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i didn't exactly know what happened after the winter formal.. i knew some shit went down with rue and jules because rue relapsed.. other than that i didn't know much.

victoria and i met up before i left, and she told me that she didn't know what was gonna happen between her and roy, but that he seemed nice. and then she left with me, even after i told her i didn't want her to leave roy alone, she insisted we leave together. it felt nice to know, even after we have two different days and don't see each other much all day, we'll still end up leaving together.

and so we did, she told me about her night and i told her about mine, specifically about me and ashtray. it was that night that i realized, i didn't just want to be be friends with him.. i also had a crush on him, and maybe in the future i wanted him to be my boyfriend.

vic didn't think it was the best decision, but i would hear that from pretty much anyone, that's not going to change my mind.

โ€”โ€”โ€”

"everyone has those, find something original."

i currently sat with ashtray, leaned against the chair he had in the freezers or the store he's always at, next to him. i was telling him about how i wanted to get matching tattoos with victoria, and if he'd do it. eventually after some convincing, he said yes. and now i sat, going through pictures of tattoos on pinterest.

"original is something you think of." i raised my eyebrows, and he rolled his eyes. "okay, so think of something."

i looked at him for a second, before nodding and taking his advice. if i was going to have something permanently on my body, it should have some meaning behind it.

"you can do little pom poms since your a cheerleader." he suggested, smiling.

i cocked my head to the side, "you're so funny." i said sarcastically. he chuckled, before leaning back in his chair.

i let out a bored sigh, before setting down my phone and turning to him. "okay, let's get to know each other better."

he turned to me, and took a second, before shrugging. "okay."

i did a gesture with my hand, telling him to go first. "alright, what's your favorite color?"

i thought for a moment, "green. what's yours?"

he tilted his head to the side, as a way of showing me, he was thinking. "ion know.. blue?"

"talking about being original.. that's like everyone's favorite color." i crossed my arms.

he rolled his eyes, "what do you want it to be? pink?"

i stuck out my bottom lip with a nod, "that would be more surprising, so yes."

he shook his head, "ight, what's your favorite song?"

i grabbed my phone, not having one in mind. i scrolled for a second, before finding one. "at the moment, 'what makes you beautiful' by one direction."

"isn't that, that one group that split up?" he furrowed his eyebrows. and i replied with a nod, "what's yours?"

"novacane, by frank ocean." i was surprised at how fast he answered, but tilted my head to the side with another nod, "that's a good one."

he didn't ask another question, and i took that as, he didn't know what to ask, so i asked one. "what's your favorite animal?"

"black panthers." he shrugged, "they look badass."

i let out a chuckle, that was predictable. "yours?" he asked, and i replied with, "snow leopards."

we went back and forth asking each other questions, and having a little argument every time we disagreed over little things, like food. and eventually, it felt like me and ashtray have been friends for years.. even though we've actually only been friends for around a month.. in my head, at least.

"yo, ash, im lockin up, you ready?" fezco came in, and it was only then that i realized how long i'd been there.

"yeah." ashtray said, standing up and grabbing his stuff.

fezco turned to me, "yo.. you're that one girls sister.. what's her name?"

i let out a chuckle, it's not everyday you find someone who doesn't know maddy. "maddy? yeah, i am."

he nodded, "yeah... you comin with us to the house?"

i turned to ashtray, who was looking at me for an answer, and i got nervous with both of their eyes on me, and reacted fast. "uh, no.. i gotta go meet my friend." i lied.

he nodded, "ight.. well, see you later then?"

i nodded, and stood up, walking over to him. "bye fez, ash." i gave them both a wave, and made my way out the store.

as i walked further down the road, i threw my head back, and dialed victoria.

"hello?" she answered after a few rings.

"hey, are you busy? are you home?" i asked.

"yeah, i'm home. why?" she answered.

"can i come over? i'm kinda just waking around right now." i chuckled to myself.

"yeah, i can meet you half way, where are you?" i smiled, victoria's such a softie.

"no, it's alright vic. i'll be there in a minute." i told her, knowing if her mom was there she would freak about her walking alone.

"no, seriously val, i can meet you." she repeated, and i chuckled.

"i'll be there in a minute." and hung up before she could force me to send her my location.


ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย ย  โ€”โ€”โ€”

"actually?!" victoria's hand flew over her mouth, as i told her i came from hanging out with ashtray.

"yeah.. why are you so shocked?" i laughed.

"because, i didn't think you were serious about being friends with him." she answered, her hand dropping from her mouth and onto her bed.

i shrugged, "he's actually kinda nice."

she furrowed his eyebrows, "yeah.. sure. do you like him?"

i raised my eyebrows at how quick she went from 'friends' to 'like.' but slowly shrugged, "i don't know.."

she leaned forward, "valerie! no!"

i let out a breathy laugh, "why? he is not that bad."

she gave me a 'are you stupid' look, before rolling her eyes. "uh, he's a drug dealer?!"

this time, it was my turn to roll my eyes. "okay? maybe i can be like the 'gangsters' little girlfriend like in the movies."

"valerie!"




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