group: dead, but only ironically

luminecool: TIME 2 SING

luminecool: IM KISSAPHOBIC DONT WANNA GET TOO CLOSE TO U

barbietoes: UR MOUTH IS A HURRICANE SOMETHING SWEET BEFORE THE PAIIN

barbietoes: IM KISSAPHOBIC THAT BODY DONT WANNA HOLD IT NO (im underage)

keqing: YOU'LL LOOSEN YOUR DRESS YOU'LL PULL AT MY NECK AND WE'LL BREAK WHAT CANT BE BROKEN

luminecool: THROWING THE CABERNET BACK

luminecool: IN A BRIGHT BLUE CADILLAC

voltronsurvivor: UR MARILYN MONROE

voltronsurvior: AND I AM JAMES DEANS HEART ATTACK

voltronsurvivor: SPIN ME AROUND KEEP ME SPINNING AROUND

officiallyfischl: what song is this i want to participate

barbara!!: SWAYING TO THE BAND

keqing: YOUR FINGERS ARE QUIVERING EXCEPT WHEN YOURE SHIVERING

keqing: I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAAAND

luminecool: BUT IM KISSAPHOBIC DONT WANNA GET TOO CLOSE TO YOU

officiallyfischl: what is the song name omfg

barbietoes: YOUR MOUTH IS A HURRICAAANE

barbietoes: YOULL DROWN ME IN THE RAIN

ajaxtartagliachilde: SHOUTING CURSES AT URSA MINOR AS YOU BECKON ME TO THE COVERS

aethercool: ITS CUTE WHEN U DO IT BUT CUPID IS STUPID HE SHOT THE WRONG LOOOOVERRSSS

luminecool: THROWING THE CABERNET BACK

barbara!!: IN A BRIGHT BLUE CADILLAC

officiallyfischl: does everyone know this song except me

imbennett: no i have no clue whats going on either

aethercool: YOURE MARILYN MONROE

luminecool: AND I AM JAMES DEANS HEART ATTACK

barbietoes: SPIN ME AROUND KEEP ME SPINNING AROUND

barbietoes: SWAYING TO THE BAND

noelle=): YOUR FINGERS ARE QUIVERING EXCEPT WHEN YOURE SHIVERING I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAAAAND

generalgorou: YOU SAID TAKE THE CHAAAAAANCE

generalgorou: take the chaaaance (take the chance take the chance take the chance)

generalgorou: I WANNA HOLD UR HAAAAAAANNND

barbietoes: BUT III CANT GET TOO CLOSE TO U MY DARLING CANT GET TOO CLOOOOSE

luminecool: AND GOD HELP ME IF I DO YOULL LEAVE ME BROKENHEARTED YOULL LEAVE ME ...

luminecool: STITCHING MY LIPS UP AGAIN EVERYBODY NOW IIIIII CANT GET TOO CLOSE TO YOU MY DARLING

ssayanfei: CANT GET TOO CLOSE NO NO NO NO

keqing: GOD HELP ME IF I DO YOULL LEAVE ME BROKEN HEARTED YOULL LEAVE ME LONELY AT BEST (LONELY AT BEST) III CANT GET TOO CLOSE

ganyu: LONELY LONELY LONELY LONELY AT BEST

generalgorou: III CANT GET TOO CLOSE (I WANNA HOLD UR HAAAAAND)

luminecool: BUT IM KISSAPHOBIC

luminecool: DONT WANNA GET TOO CLOSE TO U

voltronsurvior: UR MOUTH IS A HURRICAAANE

aethercool: U DO THIS A LOT NOW DONT U BABYYY

luminecool: so proud of all of us for understanding the assignment. except venti because why tf did u need to clarify that ur underage

barbietoes: it's called COMEDIC VALUE gosh lumine

dilucragnvindr: Do I even want to know what just happened

officiallyfischl: can someone just tell me the song name or is this another one of albedo's originals

luminecool: wdym another r u telling me albedo resident hot genius kreideprinz can also write songs and/or sing?????????????

officiallyfischl: i think you all are stupid

ssayanfei: albedo can draw, write, sing, play the bass, code, hack, and a bunch of science stuff but i failed chem so dont ask me to elaborate lol

generalgorou: ong that man is barbie

albedooo: wtf

generalgorou: oh hey

generalgorou: what's next kreideprinz are u tik tok famous or something?????

albedooo: yes actually

generalgorou: bye guys i'm gonna go actually set the bathrooms on fire

luminecool: gorou shut up u literally have a viral tik tok abt ur boyfriend

generalgorou: that doesn't count as fame he's super hot so obviously it was gonna go viral

ssayanfei: gorou has a boyfriend?? time to do some stalking

luminecool: i only know this because of tik tok

ssayanfei: interesting. please dm me with more info so i can resolve this issue!

luminecool: okay sure just stop talking like how brands dm people on twitter

officiallyfischl: based on that reaction that was not an albedo song. so tell me the name or i'm unleashing my cranky ass bird

barbietoes: ass bird

officiallyfischl: i'm gonna kill you venti barbatos

xiao.: kissaphobic by make out monday

officiallyfischl: thanks for actually answering xiao

xiao.: yw

luminecool: xiao wtf u shouldve joined

xiao.: i was in the shower give me a break

xiao.: kinda shocked that barbara knew the song but fischl didn't

officiallyfischl: i don't listen to music

barbietoes: @kaeyaalberich that's her right there officer

kaeyaalberich: I'm not an officer and I can't arrest Fischl for not liking music

kaeyaalberich: Even though I really want to

generalgorou: i still wanna know why the mega innocent barbara knows that song

Jean!: She's not as innocent as she portrays herself.

