Just What I Needed (60)

- Just so everyone knows, I posted Seth's story, it's on my profile under About A Girl! -



Pacing back and forth, Keely crossed her arms tightly in front of her chest, chewing on her lip anxiously.


The air felt rather constricted in her throat, and her heart was beating too quickly against her chest. Love. There was no way she was in love with anyone. Maybe there were different degrees of love, because she was sure in the first boyfriend way she had loved Tony in some way.


It didn’t bother her as much anymore, the cheating and the fights, with him. She was just certain that she had no feelings for him, he was just a big mistake that most girls had to make at one point it seemed. He was nothing more than a person that she’d be willing to be friends with if she ever saw him again.


Yet she couldn’t say when it had happened, when she’d finally absolutely forgiven him for everything. Because she couldn’t pinpoint a moment when the change had come, it had been a huge insecurity for her and now it was just… gone.


And the thought didn’t even bother her much.


It was Colton assuming that she was in love with Seth that had her in such a worried mess of a person.


Because she was a mess. Keely was just short of trembling as she paced, thinking about what was said and what truly was. Yet her thoughts were racing around her head so fast she couldn’t make sense of them, just getting a jumbled mess of contradicting thoughts. She knew what she felt for Seth was different from anything she’d ever felt before, but if she was in love, she would know before anyone else.


Anyways, loving him would be impossible. Well, not impossible, but it could only end in someone being very hurt. And that someone would be her. Because as much as she wanted to believe she meant something more than the friend that had forced him to tell her about the past, that was all she thought was a rational assumption.


Groaning in frustration, she tugged on her hair lightly, her thoughts almost making her dizzy from the speed.


If only she had someone who she could lay all the thoughts out with, just pour everything out and get unbiased advice. Maybe not unbiased, but she just needed a friend that she could talk this over with.


Her first thought of who she could talk to would be Seth, but that was pointless since he was the one she needed to talk about. Then there were Colton and Marco, but they were Seth’s best friends first and foremost. There was Marissa, but Keely didn’t know if she could talk about something like that with her, let alone over the phone. Jenny, but the same problems that applied to Marissa were current there, their bond just wasn’t strong enough for her to be able to pour out her soul.


Of course, there was always Joseph, she could talk to him about anything. Yet, she couldn’t speak to him comfortably about boys. Because whenever she spoke to him about Tony, his only response was assuring her that he would punch the other guy in the face. She could talk to him about everything except boys.


But there was Haley.


If she was to talk to anyone about a boy, she could speak to Haley. It didn’t matter that it was over the phone, it was her best girl friend.


Hesitating for just a moment, Keely stared absently at the wall. She was supposed to be at the party Maureen had ordered her to go to over two hours ago and even if she left right now she would maybe make it for her set. Not to mention she wasn’t even dressed in the gorgeous silky dress that was laid across her bed.


In fact, she wasn’t even close to being ready to go to this party. Instead her hair was mused from countless times of her running her hands through it in frustration, she was wearing a pair of worn in ripped jeans and a white Rolling Stones shirt. To say she was a mess was beginning to seem like an understatement.


“Oh, fuck it,” she muttered, lunging across the bed in order to snatch up her cellphone that she’d left on the end table.


Hurriedly pushing up from the most familiar bed besides the one in the bus, Keely ran a hand through her hair as she quickly found Haley’s cell number. Feeling her stomach jerking in nerves of what she needed to speak about, she began to pace back and forth again, listening to the dial tone.


An absent voice finally broke through the third tone, making Keely’s stomach jump to her throat. “Hello?”


“Hales?” she questioned with a sigh of relief.


“Oh, it’s you,” replied Haley in a manner that made Keely blink in confusion. “What do you want?”


In her surprise she had pulled up to a halt, her mouth opening and closing soundlessly. She’d never heard her best friend so coldly to her in their entire friendship. Hadn’t she just spoken to her a week before? “Um,” she started, “I just kind of wanted-”


“You want something? That’s so surprising,” Haley interrupted, her voice dripping in sarcasm.


