terrified

Lexie woke up in a cold sweat and crying. She leaves for her board certifications in 3 days. Her nightmares were becoming unbearable. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Mark, Meredith, and her other friends in the crash. The crash hurt everyone. Arizona lost a leg, Derek's hand was broken into many places to count, Christina had severe PTSD. Lexie didn't return to work until 6 months after the crash. She would just sit in her room in Meredith's house and look out the window. It was hard to do anything else. When she went back to work nothing felt right, Derek wasn't operating, Christina was in Minnesota, and Mark was gone. No more snarky jokes, no more plastics posse, no more anything. Lexie was numb.


Then she got the offer from UVA. She packed up her things and was out of Seattle as fast as she could. She had her goodbye with her family and friends. Her father was so sad that she was leaving, he even showed up at the airport demanding she doesn't leave. Lexie told him she was going no matter what he said. She stood her the plane door starting into the cabin for what felt like hours. She knew she had to leave Seattle, but she couldn't leave on a plane. So she collected herself and got off the plane. She picked up her luggage and went to Meredith's house. She broke down on the porch crying about how she couldn't escape. She slept on Mer's couch that night. The next morning she and Meredith left for a 3-day road trip to Virginia.


Now here was she again, having the same nightmare she had every night for a year after the crash. Lexie hadn't had a nightmare in almost 6 months, she was finding her footing again, she was okay again. She had Caroline and Spencer. Now all her process was killed. She has to get on a plane again.


She brought her knees to her chest and tried to calm her breathing. She really didn't want to wake Spencer up. He knew about her nightmares and he wanted to help, but Lexie didn't want her nightmares to be a bother to him. She felt Spencer move under the covers next to her. He slowly opened his eyes and looked up at her, when he realized she was crying his eyes flew open and he quickly sat up.


"Hey, hey you're okay" He looked into her eyes and put his hands on her shoulders. "Deep breath."


She relaxed at his touch. She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. She was shaking so much it moved the bed. Her hair stuck to the tears and sweat on her face. She hated that Spencer had to see her like this. She and Spencer slept at Spencer's apartment every night when Lexie didn't have the night shift and he wasn't away on a case.


Lexie's nightmares have been really bad this week. She had to fly again in two days. The nightmare was always the same. Lexie would watch everyone on the plane would die slowly and Lexie couldn't do anything about it. But this week, the nightmares were the same, but now Spencer was there, and he would die.


"I-I can't Spencer, I can't get on that plane." Lexie sobbed


Spencer's heart swelled. He didn't want Lexie to be so afraid, he really wished he could take this burden from her. He flew on a plane practically once a week, sure the jet had turbulence, but he's never experienced anything even close to what Lexie's gone through.


"Yes, you can Lex. You are so strong, look at the life you've built for yourself here. You're chief resident, you're doing solo surgery, you know everything about medicine." Spencer chuckled. "Dr. Lexie Grey, you can do anything."


"No. I can't get on a plane again. Spencer, I can't do that again." Lexie looked up at Spencer, he could see all the fear and hurt in her eyes.


"It won't happen again, you're safer on a plane than if you are in a car. Only 30 planes crash a year, only about 5% of those crashes are fatal." Spencer brushed her hair off her face. Statics is what Spencer knew best, he didn't know if they were helping, but it's what he knew best. He knew all the statistics about plane crashes, he even knew everything about Lexie's crash. When she told him about the accident he read everything he could about it. 6 doctors went up in a plane, 5 returned, articles were not too hard to find.


"I'll go with you. I'll get on the plane with you." Spencer's face lit up, if he was on the plane with her, maybe she would be able to do it. "The flight's only 5 hours and 4 minutes. I'll be there the whole way." He reached over and grabbed both her hands, looking into her eyes.


"Spencer...I couldn't ask you to do that. The test is hours long. You have work." she sighed. She didn't know if Spencer coming would even help, the thought of being on that plane scared her more than anything ever has.


"I can take two or three days off, as long as I don't have a case, I'll go with you." he looked at her. He would do anything for Lexie. He would go with her, he didn't care about the flight or even having to wait for Lexie to finish the test, he just needed to make sure Lexie took her test.


