I watched Caleb get ready for his date, running around in his room trying to find his shoes. He decided to wear a black long sleeve polo with khaki pants and low top black converses. He styled his hair with gel, slicking up just enough to make it seem like it was still flowing. He looked towards the door finally, and said, "Darrius will be here in a few, so I will be out of here soon enough."

"What time are you coming back," I asked him leaning against the door frame, "You know I'm leaving in the morning, so I need you in at a decent hour."

He stuck his nose up looking at me through his side eye, probably seeing right through why I really asked. I didn't want this day to be interrupted between Chris and I because I was finally going to at least get a better understanding of what we are going towards. I'm the one that made the arrangement but at the same time I wanted more when I asked for it. I didn't know it yet, but I felt it.

Caleb came walking towards me as he said, "I'll be home around 10 or 11. I don't know what he has planned but I know we are going to end up at his house."

That made me feel excited about the amount of time I was going to spend with Chris, but then again it put an image in my mind about what they could be doing at Darrius's house. My face must have reflected how I felt because he hit me to aggressively state, "We don't always have sex, ass!"

It was my turn to give him the side glance, but I left it alone throwing my hands up in surrender when the doorbell ringed. I made my way down the stairs and the doorbell kept ringing. I already knew who it was before I even answered. I swung open the mahogany door and saw Darrius still playing with my doorbell holding a royal blue package wrapped in a lighter blue bow. I turned an eyebrow up at him until he noticed I had opened the door. He stopped what he was doing so I could look at his outfit. It was just a simple long sleeve round neck grey shirt with blue jeans. It was a little looser than the way my brother wore his clothes with grey sneakers that were Jordan's I believe. I don't wear them but I know how they look.

"You know you are going to have to fix my shit if you break it," I warned him letting him come in. He was emotionless before I closed the door and said, "Nice to see you too and is Caleb ready yet? He makes us late for everything."

"Yea, he is almost ready," I told him, "He still wants to look good for you. While you wear whatever for him."

He rolled his eyes and said, "I dress nice."

"You dress like you borrow your older brother's clothes," I stated laughing.

"You dress like if you take a strong breath your buttons will pop right off. Now leave me alone," He spat out. I leaned back in surprise at how harshly he responded and replied, "Damn what's wrong with you?"

He was biting the inside of his cheek before he answered, "Because of you, Chris is mad at me."

"What? Why?"

"I told him that I knew his dad was coming to the party," He angrily stated, "Then he got pissed because we tell each other everything and I didn't tell him that. Then some other shit about me being up Caleb's ass and not even checking in on him. Plus, he hasn't even spoken to me since then. So, thank you for asking."

I smiled awkward before saying, "Don't put that shit on me."

"You told me not to tell him! If you and Caleb didn't say not to I would have told him. Now he is questioning my loyalty. He has never done that."

"Listen Darrius- "

"No, I've heard you talk," He stated looking up at the stairs before whispering, "Now you are going to listen to me. You suck at handling my best friend."

I wanted to respond because he was getting closer to my face, but I let him continue, "Chris isn't like one of those prissy, money hungry dudes you like. He doesn't care about how good you look or what type of clothes you wear. What he likes is loyalty. He hates liars and you are digging yourself deeper into a grave to a point Chris won't even want to speak to you again."

My ears perked up hearing that Chris may stop trying if I continue to do the things I do. It wasn't surprising but seeing that Darrius was speaking up about it, told me that I really must have messed up. He saw my troubled expression and huffed then said, "If you really like Chris, make sure whatever you do today, goes well."

I turned to him squinting my eyes and smiled, "Yea Caleb told me. I said you both wouldn't last 3 hours, and he said 1."

"He has no faith," I joked and he laughed but I could tell something else was on his mind other than Chris and I. He did mention that Chris thought he was spending too much time with Caleb and him questioning his loyalty seemed to hit him hard. I reached out and touched his shoulder as he looked at me.

"You okay?" I asked him and before he could open his mouth, Caleb came rushing down the stairs smiling. Darrius instant expression was a soft smile. I could easily tell how my brother's appearance altered his mood however from his body language I could see that not even my brother could distract him from what's really brothering him.

