group: dead, but only ironically

aethercool: one time venti got his tooth removed and sent me a picture of the detached tooth which for some reason the dentist let him keep in a bag

barbietoes: yeah lol it's still under my bed somewhere

xiao.: really reconsidering my life decisions right now

albedooo: how do you lose track of an entire bagged tooth

barbietoes: you forget to cherish it🥺

albedooo: okay sorry i asked

voltronsurivor: guys i rly think we should consider fischls idea of making dainsleif our main character. im in the cafeteria rn and he is also there and he's not even doing anything funny but he's just so entertaining to watch

officiallyfischl: i'm glad someone agrees with me

aethercool: give me ten good reasons and i'll make him our main character

voltronsurvivor: aether that is Too Many

officiallyfischl: one: his name is literally dainsleif. two: he's really hot. three: he's 6'2". four: he sounds like a grown up neil from camp camp. five: he sounds like pure vanilla cookie from cookie run kingdom. six: he has a really good fashion sense. seven: he has a really cool birthmark around his eye. eight: he's am orphan. nine: i watched him mix monster energy and coffee together once and drink it in ag class. ten: he was literally a missing person once like search party and everything. to sum it up, he's really cool and fun to watch. do i need to continue?

voltronsurvivor: i stand corrected i guess

officiallyfischl: eleven: he sounds like sasuke.

aethercool: okay wow good point i need to know more abt this guy

xiao.: childe there's a kid in my biology class who says he knows you because he was in elementary school with your siblings and you would play games with them and you all had nicknames. the kids would call you childe so you wouldn't be the only kid there. is this true

ajaxtartagliachilde: YEAH AJDGJDHjf

ssayanfei: childe nickname source reveal??????/ omg......

luminecool: i am in tears why would you keep that nickname

ajaxtartagliachilde: bc my siblings wont call me anything else now. except aloy but does she rly count

aloynotahoy: yes stepsiblings are still siblings you piece of cheese

ajaxtartagliachilde: I MEANT BC U NEVER CALLED ME CHILDE IN THE FIRST PLACE BC WE WERE ALMOST THE SAME AGE

aloynotahoy: OH JDGJEHJ

xiao.: kid says he went by balladeer and wants to know if you remember him

ajaxtartagliachilde: NO NO NO NO NO DO NOT HAVE ANY MORE CONVERSATIONS WITH THIS KID ABSOLUTELY NOT DO NOT SPEAK TO HIM EVER AGAIN I DO REMEMBER HIM

xiao. added scaramouche to "dead, but only ironically"

ajaxtartagliachilde: im not adopting u xiao.

xiao.: oh ouch

ajaxtartagliachilde: W AIT NO I WAS KIDDING

xiao.: i know. i just like torturing you

albedooo: the school vending machines are out of diet coke and i'm about to go a little crazy and start another accidental fire. except it'll be on purpose this time.

voltronsurvivor: chill shawty who even drinks that

albedooo: me tf

voltronsurvivor: nvm i forgot u had that thing .. the uh ... the sugar thing

albedooo: i'm not correcting you

scaramouche: are you the guy who set the vet lab on fire

albedooo: it was a joint effort between me and sucrose. are you the kid with the bowl cut

scaramouche: ITS NOT A BOWL CUT

aethercool: childe rly went offline. coward

ganyu: guys i just saw dainsleif in the hallway he dabbed me up

officiallyfischl: not fair i want dainsleif to dab me up

officiallyfischl: also which one of you is vaping in the bathroom on the third floor i can't tell if it's from the boys or girls because i'm standing outside of them but wtf

generalgorou: wtf why would u think it's one of us

officiallyfischl: is it you gorou

generalgorou: yeah lol

luminecool: did we not learn from albedo's mistakes ur gonna summon another fire truck

albedooo: first of all it wasn't just me. sucrose helped. second, vaping will not set anything on fire. worst case scenario he gets detention.

luminecool: okay whatever u say

ganyu: quick question does anyone else here have dietary restrictions? im bringing cupcakes to school tomorrow and im gonna give them to u guys at lunch but i know aether is celiac so i have to make gf ones. gotta know if theres any other accommodations

luminecool: hes crying

aethercool: THANJ YOU??????????????? UR SO NICE???????????

ganyu: np shawty i gotta make sure everyone gets a cupcake bc exams and stuff are happening. i'm taking everyone's lack of response as i don't need to make any more

aethercool: THANKS SHAWTY IM SO EXCITED

ganyu: ofc shawty

imbennett: razor and i got married last night!

kaeyaalberich: You're fifteen

imbennett: first of all you filthy orphan² i am sixteen years of age. second of all keep testing me like that and i'll transfer some of my bad luck over to you and we'll see how you enjoy organ failure. third of all mr. alberich, fischl literally officiated. take that

luminecool: ORPHAN² I AM IN TEARS

officiallyfischl: vouch. i literally officiated

razor: wedd ing

imbennett: went offline bc he couldnt take the heat

albedooo: he probably went offline because you called him an orphan²

kaeyaalberich: I went offline because I'm an adult with an adult job unlike you fetuses

imbennett: i can literally drive

kaeyaalberich: Can you even reach the pedals? You're like 4'11"

imbennett: I AM FIVE FOOT FOUR KAEYA ALBERICH

kaeyaalberich: Are you though?

imbennett: YES THEY MEASURED ME LAST WEEK

voltronsurvivor: omg benny and kaeya rivalry????????????????

imbennett: this is war kaeya orphan² alberich. sleep with one eye open because i'm gonna set your house on fire.

generalgorou: albedo and sucrose moment

barbara!!: oh shut up you were literally just vaping in the bathroom

generalgorou: UGH dont tattle on me barbs🤞

barbara!!: i literally don't care

albedooo: how many times am i gonna have to clarify that vaping won't set anything on fire

luminecool: why do u know this albedo

albedooo: because i have common sense

luminecool: oh lol cant relate

albedooo: i know.

aethercool: roasted

luminecool: i dont like u aether. anyways can we move on from gorou's vape addiction before i jump off the roof

generalgorou: my bad shawty

voltronsurvivor: guys can we add sucrose now i think shes prepared since albedo and amber are here

amberwantstofly added sucrose🍭 to "dead, but only ironically"

sucrose🍭 left "dead, but only ironically"

voltronsurvior: okay i guess not