"Spencer--," Lexie whispered, tears in her eyes


"Lexie. I love you. I can't let you not take this test, I will do anything to make sure you take and pass your boards." Spencer spoke softly, caressing her cheek slowly, wiping tears as they fell from her eyes.


Lexie sighed and pulled herself to Spencer's chest. He kissed her hair and put his chin on her head. They sat in silence for several minutes. Eventually, Spencer pulled them back so their heads laid on the pillows, he pulled a blanket onto their bodies. The two eventually drifted to sleep for the night.


-


The two walked into the huge Ronald Reagan Washington National airport, Spencer knew a lot about the airports in Virginia. This airport was the biggest and had the best stats, he wanted Lexie to feel as safe as possible.


Lexie held tight to Spencer's hand. She was incredibly grateful that he was able to come with her. She wanted to get on the plane, take the test, and fly home. She just wasn't sure if she had it in her to do so. Even with Spencer here she was a mess. She was panicking, what if she couldn't do it? She has to take this test, her whole career relies on it.


They went through security and grabbed coffee. Then it was time to board the plane. When the boarding announcement was made, Lexie froze. She started to panic and shake. Spencer calmly led her to the plane's doors.


"You can do this. I'll be there the whole time." Spencer said holding Lexie's hand tightly.


She nodded in response. They slowly walked onto the plane and took their seats. Spencer at the window and Lexie in the aisle seat. She took deep breaths and tried to focus on Spencer holding her hand rather than the fact that she was on a plane. The plane sat on the landing strip for only ten minutes. When the plane started to move for takeoff, Lexie really started to panic.


"Spencer, I need to get off, I can't do this." She whispered. Tears were rolling down her face and her hands were shaky even more than they already were.


Spencer put his hands on hers. "Lexie. You can do this, and we're already in the air." Spencer's voice was soothing and calm.


His voice did help Lexie a bit, but hearing that they were already in the air made everything worse. There was no going back, she couldn't get off, she was stuck. She tried to keep her breathing normal, but she couldn't.


Spencer took notice of her panic. He gently moved her head to rest on his shoulder. He then wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Keeping his other hand in hers.


"Sleep. It's okay, you're safe," he spoke softly.


Lexie closed her eyes and focused on her breathing. After a few minutes, Lexie was asleep.


-


Lexie was shaken awake by Spencer. She looked around, people were standing and collecting their things. The plane had landed. She did it! Her head shot up to look at Spencer, who had the biggest smile on his face.


"I did it." she breathed. Her smile reached from ear to ear.


"You did it," Spencer responded by gently locking his lips with hers. He pulled away and started gathering their carry-ons. He took Lexie's hand and led her off the plane back into the airport.


They landed in San Diego, the November air was quite a bit warmer than the Virginia air. Spencer liked the cold chill Virginia had, he liked wearing sweaters and long pants. The warmer air threw him off. Virginia had snow on the ground, California had sunshine and shorts.


The two got into their uber and headed to the hotel where the tests were taking place. Lexie had to register herself and make sure everything else was in line. Spencer didn't mind, he could go to their room and make sure everything there was in place. He was so happy Lexie was able to make the flight. Of course, he believed in her, but he wasn't sure if she would run off the plane herself, no matter if Spencer came with her or not.


Lexie came back from registration and fell back-first onto the bed. She couldn't believe she had done it, she flew on a plane again. Spencer came and laid next to her, turning his head to face her.


"I'm so proud of you Lex."


"I couldn't have done any of it without you. You got me on that plane. Thank you." she spoke. She inched closer to Spencer, closing the space between them.


Spencer wrapped his arms around Lexie's back, one hand tangled in her hair. They'd never kissed like this before. So much passion and heat behind their lips. Spencer flipped Lexie so they were both sitting up, Lexie on Spencer's lap. Spence's hand slipped under her shirt, she flinched at his cold hands on her bare skin.


"Lexie?" He asked pulling away. "Do you want to do this?" He asked meaningfully. He didn't want to do anything she didn't want to.


She took one last deep breath before smashing her lips onto his. "Yes," she whispered against his lips. Pulling her shirt off, "I really want this." She said breathlessly. Spencer smirked and started to unbutton his shirt.






a/n: hey guys! thanks for reading! almost 700 reads, that's crazy. don't forget to vote and comment pleas

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