[A/N: Just a heads up I'm just cherry picking from my favorite ones]

"Alright, alright. Ladies and gents welcome to the grimdark universe that is Warhammer 40k." Saber said pushing her way to the front of the theater.

"You seem excited, what's it about?" Raven asked, lightly scoffing.

"Welcome to 40k. Where everything is evil and everything sucks so fucking HARD." Saber ignored Raven, while presenting a massive projection of the galaxy.

"Recently I've uncovered the name of the absolute legend that stuck his dick in a suicidal fanatic soldier... Yeah, were gonna watch how the hell that happened." Saber explained, while pulling out a recording crystal.

"Excuse me, but ummm... Ya lost me." Mercury said with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, that relationship seems unhealthy at best and toxic at worst." Winter responded with a frown.

"Right, this recording follows the relationship of upstanding imperial citizen Qrow Branwen and his krieger gf Krieger Female Model 68b #6345." Saber continued,before turning back to her audience.

"Woah, uncle Qrow gets a girlfriend! Awesome." Yang hollered.

"Oh... That's... Nice?" Winter said slowly.

"Believe me Winter, when I say it is." King said to the specialist behind him.

"Right. There's something that you need to understand about Krieg. They are fanatically loyal to the Emperor of Man, and believe that the only way for their planet to find atonement is to sacrifice their lives for the Emperor, and their main contribution to the Imperium is the Death Korps of Krieg Regiments, who like literally everyone on their planet is a clone. The Death Korps give zero fucks about dying if it means atonement, born from the Vitae Wombs these guys were trained to fight and die since birth/creation. Hell they're expected to die like 90% of the time, that its an honor to have a name." Saber lectured to the audience.

"Also for some reason a good portion of them are Jaune's? And like half of said Jaune's probably shoveled a titan to death and won. I could be wrong though." King added.

"I have this for boding feeling that this isn't the last we'll see of this universe." Ozpin said looking at his students.

"Is Pyrrha doing okay?" Sun asked nervously, pointing a red faced Pyrrha having a meltdown and drooling.

"Dear gods, we're losing her to Slaneesh. I knew you shouldn't have mentioned the Jaune clones. Fucking heretic" Saber groaned, mumbling the last part.

"Did she not hear the part where I said half of them probably died trying to shovel a titan?" King said, before slapping the heresy out of Pyrrha.

"Wuh..." Pyrrha asked in a daze, before looking at her team.

"Right. If everyone has been cleansed from chaos... Let's start shall we?" Saber said, watching the screen come to life.

First Mission

I was once set up on a date with a Krieg chick on one of those dating websites. It was pretty weird to say the least. She showed up to my house at exactly seven in full combat gear, lasgun and gasmask included. We went to dinner and she didn't even take her mask off, she just sat there at attention staring at me. 

"Wait a minute... I know that body and hair anywhere." Qrow squinted his eyes at the screen.

"Oh, my gosh! Uncle Qrow is dating Weiss!" Ruby gasped incredulously.

"What? No, you dolt! He's clearly dating my sister!" Weiss facepalms.

"That is the saddest date I have ever seen." Raven snickered at her brother.

"Clearly, if I tried dating the Ice Queen. And a dating site, really? Who do I look like, Tai?" Qrow complained to his sister.

"What's this about a dating site, hmmm? Got anything to share, hun?" Summer smiled, pulling Tai closer by the shoulder.

"Look on the bright side LoveDaddy. Getting killed by your ghost wife, is preferable to getting snu snu'd by fire maiden here." King said giving a swift salute.

I tried to talk to her but she would just nod at everything I say. Eventually our food came and she still didn't take off her mask but when I turned to look away for a second her food disappeared.

"Oh, no. She's one of those creepy vore people isn't she!" Roman screamed in horror.

"Okay... That's some eldritch horror shit right there." Qrow said nopeing away from Winter.

"How dare you, insult my sister like that! She's clearly... Just... Just very weird okay?" Weiss said pushing the huntsman back beside her sister.

We went to a movie after that, she just sat there mask and all. However, I went to go the bathroom halfway through and she followed me out and stood guard outside the men's room. I think I heard her hitting someone who tried to come in but I am not sure. 

"Well I'm never getting the image of your sister neck chopping some random dude outside a restroom. No offense Weiss and Winter." Sun scratched behind his neck.