Before she could stop herself, Keely snapped, “What’s that supposed to mean?”


“Nothing, nothing at all,” she threw back snidely.


For a moment Keely just closed her eyes, gritting her teeth together as she clenched her hand around the phone. Attempting to calm herself down, she let out a slow breath.


What did Haley like to talk about? With the thought in mind she reopened her eyes, looking to the dress spread across the bed, the dark green folds rippling prettily beneath the light. “I was given a dress today,” she said abruptly. What more did Haley like than clothes? “It’s gorgeous, I think it’s a design by–”


Once again she cut in, not allowing Keely to finish. “And I’m supposed to care about this, why?”


“I don’t know,” Keely returned stiffly, grinding her teeth together as she began to pace again. “I thought you liked that stuff and I was trying to talk to you.”


“That’s new.”


Clamping her hand together tightly, she began to tap it restlessly against her jean clad leg. “What are you going on about now?” This time she didn’t try to reign her annoyance back in, she’d never been a very reasonable person anyways, her temper was characteristically easy to trigger. Plus this moment in time wasn’t the best for an argument when her emotions were already all over because of Seth.


“Well you haven’t called much since you moved, have you?”


She retorted bitingly, “You never called me either!”


“I called you at Christmas!” Haley exclaimed.


“And I called you back a few days ago, you didn’t answer!”


There was a pause when Keely heard the other girl take in a shaky breath, and for a moment she wondered if they were both overreacting. Yet Haley’s next words had the thoughts fleeing once and for all from her mind.


“You didn’t try very hard to get a hold of me, did you?” she put in nastily, her voice seeming tighter than usual.


“I was recording a freaking album! Shit Haley,” she swore out of pure frustration. “I barely had time to sleep that week let alone call you every five minutes until you decided maybe I’ll talk to my best friend! You could’ve called me back.”


“Because I wanted to talk to you.”


Feeling anger well up dangerously in her stomach, Keely ran an aggravated hand through her hair. “You going to make your mind? You’re mad because I haven’t been calling you but you don’t want to talk to me. What the hell is wrong with you?”


“What’s wrong with me?” cried out Haley, “What about you? Your father doesn’t even want you. I think you’re the common element there.”


Immediately she froze in her spot, feeling the warmth flood from her cheeks as she paled. “What?” she whispered.


“And you didn’t even know!” the other girl shouted loudly, making Keely wince at the sudden explosion of the shrill voice. “You’re never going to know because you’re too fucking blind and stupid to see what’s right in front–”


“You know what?” she interrupted, yelling as well by that time, “Go to hell.”


Furiously Keely hung up, throwing her phone with all her might away from her. But it made little to no effect as it landed on the plush blankets on her mattress.


Feeling somewhere dangerously close to bursting into tears and a stream of curses at the same time, Keely turned away, her heart racing as her chest heaved up and down as if she’d just ran a marathon. When her breathing started becoming hitched and ragged, she bit her lips close together while pressing her fingers against her forehead and burying her face in her hands.


Sure she and Haley had fought before, it would be impossible to be friends for as long as they’d been without the occasional fight. But it hadn’t been blow outs like that before. And she’d never have dreamed Haley would say something like that, telling her that he father had never wanted her all along.


Was she just saying that to hurt her because she was angry or was it the truth? Keely wouldn’t believe that something that important would have just slipped over her head, but she also had never been very observant when it came to the people around her, just music. But if it was the truth, it did make sense… why else would her father had been so willing to let her go? Maybe he hadn’t been angry, just relieved that she was leaving and didn’t have to deal with her anymore. She did have to remind him of her mother, no matter the differences between them, she did look like Brooke and then there was the music.


But he called her at Christmas, he wouldn’t have done that if he’d never wanted her around, right?


Even the reassuring thought couldn’t break through Keely’s insecurities enough to block out everything else and ended being swallowed by the new thoughts swirling around in her mind.


However, even if it was true, how could one of her best friends say that to her?


Feeling the rage rise up more powerfully than the sadness again, she scowled as she ripped her hands away from her face. She wasn’t going to hide in her hotel room and start crying because her friend was being a bitch.