"You finally ready to go," He sarcastically asked and Caleb wasn't even paying attention as he saw the present. He easily snatched it away, excited to see what was in the box. Darrius looked just as shocked as me but we knew there was no stopping him. He took off the wrapping paper and opened the box. He stuck his hand in and pulled out a sliver heart shaped necklace with a royal blue stone in the center. Caleb looked on curious but smiling until his fingers went to open the necklace up. Now I was curious as tears begin to well up in his eyes and Darrius said, "Now you get to take them wherever you go."

I stepped over to look at what was in it and once I looked, I felt myself getting teary eyed. It was a picture of our mom and dad. I didn't even notice how much of my dad's features were in us. From his blonde hair and strong jawline to his wide smile and tall stature. Then there was my mom. Her blue eyes pierce through the picture and I let out a small laugh looking at how big her hair was. They were outside in the park and I could tell by the filter on the pictures that this was taking when I was smaller.

"Where you get these pictures," I asked wiping my tears. Darrius wiped Caleb's and said, "I kind of stole them from the old house."

Caleb and I both stared crookedly at his boyfriend before he stated, "I was a kid, keep that in mind."

I smiled along with my brother and just wanted to continue to stare. We had pictures of my parents but nothing like this. They were themselves and even though I wanted to know why a small kid stole pictures, I didn't want to ruin the moment for them. I then remembered that I had my own plans for today, so I straighten myself up and begin to push them towards the door.

"Hey, can I at least put my locket on?" Caleb protested struggling to hold the open box as I continued to push.

"You can put it on in the car, "I said finally getting them out the door, "You did a great job with the gift D. Now leave."

They stood there a second before shaking their heads to leave. Before I even closed the door, I heard Caleb say, "I'm telling you, they not even going to last 30 minutes."

**

I had already made homemade pepperoni pizza. It was something for lunch and dinner so that way we wouldn't have to worry about cooking anything. It was just going to be him and me. By ourselves. No sex.

"Oh God you are an idiot, " I whined falling back on to the couch. I had changed into a pair black Nike sweatpants and a white t-shirt. These were stuffed so far in my closet that I'm sure it would have taken hours to get the wrinkles out. Chris was on his way and I just wanted to show him that I wasn't just some guy that cared about how he looked. I wanted him to see me. I also decided to show him what was in the closed room. Not even Caleb knew what was in there but I'll spring it on Chris later.

I was shaking and was sure that I was panicking for nothing. Just, we had both prided ourselves at being sexually advanced, but Chris was the only one of us that had a conscience of when he did something wrong. I on the other hand never really learned from my mistakes and do them all over again. The bell ringed and I almost slipped off the couch. I straighten myself up and went to open it. My hand was shaking turning the knob. I opened the door to reveal a smiling Chris dressed in similar sweats but wearing a comfortable red long sleeve shirt. It was thin to the point I could see his nipples peek through and thought, "This was going to be really hard."

"Hey," He greeted before sniffing, "You made pizza?"

"Yea," I answered getting out of the way, so he could walk through, "That way we won't have to go out or anything."

He nodded in approval but I caught him shivering as I closed the door. I placed my hands on his arms, moving them up and down to warm him. His muscles relaxed under my fingers and I had to retreat before I went further. I didn't catch that he was carrying something in his hand. It looked like a board game and a few movies but I wasn't really sure. He took his shoes off and sat them down by the couch before saying, "Well, what are we going to do?"

At this point my mind went blank. I wasn't sure how I wanted to start this day. I was really hoping to just let things flow naturally but I guess I should have planned something. He continued to give me a confused stare before I looked over to what he had and saw what the board game was. I smirked looking at it because I hadn't played it in so long.

"Oh my God, " I said grabbing it, "You really want to challenge me in Sorry youngster?"

His face contorted as he got up and fiercely stated, "No old man. You sure you want to challenge me? I'm known for whoopin' ass in this game. I never lose."

I chuckled, patting him on the head condescendingly and said, "Well, I may be a little rusty myself but I have never lost either."

He stared right into my eyes and I could see the competitiveness oozing from them. He didn't scare me though. This was one thing I loved more than sex, winning.

"What color you use?" I asked placing the board on the floor as he sat down with me.

"Red all day," He says still giving me that intense glare.

