"Now there's something you need to know first." Saber began as she slotted in the recording crystal in her hand.

"Demigods. Demigods for your information, are the children of gods with mortals. These children of the gods have extraordinary abilities inherited from their godly parent, and are often tasked on quests of epic proportions" King explained.

"At least according to the guys."

"So they're like huntsmen but more godly?" Ruby asked.

"Sorta. Of course, the demigods of the modern day no longer go on quests of epic proportions... Until recently at least... But you're not here to hear about that." Saber said with a bit of thought.

"Well that's boring." Nora groaned.

"So what exactly will we be watching from them." Winter asked.

"You might think this will be boring, Nora. But trust me, these demigods are anything but boring. Shall we?" Saber said with a glint in her eyes.

Then the screen came to life...

"Come on, grab some ambrosia and let the nectar flow." A hand passes a cup to the other, as the camera pans to reveal Cinder and Ruby wearing CHB t-shirts.

"Why are they scrapping part of their plate into the fire?" Jaune raised an eyebrow.

"Wait for it." Saber waved him off.

"Why is is everybody scrapping part of their plate into the fire?" Ruby asked, as she watched another camper do it.

"Offering to the gods. Its not enough that they're omnipotent, they have to feel appreciated." Cinder answered, rolling her eyes.

"Ooohh..." Jaune said sheepishly.

"Come to think of it, wasn't there supposed to be a quiz about Remnant's old religions?" Weiss suddenly said.

"Wait what!?" Every student suddenly snapped their heads.

"Can't we just ask Saber that? Maybe she knows stuff if we give her an offering." Ruby whispered.

"Unfortunately, I don't take burnt beef. As a goddess, I only accept offerings in cash. Much more efficient." Saber said offhandedly with a smirk.

"I can't believe your selling some weird ripoff of indulgence, right now..." King muttered.

Cinder stands up in the middle of the dining pavilion amidst all the other campers.

"To the gods!" She said raising her cup in the air.

"To the gods!" Everyone cheered, as the music started playing.

Cinder then began to sing...

Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the,
Universe

"Yikes..." Qrow cringed realizing where this is going.

Soon the others began joining Cinder...

Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the, Universe

Cinder turned to Ruby, before continuing to sing

My dad is Hermes, he messengers things
You'll know his sign by those shoes with those wings

I'd wait by the phone

A flashback of a young Cinder huddled up against a closet is shown as she looked towards the silhouette of a woman.

But the phone never rings

Cinder felt something crawl up her spine, as she tried discreetly claw on her neck.

"Cinder, you okay?" Emerald looked up to her.

"I'm.... Fine..." Cinder replied coldly as she steeled her gaze back to the screen.

Oh noo

Cinder clenched her teeth, as echoes of agreement were heard across the pavilion.

"What did I say? Never boring..." Saber said.

"Horribly depressing at times... But never boring." King agreed.

"To neglect your own children... And I thought gods were supposed to be above it all, I suppose they are... Just not in the right ways." Qrow said with distaste.

When your dad's a god life can be tough

Cinder smiled reassuringly at Ruby.

I met the guy once

Cinder is shown clenching her bleeding eye

"Poor kid..." Summer muttered sadly.

"And she's one of the luckier ones too." Saber remarked.

"What part of eye scar is lucky to you!?" Jaune asked in disbelief.

"One that gets you killed at the ripe old age of twelve." Saber responded coldly.

And once was enough

"Weiss!" Cinder suddenly called out to the white haired girl sitting quietly who looks up.

My mom's Athena, she's smart and she's wise
She's sworn off gluten and she's sworn off guys

"That doesn't seem so bad." Weiss said.

"Only cause she's clearly the favorite..." King muttered to himself.

"Going off Cinder's? It'll get worse." Blake looked up from her book.

"Chill, Blake. No need to be so negative." Yang turned to her partner.

If she came to camp, it'd be a surprise
Oh no

A family photo of Weiss and her parents are shown

Oh, my stepmom she hates me

The woman's eyes were blackened out.

And my dad works all day

Her father disappeard from the photo.

"I stand corrected... And damn if that doesn't feel familiar." Weiss muttered feeling a bit of deja vu.

"Weiss. Did you feel that way too?" Willow asked her daughter softly.

"Why do you suddenly care?" Weiss looked at her mother coldly.

"Because I'm your mother. And I'd like to know..." Willow whisper-yelled.

"You certainly act like it..." Weiss replied with resentment as she turned away.

So I left Virginia

A younger Weiss is them shown alongside Cinder and Pyrrha.

And I ran away...

"Wait. Is that true?" Ruby cut in.

"Ruby!" The Rose-Xiao Long family all yelled incredulously.

"What?" Ruby turned to them.

"You can't just ask people if their depressing personal story is true!" Summer scolded her daughter.

"Everybody!" Cinder called on to everyone.

Oh things couldn't be worse when your parents run the,
Universe

Oh things couldn't be worse when your folks run the,
Universe

"Alright who's next?" Cinder asked.

"Oh, okay let me see." Velvet stood up.

My mom's Demeter goddess of grain
She gets excited when it starts to rain

Velvet is then shown sitting on the ground as vines continued growing around her

But planting and planting and planting's a pain
Oh no
Oh no

"Right?" She looked at the pavilion.

For their sixteenth birthday my friends got a car
I got a fern in some dumb mason jar

"That sounds very helpful and not depressing for once..." Yang said suspiciously.

"Well in this song. You're absolutely right, until you learn this crucial fact about Demeter." King smirked.

"Demeter is a massive helicopter parent, and gives zero shit about the interests of her children... Best example is how she refuses to let plants grow whenever her MARRIED daughter the goddess Persephone is spending time with her husband and not with her." Saber said.

