"Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real." -Cormac McCarthy

'~-Amelia-~'

July 19th, 2017

JJ was already a genius at age four, almost five. She began to read at a sixth-grade level and showed signs of having the same eidetic memory as her father.

Jason, on the other hand, was average for his age. He was achieving A's and B's in school. However, Jason aspired to be a warrior like us. Of course, as soon as he turned thirteen, we allowed him to start training at the academy.

Crystal and Derek seemed to be slightly above average in school, but they were always neck and neck in any competition. They both were on the cross-country varsity team, with nearly identical times. At times, raising them felt like I was raising twins. Even in the academy, they were only a few places away from each other- and it had been that way since they joined. Now, Crystal was seventeen, and Derek was sixteen.

This year hadn't been kind to Spencer, as he dealt with being framed for murder by an unsub who was obsessed with him. Honestly, it was a long story that I didn't have time to fully understand. When Spencer was gone, my responsibilities doubled in number and size, which caused me to have multiple panic attacks. All I cared about was that now, Spencer was safe at home, taking care of his youngest daughter.

I reminisced the year as I left the house and headed off towards the academy, as I was teaching a group of fifteen-year-olds, which we called Milestones. I decided to take the scenic route, walking leisurely through the Crystal Forest. The trees swayed in the light breeze as I caught the scent of the morning dew that was sprinkled over the forest. The sun was rising steadily, peeking over the trees as the early morning came upon me.

Suddenly, a feeling washed over my body, making my bones ache. I could only describe this feeling as dread as I traveled through the trees. I wanted to ignore it, knowing that my anxiety disorder loved to act up whenever it felt like it, but the intensity of the feeling made me stop in my tracks. Surely, if I were at all like my mother, something bad was about to happen.

I swiftly picked up my phone and dialed my husband's number, to which he answered instantaneously.

"Hello, this is Doctor Spencer Reid. How may I help you?" I chuckled lightly at his greeting, knowing that he was at work.

"Hey, Sugar. I'm feeling anxious at the moment, so could you stay on the line for me?"

There was a momentary silence before he spoke again.

"Yes, of course, I will." I heard footsteps in the background. "Do you know what's causing the anxiety?"

"No, I have no clue. I know that I'm not anxious about teaching the Milestones or supervising the Dawns. It just feels random. But, it's so strong."

Silence followed my concerned voice.

"Do you think something might be happening at the academy?"

I shook my head, then realized that he couldn't see me. "No, it's not that. Actually, I think I-"

My scream was cut off by a gloved hand wrapping around my mouth. I tried to kick off my attacker, dropping my phone in the process. By the time I had remembered that I could use magic, a needle had been stuck into my throat, and the world flashed into a black screen.

'~-Spencer-~'

By the time I had exited the view of the cameras and teleported to Amelia's location, it had been too late. There Amelia's phone sat unlocked on the forest floor, not a dent or scratch disturbing its pristine surface. I trembled as I picked up the device, dialing Matt's number with it.

"Mimi?" He answered the phone.

"It's Spencer. Someone took her while she was on a call with me." I felt my whole body begin to shake from holding in my tears.

"Dammit, Amelia," Matt mumbled. "I'm at your house now. Meet me there." The phone beeped to signal that the call was over.

I gathered my thoughts only for a heartbeat before appearing inside of my house. There, Matt greeted me with a worried smile.

"Is something wrong?" JJ asked, her small voice splitting through the silence. She truly was my daughter- able to pick up on the smallest of tells already.

"Mommy's gone away for a little while. She'll be back soon." My youngest seemed to accept this answer.

"She's missing?" Crystal sounded broken at the news.

"Yes," I ran my hands through my hair. "She is."

Jason eyed me for a moment. "Do you even care?"

"Of course he does. Dad's stressed out of his mind! Don't you see his fists squeezing, his nail-biting, or even the way he messes with his hair?" Derek butted in, defending me before I had the chance to speak up. Jason hung his head in shame.

I began to flex my hands in odd patterns, hoping to alleviate some of the overwhelming anxiety that fogged my brain. Why did I have to go through this again?

"If you don't mind," Matt began, looking at the two oldest. "We could use your help in finding her."

They glanced at each other before nodding.

"Good. Let's go find Amelia. Hopefully, we'll be able to get this guy."

I started to play with my hands again. "I wish I could call my team in. I know that they could help us find her much quicker than we could by ourselves." Matt sighed, pulling me into a hug. We stayed there for a moment. I noticed small dampness on my shirt as he pulled away from me, sorrow encompassing his eyes.

As we appeared back at the Divine residence, I whispered in his ear.

"You're very strong, Matt. I want you to know that."

He looked at me gratefully.

"What if he does the same thing that the other one did?" I asked with a shaky voice.

"Then I'll rip his throat out," Matt stated simply, opening the door to his house."Let's just catch this son of a bitch."

'~-???-~'

September 7th, 2017

I quickly began to learn that this place was a living hell.