"Funny how blue is going to destroy that ass," I state getting out our game pieces. He sits up straight ready for battle and I sat down across from him, pushing the table out the way. We argued most of the time about the rules. Then he would knock one of my pawns over and say that it was valid. I'll do the same thing to show him that we were even. He made me laugh every time he would pick up a card because he would take one, look at it, then take an entire minute to see what pawn he wanted to move. Then I "accidently" knocked the board over and he thought that was cheating because he almost had all his pawns in.

"You a fucking cheater!" He yelled with his hand pointed straight out at me before putting it down.

"No like my foot hit the board when I was crossing my legs," I said smiling, knowing I was lying through my teeth.

"You are a freaking liar dude! I was about spank that ass!"

"No, you were not! We can just start a new game and- "

"Naw fuck that, I won!"

"Did you really?" I said shrugging my shoulders before he came flying towards me. He was careful not to knock me into table, but he put me in a mean headlock after.

"Say you a sore loser," He commanded playfully and I wasn't going to go out like a bitch. I easily maneuvered my way out of the headlock and put him into one of my own.

"No, how about you just accept that it was an accident," I stated out of breath. He begins to stand, knocking the game piece entirely off the board. He moved towards the couch and fell back, slamming me on the cushions. I winced, letting him go and saw him standing up smiling. I used my legs to cage him in and he fell right on top of me. His hands landed on either side of my head as he hovered over me. We were both breathing heavily and just grinning like a pack of hyenas. Then I just zeroed in on his smile. It wasn't as perfect as I thought it was with his canines being slightly larger than normal but other than that they were bright and straight.

"I like your teeth," I said out loud and he blushed. He lifted himself off me and went to go clean up the game. I've seen that he gets really quiet whenever I compliment him. I pulled myself on the couch as I watched him put the game away. He smiled coming over to sit by me. I moved closer to him and put his legs over my lap, rubbing on his thigh. I wasn't trying to start anything, it just felt natural to do. He looked away smiling again before saying, "So what's your story?"

"Huh?" I questioned.

"You know...your coming out story."

I tensed up thinking about it because it went hand and hand with my scar story. My family wouldn't have known if what happened, didn't. Even though I was reluctant, he asked and Darrius told me what really makes him like someone is loyalty. I took a deep breath and begin, "My story was very violent."

The excited expression faded from his face hearing me say it. I continued, "When I was fifteen, I had a big crush on this senior name Justin Newson. He was the school president and the hottest guy in the school. He looked like Brad Pitt."

Chris scrunched up his face before asking, "Now Brad Pitt or 90s Brad Pitt?"

"Is there a difference?" I laughed not getting what he was trying to say.

"Uhmmmm, yea," He answered, "The now Brad Pitt looks like somebody's dad."

"He is somebody's dad," I laughed as he rolled his eyes before I continued, "Anyway...he was hot. I was a freshman and didn't know much. I knew that I liked guys but I didn't want everyone else to know. Somehow, faith brought Justin to my classroom to talk to our class. The moment our eyes met...I knew I was in trouble."

He started to play with my ear as I took myself back to that time. I hadn't grown to my full size yet and I dressed just like Caleb does. Blue jeans and khakis with whatever shirt was clean. Somehow, I had caught Justin's eye and he never let me forget. Every day after class and lunch he would be waiting for me. As a freshman, I just liked the attention. He took me around his friends and we would talk outside of school. By that point, I knew he liked me.

We would send email messages and texts about how we felt about each other. He was the first to ask about coming over. I knew what he wanted but I wasn't ready for it. I hadn't even kissed anyone yet. However, Justin was a senior and everyone knew him. To pass up on this chance was social suicide. I was surprised that when he came over, Caleb instantly said he was a bad person. He was only 7 and already knew this wasn't going to end well. I just didn't pay attention.

"Did you guys have sex?" Chris asked now leaning against the couch. I shook my head and said, "Not the first time he came over. My parents were home. Now when we did do it, I wasn't home. I was in his car."

He didn't respond for a few seconds but asked, "Did it hurt?"

I nodded and replied, "Yea but only for a little bit. It was more uncomfortable because I was in a car."

"Did you guys become a couple?" He asked sounding as if he didn't want to ask. I slightly smirked and said, "No we didn't. We weren't out and I was kind of losing interest. But he did want me to only have eyes for him."