"So with that context, Velvet is essentially saying that she hates her mom for not giving a shit about her interest." Coco asked.

"Oh, my turn!" Yang stood up excitedly.

"Did I ever explain what satyr's are? Just incase that Yang isn't a goat faunus but a satyr. They are mythical creatures tasked with finding and guiding demigods to camp, and they are deeply connected to animals and nature." Saber said in a brief overview of the satyr.

"Cool... Dude, you're a goatman." Neptune awed.

I'm a child of Pan, god of the wild
For those who love nature they're often beguiled
He's not really my dad
But I'm sorta his child
Oh no

Oh no
He went for a hike to explore new frontiers

The image of an older satyr is seen looking back

And no one has seen him in thousands of years

Yang began bawling his eyes out as Ruby comforted him.

"Maybe I am a demigod... And mom's a goddess" Yang said in fake flattery.

"Thank you?" Raven said confused as fuk.

"I don't think that was a compliment Rae..." Summer sighed.

Oh things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the,
Universe

Oh things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the,
Universe

"Ozpin! Who's your dad?" Ruby asked from her seat, making the campers look at him expectantly.

"Is that really important?" Ozpin asked.

"Come to think of it, you never did introduce me to your parents after life no.100, Ozma..." Salem raised an eyebrow.

"You keep trying to murder them!" Ozpin whispered/yelled.

"Not my fault their reactions tend to be AHHHH or kill it with fiyahh." Salem air quoted.

"My father is Kronos." Ozpin answered awkwardly to the expectant campers.

"Remember my lecture. He ate his children." Ozpin sang off key.

"Ozpin wins!" Mercury oofed.

"Lesson time. So, fun fact, Ozpin here is actually the half-sibling of the six elder gods: Hestia, Demeter, Hera, Hades, Poseidon, and Zeus. So, his lesson pertains to the time when Kronos ate six- well, five of his children aka his half-siblings to avoid getting overthrown." Saber expanded upon the topic.

"Also Ozpin's the centaur of disease control and trainer of heroes. The most famous of which is Heracles or Hercules." King added.

"That universe is wild..." Tai said after processing all that.

"I know right... And that's just the start. Heck, I'd go further but even I don't want to tackle the genetics side of this clusterfuck of a family." Saber shivered.

"Ozpin wins!" Cinder blurted out to change the topic. When the rest of the pavilion nodded at the statement.

"What about you Coco?" Cinder continued, looking over at Coco.

Tossing her hair back, Coco began to sing

The goddess of love, my mom's Aphrodite
She tries to be cool

Coco rolled her eyes

but mainly she's flighty
I bring home a boy

The image changes, showing Coco with her boyfriend

And she's there in her nightie

The scene changes to an exasperated Coco looking at her mother

Oh no!

"Oh no, indeed..." Weiss blushed.

"That... I did not need to see that." Pyrrha muttered.

"Its so embarrassing guys!" Coco whined, flustered.

I've tried to seek help, from even the fates
But she steals my mascara
And all of my dates

"Alright. Ruby, its your turn." Cinder put an arm around Ruby while the other cheered.

"If I tried to sing, it'd probably cause an avalance." Ruby tried to politely refuse.

"We're all friends here, come on give it a shot." Cinder encouraged.

Remembering her mother, Ruby began to sing...

My mom was named Summer
She loved scary movies
And food that was blue
And-

"That's adorable." Summer gushed.

"Blue food?" Weiss turned to Saber.

"Right. So Summer's ex-douchebag said something assholey about blue food, so Summer goes out of her way to make everything blue cause fuck that guy." Saber said simply and concisely.

"He's doing it wrong." Velvet interrupted.

"Yeah. Who's your godly parent?" Coco asked Ruby.

"Oh... I don't know." Ruby answered dejectedly.

"Its alright, a lot of half-bloods don't know their godly parents." Cinder said reassuringly.

"They sound like, right cunts. Is what they are." Velvet glared.

"These kids have led some shitty lives at with their human parents, atleast from Cinder's and snow princess's stories earlier. Then being completely ignored until they're needed, is real kinds of fucked up." Qrow agreed.

"Just give it a try" Cinder urged.

A bit more awkwardly, Ruby tried again...

So my dad is some god
That's great, I guess
Did he not want me?
Or not want the stress

The orphan gang, and Yang seemed to resonate with those words as wordlessly as they expressed it.

Too bad he's the worst
And my life is a mess
Oh, no

The crowd cheers, giving Ruby much more confidence.

I hope he shows even a trace
Cause I've got some choice words
To throw in his face

The crowd goes wild as they began singing along

Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the, Universe

Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the,
Universe

Cinder once again takes center stage leading the song

But I don't care where our parents may be

She raises a toast to everyone

As long as you are here with me

The camera then pans out to the many campers in the dining pavilion

We don't care where our parents may be
As long as you are here with me

As long as

The camera pans to Ozpin, Velvet and Coco

You are here

Then to Weiss, then a grimacing Cinder, and a cheerful Ruby

With me

The camera pans to the night sky as the song finally ends.

••••••

"Not gonna lie, nothing beats a song about trash talking your shitty neglectful and abusive parents." Qrow said.

"Need we say more?" Cinder nodded agreeing with someone else for once.

"Man, that was depressing amd fun at the same time..." Yang said.

"And not boring!" Nora whooped.

"Heck, yeah! Anotha one? Please" King looked to Saber.

"Fine. One more, then we move to a different universe... Though in hindsight, all my explanations earlier could have literally just been this one." Saber agreed, easily.

A/N: Nothing at all onto the next chap!

Next chapter: The Day I got Expelled animatic

Have a nice day/evening/afternoon