F I F T Y S I X

SCOUT STOOD OUTSIDE his apartment, her heart feeling as though it was crawling up her esophagus.

She woke up early the next day after her talk with Xander, still unsure about what she wanted to do. Of course, she decided that she was going to tell Spencer the truth last night. But now as she had her hand out to knock on his front door, the solution wasn't as obvious.

"I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't, huh?"

If Scout told him the truth, she didn't know how he'd react.

No, that was a lie.

She knew he'd be livid. He would push her away, yell at her, maybe never talk to her again. And the whole team would be on his side, which would result in some form of legal punishment to be taken over by the government. Her life would be ruined.

Scout inwardly grimaced, retracting her hand away with a pause.

But, all those thoughts weren't new. She knew this was coming from the beginning she became too invested with the BAU, it was only a matter of 'when'.

The only difference was that she had control over the situation. She would be the one to tell him everything. She would be the one speaking the truth. She had the power and the ability to be gentle with him.

No one else would be outing her.

So, she puffed up her shoulders and sternly knocked on the door. It felt strangely familiar, like all those moments she would visit him before they ever started dating.

Like the time she picked him up before their undercover case, like the time she drunkly pushed herself onto him, or all those movie marathons and late nights doing whatever they wanted, for however long they wanted to do it.

"One last perfect day. And after that, I'll tell him." Scout whispered quietly to herself, toying with the engagement ring that she never took off.

The door swung open, revealing the face she had missed so dearly this past month.

"Scout? What are you doing here?"

Spencer looked tired. He was still dressed in his pajamas; an old t-shirt, fading sweatpants, and brightly colored yet mismatched socks. The wavy locks on his head were messy, like he had just woken up within the past hour.

Her brow scrunched together and pulled out her phone, "Spence, it's like 1 PM, did you just wake up?"

"I stayed up late last night."

The doctor shyly smiled, rubbing the back of his neck and stretching at the same time. He pulled the door open further, signaling her to come in.

"What book was it this time?" Scout gave him a lopsided smirk, laying her keys and cell phone on the kitchen counter.

"It - wasn't a book."

Whatever confidence she seemingly had soon deflated, and was replaced by what she could only describe as - a hypnic jolt.

It was the feeling where as your breathing and heart rate slow down and your body temperature drops, and your muscle tone shifts. Your brain misinterprets the relaxing of your muscles as a sign that you're actually falling and signals your muscles to tense up, in order to protect you.

"Oh." She spoke in a flat tone and cleared her throat, "Well, I'm glad to hear that you're doing better."

"What?"

Scout bit down on her bottom lip, "I - I should've called before I came. It was a stupid mistake on my part, really. I mean, your a handsome guy and you have needs. Any girl would be fucking bonkers to pass you up."

As she darted towards the door, Spencer grabbed her forearm and halting her leaving.

"Scout, what the hell are you talking about?"

Her jaw came loose, "You - You had?"

She didn't want to finish the sentence.

"I had - what? Someone over last night? That's what you think?"

The brunette didn't want to respond. She averted her eyes towards the living room, seeing how it looked completely untouched from the last time she was there.

"Look at me, Scout."

But she refused, still not wanting to see his big, brown eyes staring back at her through pleading eyelashes.

"Please, love. Look at me."

Spencer let go of her arm, snaking his around her waist while his other hand grabbed her chin and guided it towards him. She was right: his eyes were practically begging her.

"I didn't have anyone over last night, or any other night this past month. I would never, never do that to you. Especially after all that we've been through. I still love you, I never stopped loving you."

"But the baby -"

"The baby was out of our control. I told you back at the hospital. Loosing him would never change how I feel about you, or that I still want to marry you. That is, unless you changed your mind?"

'No,' She thought. 'But you might regret saying all of that tonight.'

"I love you too, Spencer. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for pushing you away. I - I - I didn't know what that to do anymore. I didn't know how I was supposed to keep going. I felt like a part of me died when we lost the baby."

Spencer pulled her into his arm, letting his chin rest on top of her head, "I know. I felt the same way, love. And if I'm being completely honest, I pushed you away too. I didn't try and talk to you, I didn't make more of an effort to seek you out."

"Spencer, don't -"

He let go of his hold around her, walking in a pace that stretched back and forth. Finally, Spencer wiped his mouth in search of words to say.

"No," He shook his head. "I'm supposed to be the man in this relationship and I let you deal with it all by yourself. I knew you were in pain and I left you alone. You may not have wanted me around, but I knew you needed me."

Spencer paused in his pacing - coming to grips with some terms in his head - as he averted his eyes to Scout and spoke.

