This OC is by iCoven
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Genre: Fanfiction

Great, I'm reading it.

Name: Katsumi Kiyomizu

A nice name

Gender: Male

Great a Male OC.

Age: Part 1: 12-13
Part 2: 16-17
The last: 19
Gaiden: 32+

Oh so the Naruto age. Good

Family: Tora Kiyomizu (Mother), Koseki Kiyomizu (older sister), Yuuto Kiyomizu (father), Guren (distant relative)

Thanks and I see he even has a distant relative. That must mean he's important.

Highest Rank: Gennin 
Exams Taken: Gennin, Chunnin
Exams Failed: Chuunin (preliminary)

Oh so he also failed. That makes him unique because most OCs don't fail.

Appearance:

Height: 5’5
Weight: 134 lbs

Nice height to weight ratio.

Skin tone: Little lighter than tan

Nice

Eyecolor: Onyx

Oh, it's nice to see a OC with black eyes.

Hair Academy: Katsumi’s hair is light brown and buzz cut.

Oh ok, that would make him look young so great.

Part 1: His hair grows just a bit (around the same as adult naruto), darkens, and is spiky.  

Oh so only a slight change. That's good.

Other: he has freckled cheeks

Nice, seeing OCs with other facial features like freckles makes them different.

Headband Location: forehead

Cool

Clothes: Katsumi wears a red sleeveless jacket with a black short sleeved shirt underneath, khaki pants, and black ninja sandals. Both of his legs are bandaged, and his clan’s symbol is on the back of his jacket. He also wears a black custom made mask that he wears when he’s outside to prevent asthma and allergy triggers.  

A nice appearance and I am guessing that khakis are like the regular ninja pants. It was also great adding in a mask for his allergies and asthma. It great seeing a OC who has real life problems.

Personality: Katsumi is blatantly rude and mean, even to his two best friends and family (excluding his father. he’s deathly afraid of his father.) but will occasionally apologize if he feels he’s taken it too far. He’s really cocky and loud. Many people label him as more annoying than Naruto Uzumaki. He finds almost everything humorous and often laughs at inappropriate times, he’s basically seen as an immature child and bully. Despite all of his bad traits, he does have a soft side for sick people in the hospital and secretly/anonymously leaves crystallized gifts for the patients, especially the children.

So he is viewed like a bad guy but he does have his soft side that would make him. "Human" as others would say. That's great, it shows his weakness against people in the hospital. Great.

He has a major deal of respect for doctors and nurses and proves that he actually has manners, but just chooses not to use them. He’s also honest, sometimes too honest and it can come off as rude. He just doesn't feel that need to sugar-coat anything. He’s also egotistical, can be prideful, and very ignorant because of his thinking he knows everything. He will show little to no effort in something until he sees people surpassing him, then he decides he wants to put work in.

Ah so he is the arrogant one in the personality group of OCs. He has manners but doesn't show it for his own benefit. Everything about him fits into a mean personality group except his soft side. It's amazing.

After the events of Konoha Crush, Katsumi has a rude awakening and undergoes a BIG personality change. After receiving news from his father that his mother and sister are in severe condition due to battling to save the village, and were on the verge of dying, his life kind of flashed before his eyes. He thought back to the way he treated then that morning and even before then and deeply regret his behavior. He becomes considerate, apologetic, mannerable, friendly and more. He remains blatantly honest though.

So a important event sparks him into changing. That can happen and it does in real life. It's great seeing you use real life scenarios and putting them in your OC. It makes him a more realistic character and someone that people can relate too.

Extra: headstrong, selfish, rude, mean, sarcastic, unapproachable, hotheaded, stubborn, crude, reckless, prideful (Before Konoha Crush)

Thank you for putting the before, it let's us know when he acted like this instead of guessing. Great job.

Chakra Nature(s): Earth Release, Crystal Release

Nice, however I would like you to know that crystal release is a fandom release. If you are going for more canon stuff than the crystal release wouldn't be up there. But it is still good.

Ninjutsu Range: mostly long distance 

Oh a far away fighter. That's cool.