Spinning around on her heel, Keely snagged her black leather jacket from where it was slung over the askew chair beside the desk. And she was shrugging it on by the time she rushed down the stairs, her feet moving for once gracefully down the stairs as she hurried up.


Finding herself in the elevator with three other people who looked more casual than she, Keely shrunk towards the back of the small little room. Feeling suddenly self-conscious, she stuck her hands into the pockets of the jacket, looking pointedly forward. But when she did so, her hand brushed the pair of sunglasses she’d bought just the few days before at the airport in Green Bay.


When she pulled them out, for a beat she just stared down at the dark wayfarers in her hand considering. Sure, there was no one she wouldn’t mock for wearing sunglasses inside and especially at night. Yet she was also very aware that her eyes were still red rimmed from the crying she’d been doing over the past few days, hopefully the puffiness had gone down by now. As well as being more than aware that this party would have paparazzi out front flashing photos of whoever went in. And she didn’t want Haley to happen to see one of the photos on the off chance.


Her back straightening at the thought, Keely just shoved the sunglasses onto her face, shoving her hand through her hair once again.


Rushing through the lobby before Mr Englis could say anything at all, she hopped down the front steps and threw herself into the black car that was waiting at the front of the hotel. Giving a deep sigh, she pulled the door closed behind her and leaned back in the seat.


“You’ve made me wait here for two hours.”


At the sound of the voice, Keely jolted upwards and looked to where Dave sat in the front seat, suddenly thankful for the sunglasses.


“I know, I’m sorry,” she began apologetically as she pushed forward to the edge of the seat. “I was trying to figure something out and, well… it didn’t quite work out.”


For a moment their tour bus driver stared at her in the rear view mirror, his eyes lingering on her for just too long. Feeling her brows draw together, Keely couldn’t help but wonder what he was looking at. Yet before she could ask, he announced, “Alright then. Well, let’s get going before you miss your own set.”


While the car pulled forward smoothly, she leaned back in the seat, resting her head on the back and closed her eyes. Her heart was pounding a bit too fast still, but she took deep breaths in and out on the drive, trying to calm herself down.


“Get going, rock star,” proclaimed Dave, speaking his first words since the start of the drive.


Her eyes flying open, she shoved upwards once again. “Thanks,” she murmured, flashing him the best smile she could work up before putting her hand on the door handle. She could already see the flash of cameras from the photographers piled outside. Giving another thanks for the sunglasses, she dragged in one last calming breath before pushing out of the car and straightening herself.


Focusing so she wouldn’t be confused by the bustle going around everywhere around her, she looked at the doors that were only a little while down the drive. The flashing was distracting but at least the dark glasses dulled them from being blinding, the yelling of questions were rather diverting as well, but those were easier to ignore.


When she finally reached the doors, she was stopped by the person dressed in the cliché all black, but at least they weren’t built like a wall. In fact, it was a she instead of a he, and she was rather tall and wiry looking.


“I’m Keely Staub,” she said, tipping her chin back so she could look at her. At another time she might have been a bit nervous by this, after all, she wasn’t exactly well known. Yet at the moment her blood was still thrumming from the fight with Haley.


She eyed her before saying, “I was told I needed to check you.”


Keely’s eyes narrowed and she snapped, “What for?”


“Drugs,” she answered dully, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.


Her mouth dropped open slightly as she stared incredulous. Had those rumors really have gotten this bad?


“Fine,” she snarled abruptly, her ears filling with white noise. Even though it was freezing outside, Keely tore off her jacket, handing it over to the woman which left her standing in the frigid air in just the tee shirt.


When the search was over and she was still scowling, Keely seized her leather jacket back and stalked past the woman, pushing in through the doors. Without looking around at the party that she could hear from the steady thrum of conversation and soft elevator music playing, she just shrugged the jacket back on before looking up.


And that had her freezing in place as she gazed about.


