This OC is by CROLE67 and it's a revision of her older OC that I reviewed. I hope you like it.
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Name: Mizori

Nice name

Age:
12-13(PTS Naruto)
15-17 (Shippuden)
32(Bourto)

Great, same as the Naruto group.

Gender: Female

Nice

Family:
Biological father: Dead
Biological Mother: Dead
Father: Minato (who survived due to Naruto not being born)
Mother: Kushina (due to Naruto not being born)

Nice and thanks for the roles and life status.

Appearance:
Height 5.4,
Weight 148.5

Nice and good height to weight ratio.

(15-20) Black Hair, Black eyes, light to fair skin tone. Long hair
(Pre-Shippuden 12-14), Medium Hair (Shippuden 15-20) Always straight.she wears a white shirt with the Unchia symbol on the top right of her shirt and a dark jacket with a dark red line going down the sides of the arms and has a short collar, she wears belt that has a thick little tight pieces a of cloth hanging from it as it loops around to cover everything a little in the front. She has a katana like Sauske did in the beginning of shippuden.

Good, it is nice to see her outfit is also still the same in some cases. Great job.

Personality: kind, understanding, brash, cynical, trustworthy, supportive.

Nice

Battle: She is a ninjutsu and Taijustu specialist has she was trained by Minato and Kakashi, being taught multiple powerful Justus that she further expanded, she speeds across battle fairly easily with wind style and lighting style and
•Flying Thunder God technique. •Rasengan
•Wind Bullets
•Kirin (because why not XD)
•Chidori (taught by Kakashi) •Chigan( rasengan surrounded with lighting chakra and wind chakra, this drains TONS of chakra and can only use it once a every week by the end of PTS Naruto and at the end of shippuden it still is very dangerous to use and was ranked a forbidden jutsu, she mastered eventually. It works similarly Lightning Cutting attack’s )
•Wind blades
•Lighting Cutting attack’s ( this is a justu that has wind chakra surrounds the fists and or feet, on top of the wind Chakra is Lighting chakra creating a massive explosion that ignties on contact which electrical wind cuts that can travel as fast lighting and with great Precision and with the cutting damage of the wind, this can be done at mid range as well as close.)She has the eternal mangekyou sharingan from Itachi when she killed him for destroying the Unchia Clan and stole his eyes. Her mangekyou sharingan abilities are
•Time Stop(It pauses the user in time when there she can’t move her physical body but mentally evaluate the situation and control sub astral body which can preform setup jutsu for the attack, they won’t hurt the enemy yet because the jutsu are in frozen time as well, after the setup of Justus the user goes back into the physical body and act out the actions in the frozen world at super speed, there are a limited amount of movement she can take roughly around 50 movement, 30 second cool down)
•Time View (This give the user the ability to see up to 20 different branches on how the fight will play out up to 40 minutes into the current fight when activated, the user can decide what is the most appropriate action to take or make an entirely this can only be used when in time stop mode.)

Like before these are great choices to have but with Kirin I would like to know who taught it to her? Sasuke made Kirin by himself, it was a original move so the question is how did she learn it? Sense Sasuke is not around in this OC story nobody would even know what it is.

She can also use transformation such as
•Kyubi mode
•Bijuu Mode
•Uzamaki Chains (given to her by Kushina sealing this technique inside of her much like how she did it to her self with Naruto, this drains the most chakra and is mostly impossible to use due to her not being a technical Uzamaki, but she can still use it.) These are stackable together with her eternal mangekyou sharingan which she can 1v1 Kaguya with, she kept her occupied enough so that the seals can lock her away, but ultimately she could never beat Kaguya and only did so with the help of a Lee (I can not revel how he can do this but all I can tell you is it is not gate of death) but even then it was to buy time and they kinda were slaughtered

Ok, these are good and the explanation is also great.

Past: She was an born Unchia but after the great Unchia massacre she was orphaned but not for long. Later that same day the Nine tails was released from the seal, Kushina was beaten by the whole of the past Atasuki, this happened because Obito staged a front with Itachi to have a major everyone was focused on, giving time to steal the Nine tails. Mizore who was in the woods where the Nine tails was released and she found herself standing before Kurama as he attacked her but Minato saved her, Minato decided to split the tailed beast between himself, Kushina, and Mizore because of Mizori’s immense chakra reserves (P.S like half of Naruto’s) he does this by dividing the nine tails in three separate forms one being Yin, Yang, and finally Nature. Form there she was trained by Minato and know as the Hokage’s daugther much like konohamaru

Wait, this is all good but there is one big problem. The nine tails attack and the Uchiha massacre was not on the same day. Sense Naruto and Sasuke aren't even around at this time they can't have any influence. You have to remember that Itachi was the one to kill the clan and when he did he was 12 to 13. If he killed the clan at the same time of the nine tails attack than he would be 7 to 8 years old which even though he was a genius it would be still impossible. Not to mention with the nine tails attack Naruto was just about born so he couldn't influence anything except sealing the beast in him which Mizori would have to be there for which she wouldn't be because the clan massacre happened 5 to 6 years later. I will leave a suggestion in the final Analysis.

Relationship: She is currently not married but is close friends with most of the 11 except Rock Lee because there even closer friends due to there are intense rivalry (much like there sensei) also Naruto, Sauske, and Sakura don’t exist and were replaced by my other OCs

Yes and this also adds to my point above. I still think the story can work really good but the thing is Naruto was just born so he couldn't do anything and all Sasuke saw was itachi killing everyone but this doesn't happen because Sasuke isn't around and the clan massacre along with the nine tails is in a messed up position.

Extra Stuff: She is was primarily taught by Kakahsi who taught her about the sharigan ability and how to fight like she does now, Kakashi also taught her the Chidori and helped her master the Chigan. Kakashi and Minato are Mizori’s primary teachers and had almost merged here fighting style.

Ok, thanks for the extra information.
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Final Analysis- The revision is good but there is still some things that do need to be fixed. One is the Kirin which wasn't taught to Sasuke but was created by him which wouldn't exist in your OC's world because Sasuke doesn't exist. So she wouldn't be able to learn Kirin at all unless she made it and Sasuke went through certain training which she didn't to make that move. The next is the nine tails and uchiha massacre being on the same day which wouldn't work. The two events have a 5 to 6 year difference from each other so they wouldn't be anywhere close to each other. I do have a solution that could work and keep the time line perfect. Now the solution is that Mizori is born to her biological uchiha parents but they were also good friends with Minato and Kushina so they were named the god parents. Mizori was being watched by Kushina when the attack happened and the events work to the point where she is like the new Naruto and gets the seal within her body and Minato and Kushina are saved so they don't die. From there Mizori still grows up with her parents and Minato and Kushina as her second parents. The night of the Uchiha massacre Mizori dodges a bullet because she's over Minato's and Kushina's house. In the morning they tell her what happens to her parents and clan. From there the story could go on. This is just a suggest but it can work so that both events can happen. Other than that I believe there are some questions above to answer and that's it. Thanks for letting me re-review your OC. It was a honor.
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