Kim Jiwon (Liz) (IVE)

| try hard


"jiwon dropped out of school." y/n stops from her tracks as soon as she heard her friend say those words, she walked back to her friend and leaned in, a confused expression on her face. "what?" she asked, more like angrily asked, youngeun backed up, confused. "woah, calm down. i said she dropped out, she's not going to school anymore i guess." youngeun shrugged, youngeun laughed and playfully walked around y/n.


"is someone scared of not seeing jiwon ever again?" youngeun teased, y/n raised her hand and karate chops youngeun's head, earning a dramatic scowl from the other girl. "i was just kidding, look, i just heard it from my friend in the other class, also, she came to school with a blonde hair." youngeun added and started skipping through the road.


y/n follows, her steps small. "really? i didn't see her, did you?" y/n asked, raising one brow up. youngeun faced y/n while walking. "uh, well— i didn't but bahiyyih did, she's in the same class as her with yeseo, she told me about it." youngeun faced back to the road.


"also let's say jiwon kinda told me about it few weeks ago, but i thought she was just joking." youngeun shrugged.


y/n's lips was in a small frown, enough to hide what she was feeling inside, y/n glanced at the vehicles passing by, hoping she'll find something to distract her as she walks with youngeun home.


y/n might never admit it, but every little thoughts of jiwon bothered her, it bothered her how every little thing about jiwon was just so vivid to her mind, her voice, her smile, the dimples on her cheeks, her cat-like eyes, it was funny that she knew everything about jiwon but jiwon barely even remembers her name.


maybe, they know each other's age, they were schoolmates and even in the same year after all, but not being in the same class takes it all.


y/n wanted for jiwon to notice her for once, maybe at least a look on her face, where it's on purpose and not because they just accidentally met eyes.


she hated that it was hard for her, jiwon got her trying hard for something not even possible.


she's so out of y/n's reach, it's so unfair.


sighing, y/n shook her head and just ran ahead of youngeun, surprising the other girl. "hey! y/n come back!" youngeun runs, trying to catch up.


°°°°


y/n plops on the bed, bouncing back a bit before she lets out a deep sigh, her bag thrown under her desk, eyes looking up at the ceiling of her room. multiple band posters, her guitar, her study table, laptop, everything in her room surrounding her feels gone as she laid down on her bed and thinks about her life as a teenager.


if i ask her on a date, take her out somewhere? will she be happy?


will she even say yes?


do i even have the money for that?


probably not.


y/n thought as she rolled down her bed, groaning.


of course she doesn't have anything for that, she's 17... a minor, doesn't have a job, relies on her parents and sometimes get grounded for disobeying curfew hours to hang-out with youngeun.


how would a someone like her take jiwon's attention?


she's probably into drummers or something and y/n plays guitar.


and youngeun plays drums.


so unfair...


y/n sat up on her bed, scratching her nape, still on her wrinkled uniform, she stood up and walked towards her window, taking a peek as she heard a loud voice from outside.


"jiwon you dropped out!" hyunseo, who y/n assumed was one of her friends. jiwon answered but it wasn't audible enough from y/n's distance. "i know but it's still shocking!" six of them walk past y/n's house, having their conversation and not minding their surroundings.


so it's true... dropping out and even the blonde hair, she looks so pretty with it.


y/n hid back to her room and sat, hugging her knees.


there all her hopes and dreams getting blown away like ashes.


°°°°°


"aww, don't be sad y/n, i know you like her and all but giving up is way too early isn't?" youngeun pulled through with her bike as she, y/n and bahiyyih were roaming around the street of their village, y/n rolled her eyes as she kept her pace the same as bahiyyih's.


"i don't know about that youngeun." she replied, her voice low and irritated at the thought of having to pull through at the last moments of her teenage life.


bahiyyih nodded. "i get youngeun's point, though you've only just said you feelings for jiwon yesterday..." bahiyyih butts in, her words softer and more careful than youngeun's, which is understandable.


y/n exhales gently. "well, it's too late... for sure none of you saw me doing any effort to make her like me before right? it's all my fault i was too complacent and always giving it another day." y/n stated, her eyes shifting around the town as they pull through houses.


youngeun stopped that made the two other girls stop too.


"hey jiwon!" youngeun waved, a smile on her face as a familiar face meets them. y/n stiffens on her seat, her hold on the bike tighten up as jiwon's presence graced upon them.


jiwon waved back, smiling at them as she walked across the different direction. "hi youngeun!" jiwon greeted as she walked, her eyes shifted towards bahiyyih and y/n, smiling widely at the pair.


"hi bahiyyih... hi y/n!" she waved, bahiyyih smiled at raised her hand. "hello jiwon!" meanwhile y/n stays frozen, before raising her hand slowly and waving it, unable to speak.


unfortunately, jiwon had already walked past them, with y/n even following her with her eyes as she got lost out of her sight.


"psst, oi y/n!" called youngeun, making y/n turn her head and open her mouth and raise her brows. youngeun laughs while bahiyyih giggled.


"you okay!?" youngeun asked, a mischievous grin on her face. y/n shakes her head, prepping herself in her bike as she looked away and started pedaling, making the other pair laugh.


°°°°°


"my dad told me to buy new strings for his guitar..." youngeun paused her sentence as she parked her bike in front of the shop, followed with y/n who locked hers besides youngeun's bike.


"and of course i don't know anything about guitars more than you do, help me pick the best ones." youngeun continued as they enter inside, with youngeun pushing the door open and greeting the owner's daughter.


