Ah that explains why he has a Micro Penis


Shouto: I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND THE MEANING BEHIND YOUR MOM


Touya: Well maybe if you had a fat cock like me you'd understand


Shouto: Well maybe if you weren't a fucking dickhead then maybe you'd actually have a fat cock like you say you do


Touya: You don't have the authority to be talking about MY cock


Shouto: AND YOU'RE NOT AUTHORIZED TO TALK TO ME


Touya: WELL FINE THEN I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU ANYWAY


Shouto: ME NEITHER


Fuyumi: Hey!  You're gonna talk to each other whether you like it or not!


Shouto: Um no...?


Fuyumi: Um YES


Touya: Wait hold on


Touya: Don't tell me that this bitch was invited to that dumb Christmas party too


Fuyumi: Of course he was, he's a Todoroki too


Touya: Well, I'm no longer going


Shouto: I also will no longer attend


Fuyumi: You both are going whether you like it or not.


Touya: Oh yeah?  But I'm older and I say no


Fuyumi: Well you've been gone from the house for 10 years, so by default you get no authority over me


Touya: Says who?


Fuyumi: Your mom


Natsuo: AYOOO SHE MADE A YOUR MOM JOKE


Natsuo: GIVE ME UP FIVE FOR THAT ONE


Fuyumi: 



Natsuo: Yumi actually complied 😭


Fuyumi: Yeah because you're not being a pain in the ass today


Natsuo: Yes bc I'd never be a pain in the ass to Yumi 😌


Fuyumi: The keyword was today


Natsuo: Oh


Natsuo: Anyway


Natsuo: I think you both should go, I mean you guys used to get a long


Shouto: That was before baby dick ruined it


Touya: We'll maybe if you weren't born we wouldn't be having this problem 😤


Shouto: Well I wouldn't have been born if you weren't a failure


Touya: 😃


Natsuo: That's taking it way too far, Shouto


Touya: You look like a fucking clown right now


Shouto: Alright Mr. "My body can't even handle my own quirk"


Natsuo: Dude stop gassing on him


Shouto: If he didn't want to be gassed then maybe he shouldn't have come back.  I'm tired of listening to his stupid ass words and anything for that manner.  Just get him away from me, I don't need him in my life, so stop trying.


Izuku: Shouto... I know you don't mean that.  You spent months thinking about Touya, and you always looked sad when he was brought up.  Hell, we even had a little "Cocoa Time With Zu" to talk about it


Touya: Ayo the fuck is "Cocoa Time With Zu"??? 🤨


Shouto: 😐


Izuku: 😐


Touya: Yk what forget I asked 😐


Izuku: Well anyway, we sat down and talked it over.  I don't understand, what's with the change of heart?


Shouto: I can't fucking stand him.  And yet... I miss him.


Shouto: And it's fucking painful.


Touya: Well then fucking show it bc I definitely don't feel missed


Shouto: Would you rather me put up a fucking poster that says "I MISS YOU SO MUCH TOUYA ILY 😩😩😩"


Touya: Well yeah


Shouto: Yeah no


Touya: Fuck you


Shouto: Fuck you too


Keigo: Hey, don't you have something to say too?


Touya: Me?  No


Touya: I never do


Shouto: That's coming from the man who managed to always find something to say


Touya: SHUT your bitch ass UP


Keigo: So you weren't crying everyday after the whole drama, right??


Touya: Who let you expose me 🧍‍♀️


Keigo: Your husband???


Touya: Oh shit that's right 😐


Touya: Shouto I regret ever talking to you 🙄


Keigo: Touya that's not what we agreed on


Touya: Yes it was


Keigo: Fine, I guess I'm focusing on nothing but Yakitori for 2 months


Touya: Not even my Yakitori???


Keigo: Nope, just me and my big juicy Yakitori


Touya: Oh god I think I'm falling in love all over again


Shouto: Y'all are nasty 😐


Touya: Alright "Cocoa Time With Zu" 🙄


Shouto: You keep our Cocoa time out of this


Touya: Yeah sure whatever you want


Touya: Anyway, Shouto I regret ever talking to you in such a rude manner, and I would like to apologize for my actions 


Shouto: Why does that sound way too formal for either of you


Touya: We thought you liked formalities


Shouto: It doesn't sound like you


Touya: ugh fine I fucking miss you, just fucking talk to me you dumb shit


Touya: Bc I DON'T WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAS


Touya: THERE IS JUST ONE TJING I NEED


Touya: I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE PRESENTS UNDERNEATH THE CHRISTMAS TREE 


Touya: I JUST WANT YOU FOR MY OWN


Touya: MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW


Touya: MAKE MY WISH COME TRUE


Touya: ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOUUUUU


Natsuo: Ayo 🤨


Shouto: 🙄 obnoxious as ever


Shouto: But I'll take it


Touya: Does this mean you forgive me 🥺


Shouto: No.  But I will talk to you normally


Touya: Damn Ig I should take what I can get


The chat has been renamed to "What The Hell Is Wrong With This Family?"


Touya: I love you guys


Shouto: I love Izuku


Natsuo: I love your Mom 😏


Touya: AYO 🤨📸


Natsuo: Anyway I'll see you guys at the Christmas party!  Thank you for actually talking about it


Fuyumi: Yes, and I couldn't have done it without you, Natsuo, or Katsuki, or Izuku, or Keigo.


Fuyumi: We may not be healed completely, but you guys make the family feel whole


Fuyumi: Merry Christmas


Izuku: Merry Christmas, Fuyumi!


Katsuki: I'm still only going for the Tofu


Izuku: Liar~


Katsuki: SHUT UP


And so, the Todoroki family enjoyed their festivities, and made the most of the season.


They snuggled by the fire and drank loads of hot cocoa, all the while watching the Jim Carey and his performance of the Grinch.


Touya and Shouto got along more than ever, and oh dear, who pushed them under the mistletoe??


I can't rhyme, so why try?  But hell, did they have fun.


Merry Christmas to all, and bid the Todoroki Family a long farewell.


THE END.

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