XiaoBai

Death is inevitable whether you're immortal or mortal it will find you, it is said that you feel it when your time to go is near and that it's the most peaceful thing to feel.

I can feel it, I am dying and not even the stopping of time can slow it down but I fear for the love of my life. What kind of life would he live without me? Would he be happy? Would he meet someone new who could love him better than me? Love him better than I do?

Although it's impossible for anyone to love him as much I love him, I would hope that someone would hold his hand on the hardest days of his life.

Knowing that you're dying and feeling that you're dying are two different things,
Knowing that you might die makes you look at your life and all the choices you have made and all the things that you wanted to do, and all the things you did and it makes you wonder whether is this everything you wanted from your life.

Feeling that you are dying makes you want to spend time and cherish the people that you love, telling them everything that you wouldn't say on a normal day, or things that you would keep for only your heart to remember. You look at the through new eyes and as much as it hurts you picture their world without you, it makes you feel closer to them more than anything and even though you feel that you're dying you don't feel afraid.

I have wasted all of my love to Dijiun and I am satisfied with that, I have loved an amazing soul and people will never get to see the beautiful parts of Dijiun, they will never see everything that hurts within him and they will never know that he loves genuinely and intensely. Majestic as he is, he is childish as a toddler there isn't anything that I don't love about him, one thing I have learned about him is that he never sleeps at night he watches over me to keep me safe.

I feel safe when I am with him even when I am in danger I feel safe, just like how safe I feel with falling in love with him. I dedicated my whole life into loving him but at the same time I am going to leave his side, will he ever forgive me for that? Will he feel that I abandoned him? If I die there is no way of coming back I will always be by his side forever, isn't that better than nothing? I am not afraid of dying but I am afraid that he might forget me.

I woke up to the phoenix birds chirping happily but there was no sign of Dijiun, I looked around the Purple Sea but he wasn't there.
I frowned it was unlike him not to say where he went but I hoped that he was okay, after a few seconds Yuka appeared with a gentle smile on his face. "Greetings XiaoJiu." He said softly and I bowed my head and beamed at him. "Where is my husband?" He frowned but then he smoothed his face quickly. " He is in heaven, didn't you say you wanted to get married today?" I beamed at him again and he laughed. "XiaoJiu, I have a favour to ask you." There was a serious tone in his voice and I knew that what he was about to ask me, was something that I wasn't going to be able to keep. "Don't leave him just yet." There was tears in his eyes. "I shouldn't tell you this but he barely slept yesterday he was pacing about the whole night, he is afraid that he will lose you and he may deny it but I know that he can feel that you're dying, if he loses you the pain will swallow him up." I felt a lump rise on my throat, I tried smiling but my smile got stuck on my face. "Don't you think I know that? It will completely destroy but I can no longer fight harder than I have, do you think that I want to leave him? My whole life revolves around him, he is the center core that connects everything within me, he is my gravity, my life source but this time not even he can save me. I would say that erase his memories when I am gone but even I know that would be useless, I am not afraid for myself but I am afraid for him." I whispered softly. "That's why I want to marry him today, I want to give him a forever with whatever days that I have and it would be great if it was enough time for me to give him a child, more than anything I want to have a child for him, our forever started a long time ago but I want to give him a forever that will always have my heart engraved on it." I sighed softly. "Please take care of him for me." Just then my lover appeared, he eyed me and then Yuka. " Why do the both of you look so miserable?" He asked and I ran to him and I put my arms around him. "My love." I felt the tears spill over soaking his robe, he put his arms around me and he held me tightly. "I don't want to leave." I whispered softly. "I don't want you to go and you won't." He whispered softly, I pulled away from him and I looked at him. "What do you mean?" He wiped my tears even though there was tears in his, he released a shuddering breath. "I wouldn't give up on you without trying, there isn't a thing I wouldn't try to keep you alive." He whispered softly and suddenly I felt scared. "What did you do?" I whispered and he smiled. "What I had too." He answered me gently. "Don't ask me about this now, but rather go to Qingqiu and get ready for our wedding." At hearing the words wedding I jumped up happily and I kissed him. "Go, your parents are waiting." I kissed him a little bit longer and then I went to Qingqiu.

