Love

"Sir Squire?"

Hearing his name, Kirin looked up, his tired eyes meeting Lord Hallerd's. When he saw the man's confused look, he hurried to give him a reassuring smile as he quietly slid the door to Ariella's room closed.

"We stayed up for quite some time discussing our plans for after the wedding ceremony. She fell asleep a few moments before you returned so I made sure she was settled in her room before returning to my own. Of course, as a gentleman, I did not remove any of her garments, though they may be wrinkled come morning."

The man stared at him for another moment before shrugging his shoulders and giving a large yawn. "That was very kind of you, Sir Squire. I believe I will depart to my own chambers. We must be up early to prepare for the wedding. It shall take place around nine."

Kirin gave the man a slow nod and bid him a good night before turning and retreating back to his own room. Not a moment after having closed the door, he yanked his clothing off and walked over to the wash basin and dipped one of the cloths beside it into the cool water, then calmly cleaned his heated skin. He had been very lucky. Not five minutes before Lord Hallerd returned, he had been in bed with a sleeping Abel cuddled in his arms. He had made sure that he redressed once they had finished making love, just in case the young man's heavy eyelids failed to keep him awake much longer and Kirin needed to carry him to his room.

Very lucky.

His mouth ticked up at the edges as he finally fell back into his bed with only a light undergarment on. Staring up at the ceiling, Kirin allowed his mind to drift. He was nervous for the marriage ceremony, but not in the way he had expected.

You are so worried about him declining to marry you that you are going to ruin your plan, even with its simplicity, he thought as he shook his head against the thick pillow beneath it. He heaved a tired sigh, which was quickly followed by a yawn. As Kirin turned onto his side and relaxed his body, he knew that he would never let his plan fail. But if somehow it did, he would not let Abel return to his father. The boy had never been able to live his life until he had been arrested for something he had not done, then almost killed.

I will free him, and I will love him.

He paused in his thoughts for a moment before a tired smile slid onto his lips.

I do love him.



Waking up to the sound of someone walking around had Abel trying to make his heavy eyelids open. "Kirin...?" he whispered quietly against his pillow. The footsteps came closer, but where Abel expected a gentle kiss, he got an abrupt slap. Strong hands then pinned him down to the bed by his neck as his eyes jerked open to see his father leaning over him.

"Do not call him that! Are you trying to ruin our chance to finally get good money?" he snarled in a quiet voice before straightening back to his full height. Abel flinched as he sat up, shaking his head frantically. His cheek stung, but he knew rubbing it would just make the man smirk, so he withheld.

"Good, now get up, wash, then get into your mother's gown and slippers. I expect you downstairs in twenty minutes!"

Before Abel could even respond, his father was walking out of the room, suddenly looking much more gentlemanly than he had moments earlier. Sighing, he slid out of bed and hurried over to the small wash basin sitting on a table in the corner. The water was cold, but it felt good against his warm skin as he stroked a wet cloth along his body after removing the clothing he had accidentally fallen asleep wearing.

Kirin must have returned me to my room, he thought as he washed. A small smile found his lips at the thought of being carried by the man after they had made love. Once he was clean, he used the chamber pot, then hurried into the gorgeous wedding gown his mother had left behind when she had passed away. It had been stored decently well, leaving it nearly just as beautiful as the day it had been put into the box. It did not fit perfectly and there were a few moth holes in it, but then it had been made for his mother. The dress was thankfully long enough to easily cover his breeches and feet after he slipped into the slippers his father had set beside the dress. It also was just large enough so that he did not have to fuss with the still-tied lace interwoven down the back.

After a quick check in the large mirror hanging next to his bed and adjusting his wig, Abel stuffed two stockings into the bodice of the dress, fixing them until he appeared to have breasts. While the clothing was comfortable and the socks didn't bother him, he wished more than anything else to be back in just his breeches, one of Kirin's shirts, and his old boots. He would just be thankful that he could still wear his breeches under the dress.