She’d forgotten to get into the dress before she’d run out of the hotel. Everyone in the room looked sleek and polished. Wincing, Keely touched a hand to her hair. She hadn’t done anything with it. It looked just like it did when she went on stage, with the waves in a messy way framing her face, she didn’t even have a solid part in her hair from the multiple times she’d ran her hand through her hair.


As if her realization needed to be reinforced, her head whipped to the side as a voice hissed beside her. “What are you wearing?”


Grimacing Keely shoved her hands into the pocket of the torn jeans, she couldn’t even meet Maureen’s eyes as she stared sheepishly at the ground. “I forgot…” she trailed embarrassedly, shifting from one foot to the other.


Abruptly Maureen just threw her arms in the air, the motion catching Keely’s eyes. “I don’t know what to do with you sometimes!”


Not knowing what else to say, she gave a shrug.


Sighing, Maureen pointed towards the stage close to the bar. “Go on, your band is going to be up next.”


Nodding hastily Keely fled, not wanting to be chastised even more for the day. She felt like an idiot already. Yet before she could reach the side of the stage where she could see her back up band waiting, her path was interrupted when a person stepped in front of her.


“Keely!” he exclaimed, leaning forward to kiss her on the cheek. “It feels like I haven’t seen you in forever.”


Instantly at the touch she stiffened, but her eyes widened disbelievingly as she stared at the guy she remembered as Edward Lorry with his perfectly styled blonde hair and the smooth suit. Not only had she only met him twice and he was acting as if they were great old friend, but did she really expect her to greet him warmly? Did he not remember the fact that he’d been the one to cheat with Rachael on Seth?


Well, she knew by now that Seth really hadn’t cared at all about the girl, but there was a strong loyalty in her.


Blankly Keely reached a hand up, touching her cheek where he had pressed the kiss to her cheek. “Uh… hi?” she said awkwardly. “And, well, I think the last time I saw you was at the NSR record release party, that’s months now.”


“Well, it’s really good to see you,” he told her. With his words he took her hands in his amiably, sending her a smile with twinkling blue eyes that she supposed could be charming, but really she preferred that crooked grin that Seth would send her. Not to mention what she thought of the rare dimpled smiles. She even preferred those sarcastic smirks that Seth had over anything Edward did.


Sending him an uncomfortable forced smile, Keely tugged her hands out of his, feeling awkward in the cold grasp. She opened her mouth to reply politely, but before she could speak, a voice sounded from beside her.


“I think she’s had enough, Lorry.”


Immediately she spun around, her neck cricking from the hasty motion when she heard Seth’s voice.


Edward said that it felt like forever since they’d seen each other, but Keely disagreed. It felt like forever since she’d heard Seth’s voice and it had been mere days. It was enough to send shivers up her spine.


She couldn’t help but gulp nervously as she stared at him. Saying he looked good was an understatement, but when did he ever look anything but sexy? Instead of a suit like most of the guys at the party had opted for, he was wearing a black sweater that showed off his muscled but lean chest nicely even if it wasn’t clinging, straight legged black jeans with a black belt that had a plain buckle and black pull on sneakers, she could just see the stripe of white of the shirt he was wearing beneath the black sweater. The fact that he was standing very close to her had her side tingling as she stared up at him, taking in the familiarly shadowed eyes even if he looked far from tired at the moment and the black hair that no brush would dare tame.


Yet his eyes that were a hard golden hazel at the moment didn’t even flicker her way, they were fastened tightly on the shorter Edward that was still standing in front of them. Seth had his arm crossed over his chest, the sweater shoved up to his elbows. The body language wasn’t exactly friendly.


“Seth,” said Edward, nodding stiffly in his direction as he stared back, acknowledging his presence.


Suddenly Seth smirked, taking half a step forward as if it was the most relaxed thing he’d done all day, but his shoulders were rigid with tension. “What?” he asked, wearing that sarcastic smirk she’d been thinking of moments before, “No kiss for me?”


Edward’s eyes narrowed on him, but all his said was, “I’ll see you guys around,” before wisely walking away.


Swallowing even though her throat was dry, Keely shoved her hands in her pockets while he stepped forward, taking Edward’s place where he’d been standing in front of her. This time she didn’t know what to do either, so she landed on the same greeting of, “Uh… hi?”