Fighting Style: offensive and defensive (he has one defensive jutsu so overall he’s skilled in offensive fighting)

Ok, everyone should have at least one defensive jutsu in their mind.

Chakra Control: Average

Nice.

Weapons: kunai, sai (gift from his father), shiruken, wire string, spare masks (not a wepon, but he keeps this in his pouch just in case)

Oh a weapon passed down and the common weapons. Good.

Battle Style: Majority of the time, Katsumi will fight alongside his teammates, but sometimes he gets a little out of hand and becomes reckless. He usually uses the most chakra and becomes exhausted first, which of course annoys his teammates. Over time he learns not to be so wild and fights skillfully, taijutsu being his strong point and falling back on his crystal release when things start to get a little tough.

Ok so if he focuses on long range than wouldn't he work more on ninjutsu? Taijutsu is the art of fighting in hand to hand combat which is short range. In the range above you said he was long range. So that raises the question, does he switch to taijutsu and now fight short range? Or does he fight short range rarely?

Past:
Katsumi was born the second child of Tora and Yuuto Kiyomizu. He was born two months premature due to pregnancy complications and was severely underweight with irregular heart beats and shortened (or sometimes even not) breathing, so the doctors assumed he would die either during infancy or his childhood. He had to stay in the Leaf’s hospital up until he was around eight months old when he was finally doing good for a long period of time. The doctors suggested to his parents not to get too happy because he could get worse at any given moment.

This is the most realistic backstory I have ever seen for a OC. This brings what happens to babies and what could happen when one is born differently than another baby. He is very different from OCs I have seen in the past. The realism in his past is great.

His health only got better from there though; he was eating like he's supposed to, gaining weight properly, playing like the average child, and even growing like one. He was completely healthy. At least until he turned three and had an asthma attack with a severe cold following behind it. In fear that his health might continue to decline at any given moment, Tora began treating him like a sick child. She gave him everything he wanted, and loosely disciplined him for saying rude or inappropriate things, even when he’d say it to her. She’d merely apologize if he’d misbehave in public.

Oh so a miracle happened that he would live. Beautiful, but I also like how the fear of losing her child made her let him do whatever he want when he wanted. It makes sense, she almost lost him before and some parents would act like this cause they don't want to leave their children which would make them act how she is now. Very realistic.

Yuuto disagreed with this tactic and grew annoyed with Tora because of this. He treated Katsumi like any other child and would discipline him like one by taking away his favorite toy as punishment. They argued quite often over this. When he was around 4, he saw his now best friend, Jirou, and developed a sort of crush on him because he thought he was a girl. When he finally decided to talk to him, he discovered that Jirou was not a girl, but a boy. He was highly embarrassed (and still is from time to time, he absolutely hates when it's brought up). He was too embarrassed to look at him even look at him, but Jirou talked with him and reassured him that it was okay because it happens often, then offered to become his friend. Since then, they've been inseparable.

The way the two parents argue because of this situation is perfect. You can tell which one is, how should I say, well quipped for Katsumi. It's also funny seeing how Katsumi and Jirou became friends, the awkwardness that happened because of a gender misunderstanding. It brings a comical relief to the tense atmosphere.

A year after, he met Junko in the park after Jirou introduced and invited her to play ninja. Katsumi absolutely hated the idea, and thus, they had a rocky start. Overtime they grew close though, and he does care for her alot. He spends more time with her as compared to Jirou though because he trains with her often. A year after meeting Junko, the three of them became eligible for the academy, but Katsumi didn't want to be a ninja. His father decided otherwise and forced him to join because he thought it'd teach him a lesson in the long run. When classes finally started, Katsumi would trick his mother by playing sick and stayed home a lot, at least until she caught on to what he was doing. (She was infuriated with him for a while because he made her believe that his health was declining again)

Spoke like a true child that doesn't want to go to school. Its relatable in so many ways that I'll need three hands to count them off. This character brings a real personality, a real person into play.