It was bustling in Qingqiu especially in the fox cave, even the deities from the Ice realm were here. My mother was chirping happily while she danced with father lovingly. "I would have gotten married sooner if I knew that it would bring you so much joy." I said as I entered the cave, both my parents looked at me lovingly. "XiaoJiu! You're here finally, you need to bath the ceremony is in an hour!" My mother exclaimed happily and without wasting time I went to get ready, suddenly I felt nervous and giddy. My mother came in while I put on my purple and blue phoenix robe. "You look so beautiful!!" She exclaimed happily, I looked at her and I smiled at but suddenly she looked startled. "What's wrong?" I asked softly but she shook her head. " Nothing my sweet child, I wish you all the happiness in the world, I am in awe and impressed by your love for Dijiun but what I am in awe of is how much he loves you, I'm happy knowing that you will be in safe hands." She kissed the top of my forehead, just then father walked in and at the sight of me he shared the same startled look my mother had, they both looked at each other and it's like they were having a silent conversation. "XiaoJiu come." My father said softly and he put out his hand for me to take, we walked out to the peach groove where everyone was one was waiting, I didn't expect so many people to be here he really went all out, I sat down on my Dias as we patiently waited for Dijiun and after a few minutes he appeared, my face was covered but I could tell by the silence that fell upon everyone and the gentle greetings of my parents. He took a seat next to me but he didn't say a word, then ever so lightly he removed my veil. "You don't need this, don't hide from me." He whispered softly making everyone around us to giggle. " Everyone thank you for coming to celebrate the union of these two children you see, I have always dreamt of my daughter getting married but I never dreamt that she would get married to Dijiun and what's more surprising is how much he loves my daughter, all of you know Fengjiu how naughty and mischievous she is but I guess that was enough to capture Dijiun's heart, not only is she the future queen of Qingqiu but from this moment she will be the Empress heaven, Fengjiu I hope that you prosper in everything that you do, may your marriage always be happy and strong and may nothing ever break your bond with your husband." My father said sweetly and then he looked at Dijiun. "The hard cover of a person is not as what it seems, I have misunderstood you before for a number of times saying that you're cold and stone hearted but I believe now that you hadn't met the right people to know you closely, today not only Fengjiu gets a husband but I also get a son, a son who I completely and honestly trust with my whole entire being, Dijiun for what you have done for us and given us I could never repay you for it thank you for giving us a second chance, I hope that you are satisfied and loved throughout your life with XiaoJiu." He said gently and Dijiun bowed his head. "Do you have something to say to each other?" My father asked and I nodded my head quickly making everyone to laugh. "I have love you for so long but in this moment right I just loved you more than I ever have, not only do I love you with my heart but I love you with my soul too. I am at my happiest when I am with you, and I am at my greatest when I have you in my arms from today until the end of time I am completely bound to you and nothing could ever unbound us, you're mine in whichever lifetime we maybe in I will always find a way to keep as mine as long as I exist." Dijiun smiled at me sweetly and he placed both of his hands on my face. "XiaoBai my love given to me by the universe, sent to me like a shooting stars, lit up my world like the sun, love feels complete with you I lack nothing with you and in you, loving you means the world to me but loving your soul has my life in completion, you are everything a man desires and I will always cherish you. Whether I make you cry or smile you could always count on my love without doubt, even though I didn't know it but from birth I was blessed with you and you have kept me close to you all the time, it was a long but the journey that led me here is my greatest gain, I love you deeply and honestly you are my divine and everything above." He kissed my forehead gently, although there was people around us it felt like it was just the two of us in an intimate space. "Forever." I whispered. "Forever." He whispered back to me then we turned to look at father who had a look a love in his eyes. "May this journey you start with each be fruitful, you may bow to the heavens then to each other and lastly to us." We did as we were told, Dijiun smiled at me. "You're mine now, no more running." He whispered in my ears. "I Dong Hua take Bai Fengjiu of Qingqiu as my wife for all eternity, never to part with her, to never bully her to stay by her side until the end of forever." Dijiun said gently. "I Bai Fengjiu take Dong Hua as my husband to have and to hold, to love, cherish and honour, to never part with him, never to bully him but stay by his side till the end of forever." He was looking at me and something beautiful sparked in his eyes. "Here today in front of everyone, I pronounce you as husband and wife." Everyone clapped and he gave me a sweet gentle kiss on my cheek, my parents, uncles and everyone else bowed in front of us. "Congratulations Emperor Dong Hua Dijiun and Empress Bai Fengjiu." They all said in unison. "You may all rise." My husband said gently. "From here I would like you to join us at The Purple Sea, for the wedding celebration." Dijiun said softly making everyone gasp out in surprise, and quickly we left for the Purple Sea.

Happiest day of my life, my forever has been tied not to be separated by anyone, never to be broken by anybody. My fate with you have been sealed, our stars have aligned at last if this isn't happiness then I don't know what is, from this day onwards as long as I live; I will always be by your side.