Just wed Kirin, then you will have your freedom, he reminded himself, adding a quick nod before finally walking from his room. He chanced a look toward Kirin's room, not surprised to see the door open. When he got down the stairs, his father told him, while pulling a veil over Abel's head, that he had sent Kirin ahead to the church.

"There we are. My beautiful daughter, Ariella."

Abel winced behind the veil as the smell of alcohol infiltrated his senses. Of course his father would drink on his wedding day. Well, fake wedding day. Still, he couldn't get the idea out of his mind that Kirin actually planned to sign the papers. They would be official until the magistrate or clergy nullified them. It was taking a huge risk, too, because they might not consider nullifying the marriage if they became aware of the fact that they had been tricked to wed two males. The idea of locking Kirin into a marriage with him for the rest of his life made Abel's stomach upset as he was rushed out the door to the awaiting carriage.

The ride was short, only taking about fifteen minutes before the carriage stopped at the foot of the stairs of the large church in the center of town. Abel's heartbeat sped up dramatically as he stepped from the carriage and allowed his father to lead him up the endless stairs. By the time they arrived at the top, his father was breathless, panting quietly. Ignoring the man, Abel focused his attention inside the church and couldn't help the smile that found his lips at the sight of Kirin. The man had clearly bought a very beautiful frock coat and white trousers and was pacing quite frantically, as if he were nervous. He even went so far as to begin nibbling at his thumbnail.

With a quick glance around the room as they approached, Abel noticed very few people. Just enough of father's friends to verify the marriage in case they needed to ruin Kirin for marrying me and refusing to give my father money to keep quiet. Frustration tried to settle in his belly as the large organ began to play, alerting everyone in the large room to their arrival. Kirin's head whipped around, his shined boots stopping on the deep red carpet as he stared, lips slightly parted and a tinge of pink growing on his cheeks.

Abel's heart responded like a butterfly he had once caught in a jar as a child in their yard. It fluttered relentlessly against his rib cage, wishing to be free. When his father led him farther into the church, then stopped and gestured to Kirin, who was only a few short feet away, holding his hand out to him, Abel calmly strode forward. His hand slipped into the man's palm, then fingers wrapped around it before it was brought to Kirin's lips for a kiss.

"You are absolutely stunning, Ariella."

The compliment felt odd, but Abel hurried to bow his head and follow Kirin as he led him up the dais toward the priest. There they stood, hands clasped as the man began the ceremony. Everything he had been made to do. How he had been trained to perform. It was all coming together. His father's plan would come to fruition and... ruin Kirin.

Stepping forward abruptly, Abel leaned up as Kirin leaned down, brow furrowed.

The priest grunted, frustrated that he had been interrupted, but kept quiet as Abel whispered worriedly into Kirin's ear, "I cannot do this, Kirin. I would not have you ruined for my freedom. I must call off this wedding."

He expected Kirin to agree to a point, or at least look like he understood, but the man's face read as quite the opposite. His eyes darkened a small amount, and his lips pursed.

A moment later and he was leaning in, whispering against his ear, "Your freedom is all I want now. Trust me, please. I will not let you down. Never again."

Abel fidgeted, his fingers tugging at the hem of his beautiful dress as he thought through Kirin's words. He had agreed only the other night to accept whatever Kirin had planned, yet it was hard to see one man risk so much for him and not act. Not try to save him from the ruin he would bring upon himself.

Eventually, he straightened his shoulders and sighed inwardly. "Okay, Kirin. I trust you."

After a brief smile and a gentle squeeze to their still-entwined hands, they took a small step back so that the priest could continue with the ceremony. It felt like forever as Abel stood there, watching the handsome man before him. The man that had taken him from a prisoner to a lover. It baffled him that he would be free soon. Would be able to go wherever he wished in the world, much like he had dreamed many times as a young child, yet as he stared at Kirin, he could only see himself wanting to stand beside him. Be his equal and help the man with everything and anything he wished to accomplish in his future.