But his face didn’t break into the familiar grin she was used to seeing whenever he caught sight of her, instead it was in that old scowl that hadn’t been focused on he for a long time. “Why are you wearing sunglasses inside?”


At his question, she blinked stupidly. But then she remembered. “Oh, shit,” she muttered, pulling them off hastily and shoving them into her pocket. Maybe there were still photographers inside, but she didn’t want to look like more of an idiot plus the lighting was better, hopefully no one would notice.


Instead of speaking, Seth just kept his arms crossed in front of his chest, looking pointedly away from her.


Frowning, Keely brushed her bangs away from her eyes. “Are you okay?”


“Actually, no, I’m not,” Seth retorted, an edge of anger to his voice making her flinch away from him.


For a moment she just stared at him, usually they were both the type to say that they were fine when something was wrong. Even though she was confused, Keely started to move closer to him, but his voice stopped her.


“What’s wrong with you?” he asked bitterly, his gaze harsh as it finally landed on her.


Her eyes widening, Keely stared at him momentarily. His words flung her back to the argument with Haley, bringing back the anger that had been dormant since she’d walked into the studio.


Feeling the fury blaze up into her mind she straightened, bringing herself to her utmost height as she glared at him. Maybe she wasn’t even close to being as tall as he, but it made her feel better, though the heels that Maureen had sent to her hotel room would have helped. “And what do you mean by that?” she retorted severely, her eyes narrowed on him as she took a step forward.


However Seth didn’t back down at her sudden anger, instead he just drew himself to his full height as well. “What did I mean by that, I wonder,” he answered, giving a short laugh that sounded far from being amused. “Do you enjoy screwing with my head or something?”


“Oh yeah,” she answered sarcastically, throwing her arm to the side. This time she couldn’t even say if she was overreacting, Keely didn’t pause long enough to think about it. “Because I’m the one that enjoys confusing people and playing mind games; that’s me.”


“What the hell are you talking about?” Seth threw back irritated.


Glowering at him, Keely crossed her arms defensively in front of her chest. “I don’t know, Mr Ryan, you tell me.”


“Oh, so now you want to talk to me?” he questioned, widening his eyes sardonically as he stared down at her from their close proximity. “You’re already done with Edward? That’s faster than normal for you, isn’t it?”


When her eyes widened it wasn’t done for effect, just her plain shock. Raising her hands to the side of her head, she let them fall back down, not sure of her next words feeling the dull pang that rocked her heart. But when she met his eyes, she clamped her mouth shut heatedly, grinding her teeth together. “Yeah, you just know me so well now, don’t you?” she stated irately. “Keely Staub, you know her, she’s the whore around these parts.”


“Oh, c’mon,” Seth said, grabbing her by the forearms.


However Keely knocked his hands away, pushing him in the chest forcefully so he fell back a step. She couldn’t care less about the glances they had to be receiving; she was shocked that she wasn’t seeing red.


“You know what Seth?” she exclaimed, “Go fuck yourself.”


Before he could say anything in response, Keely brushed past him, stomping furiously through the frozen people around them. Her band was waiting impatiently at the side of the stage. Thankfully the last band had departed, meaning she wouldn’t have to speak to Seth once more tonight. She could play her set then take off.


As she moved past, Keely caught sight of another girl that was wearing something besides a dress. But all she saw was the dark wavy hair cascading down over her shoulders and the faded jeans from the back before she hastily made her way to where the older men in her band were standing.


“C’mon guys,” she muttered, patting John absently on the shoulder as she hopped up the few steps to the plain stage.


To her surprise as she was picking up her guitar, she heard a concerned voice whisper, “Are you okay?”


At another moment Keely might have been touched as she looked at John’s older face, seeing the completely unfamiliar sheen of worry written across his features. But then she couldn’t feel anything but resentment. “I’m fine,” she answered curtly while eyeing him warily.


Suddenly John stiffened and straightened up. “Good, I don’t want you to screw up.”


