I woke up to the sound of my alarm ringing. Today wasthe day, the final day of practice before our first performance as a group. We have been working tirelessly all week to perfect our routine, and it all comes down to this.

As I get ready, I can feel the nerves building up inside of me. I take a deep breath and remind myself that I have been through this before. I can handle it. I put on my makeup and head to the practice room.

When I arrive, the rest of the group is already there. Billie and Keita are goofing around, making everyone laugh. Bongcha is looking serious, probably trying to intimidate us all. Hanbin and Zhang Hao are deep in conversation, as usual. And Nina is off to the side, looking like she would rather be anywhere else.

The practice goes well, but there are still some small mistakes that we need to fix. We spend hours going over the routine, trying to make it perfect. The pressure is intense, but we all push through it.

I decided to take charge and give my fellow trainees a pep talk.

"Guys, I know we're all feeling the pressure right now," I began, looking at each of them in turn. "But we've got this. We've trained hard and we're ready for this. We're a team and we're going to support each other out there. Let's go out and show the judges what we're made of!"

Keita and Billie immediately started cheering, while Bongcha rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath. Hanbin and Zhang Hao gave me nods of agreement, and Nina looked at me with a small smile.

"I agree with Lux," Keita said, grinning. "We've got this in the bag. And if we mess up, we'll just laugh it off and keep going, right Billie?"

"Right!" Billie exclaimed, throwing her arms around Keita. "We're the comedic duo, remember? We can make anything funny!"

Bongcha scoffed. "Don't count on me to bail you out if you mess up," she said, crossing her arms. "I'm not here to make friends. I'm here to win."

I sighed inwardly, knowing that Bongcha's tough exterior was just a cover for her own insecurities. I decided to let it go and focus on the positive energy from Keita and Billie.

"I'm just glad we have each other," I said, smiling at everyone. "No matter what happens, we're a team. And we're going to do our best out there."

The rest of the practice went smoothly, and we all felt more confident after our pep talk

Finally, it's time for our first performance together in front of the judges. The studio was packed, with hundreds of people watching us. The lights were blinding, and I could feel the sweat on my palms.

We took our positions, and the music started. It feels like everything is happening in slow motion as we go through the routine. The audience is cheering, and I can see the judges nodding in approval.

As we finish, I feel a huge sense of relief wash over me. We did it. We made it through our first performance as a group.

But then I remember something. This is also my first performance in three years since my scandal. I try to push the thought out of my mind and focus on the group's success. But then I see Hui, my ex-boyfriend, in the waiting area. He would be performing next. He's staring at me intently, and I can feel my heart racing.

After the performance, we all gather backstage. The group is buzzing with excitement, and everyone is hugging and high-fiving each other. But I can't shake the feeling of Hui's eyes on me.

As we are getting ready to leave, I feel a hand on my shoulder. It's Kooyoung, our dance trainer. He looks at me with a soft expression and says, "You were amazing today, Lux. I'm so proud of you." I can feel my cheeks flush, and I try to hide my smile.

But then I see Hui again, and the moment is ruined. I can't stop thinking about him and what he must be thinking of me. Did he see me mess up? Does he think I'm still the same person I was three years ago?

I try to push the thoughts away and focus on the group. We have a long road ahead of us, and I can't let my past get in the way. I take a deep breath and remind myself I am here for a reason. I am here to prove to everyone that I am not the same person I was three years ago.

As we leave the studio, I feel a sense of accomplishment. We did it. We made it through our first performance together as a group. And despite everything, I am grateful to be a part of it.