"Oh shit," he said stretching and smiling, "This is where you get your player card right?"

I laughed along but shook my head, "Naw because I still had no game. This is where things took a whole different turn."

I was feeling that memory again. I clutched on to the wound as I drifted back into my head. Justin had just gotten out of a class and I was waiting on him. My friend came up to talk for a bit and a strong grip begin to carry me away. I looked up to find that Justin had pulled me by my arm and we were going towards the bathroom. He made sure everyone was out before he started yelling. He called me ugly and no one wouldn't love me because he was the only person that would even give me a chance. That was the first and second to last time I gave him my attention.

"What was the last time?" Chris asked and the memory came back strong. I didn't want to say it. I didn't want to let him know what happened. I felt his hand on mine and didn't know that he had moved from his spot.

"You're shaking man," He said as I continued to blankly stare at him. Telling anyone this scared me. It made it real again. I felt his hand on my face, wiping the tears I didn't know was leaving my eyes. I was frozen in this terrible headspace, but my lips begin to move, "It was the last day for the seniors and everybody was going to a basketball players party."

I could hear the loud speakers and the smell of teenagers soaked in alcohol. I wanted to leave the minute I saw Justin was there. He had been emailing me nonstop and showed up to my house making my dad almost call the police. I told him I could handle it but I was blind to what he was capable of. I couldn't get a way home, so I had to wait until my friend decided he wanted to leave. I did what any teenager would do. I roamed the house until I found a quiet place to sit.

Justin found me and I went to get up from my spot when he snatched me by my arm.

"You can't keep avoiding me Harry," He spat out as his grip became stronger. His short nails were digging into my arm as he spoke again, "We are meant to be together."

"You're fucking crazy man," I yelled trying to remove his hand from my arm. His face was red and he had a creepy grin across his face.

"So, you are just going to leave me? Is that it?" he asked sounding more like he was daring me to answer. I pushed him away to answer his question and get a space to run. Then everything happened in slow motion. One minute my back was turned and the next a knife was in my stomach. I was too in shock to feel the pain, but my focus was on his face again. He was smiling and crying as if he just did something worthwhile.

"Now you won't have to leave me for anyone else," He smiled as I stood there holding the place where he stabbed me. I could feel the stickiness of my blood on my hand and body becoming limp. He pulled away as I wrestled with trying to stay balanced. I had knocked over the small table and I finally found my voice to yell. I was falling but not before I heard someone's footsteps running. They had come up behind Justin and wrestled him to the ground, knocking the knife out of his hand. Then I felt someone lift me up but I was out.

"Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital," I said laying in Chris's lap, "The police had gotten involved and I had to tell them everything that happened. Including telling my parents since I was underage."

"Did he go to jail," Chris asked letting his fingers caress my hair mindlessly. I nodded against his thigh and said, "Come to find out, he had serious psychological issues since his dad left his mom a few years back. I wasn't the only one who reported him, but he got out of the charges quickly. The guys that witness it said similar things had happened to their friends but not to that point. "

I paused for a second before I said, "That is how I came out to my parents."

Chris took a deep breath, probably gathering up all the information I just pushed out on him. He replied after a few seconds of silence, "Well, I see you most definitely have a type. Crazy ass pretty boys."

I chuckled at him as he laughed. He moved his hand through my hair again before speaking again, "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"I've never told anyone that story," I stated getting up and locking my eyes with him, "You must be really special."

"Hehehe," He chuckled popping his shirt, "Well, I would like to think so."

I shook my head, pushing his legs off me. I stood up, remembering what I wanted to show him. I motioned for him to come with me and he hesitatingly got up from the couch. I made my way around the kitchen as he followed behind me.

"I want to show you something else," I said going down the narrow hallway towards the den. I stopped at my locked room and I heard him gasp.

"You are going to show me what's in this room," He excitedly asked, "I've been wanting to know what was in there. Is it like 50 shades of grey or is it like creepy shit you collect?"

"Not creepy shit but it is a collection, "I laugh putting in the pass code. I stopped after cracking the door open and teased, "You sure you ready to see?"

"Harry!"

I laughed before opening the door. I stepped aside to let him come in and from the way his eyes lit up, I could tell he was very impressed.