Her eyes following him as he walked away to where his guitars were propped up behind his microphone stand, Keely shook her head as she grabbed the acoustic. Slipping the guitar strap over her shoulder, she moved up to her mic at the peak of the stage. At least she still remembered her set list that Maureen had given her.


“Hi,” she said, forcing her voice to be quiet even if it still had an edge to it, “This song is called Breaking Time.”


Starting up the song by strumming her guitar, Keely just went through the motions of singing, making her voice smooth as she ran over the notes casually. But even she could hear the difference in the way she usually performed it.


Most of the time she felt a serene cloud cover her, letting her be honest about her feelings and the sadness that the song possessed even if it was a love song. But with everything that had happened in just the past hour Keely couldn’t get her hand to play the guitar softly. Instead it was striking the chords angrily. But her annoyance level kept building up through the song.


There was a small group of people around the stage that were avidly listening to her music, but almost everyone else wasn’t even paying attention. Instead the sound of the conversation was practically covering her music. It more than bothered her, seeing the people bridging old age guffawing with each other while she sang. The only reason they were here would be to show to their peers that they “supported” the arts. Feeling irritation make her muscles tense, Keely ended the song with one last harsh chord.


What the hell was the point of her playing if they weren’t going to listen? She wasn’t a freaking act for them, she was a musician and if she was going to play to them, they should be listening. Not just to her, but to everyone that stepped on stage. They all deserved to be heard.


Clenching her jaw, Keely began to introduce the next song. “Now we’re going to do a cover of The Tragically Hip’s – oh, you know what? Screw it.”


Finishing furiously when her eyes caught Seth’s who was standing at the side of the stage, Keely’s voice got louder than ever before, getting more gazes caught on her.


Not bothering to explain herself, she dragged the guitar off her and spun around to her band. “You guys memorized the sheet music that I sent you, right?” she questioned, looking at their stricken faces expectantly.


When they all nodded, Keely let out a relieved sigh, grabbing instead the Stratocaster that Seth had gotten her for Christmas off the stand, dropping the acoustic back down. Before she could go back to the stage, John spoke again, gaining her attention. “I only know the rhythm section.”


“That’s okay,” she told him bluntly, “I want to play lead anyways. Boys, turn up the volume all the way.”


Taking her attention away from him, she stalked up to the point of the stage again, one hand on the neck of her guitar and the other grabbing the mic. But she found that while she’d gotten more attention, most of the people didn’t even pay attention. If she was going to be forced to sing here, she was going to be listened to at the very least, she figured music in general deserved that curtsey. She wasn’t an artist that was going to play for stuck up people who never cared anyways, she’d much rather go to some grungy club where the people appreciated the music. “Hey fuckers!” she shouted into the microphone and successfully gained the attention of the room in general.


“The song we’re actually going to play is called Yesterday’s Gone,” she announced loudly. But before she could finish, her eyes found the door to the party, watching as the guard from the door walked in.


“But, I’m going to start it another way,” Keely continued, glaring fiercely at the woman. “I’ll start this off without any words, I got so high I scratched ‘till I bled,” quoting Nirvana’s On A Plain for the second time in a few days, Keely put an emphasis on the word “high”, raising her eyebrows cheekily at the guard. Before she could think long enough to stop herself, she tore her hand off the microphone, sending the crowd in general the finger.


Hearing laughter from her band, Keely shouted the count in, turning the volume on her guitar all the way up, “One, two, three, four!”


The band exploded loudly from behind her with Yesterday’s Gone and Keely finally let herself hit the guitar as angrily as she needed. Resting her foot on the speaker in front of her, she leaned forward, letting her head move up and down with the tempo as the drums smashed from behind her.


Moving back to the microphone, she let her hand fall away from the body of the guitar so all that was heard in the room was strong bass line, the drums quieting down and John’s rhythm guitar.


Swaying back and forth with the tempo, Keely let go of her guitar entirely, cupping the mic that was remained captured in the stand between her two hands. As first live showings do, she could only think that this was a fitting debut for her song. Letting the lyrics bubble naturally from her, she closed her eyes and just let it come out in the calm before the storm.