"Look, Scout - I'm sorry for the way I've been acting towards you, I know I've been acting like a complete dick, and a idiot, a real jerk, a complete and utter ass--"

He stopped with a kind of dumfounding expression.

"Fell free to stop me any time." The doctor suggested with a shrug.

"Why?" Scout let out a small chuckle. "You seem to be taking the words right out of my mouth."

A very lightly smile formed on Spencer's face when hearing that. She always seemed to have the balls to stand up to him and tell him upright what she thought. The doctor was actually finding that rather attractive.

Scout snorted before she continued. "Look, you're all those things and much more but -"

Spencer's face fell into an unimpressed expression as he listened to Scout continuing his insults against him.

"You better be going somewhere with this..."

"Shh - don't interrupt," Scout hushed.

Spencer's eye widened and his mouth parted slightly, yet, familiar feelings were beginning to erupt with in him, feelings he had felt before.

"But above all that Spencer, you're brave and loyal and your friends love you greatly. Now, I know there's different sides of you, I've seen them so many times before and, if I'm being completely honest, I miss him." Scout mused, seeing Spencer slyly smirk.

The young female spoke in a very arousing way - instantly tripping the mood to an area the doctor hadn't felt in a long time. Spencer's smirk died as he silently gulped when hearing her like that, his face drained of confidence he liked to show in proving he was in charge as the brunette got up and made her way over slowly towards him.

His stomach fell into knots.

Spencer was involuntarily backing up slowly from the seducing woman, her walk was so very sexy and he could feel his face burning up under the situation.

He stammered in thoughts, still backing up but having one hell of a reaction down low. Spencer came to a holt as his back clanked against a wall - thus trapping him to go no further. Scout's mouth fell into a sinister smirk as her face drew closer to Spencer's. The man, trying to keep control and show he was calm, tilted his head upwards - still keeping eye contact with Scout and swallowed silently while maintained a steady breathing paten.

"I know you miss me too," Softly murmured Scout, as she slowly sniffed up close to his neck and across as though she was an animal herself.

"Tell me I'm not making this up."

She breathed. Spencer's mouth slowly opened. Eventually, he laughed awkwardly trying to set aside what she had just done as well as the fact she was pressing those rather tasty looking desirable breasts against him.

It had been a very, very long time since they both had satisfied each other sexually.

The bulge in his sweatpants were obvious to the pair. It was a sign that he did want her, that he still thought about her that way. The well never ran dry, even when she was pregnant.

"You're not."

He said gruffly, though Scout merely gazed at him.

He could tell by the look in Scout's eyes that she was trying to figure him out. She remained staring at him a moment, and it was actually making him feel very uncomfortable. It felt like years since the last time she had looked at him in such a way. She spoke again, only this time, Scout slowly stroked Spencer's arms, and flicked her hair back to reveal a good side of her neck.

Spencer's cheeks flushed red, sudden embarrassment at how quickly she had turned him on. He felt  as anxious as he did when they first started dating.

"Do I make you nervous, Spencer?"

Her voice was so soft and sweet - making Spencer's teeth clench and his muscles tense, an overly painful sensation deep down. His body quivered pleasurably at her delicate touch but also in pain. He needed a life jacket before he really did drown and lose control of his self completely.

Spencer was fighting with his hands not to touch her and he could feel himself losing that control any second if she didn't stop.

The brunette could sense the contempt he was holding against himself in denying her. So it was with a devilish smirk coming to her lips, she swiftly devised a plan. Before Spencer knew it, Scout was gently nuzzling and kissing his neck.

'God!'

The doctor praised mentally, shutting his eyes and trying to force himself into his thoughts.

'She's really pushing it!' He thought, but suddenly he felt a wet line tail up his neck as the beautiful female licked him.

'That's it!'

That was it. He couldn't fight it no more. He couldn't fight her!

His hands grabbed the top of Scout's arms - rather roughly - hearing a sudden whimper from her. Their breathing got faster and faster in anticipation of what was going to happen. Two pairs of brown eyes stayed focused on each other, already full of need, lust, and a little fear.

After several moment, Scout forcefully pulled Spencer away from the wall and into her - having their mouths touch. She felt a little resistance from the doctor but he soon caught up to what was happing and kissed back. Upon contact, both could feel their hearts exploding as they gave in.

Their eyes shut softly, indulging in the affection.

He growled softly into the kiss, grabbing a tight but possessive hold of her before breaking from it and switching spots. He accidentally slammed her into the wall that he was just up against and heard another sudden whimper from her. The male apologized immediately before capturing those sweet lips again in glory.

Spencer forced himself to take heavy control of his strength, he wasn't overly strong but she felt so delicate in his arms.