"hey rei!" youngeun walked inside with such grace and leaned on the counter, music blasting through the speakers around the shop. the japanese girl turned around and waved her hand. "hi youngeun..." rei's eyes fall upon the figure behind youngeun who was checking out guitars. "and you too y/n, something you guys need?" she asked smiling.


youngeun nodded. "yep, my dad asked me to buy him new strings for his guitar and i took a good friend of mine to help me choose but of course we could use your help too." she stated, looking over the strings in display.


rei nodded back. "ah, here you can check them and then choose a good one base on your preference." rei opened a transparent cabinet before showing the strings. "uhm okay, let me just choose before i ask y/n." youngeun muttered.


meanwhile, y/n watched as youngeun and rei busied themselves with the variety of strings to choose from. y/n stood from the cabinet of displayed picks. "i remember i lost my pick." she muttered, her hands buried on her pockets.


"uhm hi y/n." a familiar voice caught y/n's attention, she turned around to meet a pair of cat round eyes, sparkling under the dim lights of the shop. jiwon stood besides y/n, her hands behind her as she smiled towards the other girl.


y/n's breath hitches, caught up in the moment as her eyes widen meeting the other one.


"h— hey jiwon..." she muttered, her eyes finally back to it's normal size, but the grip she has on her pants was the same. there was a lump in her throat, gulping she tried to manage a small smile, only to see the blonde one express pure surprise on her pretty face.


"o- oh, you remember my name?" asked the blonde girl, a hand on her lips to show a gesture of surprise. jiwon glanced at the door shop before looking back at y/n. "can we talk... outside?" she asked. y/n processed the question for a few seconds, blinking it out, then she managed to nod. "sure."


it was dark already, y/n had not realized since she and youngeun arrived the shop, she stood beside jiwon who was looking down and was fiddling with her fingers, blush on her cheeks evident.


"is there something you want to say?" y/n asked, her voice hesitant as she tilted her head. jiwon looked at her, eyes shifting a bit as she tried to look for words inside her head before she finally spoke. "i was kinda surprised you know my name." jiwon stated, y/n's raised her brows.


of course she does know jiwon, who doesn't?


"i do... i remember your name of course. i am surprised you even know me." y/n chuckled softly as she looked at the parked bike in front of them. jiwon breathes softly. "yeah, of course i know you... i just didn't expect you'd care enough to know me like i do with you, because you barely say my name." jiwon responds, her voice so gentle.


y/n nodded, she's right, she barely says the word jiwon because she's kind of afraid jiwon may not give back the same energy and she's just gonna embarrass herself badly.


but— y/n knows jiwon, y/n thinks of jiwon a lot.


y/n turned her head to jiwon. "sorry if you felt like that, it's probably because i don't want to look like a weirdo when i mention your name and you don't know mine..." y/n scratched her cheeks, feeling her head burn a little bit from the sensation of jiwon's stare.


"but i was surprised when you greeted me yesterday, i wasn't able to greet you properly." y/n added.


"you don't look like a weirdo, at least to me you don't." jiwon smiled and for sure, y/n's face must be tomato red right now. "i like watching you play guitar and enjoy watching you play with youngeun at the field." jiwon continued, humming.


"y— you do?" y/n, like an idiot asked. jiwon nodded, before glancing far away with a small frown on her face. "i'm sad." she whispered. y/n's face turned sour as she watched jiwon's expression. "what's the matter?" she asked.


jiwon sighed deeply, sounding like she wanted to pour the sadness out. "because i'll rarely see you again, after i dropped out of school we're gonna move back to jeju and we'll comeback often here." jiwon stated, her lips in a deep frown while trying to avoid looking at y/n in the eyes.


what?


did y/n hear that right?


how will she tell jiwon when she's away?


"will i see you again?" y/n asked, her voice sounded scared and fragile. jiwon nodded. "yeah... but rarely, i'm scared i won't be able to at least talk to you before we move away." jiwon answered.


there was a bitter taste at the tip of y/n's tongue, unable to accept an indirect defeat.


she's saying goodbye to friends right?


"what a shame... i wanted to get to know you more." jiwon's voice trailed off, regret and sadness dripping in her tone like a poison.


"i— jiwon... i feel the same." y/n stuttered, a sharp pang stings her in her chest, suddenly she didn't know if she could breathe.


jiwon looked at y/n, a small dot of light inside her pupils, a reflection of y/n inside the doe eyes as the lights from the shop illuminated the two of them. "i like you y/n and it's more than just wanting to be your friend, it's ridiculous but it's hard to pretend and hide it at this point." jiwon breathes out, her heart thumping loud inside her chest, the beat banging inside her ears like a non-stop rhythm of drums.


y/n's heart sank, unknown to what she's suppose to feel, feeling like the ground is about to eat her anytime soon. jiwon faced away, her face red and tears started to fall from her eyes.


"such a wrong timing too." she muttered.


everything flashes before y/n's eyes, as she inhales and exhales all the feelings out and pushed burdens to the back of her head, her hands falling in jiwon's shoulders, gripping it firmly.


sobs filled her ears, unable to speak.

until her breath hitched as she open her mouth.


"jiwon... please don't cry." y/n bites her lip, seeing as jiwon stopped wiping the tears in her eyes.


"i feel so ashamed, i don't know y/n. please tell me what you feel." jiwon sobbed, looking down. y/n blinks, smiling at jiwon. "don't cry jiwon, i feel the same as you do so don't worry now okay? you're the only girl i love, i'm happy to know that's what you feel, we'll see each other again right?" y/n reassured the blonde girl.


sobs soon died down as jiwon leans in on y/n's shoulder and embraced the other girl, finding comfort in the warmth of her body.


"i think i'm falling deeper, before we leave i want to be with you." she muttered in the fabrics of y/n's clothes.


y/n nodded. "i'll be here with you."

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