“Word for word,


Suspicion lies,


The only tear in teenage eyes,


If you don’t mean,


Then we’ll just see,


When yesterday’s gone.”



As the last two lines came from her lungs, she began up the difficult guitar riff, bringing more tension into the music as it built towards the chorus. And when it was time for the chorus, Keely let go, shouting the lyrics in the way Seth had taught her so she held the notes but gained the raspiness.


The music fled by as Keely sang, letting the music thrum through her body, her heart beat in perfect timing with the tempo.


She jumped up and down at the front of the stage as she played, creating a bounce through the front of the crowd. She let go of her guitar for a moment as she sang, holding up her hand in the air. She walked up to John and they played; the guitars close and in perfect harmony with each other. She ran to the back where the drums were being thrashed as the drummer banged his head along and she returned the motion as she played the guitar. She played shoulder to shoulder with their bassists. She did everything that came naturally.


It was the best performance she could remember having with the Bitter Rivals. Keely couldn’t say what had changed between them in the time since they’d last played together at the television show that felt like years ago. Maybe in some way they really had come to respect her as a musician or maybe her anger that pulsed through the already fierce lyrics had just forced her to believe in the chemistry she felt.


As the music continued to build up, making her muscles tense, Keely stepped back up to the mic for the final verse. Playing the guitar steadily, her lips brushed against the microphone as she shouted the beginning, but ebbed down to a smooth voice at the end of the verse.



“As you are has never been so hard,


I haven’t been what I pretend,


And if this is how it will end,


I won’t cry,


We all have reason to die.”



At the end of the song, she strummed one last chord. Feeling the vibration tremble up her arm, she raised it to the side, holding it in the air as if by doing so the note would continue through her body.


When the note faded, Keely slipped the guitar strap from her shoulders.


Without a word to the crowd she spun around on her heel, holding the guitar by the neck at her side, she didn’t bother to check if they were offended or if they had enjoyed themselves. For the time being, she didn’t care, she’d felt alive and happy playing the song. Smiling at her band, Keely fell into step in front of them, the three following in line behind her.


Yet as she stepped off the stage, she looked up and all the happiness drained from her as she found Seth just steps away from her.


His eyes looked abruptly tired, the rage in them from their fight seeming to have gone. He just looked as if he hadn’t been sleeping, but the look in them was soft and a bit unfocused in the gold as he stared at her. Yet she stiffened her shoulders, she wasn’t that forgiving.


“That was–” he started.


Without letting him finish, Keely just stared at him blankly, not able to glare and shoved her guitar into his chest.


Not looking back to see his reaction, she walked off wordlessly, cutting through the crowd and heading straight to the bar. She didn’t know why she was heading there; Keely had no intentions of drinking. Not bothering to look at the people around her, she plopped down on a stool and dropped her head onto the sleek bar with a loud thump.


I’m called a cow, I’m not going to blow it now, For all the cows,” she moaned, not bothering to move from her slumped position as she felt her heart clenching dangerously. She didn’t know how Seth managed to do this to her. How could he have such a tight hold on not only her thoughts but her heart?


A voice interrupted her deepening melancholy thoughts.


“You’re not a cow.”







- First of all, those were my fucking awful song lyrics. Don't hate. Imagine them better. There is two other verses and a chorus, but I didn't write them because I'm horrible at song writing. So Keely did sing the whole song, just so you know.


More swearing than normal, but that's just because I'm letting my own thoughts more into the story lol. I swear a lot naturally, I can't help it. Usually I just delete it and make it more elegant but today I didn't bother.


Okay, so orignally this was supposed to be a part of the crossover chapter, but then I realized how long it would be, so this was posted! 


Awesome picture on the side was made by blackdust!


Anyways, since I posted On A Plain last chapter, I had nothing to upload this one... so the one is just one of the many reason Dave Grohl is my hero in about a billion thousand trillion ways. And I watch it to make me happy whenever I'm sad.


Be happy my friends lol. And worship Dave Grohl because he's about the best person to ever step on the foot of this earth.

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