"please do not break my heart, I think it's had enough pain."

Text to; Eloise Abram Wherever you are, I hope you never forget what you did to me.

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HOSPITALS ARE INCREDIBLY DEPRESSING. With their way too white walls, ugly chairs and the smell of disinfectant filling every nook and cranny of the large building.

The sterile smell of the halls makes me nauseous, I can feel my stomach turning inside my body bit I keep walking. The main desk is now in clear sight.

"Paloma Arends, I'm here for Caroline Forbes." I gasp out, some breath lost on how fast I got here. The woman behind the desk seems nice enough, her worn out name tag says Lisa. She starts checking the system for Caroline, but before she has found anything I hear my aunt's voice.

"Lola" is all she can get out before I have jumped into her arms, hugging her tight. I can feel Liz' hot breath on my face, her face is sticky from tears.

"Come, we are all sitting over there."

Liz leads me to a small waiting area, there are old blue chairs standing in it, magazines that must be from 2002 decorate the small tables.

Sitting on those bleak chairs are people I used to know, familiar faces I can't quite place anywhere.

Liz starts introducing faces, pointing at them as she says their names.

"Lola, these are Elena, Matt and Bonnie. I think you guys used to play together when you were young." I scan their faces. They look tired, strung out.

The guy who Liz said was called Matt is the first one to approach me. He places a hand in mine.

"Hey I'm Matt, nice to meet you Paloma." He says this with a heavy voice and bags under his eyes. He is sad but he is still trying to be nice, I can appreciate that.

"It's just Lola." I smile and he smiles back. This blonde haired boy in all his innocence and glory.

He leaves immediately after the introduction, tells Liz to call him if there are any developments.

The two girls who are still left in the room go in for the hug in stead of the more formal introduction. Their clammy skin covers mine and I start to remember who they are, thoughts of suburban roads and play castles fill up my mind. They smell like incense and hospital equipment.

I try to look through the window but blue curtains obstruct my view.

"How is she doing?" I stutter out the question because I'm not sure if I want to hear the answer.

When I do look around I see their faces. They look hopeless, like everything is done for.

Bonnie touches my shoulder softly and a light shock goes through my body, she must have been walking on carpet before. "They aren't sure if she'll make it." She whispers it out, because saying it too loudly would make it too real.

Those few words, even in their whispered form, have more of an impact than you could ever imagine. I let myself fall onto one of the light blue chairs, I hear the legs scrape over the floor and one of the arms seems to punch into my ribs. Sobs start escaping my pink lips and I can taste my own salty tears on my tongue.

A man's voice interrupt my sorrows, however. It is deep and raspy, infused with an edge of danger.

I look up at the man and all I see is beauty. Sleek black hair, a perfectly sculpted face, like the gods themselves produced him out of marble.

"And who is this Liz?" His eyes are miracles of their own.  Blue like a deep well of water that echoes your words back to you. Your desires.

When he looks at me, too, he arches an eyebrow.

"Lola?" I hear my name and every muscle in my body freezes, how does he know it? I look back at him, my head turned like a dog's, confused. His lips are puckered.

"Lorelei?" He repeats himself, as if expecting an answer from me. I want to scream, yes I am Lola, but no I am not Lorelei. This chair keeps on digging into the muscles of my back.

Luckily, Liz decides to speak for me, so I can continue biting my tongue.

"Damon, this is my niece Paloma. She goes by Lola."  The man, now known to me a Damon, nods.

"I must have confused you for someone else, my apologies."  When he walks towards me he does so with confidence, big strides that make him look like he is floating, almost. He grabs my hand and lifts it to his face, laying a gentle kiss onto it.

"Damon Salvatore." Another shock goes through my body, the same intensity as when Bonnie touched me when he says his last name.

"Paloma Cecilia Arends, nice to meet you Damon." It comes out in an even higher pitch than my normal voice, this man makes me nervous. The girls are talking to Liz and it feels like Damon and I have entered this little bubble, and I don't know whether I should be afraid or not.

"Nice to meet you too, Paloma. But there is some business to do and I don't think you're ready yet."

I can see Elena and Bonnie behind him, keeping watch over me while talking to Liz. Their eyes roll.

Damon touches my face, gently caressing my jawline and looks deep into my eyes. He looks stern, like a school teacher giving out detention.

"You feel hungry, you are going to get something to eat at the cafeteria, you'll come back later."

Something flows through me when he looks at me like that, like we both know something the other doesn't. And even when I feel myself wanting to deny what he says, I am unable to.

"Hey, I'm going to get something to eat. Anyone else want something?" They all shake their heads.

When I return my belly is way too full. I wasn't even hungry in the first place, so stuffing myself full of vending machine food probably wasn't the best decision. Or I guess I ate vending machine food, I don't remember much before I came back here, it must be the stress messing with my head.

There is only one person left on the uncomfortable chairs, the blonde boy from earlier. His name was Matt if I recall correctly. He is half asleep, nodding his head up and down, there is a bottle of water in his left hand that he is about to lose his grip on. I take it out of his hand carefully.

"Hey Matt, I'll wake you up if anything changes okay? Get some sleep." He nods off before I can finish my sentence. We change sleep shifts through the night.

"Lola come on!" someone is excitedly tugging on my shoulder when I come to. When I open my eyes I am confronted by a sea of blue, Matt. "What is it?" I ask, rubbing my eyes vigorously, my voice is still groggy from sleep and my brain still confused from, well everything.

"You have to see this, trust me." And I do trust him, I follow him through the wall into a room with harsh fluorescent lights. I hear her before I ever see her.

"Lolly!" Caroline's voice is high as always, but more shrill than normal. Her blonde locks are somehow still in perfect shape, her laugh is brighter than I could even remember. I run for the hospital bed containing the frail, small girl and embrace her. Fully and wholeheartedly.

"Ouch! I'm not on my full strength yet Lols." I let go of her as fast as I can, removing the pressure from my cousin's body.

"It's good to see you Care." I can feel a lone tear welling up, but I keep it contained.

"Yes I know, I'm pretty amazing. Did you know hospitals stream Jersey Shore?" I want to be bitter. Say, yes I did know that hospitals stream Jersey Shore, it's all I watched for about three months and I could probably tell you exactly what happens this episode. Where were you when I was close to death? I don't remember you sitting by my bedside.  I don't. Instead, I simply smile.

I am sitting in a chair, carefully avoiding the tubes and wires leading to Caroline's body when the door opens again and Bonnie Bennet comes marching in.

Caroline points to the television before Bonnie can speak, "Jersey Shore is on."

Bonnie falls into Caroline, but she lets out an uncomfortable moan so she lets go almost immediately.

"Careful, still a little sore."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, they say I'm healing quickly."

Matt interrupts the two friends with his own plan, "My turn" he says and slowly leans in to kiss his girlfriend lovingly. I swear to God, I could see her smile through the back of his head.

"Oh isn't he the cutest!" She turns to Bonnie who is quietly sniffling away, "why are you crying?"

"I'm just really happy you're okay." Bonnie's hand is in front of her face, a nail between her teeth.

"Oh, I love you guys so much."

"And we love you Care," I say before hugging my cousin carefully. Soon all three of us are hugging the girl.  I know I'm not part of this love yet, but I could be and that's what I decide to focus on.