barbara!!: i run a blackmail ring full of creepy dudes who won't leave me alone. albedo helps

albedooo: yeah lol

voltronsurvivor: that's kinda girlboss of u barbs

barbara!!: gaslight gatekeep girlboss i guess

voltronsurvivor: PLEASE

xiao.: i like how i added scaramouche and he's said two things

ajaxtartagliachilde: let's keep it that way

scaramouche: hello tartaglia.

ajaxtartagliachilde: NO NO NO NONONNONONO NO ABSOLUTELY NEVER AGAIN

scaramouche: too late i'm bffs with xiao so you can't get rid of me

xiao.: now hold on when did i ever say that. back tf up

barbietoes: boutta chase this man away w my fat horses step away from my bf(f)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

officiallyfischl: hm.

ajaxtartagliachilde: rip to my homie xiao hes not dead hes just still in the bestiezone

xiao.: i'm literally not

ajaxtartagliachilde: WHATGSV

barbietoes: my horses like him so we r officially legally wed

aethercool: ugh finally

officiallyfischl: gorou are you vaping in the bathrooms again.

generalgorou: no wtf im literally in class

officiallyfischl: okay well somebody is.

generalgorou: yeah and its not me this time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aethercool:

aethercool: when bae hates oatmeal

barbietoes: IM BAE AND I DO IN FACT HATE OATMEAL AND IN FACT THAT WAS VERY UNNNESCASERY THANK YOU

aethercool: im eating it right now !!!! how does that make u feel oven!!!!!

barbietoes: I AM ENRAGED IN A WAY THAT I CANNOT PUT INTO WORDS

barbietoes: whew stay calm, cool, and collected venti. if needed stop, drop, and roll

xiao.: i hate you actually

barbietoes: i love u shawty

xiao.: i would say i love you too but you called me shawty so no

barbietoes: WAIT NO SHAWTY IM SORRY

aethercool: i am so homophobic

luminecool: aether you literally Like Men

aethercool: and

aethercool: she went offline bcs im right

Jean!: Or because she's in class like the rest of you should be.

aethercool: HI JEAN BYE JEAN

aloynotahoy: i gruadyaed i don't count

Jean!: With that spelling you should probably come back

aloynotahoy:

xiao.: i am going to kill venti barbatos

barbietoes:

xiao.: no.

barbietoes: shawty pls it's so funny

xiao.: i am not your shawty i am your boyfriend

barbietoes: u can be both shawty!!!!!!

generalgorou: girl next to me in spanish just told me i look like an egirl and then asked if i am one. i had to politely explain that i am a Dude

voltronsurvivor: egirl is a mindset and it's one that im confident you have

generalgorou: absolutely not

voltronsurvivor: u literally v*pe shawty ur def an egirl

scaramouche: he's an eboy at best tbh. i have seen him one singular time btw

generalgorou: first dogboy now eboy what's next

voltronsurvivor: ur mom OOOHHHH

ssayanfei: gorou who asked you that question i have a hunch but i wanna know

generalgorou: uhhhh that astrology girl. idk i don't talk to her i don't believe in astrology

ssayanfei: mona megistus?

generalgorou: that's the one yeah

generalgorou: also æther can i add my bf pretty pretty pretty pretty please

aethercool: who the frick is æther

generalgorou: you shawty now say yes

aethercool: fine

ssayanfei: omg yay i need to know who this mystery man is

generalgorou added kazooha to "dead, but only ironically"

kazooha: same

aethercool: ARE YOU THE OTHER CELIAC KID WHO I BONDED WITH IN ART OVER BEING CELIAC??????

kazooha: YES LET'S GO CELIACS RISE UP

Jean!: Guys lol go to class. They're having me do random checks in classrooms and I don't want any of you to get in trouble

generalgorou: are u ...... the vice principal ......

Jean!: Yes, and I was aware of your bathroom habits before you joined this group. Now go to class or I'll actually do something about it

generalgorou: gotta blast guys bye everyone and bye kazuha ily !!!

ssayanfei: kazuha as in the kaedehara one?

kazooha: no the other kazuha😐

ssayanfei: okay im sensing some sarcasm so my bad ☹️ don't worry yanfei he can't hurt you if he can't eat bread

kazooha: homophobia ☹️

Jean!: Class.

ajaxtartagliachilde: what should us Cool Kids talk about while the children are in school

aloynotahoy: idk what do adults talk about. politics? the super bowl? football in general?

barbietoes: GO PATRIOTS!!!!!!

Jean!: Venti. Your class is first.

aloynotahoy: never seen a man go offline that fast

ajaxtartagliachilde: aloy i think we're the only adults here currently bc zhongli lisa and jean are working

albedooo: think again ginger. i'm 18 and not in class

aloynotahoy: may jean have mercy on your soul

Jean!: He has a free period right now, he doesn't count.

albedooo: eat my shorts aloy tartaglia

ajaxtartagliachilde: ugh i miss zhongli (and xiao i guess) this house is so boring when theyre not here

aloynotahoy: bruv lets go get wendys

ajaxtartagliachilde: bet im down

xiao.: childe do you actually even like me /j

ajaxtartagliachilde: ofc ur my emotional support stepchild

xiao.: nevermind forget i asked i literally even used a tone tag

aloynotahoy: why arent u in class huh xiao !!!!!!1

xiao.: it's lunchtime dumbass

aloynotahoy: oh lmao

kazooha: okay so who are you guys lmao

kazooha: i know gorou and aether. and maybe albedo?

generalgorou: albedo is the one who set the vet lab on fire along w sucrose

kazooha: oh i definitely know albedo

albedooo: most people do

voltronsurvivor: is albedo considered popular????????????????????????????

albedooo: yes and no and don't ask me to elaborate

voltronsurvior: okay then