He'd do anything to not stop this moment. The quick action of the young woman hitting the wall had knocked over his books and a few items off the shelf right by them - but that didn't bother either one.

Spencer set to kissing up her neck in a motion so tender, he didn't even realize he possessed. Hearing her gasp and moan softly under the beautiful attention only encouraged him all the more. And he knew from her noises, she was enjoying it.

Scout pulled Spencer in closer to her - having him pick her up, where she instantly and eagerly wrapped her legs around his hips, all while being pushed against the wall.

"Oh, God!"

She mewled blissfully, feeling his hardness press into clothes. The doctor held her pinned against the wall and himself, feeling his throbbing length press against her - eagerly wanting to satisfy his erection but he couldn't.

Something was holding him back.

Holding her there as the two kissed hungrily, he caressed and fondled her.

Soft moans escaped her, adding more arousal to the situation but he did not try to have their covered sex rub each other. Scout kissed him firmly, knowing exactly what she was doing. Spencer, still a little unsure on what was going on, went with it and made a daring move.

Scout felt him asking for entrance of her mouth with his tongue and without hesitation, she welcomed him. Their tongues met and rubbed together so gracefully. It was hungrily at first, but he wanted to savour it as she moaned softly into the kiss

"Ahh, Spencer!"

She again moaned into his mouth softly as they made out. They continued kissing, but had it become a little calmer - not so hard or firm - as it had slowed and became a more passionate kiss. Spencer nuzzled her neck softly, kissing and nipping while taking in her overly arousing scent. It was a pure drug of ecstasy.

Suddenly, a knock came to the front door and Spencer instantly let go of Scout - getting pushed back by her as she dropped to her feet.

"Delivery!"

The doctor groaned in frustration, pulling at his pants to conceal his hardened length and swung open the door. A lanky, pubescent teenager with a box of pizza gave him a shy smile, not being able to look him in the eye.

The poor kid must've heard everything.

"Here," Spencer dug out a bill from his pocket and grasped the pizza. "Keep the change."

He closed the door, flickering his eyes at the brunette who was silently chuckling, and practically threw the box onto the kitchen counter.

"Pizza for breakfast, Spence?"

The doctor shrugged and licked his lips, wanting to continue where they last left off. But now that he had a small chance to calm down, he recalled the nagging feeling in the back of his brain that bothered him.

"I never told you the truth."

Scout's face turned to confusion, "Truth? What are you talking about?"

"The real reason why I stayed up so late last night. It wasn't - because of some girl. Nor was it about a book."

"Spence, what is it?"

Silently, he grabbed her hand and lead her towards the hallway, stopping just outside the spare room he had.

The same spare room that was transformed into a nursery.

Scout's eyes widened, waiting for him to open the door but he didn't. Taking in a shaky breath, she grasped the handle and gently pushed it open.

The green mint walls were painted over to a crisp white coat. The wooden crib that she had picked out with JJ was gone and replaced by a desk. And all of the books that had been laying around were back in their rightful spot.

The brunette stepped into the room slowly, her blood feeling like it suddenly went cold in her veins. She stopped at the rocking chair, the one original item from the nursery that wasn't missing, and picked up the baby blue blanket that was neatly folded.

The chair had been a gift from Morgan and the blanket was from JJ, the two people they had picked to be godparents.

The miscarriage happened before Spencer and Scout got the chance to tell them.

She grasped the blanket tightly before walking quickly out of the room and towards the bedroom. Spencer sighed but didn't go after her.

Instead, he took one second to compose himself and steady his breathing. It was his job to comfort her and he couldn't do that while breaking down. He had to be the strong one.

Spencer entered the bedroom, seeing Scout sob mournfully into the pillows. Shutting the door, he quickly approached her, taking a seat by the side of her and gently rested his hand on her back, giving it a small rub for comfort.

"He's gone!" Growled Scout, having her tone of voice muffled by the pillow

"We didn't even get a chance to name our boy because it's all my fault!"

Spencer shook his head at Scout's sobs.

"No!" He stated firmly, "No, Scout! It's not your fault! How can you even say that?"

The young woman cried, turning her head away from the doctor and tightened her grip of the pillow.

"If I had just listened to you and stopped working then maybe -"

"Scout, no!" Spencer interjected, holding his tone so very firm.

"Look at me, Scout. Look at me!"

Scout continued her crying but slowly turned her attention to Spencer after his firm orders to do so. He had no idea what he was doing but his hand was wiping her tears away so very gently.

"None of this is your fault!"

He whispered, holding a fixed gaze to her eyes but still held that strictness to his voice.

"None of it, get that out of your head right now, Scout."