I want him to be my future.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife," the priest said as he ducked his head. Kirin wasted no time in stepping forward and gently removing the veil from around his face, then leaning in for a heartwarming kiss. Abel wished to drown in the man's kisses to remove his nervousness, but before even a minute had passed, his father was beside them. Kirin withdrew first, smiling at his father, who held up a quill and gestured to where the official marriage documents were situated on a small table set beside the priest.

Without a second of hesitation, Kirin took the quill and signed his name in the appropriate spot. Because his father's signature was already marked where it needed to be on the paper the previous night, Abel was then handed the quill. He took it with shaky fingers. The paper blurred in his vision as tears threatened, but when he felt a gentle kiss press against his cheek, he looked at Kirin. The man smiled and leaned over to whisper in his ear.

"Sign your name, Abel. The name you want. The one that will be your future, not your past."

Swallowing, Abel stepped forward and leaned over, signing his name in a beautiful cursive. When he had finished, he stepped back and heaved a huge sigh of relief. Kirin tugged him against his chest and stole another kiss, then took his hand and led him out to the carriage. Lord Hallerd was hot on their heels, following them into the carriage once they had both already climbed in. As soon as he sat, the driver whipped the horses into a slow trot.

"Congratulations on your wedding, Sir Squire. I have something I wish to discuss with you before you leave town," Lord Hallerd said with a bitter smile.

Abel's stomach clenched with worry as Kirin relaxed into the uncomfortable wooden bench seat, one arm wrapped around Abel's shoulder. "Yes, Sir Hallerd?" he replied calmly.

Abel's father remained silent for a minute, likely trying to devise how to broach the subject they both already knew was coming. When he finally did begin to speak, Abel could see, through the small smudged window, that they were coming close to some of the local shops in the opposite direction from his father's home, no doubt to buy the man time. Focusing outside, Abel noticed Kirin's horse in the distance, still tied up outside of the garment shop where they had left her.

"I have a feeling that you would like to bring up the question of money in order to keep secret the fact that I have married a man, Lord Hallerd?" Kirin said with a bored tone that Abel couldn't comprehend. He could be ruined in just a few short sentences, yet he was completely calm about the situation!

Looking at his father, Abel could tell that the man was just as surprised as he. His eyes had grown large and sweat beaded against his forehead. "I... y-yes," he stuttered, seemingly at a loss for words.

Oh father. After having planned this for so many years...

"Well, I regret to inform you that I have no interest in saving my title or reputation. What I do have interest in, is the fact that the marriage document we both signed was legal and heading into the church's registrar. It would be a shame if they suddenly became aware of the fact that Ariella's father had concealed his gender for eighteen years, only to marry him off for profit when he had drunk away most of his coin."

A subtle smile warred with the worried frown on Abel's lips as Kirin knocked twice on the side of the carriage, effectively making the driver stop the horses. "Thank you for the ride back to my horse, and for my bride. I will treasure him, as you have not," Kirin said as he jumped from the carriage, then turned and offered his hands up to Abel.

"Come, Abel. Let us go home."

Home. With Kirin.

Abel hurried toward the exit of the carriage but was held back as his father grabbed his arm and forced him to face him.

"You will go nowhere with that man! How dare you go against my wishes! I have raised you since your worthless mother died giving life to you! You disgrace her dress and her memor—" The sound of flesh meeting flesh echoed throughout the small carriage as Abel yanked his left arm free and, at the same time, delivered a firm slap to his father's face with his right hand.

"The only one who dishonors mother is you, Father. And for that matter, I am no longer your daughter. I will never come home. I will never call you father again. I will never think of you again. But I will think of Mother. Of the wonderful stories people have told me of her." He looked down at Kirin, who was smiling up at him with pride in his warm, dark eyes. Abel offered him a stressed smile, then turned back to his father.

"And from this day forward, Ariella Hallerd is buried. I am Abel Squire now, and I will live my life as I see fit." He turned again, this time reaching down to Kirin, allowing the man to carefully lift him from the carriage and set him on his feet. Abel looked up with a determined smile as he settled his hands on Kirin's firm ones where they grasped his waist.

"And I will live it with my wonderful husband far, far away from this place. From these memories." He looked back one more time. His eyes cold as they met his father's. "And away from you."