After that, he started skipping classes, which also didn't last long because his father found him and basically made him feel bad by telling him how disappointed he was in him. After that he started going to classes, but didn't actually pay attention to the lessons and often fell asleep. This came to a stop after he realized Junko was starting to surpass him, thanks to Jirou’s mom. By the time of graduation, Katsumi had an A in ninjutsu, B in taijutsu, and C in genjutsu, C in classroom attitude, D in positivity, and a F in cooperation.

A very unique character and his personality goes great with how he looks on his friends and acts in the academy. The way he is just brings that light to show when he does something he's not supposed too. Also great job on keeping him the same instead of changing him into 4 different personality groups.

Relationships:
Katsumi has a rocky relationship with his mother and sister, mostly due to his nasty attitude. He and Koseki often get into arguments about even the smallest thing, and don't often get along. They love each other dearly though, even though they never say it to each other (at least until after Konoha Crush, where to Koseki’s surprise, Katsumi says it first). His relationship with his mother isn't much better. He disobeys her quite often, at least up until she reaches her breaking point and snaps at him. He loves her dearly, but doesn't respect her as nearly as much as he does his father.

I love how the rockyness of the relationship is cause of his attitude and how after the events of konoha crush he changes. The way him and his mother is shows what a nasty personality can do to affect relationships with even the closest to us. But he still has that sense of love which we all do have. Great job.

(It's not a gender thing, it's a matter of who disciplined him the most type of thing, and unfortunately his mother did not so he believes he can get away with almost anything around her. Therefore his “respect” isn't as high, if that makes sense?)

It makes total sense. Thanks for spelling it out.

He does respect Jirou’s mom, too, as much as he is scared of her because she absolutely will not tolerate any ounce of disrespect towards her or anyone else in her presence. His best friends are his childhood friends, Jirou Naosu and Junko Yuki, who he is very close with and kind of the only friends he has. No One else really likes him (until his change). He has a very close bond and strong love for his tiger cub summoning named “Yajū”(Beast), and its older sister, “Bibō”(Beauty). (Also, his relationship with his mother and sister become much stronger after his personality change)

Nice, the before and after effect really shows the relationship between him, his sister and mother. Its also good to see that in a environment he isn't familiar with, in the sense he can't get away with something, he finds respect with that person. It makes him see his boundaries. Also who is Yaju and Bibo? I would like to know more about them. They sound interesting.

His relationship with his father is mostly built off of fear and respect-ish, they don't actually talk outside of training. His father mostly insults him and his childish behavior. His respect for his father drops completely after he burns the teddy bear that was gifted to him as a child. It might seem like a silly reason, but it was special to him and he wasn't ready to part with it yet. I don't really have a lover for him planned at the moment.

No, that is all completely fine and the reason does make sense as to why he loses respect for his father. The teddy bear was of sentimental value and it was stripped away from him. Of course he would dislike or lose respect for who ever burned it. Good job.

Other information: 

Clan: Kiyomizu Clan

Nice

Jutsu: Crystal Style: Crimson Fruit (defensive), Crystal Style: Crystal Needles, Summoning Jutsu

Nice moves. I hope to hear more about the summoning jutsu.

Extra Abilities: n/a (as of now)

That's fine.

Fun facts:

Jirou’s mom brings Katsumi to the hospital at least once a week to give him a breathing treatment and a weekly check up.

Oh ok

Katsumi is afraid of water due to almost drowning once in his childhood.

That would cause fear.

He has a stuffed bunny rabbit that he has an emotional attachment to. It was gifted to him from his mother when he was stuck in the hospital

I can see why it gives him value and how his father burning it made him lose respect for him.
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Final Analysis-

This OC has nothing to work on. It's detailed, it has a compelling backstory, it has a realistic vibe. To be honest this is the most realistic OC I have reviewed so far. It brings the struggles of real life into play and shows it's up and downs. This OC is portrayed as not the best person and has rocky relationships with people. He has his comical reliefs and has his serious moments. This OC is really good and I can tell that you worked hard on him. It was a honor doing Katsumi. Thank you for choosing me to do your OC.