"Relationship goals, right there." Raven laughed mockingly at her brother.

After the movie I decided to go home and on the car ride back tried to talk to her again and all she would do is nod. Before I went back inside my house we saluted each other, which frankly I have never done on a date in my life.

"Well atleast this one doesn't propose to use electric shocks to modify my 'behavior'." Qrow rolled his eyes.

"Well you clearly need it. And my stance is firm on the matter." Winter scoffed.

"Yeah, now I remember why I don't visit him often." Raven mumbled.

"That's some heresy, right there." Saber snickered at the duo.

"Ugghh... Affection. Gross." Mercury groaned at the specialist-huntsman duo.

It gets even more strange. The next day after work I came home and found her standing in my living room. 

"You're under arrest for heresy, you degenerate." King says accusingly.

"Gods, I hate making references when you all don't understand them..." Saber groans internally.

We saluted again. Apparently she had decided to move in as she had a backpack and duffel bag with her.

"Apparently? This Qrow must be really good with charades if he's guessing." Raven raised an eyebrow at her brother.

"She's bloody commandeering my house!" Qrow said offended at the notion of Winter moving in.

"Do you really hate living with Winter Schnee so much?" Summer looked at her teammate.

"Yes. Yes, I would hate to have Winter Schnee living in my home Summer." Qrow said as straightforward as possible.

"And, there's nothing I can agree more!" Winter hastily nodded after Qrow.

"Ya know, if their trying to convince us all that their absolutely no sexual tension between them... They are doing a very successful job at it." Taiyang whispered sarcastically to the other two members of team STRQ.

She sleeps in my bed but she just lies there rigid with her lasgun at her side, I am never sure she is asleep anyways. She always gives me rations to take with me to work and has rations ready for me at exactly six o'clock every evening. Of course, I am also pretty sure that she was the one who dug the trench around my house while I was at work this week.

I am not sure if I have a live-in girlfriend or a live-in soldier. Maybe both.

Introducing the CO

"Well that's ominous. Please tell me its not Jimmy." Qrow frowned silently begging.

"Relax. Dude, its not Irondaddy... Yet." Saber said with a laugh.

Taking Krieger Female Model 68b #6345 to meet my mom was a bit stressful. First off, I am not sure that she even really understands what a "mom" is and secondly, explaining her to my mom was going to be difficult. 

"Oh, no... No. No. No. Oh fuck its mom." Qrow panics while looking bat Raven.

"Goodluck with that bro. See ya!" Raven saluted, before transforming into a bird and flying away.

"HAHA. NOPE." King says proofing a bird cage at the last minute of Raven's path.

"What's so bad about grandma?" Yang raised an eyebrow at her mom snd uncle.

"You'll see..."

"Squak..."

I have tried to explain to her over the phone but I don't think my explanation could fully convey the situation.

When the day came I found Krieger Female Model 68b #6345 dressed in what I assume is formal dress. She had on a pleasantly tight button up black shirt with emblems on the collar and a few medals and ribbons on the right breast, matching black slacks, so-shinny-they-reflected boots, and an open greatcoat made of thinner material than her combat issued one. Of course, she had put on her mask since we were going out.

"I have no words... That's actually a cool outfit." Qrow remarked, eyeing it up and down.

"Okay, here's the deal birdy. I let you out, but you don't run away, 'kay?" King says to Raven in her, well... Raven form.

"SQUAAAK"

"I'll take that as a yes then." King says letting the Raven out her cage.

She had to drive too. I had hurt my ankle the day before, I tripped over some barbed wire that was for some reason surrounding the mailbox. Driving with her is something else. She obeys every traffic law to the letter but somehow is able to accelerate faster than I thought the car could up to the speed limit and she takes corners at full speed unless posted otherwise.

"Its third year all over again, haha... Fun times." Summer laughed remembering their third-year shenanigans.

"No it wasn't... I felt my aura drain in those times, and I ain't going back in a car with you." Raven breathed out in fear while backing away.

"Wuh?" Ruby looked at her uncle.

"Never get in a car with your mom, kid. You'll live longer." Qrow shook his head in response.

We eventually got to my mom's and I was absolutely shocked when she took off her mask. She noticed my shock and pointed at her expressionless face and nodded at me. Facial recognition. I guess she thought my mom must be my CO or something.