With that he turned and, after grabbing hold of Kirin's hand firmly, began heading for the garment shop. The sound of the carriage being driven hastily away met his ears a moment later, but he didn't bother looking back as they stepped inside of the shop. Abel hurried to the back where the changing curtain was hung, and stepped behind it. To his surprise, Kirin followed him inside. Their eyes met for one short moment before they began freeing Abel from the dress. When he was out of it, he carefully folded the item as Kirin ducked outside of the curtain to fetch something.

When he returned moments later, Abel couldn't help but feel loved as Kirin knelt in front of him and carefully began sliding the slippers from his feet. They were soon replaced by his worn leather boots. Kirin meticulously tied each one, then rose, his left hand moving to run his fingers from Abel's forehead, backward. The gesture effectively removed the itchy wig, freeing his soft dark hair.

Kirin hurried to twine his fingers in the strands and pull him in for a kiss, whispering against his lips as he did so, "Forgive me for not presenting a gift to you on our wedding day. I do hope returning your first earned possession is alright."

Abel couldn't hold back a small chuckle as he kissed the man, then led him out from behind the curtain, the dress and wig in his hands. Kirin stopped just long enough to retrieve the slippers before they both walked over to the old man standing behind the counter.

"Hello, sir. We would like to sell these items, if you are interested?" Abel questioned, drawing a surprised look from Kirin. The owner of the shop eyed the wig and slippers and nodded, but when his gaze found the wedding dress, his jaw dropped.

"Oh, that is a beauty. Let me see her, boy," he requested, reaching for the garment. Abel handed it over to him, watching as the man unfurled the material and a tear came to his eye.

"By god. I remember this lovely piece. It was my wife's favorite work. She had said that she would never sell it, but when a young woman with such amazing beauty entered the shop, inquiring about a gown... she could not say no. She retrieved the dress in the back where she had kept it since sewing the item, and presented it to the woman. The woman fell in love with it just as much as my Mary had."

Abel looked up at Kirin when he felt a tap on his shoulder. The man leaned down, whispering to him, "Are you sure you wish to sell it? Is it not an important memory of your mother?"

His words were kind, but Abel knew that the dress would have no use to him. He smiled and turned back to the old man who looked at the garment like it was gold, not merely an eighteen-year-old dress with small moth holes in the seams near the bottom.

"How much, young man? Please, I would very much like to buy this item."

Abel glanced up at Kirin again, then shrugged and returned his attention to the shopkeeper. "How about one silver coin for everything? The only value I see in the dress is that my mother wore it before her death, yet it is only a dress. I will never use it, and I would much rather someone who appreciates it so much have it."

The old man's eyes shone with admiration as he hurried to fish out a silver coin and hand it to Abel. "Bless you, son, bless you. I will take very good care of it. She will look like new soon and be displayed proudly in remembrance of my sweet Mary."

With a nod, Abel thanked the man and bid him farewell before he walked outside. Kirin remained for a moment longer, the reason soon apparent as he stepped outside and gently tugged a shirt over Abel's head that fit quite well.

"There we are," he said with a smile before he walked over to his mare, noting that she had fresh grain and hay in a bucket hanging on the hitching post and had been groomed. After removing her reins from the post, he hurriedly swung up into the saddle, then offered Abel a hand.

"Let us finally go home, Abel."

Taking his hand, Abel allowed Kirin to help him swing up into the saddle in front of him. As they began their trip, Kirin leaned over slightly and spoke with a hint of laughter to his words. "Is your backside feeling alright, Abel?"

His words had a grin spreading across Abel's lips as he carefully climbed onto the lawman's leg. "Yes, but perhaps I should just ride upon your leg to keep from causing it anymore harm..."

A deep laugh sounded from Kirin as he wrapped an arm around Abel's middle and hugged him to his chest, pressing a kiss to his soft hair.

"Of course, love. We shall share a marital bed come nightfall. Best to be healed before then, do you not think?"

Abel gave the man a playful glare for his joking words, then kissed his cheek.

"Yes, sir."

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