And after a few moments of nothing but her soft sobbing, Spencer slowly fixed his eyes to the floor while removing his hand from her face.

"It's like the doctor said," He sighed shamefully. "This is all my fault."

"Spencer, she never said -"

"No, I - I know this is down to me. You heard the doctor, the baby most likely died of a genetic disorder. My mother has schizophrenia and there's a mild chance that I have it too. It affects fertility, did you know that?"

Spencer shut his eyes, growling in anger at himself. And as Scout softly sobbed as she sat up, he suddenly felt a soft touch on his forearm. There was a large bruise that had formed this past week while apprehending an unsub on the BAU's most recent case.

It was a terrible shade of dark purple and puffy parts of his skin had changed to yellow. He fixed his attention to Scout as he sounded a slight hiss.

"Dose that hurt?" Scout question innocently, truly wondering the answer.

Shifting a little, he replied sounding uneased and frustrated, "It's a little uncomfortable, but give it time and it'll recover."

Scout gave a small nod and a sigh, holding her eyes to his injury as she traced her fingers so very delicately over it. Spencer shuddered slightly, seeing and feeling her eyes concentrate on him so deeply as she followed her fingers. They slowly made their way to his bicep and lightly ran down his gracious muscles.

Spencer slowly moved his hand to Scout's face, lightly wiping away the last of her tears as he held a fixed gaze on her eyes, seeing her looking at his body so continual and forcefully. The doctor slowly rubbed his thumb over her cheek as he cupped her face.

Spencer's heart fluttered intensely, seeing her eyes close softly as she pushed her face a little more into his hand with a slight sigh. He slowly caressed her cheek, moving his hand down to her neck while feeling her hand touch him gently. He moved in a little closer, feeling her hands begin to run roughly down his arms as their breathing slowly picked up in anticipation.

He leaned in and kissed her tentatively, only to have his breath caught when she kissed back. Scout moaned, giving him a firmer kiss that began to get faster and more hungrier. It following their breathing speed as the two kissed, setting into a mad kissing frenzy.

Spencer felt her arms wrap around the back of his neck and holding him closer. He began kissing down her chin as she lifted her head up, giving him better access while his hands set to taking off her top. Scout gasped, feeling his hands on her bare skin as he caressed her so gracefully. The sensual gasp that left her lips caused a more aroused feeling to develop within him.

The doctor began to unfasten the button and zip of her jeans and slowly laid her back as he pealed them from her. Already missing the kiss, Scout yanked him back down, kissing him hard and firm on the mouth. Spencer gently unclipped her bra and cupped her breasts in his hands, catching a sharp gasp from her and a groan from him.

Their breathing was running faster and more out of control as their minds were clustered and racing with questions, unable to hear the reasonable voice within and set on only one thing. With the softest and quietest breath, Scout held her eyes shut, releasing her lover's name in her breath.

"Spencer..."

He quickly tugged off his clothes and positioned her so that she was on all fours. Scout wriggled a bit, lifting her leg up coaxing him to move in closer and feeling he was right where she wanted him. She could feel his throbbing, rock hard, cock brushing against her wet slippery opening. She was so very wet. And so very warm.

Spencer shuddered pleasurably, nuzzling her neck and gently pressed kiss to it as he simply held back on penetrating her. He licked her neck, suddenly hearing Scout moan fast.

"Aww, Spence! Please, just do it! Push in hard!"

This position mesmerised the doctor and knowing she was happy with the position, he couldn't resist her now. Not that he had put up much of a fight but doing as Scout asked, Spencer lifted his arm over her and held her tight a moment before he firmly pushed in.

"AHhh..."

Scout's eyes winced, feeling the sudden force of invasion.

"Are you sure your ready for this, Love?" Softly murmured the doctor, nuzzling her neck and almost losing himself as he felt tipped inside her.

"We can stop - if that's what you want? We'll stop."

Scout whined fast trying to catch her breath, "Don't stop."

They were still a moment as he allowed her to adjust to his hard pleasure tool, which was something he hadn't thought of doing in a long time. Spencer felt her shift a bit, getting use to the size and when Scout felt what she was looking for, she mewed.

"Oh, that's it."

Spencer held Scout tight into him, shutting his eyes and gasped in a sudden catch of breath as she moved herself very slowly, getting the sexual intercourse going.

"Ah, God. Yeah, that's better." Softly encouraged the female.

Spencer kept with it, feeling himself go light and weak as pleasure began to surge through him. The doctor, growing more confident, got to his knees pulling his mate with him and still holding their sex position as he gripped her hips possessively; he began to stroke slowly into her, now that she was at his mercy.