"CO? That's one way to put, mom I guess." Raven tensed her shoulder.

"You're mother can't possibly be that bad, Qrow?" Summer looked at her teammate with a disbelieving frown.

"For once, I think I'm gonna side with my sister." Qrow said drinking even faster.

Things did not go well at first. She saluted my mom when they met, stood at attention the entire time, and didn't talk. I would have to say, this is the most awkward time I have ever spent around my mother, but at least it was uneventful.

"Whu? I don't get it? Maybe this version of your mom is just nicer." Tai looked at the twins in confusion.

"That's what they all say... Until its too late." Raven shuddered.

Until, that is, my mom brought up the subject of digging out back in her garden. Upon hearing that I quickly looked around but Krieger Female Model 68b #6345 was already gone. I had visions of trenches and fortifications all throughout my mother's garden. However, when I rushed outside there she was standing at attention with a spade in hand.

"Not gonna lie... Having a live in soldier gf fortify the backyard is absolute genius." Roman remarked thoughtfully.

"Man, mom would have loved having a fortified pot garden... The cash was great, but the impromptu sex parties? Not so much..." Qrow remembered with a shudder.

"Your mom was drug dealer!? What the hell, Qrow? You couldn't have said that from the start!" Tai shouted.

"Well, duh. We thought you all knew anyway, having entered Beacon with no combat school reference and all. Faking transcripts was expensive but easier, brothers know how many actually faked their transcripts." Qrow answered exasperated.

"Yeah, its not like we were Summer who only had to do googly eyes at a weapon store where Ozpin was at." Raven rolled her eyes at their team leader.

"Nice going, Qrow. You just told everyone in the room that there's a drug farm in fuck knows where, Mistral." King said sarcastically.

 I guess that fortifications at such an important location required direct supervision from the person in command. After explaining to my mom that she wanted to help and that it would be ok she was put to work. She planted everything in that garden and did all the edging in under half an hour, It took me close to eight full hours to do it when I had previously helped my mother a few years ago.

"Yup definitely mom's 'garden' alright." Qrow frowned.

"You have got to hand it to your girlfriend though. Digging and planting in mom's garden took 6 of us to finish in that amount of time." Raven reluctantly complimented.

"Not his girlfriend. But thank you?" Winter raised an eyebrow.

This pleased my mom greatly, but not enough to end her concerns about my relationship with a cloned and heavily indoctrinated female soldier. 

"Right. I forgot about that part." Willow frowned at her daughter onscreen.

"I mean, is there really a difference between there and this Winter though?" Qrow raised an eyebrow at Willow earning him a slap from the specialist.

"I'll have you know, that general Ironwood is like a father to me, and I will not tolerate your disrespect!" Winter pulled Qrow by the collar.

"I should stop this, but not gonna lie its kinda hot seeing Winter all angry and wants to murder Qrow." Saber said waving her hand to separate the two.

"Don't we all?" Summer laughed.

All and all it could have been worse though. Interestingly enough, Krieger Female Model 68b #6345 wasn't exactly sure what to make of our visit, on the way back to the car she gave me, changing her expression for the first time, a slightly concerned look. I suppose she thought that the garden wasn't properly fortified. I told her that she did great and gave her a quick kiss. She shot me back a quick half smile before returning her expression back to its usual blankness.

••••••••••

"Right, I'm gonna have to cut this short since the stupid projector is overheating again." Saber said clutching her hand.

"So break time anyone?" Ruby asked her team.

"No, no break time for y'all yet. It just needs to cool off a bit. The next one is just short anyways so it won't be affected much." Saber responded.

"Cool. But what are we watching next?" Jaune looked at their host.

"Hmm? How should I put this? The Sengoku Jidai." Saber said pulling up her chair and then a recording crystal.

A/N: I cut this short since I was running out of ideas on how they'll react to 40k I might pick this up once I've done more 40k  lore related stuff to help them and me understand a lot better.

Also, YES it is my headcanon that the Branwen twins are scared of their mom because she makes them plant weed and shit then sets it all on fire when the twins are not looking as a form of mental training.

Anyways the next chapter is...

Shogun 2: All Faction Intros

Have a nice day/evening/afternoon.