Xavier, or "Sir" as he made me call him, had beat me relentlessly, a sick grin plastered on his disgusting face as he did so. He did this every time I wouldn't follow his rules, or if I told him that my name wasn't "Maxine" or whatever.

He had put me in a revealing dress, which he loved to see on me. It really only made my dysphoria worse, and that made me less submissive, which he hated. Plus, the things he would do to me while I wore the dress- made my skin crawl just thinking about it.

I didn't know what my life was outside of this. The only thing that had hinted that I was not where I was supposed to be was his insistence that I would not be able to escape. This had filled my heart with sadness, thinking that there might be someone looking for me, and I didn't even remember them.

I hated it when he made me act like his housewife. It made my skin boil, and one time, I had even attacked him. I had overestimated how strong I was, however, so he beat me pretty badly.

While I was there, I had noticed three people in the back of my mind- as odd as it sounds. The one with long, black hair and heterochromatic eyes was reciting statistics about kidnappings (which confirmed my earlier theory), and the one with shorter black hair and scarlet eyes was trying her best to take care of a six-year-old, who said her name was Jesse. I wasn't sure who these people were, but sometimes, when our gazes met, I could tell that they needed me. That was what kept me going.

So, there I sat, curled up into a ball, feeling disgusting about myself. Though, I was slightly proud, as I had not cried once since I had been there. I wouldn't allow him the satisfaction. 

The air was cooler than it had been for the past few weeks, so I presumed that it was becoming winter soon. Xavier barged into my room, shooting me a death glare.

"Maxine." I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes. I didn't feel like getting beaten today.

"Yessir?" I practically vomited at my high-pitched voice.

"Why the hell is there-" He wasn't able to finish his sentence before a figure slammed him into the ground, a growl low in their throat. 

Now, I could clearly see it was a girl who was about sixteen years of age. Her short hair was mostly brown, with a patch of light blond in the front. She looked relieved at the sight of me.

Slowly, she lifted her hand towards the man. At the same time, a boy entered the room. He looked like he was around the same age as she was.

A bright flash of light stunned me as Xavier took his final breath. I looked up at the children, noticing the happiness that played behind their eyes.

"Mom," The girl breathed, stooping down to hug me. I guess that my face betrayed my confusion, as the girl reflected my expression.

"Have you guys come to save me?" I asked, my voice still higher-pitched.

They shared a worried glance. 

"Yes, we have." The boy spoke this time, holding out his hand for me to take. I hesitantly took it, lifting myself off the ground. I noticed that his hair was messy and dark circles hung under his eyelids.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

"You're asking me if I'm okay?" He shook his head with a laugh, leading me out the door of the house.

"What's your name?" Shock replaced his once calm features.

"She must be a new alter." The girl reassured him. "I'm Crystal, and this is my brother, Derek. Welcome to the Divinity System."

...What the hell is an alter?

'~-Spencer-~'

I glanced anxiously at the new alter. She seemed pretty beat up, but other than that, she glanced curiously at her new surroundings.

"What's your name?" I asked, resting my hand over hers.

She studied me for a few moments as if she were trying to decide whether or not I could be trusted.

"Maxine, I guess. That's what Xavier called me, anyway." I tried to give her a sympathetic look.

"You don't have to go by that, you know." She nodded, retracting her hand from mine.

"It's what I respond to." Maxine shrugged, combing her hands through her hair as if she were nervous. It perplexed me since the act of running your hands through your hair was often a trait shared by men. Though, I didn't judge- maybe she wasn't very feminine. I knew what it was like to be around a less feminine girl- i.e. Amelia.

"Well, I'm Spencer. I am married to four of the alters in the system, so you will be staying with me. Is that okay?" She nodded, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. "You can freely explore the house if you'd like. Oh- and you should meet Jason and JJ. They're your biological children."

She lingered there in front of me, avoiding eye contact. I wondered for a moment why she was just sitting there, but that's when I realized that she had probably been used to receiving orders from the guy who took her.

"You don't need my permission to do anything, Maxine. There are only a few system rules- and that's it." Maxine looked at me, confused.

"Normally, I would just tell you to ask the others, but in this case, I'll save you the trouble. No drinking, no smoking, and no one-night stands. That's it." Her eyebrows lifted in surprise.

"I'm allowed to leave the house?" She asked.

"It's your house, too," I responded, getting up from my seat. "Amelia is just careful about messing up her brain- that's all." She laughed at that.

"Amelia's the host, right?" I nodded. As Maxine began to explore her new home, something told me that she wasn't being completely honest with me. I ignored the feeling.

"Also, it's your birthday, so if your phone is receiving many notifications, don't blame me." A chuckle escaped from both of our lips.

"Hey, Spencer?" Maxine called from the other side of the room. "Thank you."

"Of course. I'm just glad you're home. You belong here."

"Perhaps love is a minor madness. And as with madness, it's unendurable alone. The one person who can relieve us is of course the sole person we cannot go to: the one we love. So instead we seek out allies, even among strangers and wives, fellow patients who, if they can't touch the edge of our particular sorrow, have felt something that cuts nearly as deep." -Andrew Sean Greer