Scout shuddered and gasped pleasurably as he took charge. He was loving and feeding off her whimpers of satisfaction. She could not help but shiver pleasurably, hearing his primal growls as he claimed her so tenderly and lovingly.

"AHHhh!"

A moan escaped her, encouraging Spencer to move himself slightly faster in and out of her, causing her to gasp aloud with each deep gentle thrust. Shivering himself as he slipped in and out of her tight, wet, warmth, Scout groaned out blissfully after a few moments of feeling his tender loving strokes.

"Ahh, Spence - Harder!"

Spencer gasped after releasing a build up of blissful groans with her moans and whimpers.

"No - I could hurt you."

"Ple... Please! Harder - Spence!"

Her plea of pain and pleasure caught Spencer, not knowing what to do as he groaned deeply from his throat. The two noise's from both Scout and Spencer mixed together in a passionate sound of love. The doctor hesitated in doing the force his lover asked for, or rather, begged for; he didn't want to hurt her and she was not in the right frame of mind to listen to what he had to say.

Her moans and demands made Spencer want to become deeper with in her. Hearing Scout sound the way she did with her exhilarating cries of blissful pleasure, it was all down to him and he couldn't hold back hearing her groans of ecstasy. Scout moaned out suddenly, breaking his small line of concentration.

"HARDER!"

She demanded gripping the bed sheet as she had been positioned on her hands and knees. Spencer got the message, loud and clear this time on her second demand and hesitated no more. He got a tighter hold of Scout, grabbing hold of her hips and slowed himself a few seconds, getting some build up then heard a sudden gasp from his mate as he forced himself harder in to the hilt.

Getting deeper inside her, the two winced their eyes, feeling a quick sharp feel of pain jolt through them vastly. It was followed by ultimate satisfaction as he continued to now pound into her warm silky wet, having a beautiful sounding of soft whimpering moans of pure satisfaction fill the room.

"AHH, GOD!"

Spencer growled pleasurably, only having him get faster and stroke harder. The sensation claimed her and feeling himself slipping in and out of his sweet, beautiful lover was blissfully powerful. Getting harder and faster now as he was feeling her coming close to her climax, the doctor pulled her back every time he pushed himself deeper inside of her, intensifying the utmost pleasure surging through them both.

"Spencer! AHHH GOD!"

Scout screamed out in pure raging satisfaction as he pulled her from the kneeling position to her back pressed against his chest. Her hand searched for the back of his as he held it against her abdomen, caressing it attentively while his other arm held round her chest, having his hand squeeze and tease her breasts and nipples. He possessively gripped her neck with his teeth, holding her completely at his mercy and powerful strokes. Scout could not get over how gloriously intense this all was, it was so hot and heady.

"AHhh!"

She whimpered, digging her nails into his wrist suddenly in an effort to grasp hold of whatever she could as her orgasm hit powerfully hard.

"AAHHHHhhhhh! FUCK ME, SPENCER!"

Scout belted out her roaring wave of ecstasy, not caring who heard her. Spencer caught his breath as he ejaculated his semen deep inside her awaiting womb, feeling her inner walls tightened round him, holding him for all he had.

"AHh, Spence!"

Scout groaned, loosing her grip of his wrist and flopped forward completely in content and unable to do anything else. She was totally limp and nothing more than a wither pool of blissful pleasure. Scout felt her lover as he eased himself from her, having the two releasing a soft moan of pleasure. Their breaths racing, hearts pounding, minds clustered, and bodies covered in perspiration. Spencer positioned her and himself on their sides as he laid down, gaining his breath back and feeling utter bliss as did she.

"You okay?"

He asked attentively, brushing back hair from her face before nuzzling her neck. Scout spoke in weak gasping breaths, trying to calm herself.

"Yeah, that was - I can't think of a word."

"Neither can I." Spencer mused as he gently scooped Scout's totally relaxed, limp self up to him and sighed contently in agreement.

The female snuggled in close to her lover, not passing up a second of not being held by those perfect, protective arms of his. Spencer nuzzled her again, taking in her glorious scent and the thick scent of their sex that had christened the air around them.

As Scout knocked out, she was completely unaware of the sounding buzz that came from her cellphone, still in the kitchen where she last left it.

GUESS WHAT?
I'M GOING ON INSTAGRAM LIVE!
follow my insta @emilyxsal

I'll posting book 2 while on live, will be doing a Q & A, and reading the first chapter before it goes on Wattpad! The date will be announced soon so just be on the the lookout.

Please consider voting/commenting if you like this story and want show your support for more content.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
I KNOW ITS JUST SMUT, IM SORRY
ITS NECESSARY I SWEAR

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