seriously what is wrong with the ragnvindrs

group chat: ted bundt

barbietoes: im about to..... BARBECUE🥺

xiao.: ok

barbietoes: I'm sorry Janet but "ok" is rude! I don't like it... please do better. Anyways I'm putting the kiddos to bed so I can eat my fresh tómales!! 🤗 Care to join?

dilucragnvindr: "Tómales" ..................

aethercool: Hey Rebekah! I would love to! Send me your new address and I'll be there ASAP!🇲🇾 #MAGA

barbietoes: My address is 6322 SE Marinated Garlic Square. Please join me Janet.... I would love to discuss our dear president TURNIP! 🍊🇵🇷 #4moreyears

xiao.: i am uncomfortable with the energy we have created in the studio today

barbietoes: You coming Janet? I can't be up too late. The husband is out working... more wine for us! 🤗🍷

aethercool: venti i physically cannot do this anymore you're way too good at this are you secretly a soccer mom

barbietoes: probably

xiao.: 🏳️🌈Ladies, I saw this on my daughter's phone on my weekly phone check. What country flag is this? 🧐 I think we should send them pesky Libs there!

barbietoes: XIAO PLEASE

xiao.: that's my contribution enjoy

barbietoes: best possible contribution . kiss me /hj

luminecool: HALF??????????

ajaxtartagliachilde: down bad

aloynotahoy: oh shut up you are literally the last person i want to hear accusing others of being down bad

ajaxtartagliachilde: bye

keqing: rekt

keqing: also yanfei filled me in on who everyone is and i have seen each and every one of you do something weird in class/hallways/etc so i am afraid but i like this group

ssayanfei: sources have confirmed that childe tartaglia also did archery in highschool! quite the student athlete if you ask me! it has also been confirmed that aloy tartaglia was not only known for her relation to childe, but also for her acoustic guitar skills and voice! we have a pair of talented stepsiblings here!

aloynotahoy: SEE IM COOL

xiao.: you sound like a sports announcer

ssayanfei: that's the vibe i'm going for

luminecool: girl you sound like tmz😭

ssayanfei: THAT IS NOT THE VIBE IM GOING FOR

luminecool: ssayanfei news is the only news channel i can truly trust

ssayanfei: we take ourselves very seriously over here at SSAYanfei News! thanks for your feedback!

ssayanfei: this is my entire personality now

luminecool: as it should be

xingqiu: a second degree black belt just followed me on insta. u rlly wanna try that buddy boy?

dilucragnvindr: You're old enough for Instagram?

xingqiu: i am sixteen years of age diluc ragnvindr and i am also an ADVANCED PURPLE BELT do not test me you will regret it thank you

dilucragnvindr: I've never regretted anything in my entire life

kaeyaalberich: What about stealing my ninja turtles?????? Huh Diluc????? No regrets there either????

dilucragnvindr: No

kaeyaalberich: Say goodbye to your tooth enamel

aethercool: im gonna do everything possible to ignore that

Jean!: Aether I am literally still recovering from the toe necklace threat

aethercool: that wasnt a threat it was a gift smh my head

Jean!: Okay sure

aethercool: anyways yanfei keqing ningguang ganyu do ur intros

ssayanfei: i'm yanfei, 17, junior, and i know everything about everyone. all yalls secret crushes i know. mostly bc ur not slick but still. still don't know xiao's real name tho

xiao.: i'm not keeping it a secret or anything but i really just want you to figure it out on your own

ssayanfei: challenge accepted

keqing: keqing 17 junior and the theater kids keep trying to get me to audition for heathers

barbietoes: wait you should

keqing: silence, sophomore

barbietoes: GRUG

ganyu: i'm ganyu, age 16, i'm a junior, and my biggest flex is that i know more about certain people than yanfei does

ssayanfei: like zhongli...... i'm gonna be real with you i know nothing abt that man other than he's 21, works at a funeral parlor, is related to xiao somehow, and willingly proposed to childe knowing that would mean he's engaged to childe (personally i am concerned and think something is wrong because of this) /hj

xiao. took a screenshot!

xiao.: TEARS ARE ROLLING DOWN MY FACE

aloynotahoy: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHA

ajaxtartagliachilde: WHAT THE FRICK

Zhongli: I'm not sure how I'm supposed to respond to that, honestly.

xiao.: i literally can't breathe

barbietoes: AYO NINGGUANG GET IN HERE ITS UR TURN

aethercool: venti please i am so afraid of her

keqing: don't be lol she's not that scary

aethercool: of course you would say that ur friends w her and i am a small tiny little celiac sophomore boy !!! i am afraid !!!!

ningguang: ningguang 18 senior and i'm not scary i swear .... i've been lurking in this group and it's really funny. including the misspelling of ted bundy

Jean!: If anyone in here says the name ted bundy one more time I will write referrals for everyone in this group

Jean!: His name isn't capitalized because he doesn't deserve that respect

luminecool: pop off jean

voltronsurvivor: collective punishment is a war crime

ajaxtartagliachilde: i am terrified of you

voltronsurvivor: i am terrifed of your fiance

ajaxtartagliachilde: understandable im terrified of his kid

ssayanfei: BREAKING NEWS: ajax tartaglia has confirmed that zhongli's relation to xiao is father/son! who would've guessed!

aethercool: YOURE HIS KID???????

xiao.: i am NOT HIS KID I AM SIXTEEN HE IS TWENTY SIX HOW THE FRICK WOULD HE HAVE AN ENTIRE CHILD AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF TEN YEARS OLD

barbietoes: that happened to my buddy eric once

aethercool: i cant stand u venti

barbietoes: then sit down

ajaxtartagliachilde: ok ok ur basically his kid with the age difference of brothers

voltronsurvivor: i have something to say but im afraid of razor ....... bennett can u get ur wolfboy so i can make my comment

imbennett: yeah sure

voltronsurvivor: ok thanks

voltronsurvivor: shiro and keith

razor: I Will Remove All Of Your Teeth And Make Them Into A Bracelet And Give It To Jean

Jean!: PLEASE stop threatening to give me body part jewelry.

aethercool: im so sorry for starting this

chongyun: poor jean

aethercool: i forgot u existed

chongyun: thanks <3

voltronsurvivor: WHY DOES RAZOR ONLY SPEAK WHEN I MAKE A VOLTRON COMMENT

imbennett: he still feels attacked bc of what happened to adam

razor: :(

voltronsurvivor: completely understandable i just love how he gains the ability to type every time i mention vld

imbennett: oh thats not him he cant type but he was a vld fan

voltronsurvivor: WH

voltronsurvivor: WE HAVE A HACKER????

imbennett: yeah

barbietoes: omg this is just like criminal minds

xiao.: you're done. you're done.

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